Painted Ghosts, page 17
A little bronze elephant sat on her palm. Sadie watched inquisitively, turning it around, but then glancing over at the mountain puzzle. Ria knew then Sadie wanted a piece. The little elephant sat on a window sill for years under thickening dust, falling only a few months back and bending its upturned trunk.
It had not been easy for Sadie, Ria pieced the memory together as she watched the giggling baby’s hands grasp at the sky. Her father had gone off with another woman and never made contact, Ria’s dad had come along overshadowing her and suddenly she had a new twin brother and a sister she never got on with.
Two months before coming to India Ria’s bit of the glass mountains had disappeared. When Jack and her mum were out she had searched the flat for it but was disappointed, feeling a hollowness inside — as though she had lost her brother forever.
Was it life that was strange? Or people?
When Ria’s dad had gone missing with Hari, their mother had hit the bottle. And it was then that Sadie got some sort of relationship back with her mum, for a time at least.
Clouds were now filtering away from peaks. ‘Do you know, Sadie, my bit of the glass mountains went missing.’ She looked over at her sister and spoke softly to cover traces of accusation. ‘Do you know where it is?’
Sadie continued to coo to Krish.
Ria giggled with her at the baby, then continued to Sadie. ‘That’s what I went looking for at my mum’s. Yeah. And to get some of my things. I knew she and Jack were out.’ It was best to fill Sadie in on her situation back home. ‘I go round the flat one day, then I remembered the attic. I found this old suitcase up there, Sadie.’ Then she felt uncomfortably like she was trying to justify herself. ‘Full of cash. I mean loads — thousands — got to be. Maybe more. I guess it was Jack’s from scams or something. Or was it my dad’s? I mean, big time. I mean, that much. I was thinking then, it wouldn’t be right—’ She paused, turning back towards the valley where the line of smoke had panned out flatly in the windless sky spreading a pall over a distant village, and tapped her foot. ‘But I must tell you, you know that stupid boy I was with — Terry. He went off with some kid in a band a week before. Then the restaurant I’m working in burns down.’ Ria bit her thumb nail a moment. Someone was singing in a nearby house. ‘And the row with Jack and he tries to hit me and tells me to get out of my own home. What else was there? And then there it is. I’m face to face with all this dosh. And I mean Sadie, it was like fate was staring me in the face and saying: “Go and find your brother.” All those sparkling notes. I stared at the cash for ages, fumbling it through my fingers. I reckoned I deserved it. I mean pushing me out of home. Compensation.’
‘Some story. And all that cash. Wow.’
‘The accident was such a shock,’ Ria acknowledged. ‘You and Ijay were so close — the perfect couple. So many of his friends at the funeral. And he never got to meet his little boy.’ She nodded at Krish and sent him a little smile. ‘You’ll be all right, sweetie pie.’
‘I’ve got Krish. He gets me through.’ Sadie smiled away tears. ‘You’re just in time, anyway. We’re taking Ijay’s ashes up to his bit of land soon. Up the hill.’
Nothing had been straightforward in Ijay’s life. The BMW had come off the road near Manchester. Driving alone, he could have fallen asleep, although rumours indicated he smoked lots of weed, was a connoisseur of drugs, that he had debts — through dealing. Another story had it that the accident was more sinister than that, that he had enemies. Girls at Ria’s restaurant who knew him said it was scams, talked of a train of other women. Ria knew Ijay was good at keeping things from Sadie, so probably she had no knowledge of these theories.
‘You’re gutted, I know,’ Ria tried to reassure her. ‘It’s been so tough for you. I wanted to be here for you.’ Ria hugged her again, but she was still tense. ‘I mean his aunt Padma must be in grief too.’
‘They’re all trying to help. They’re being sweet to me, cooking for me, looking after Krish.’ Sadie smiled. ‘But I do need my land back.’
‘You’ve got land here? How?’
‘All Ijay’s money — he put it into a piece of land just up the hill here—’ Sadie nodded towards the mountains. ‘It belongs to me and Krish now.’
‘Ijay left you something then.’
‘He was going to build a house on it for us. His dream. Live here and grow mangoes, the mountains above and behind us—’
Ria concluded Sadie really knew nothing of Ijay’s double life, or she ignored it. ‘Like gods protecting you.’
‘Bijal set it up. People from England — even Indian people from there — can’t buy here. Uncle Bijal had to do it in his name and set it up with Ijay.’
‘And it’s nearby? That’s exciting, Sadie. A project for you—’
‘It’s rough ground really. Ijay’s dream was to grow things, build a little house we could go to. Six months at home, six months here—’
‘You still can — on the hills under the mountains — amazing. What an inheritance for Krish. I can’t wait—’
‘When we take up the ashes, you can come — But it’s no use to me now. I need the money. I’ve got to get Bijal to sell it.’
‘You won’t keep coming back? To your own bit of land?’ Ria looked at her.
‘I’ve got contacts in London, shops and stall holders. They’ll sell anything from India.’
‘You’ve always been strong, Sadie,’ Ria felt closer to her sister. ‘I mean when my dad left you were there for me—’
‘You would have been taken into care.’
‘I’ll always be grateful.’ Ria reassured her. ‘And there’s just a chance I might find Hari. They say the Glass Mountains are somewhere around here.’
‘It’s a big place. None of the family know of him,’ Sadie said. ‘I remember sticking up for him at school once. Anyway, you’re calling yourself Ria now. What’s all that about?’
‘One day I got up singing at an open mic in a pub in Camden. I used my real name, Parvati — which I never really thought suited me. An Indian bloke came up to me after and said he could get me some singing work but I had to change my name. He came up with Ria. In India Ria means “singer”. He got me a few gigs, but it turned out he was ripping me off. And all the bad stuff going on, I came here. In English Ria means rebellious woman.’
‘You got that bit right.’ Sadie laughed but she looked tired.
2
Padma was small with intelligent darting eyes, and coming out quickly from the kitchen, flung down the basket of washing she was carrying and rushed to hug Ria when she got to the bottom of the stairs to the wide courtyard in front of the house. Her body was thin and fragile, as though shaped by years of surviