Possessed by the Devil, page 11
part #2 of The Captive Collection Series
He doesn’t try to hide his wings. They vibrate gracefully behind him, buzzing with light and energy. So different to Lucifer’s shadows…
Still, his power rivals the Devil’s. It makes me squirm. I have this overwhelming feeling that I need to get on my knees and purge my sins. Like I need to apologize and start repenting. I press my lips together because I genuinely fear that I’m about to start involuntarily spilling all my darkest secrets, like he’s drawing them out of me—
“Remind me again why I would help you?” he asks, his voice light and delicate, not at all as imposing as the rest of him.
I swallow. Making sure my guilty secrets are washed down and not about to tumble out when I open my mouth. “Do you want the Devil gone or not?!”
He scoffs. “He will simply be replaced by another. It’s the same cycle. Lucifer, Beelzebub, Satan, and the rest… they fight, they destroy, then claim power. Then they topple one another and it goes round again.”
“Well. Maybe I can take them all out, one at a time—”
His patronizing laugh cuts me off. “I can feel his evil inside you. You’ll never be cleansed of it, even if you kill him.”
“I’m not… that’s not…”
“I work with hunters. I fight the war. I’ll do whatever it takes to help maintain the balance. But I will not work with someone who doesn’t have a genuine heart, and you, Angel, have nothing inside except lies. You lie to yourself, over and over, and you can never be free until you let the truth flow.”
“Okay, you pretentious ass, I’m done with this.” I get up into his face, despite the heat radiating from him, despite the way I feel like I might melt under his intense gaze. “Fine. You’re right. The Devil fucked me, many times, and I loved it. And yes, I love blood and death and chaos. Happy now? Is that honest enough that you can work with me?”
His smile is so condescending that I reach for my blade, ready to cut it from his face. Angel or not…
He reaches forward, placing a palm against my forehead. Electricity jolts through me. I twitch like a bitch on hot coals.
Then he steps back, hands clasped, nodding.
“You will never be free of his sin, but I believe you will continue fighting for the right cause, whether or not it’s what you feel on the inside.”
“Are all angels so preachy?”
“Are all of Lucifer’s toys so volatile?”
“Oh… Remiel.” My head shakes. “Call me Lucifer’s toy again, and I’ll show you exactly how fucked up I am on the inside.”
He simply nods again. Totally unfazed by the threat.
“If anything, it’s Lucifer who is my toy!” I babble.
I can’t see his face properly behind the light, it’s infuriating. “And anyway, aren’t we all just someone’s toy? Who owns you, Remiel? I bet there’s someone, and I’m not just talking God. Who is it that really pulls your strings?”
I catch the flicker across his face before the light becomes so blinding I have to shield my eyes completely. My laughter slips out as I duck down instinctively, because the wind has picked up, but we’re inside, and I can hear his wings flapping wildly. “Wow, that hit a nerve! It must be a woman—”
“Do not think you can affect me, mortal.” His voice doesn’t sound so light anymore. I try to peep through a crack in my fingers but it’s so bright my eyes stream. It feels like he’s above me though, hovering, his wings stirring up a storm. “You play with hellfire, and one day soon you might just burn. Choose your side wisely, because I will remember you, and if you make the wrong choice then Lilith’s armies will be the least of your worries. Vengeance is my favorite game.”
“Lilith?! What—”
Words spill from him, but I can’t understand them. A constant stream that intensifies with every passing second. It could be Latin. Most likely Enochian.
My skin’s on fire, intense heat makes my throat burn, then there’s a deafening clatter of metal on stone, and the angel is gone. I open my eyes, blinking to adjust to the now dim room, and find the most glorious blade I’ve ever seen lying at my feet.
“Angel? Angel!”
My eyes snap up, into Brooke’s concerned face.
“Ya’ll have been staring at your drink for thirty minutes. What gives?” she asks.
What gives?
Oh, I dunno, I’m just running and hiding from the King of Hell, whilst simultaneously wanting him to appear so I can either kill him or fuck him.
Maybe both.
I’ve jumped on the crazy train and it’s going too fast for me to get off. If I jump, I’m going to lose something along the way. My sanity? His touch? I either lose him or I lose myself. So I’m clinging on tight, praying we stop at a station soon so I can just pause, take a breath, work this shit out…
“Angel?”
I shrug. “Malphas warded me from Lucifer and it only took two hours of torture for him to agree to my terms, namely that he gains no sacrifice from me in return. And your angel dude gave me a blade, after torturing me with his pious bullshit. It’s going well—”
“A little too well?” Brooke shakes her head. “Let me help you. For once, just take the help.”
“You can’t help me.”
“Hey, I’m not that bad a hunter! I can handle—”
“That’s not what I mean. It’s not the killing part I need help with. It’s the shit inside me. The storm brewing. The doubt and fear and pain.”
Her eyebrows pinch.
“I think I… I think…” I can’t do it. I can’t say it out loud.
“What?”
“He’s under my skin.”
“Of course he is, honey! He’s the Devil. That’s his game. That’s how he works. Once he’s gone, you’ll be all good.”
“He’s been under my skin my whole life, I just didn’t know it. I’m not right, Brooke! I’m not like normal people, or even normal hunters. I crave more, I seek darkness, I find comfort in things that should repulse—”
She takes my hand over the table. “Look at me, sweetcheeks.”
I study her soft brown eyes, the full lips, the kind face that hides just how good a killer she actually is. I wish I looked like her. I wish I could hide it. But I can’t. I feel like my sickness is on show like a neon sign above my head.
Psycho here! Give me a knife and watch me go…
“Don’t let Remiel get to you. He’s not so bad, once you know how to handle him, but you can’t let that holier-than-thou crud effect you. He does it—”
“Brooke!” I gasp. “Are you… and him?!”
“What?! No!” she squeals, too loudly. “Anyway, what I’m sayin’ is ya’ll are exactly the person you’re meant to be. Okay, so you’re a little rough around the edges, and maybe you got some kink going on, but I ain’t ever met a more genuine sister. There’s no bullshit with you. You are what you are. Own it! Like you always have. I don’t recognize this self-doubt on you, it don’t suit.”
I shake my head, clicking my teeth quietly. “Brooke and an angel! How does that even work? I mean, is he allowed to, you know—”
“Shut your pie-hole!” she guffaws, slapping my hands on the table with a huge grin, almost as big as her tits which wobble with her laughter.
I think I might love this woman.
And that terrifies me more than anything else. I’m not supposed to form bonds. They can only end one way.
13
I can’t stop staring at the dagger.
Touching it.
Like some obsessed freak.
But it’s just so pretty. So perfect. Made for me.
My trusty old Seraph blade forgotten, this Enochian one is next level. It fucking sings to me in the sweetest lullaby! I hear it in my sleep, it taunts me both day and night.
It shimmers with faintly glowing symbols, and looks as sharp as my tongue on a bad day.
But the blessed blade isn’t the only thing haunting me. I can still hear Lucifer in my head. It seems he can still connect to me, but he can’t find me thanks to Malphas’s protection, and he’s furious.
Is it so wrong that I find that anger such a turn-on?
Okay, yes, I know it is. But still… a raging Lucifer is HOT. There’s nothing more mesmerizing than the sight of him losing his shit. The way his black eyes flare red. The way his muscles tighten. The way his wings coil behind him like shadowy beings. The way his skin starts to glow red when he’s really losing it…
Not when he’s all-out Devil mode, mind you. That was ugly scary shit.
Clearly, his whole pretty boy package is a carefully erected disguise. I knew the Devil couldn’t be that gorgeous. Not really. It’s just so distracting when he’s all spiky hair, sun-kissed muscle, and so lickable…
I shake my head.
So easy to forget what he is.
No, that’s not right. He can’t hide his power, his darkness, no matter how stunning the form… and that’s precisely what adds a whole extra layer of deliciousness.
Don’t even get me started on the way he directs his rage into my sexual pleasure. The pain, the harmony, the way we fit together like magic. My body comes alive under his touch, ignited by his carnal desires.
The shadows don’t intimidate me now. I want to fall into them and never come out…
My fingers slip inside my panties as I become lost to the feelings. I shiver as I imagine his breath against my ear, the way he whispers all the dirty and depraved things to me.
I’m rubbing furiously at myself, but I can’t climax. I just can’t quite get there. It’s not enough. I need more. I need hi—
Then why are you hiding, my Angel?
My hand yanks back, eyes snapping wide open like a guilty puppy. I grab the dagger. But of course, he’s not really here.
Don’t stop, you didn’t reach the finish line.
“I can’t!” I whimper, sinking back onto the bed.
He chuckles through my mind.
“What have you done to me?!” my voice cracks.
I brought you to life.
“I’m going to kill you.”
Silence.
I shift uncomfortably, waiting for his response.
Still, silence.
“Are you afraid of me?” I yell.
Yes.
A sob escapes my throat. What am I doing out here?
I’m afraid of what you do to me, Angel. Afraid that you’re out there and I can’t protect you. Afraid that I could lose you. Afraid that if you die I might explode so violently that the whole world will feel it.
“I’m not going to die, you drama queen.” I sit up, fluffing the pillows.
You might. You don’t know what you’re messing with.
“Lyra and Malphas have nothing over me.”
Lilith. Her name’s Lilith, not Lyra.
“The Lilith?” I sit up straighter.
The one and only.
“What happens when you die and she takes over?” I cough, finding those words catching in my throat.
Much of the same. It’s always the same shit in Hell, and on Earth.
“No retort about how you’re not going to die?!” I feel the panic in my belly like ice.
You know, for someone so bent on killing me, you sure have some confusing emotions on the subject.
“Why do you even care about me? About what I do, or where I am? You must have accepted thousands of deals over the years, why is claiming me so damned important to you?”
Don’t play naive. You only have to look inside yourself to know that answer.
“But you made me this way! That’s cheating. You molded me—”
I did no such thing. Your father, though?
My eyes roll. Here comes more of the traitorous dad bullshit.
You’ve always thrived on death and destruction. There’s only two scenarios when you truly feel at peace. That’s when you have blood on your hands, or when you’re under my touch.
Don’t say it.
All those years your father thought he was training you to fight me, but all he was doing was making you more perfect for me.
“Oh, that’s a good one!” I laugh, my stomach churning with bitter truth.
You do realize it’s not me you’re running from? You’re running from yourself. Too afraid to face up to what you really are. I told you my fears out loud, Angel. Now tell me yours.
“Alright, enough pillow talk. I can’t believe you’re not strong enough to have busted through Malphas’s ward yet. That disappoints me, Lucifer. Let’s get this over with, shall we? Meet me tonight, I’m in Oregon. This ends.”
I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.
I repeat the mantra to myself in case I bottle it. Lucifer is responsible for so much mess in my life. He’s toyed with me, and he must pay.
There’s nothing I’d love more than an angsty murderous reunion with you, Angel, but I’m a little tied up right now.
“Ly… Lilith?” That bitch. I knew she’d beat me to it if I moped around too long.
She can’t hold me for long.
“She has you literally chained up?!”
Is that jealousy?
I snort. Too loud. Too quickly.
Don’t worry, it’s not in the kinky way. She saves that for human men.
There’s a lump the size of a baseball in my throat. And I don’t know if it’s because Lilith is going to steal my kill, or if it’s precisely that — she’s stealing my kill, which means Lucifer dies.
I don’t want my revenge taken from me.
And I don’t want him taken from me.
“Arghhh!” I scream, clutching my head.
Do—
“Not another word! Just get the fuck out of my head, Lucifer.”
His reply doesn’t come.
In its place is his absence. The silence. The empty feeling in my core when he’s not with me.
This can’t happen. I don’t know what I want the most right now when it comes to the devil and his demise, but I do know that all options lead back to me, and I most certainly am not happy about Lilith being involved in any of it.
Sheathing my dagger, I pace the room as I think on a rescue plan.
I’m going to save the Devil.
Right before I kill him.
Probably.
“I need a hellgate,” I say, as Brooke leans over the table to scrutinize me. Her incredible tits create a canyon of a cleavage in front of me.
“Yassss, it’s showtime?! I just need to clean up a little mess from last night, then I’m with you—”
“Woah there.” I sit back, folding my arms. “You can’t come, Brooke. You know I work alone.”
“Na-uh.” She kicks back, mirroring my pose. Stubborn bitches that we are. “Not this time. Ya’ll don’t get to take on something this epic without me.”
“Brooke,” I sigh, “this is serious shit. I have no idea how to pull it off, but somehow I’m rescuing the devil from the Lilith and her legion, it’s not like—”
“Excuse the fuck me?!”
“Yes, I know you’re a kickass hunter, but—”
“You’re rescuing Lucifer? I thought you were on a mission to kill his repulsive ass?!”
“Oh, right.” My cheeks flare under her glare. “I am. I’m going to rescue him, then I’m going to kill him.”
She rubs her face and pinches the bridge of her nose. “I’ve always tried real hard to understand you, girl, but you’ve lost me this time.”
“It’s complicated. I don’t even understand myself.”
Brooke’s eyes widen in horror. “Oh, my sweet Lord! No, Angel, tell me no!”
I bite my lip.
“You’re fucking the Devil?!” she yells, and I about die, shrinking into my chair.
“Brooke! We’re in a Haven, keep your voice down!”
“Oh, right, because this news would be better suited to normal ears! Are ya’ll insane, bitch?!”
“Yes! You know this.”
Her eyes roll. She heaves out an exaggerated sigh. She leans forward again, pressing her fingers into her eyes. Takes another deep breath. Opens her eyes and offers me that ridiculous perfect pearly-white smile.
“I always wanted a trip to Hell. What should I wear? Is it hot as balls?”
I don’t know what to say. I’m not sure I can say anything that’s going to deter her, and dammit I need her contacts to find a gate. That’s the beauty of her running a Haven. She has an endless list of friends and contacts from all the hunters who pass through.
“Alright, I’m going to clean up, meet me back here at eight. I’ll have my guy, and then it’s road trip time, baby! Straight down the highway to hell!”
I watch open-mouthed as she struts off, dark curly hair swinging with the bounce in her hips. She’s fucking excited! That makes me even more nervous.
This is not going to go well.
14
“Remiel?!” I shove Brooke’s shoulder, glaring at the angel fuckwad behind her. “Your guy is Remiel, and you think I’ve got issues?”
“He’s here purely to open the hellgate, he’s not my guy.”
I can’t help snorting at her lies.
“Besides, getting involved with an angel is vastly different to getting involved with the Devil.”
Remiel glowers at me. Moody shit.
“How does an angel have access to a hellgate, anyway?” I ask him directly.
“Do you want in or not? Because I don’t have all night.”
I raise my eyes at Brooke. “Seriously. Angels are miserable douchebags. You should try a guy with a little more humor, a little more—”
“Ohhhkay,” she spins on her heels, shoving me forward. “Open her up, Remiel.”
“With pleasure.” He grins, drawing a sword that I swear wasn’t anywhere to be seen before.
“Not Angel!” she shrieks, pushing me behind her. “The gate!”
Chuckling to himself, the sword vanishes. “Just demonstrating my humor.”
Remiel pushes past us, mutters some gibberish, and a shimmering purple portal appears. We’re in the middle of nowhere, some ancient forest that we had to hike for an hour through. Still, I can’t help glancing around nervously.
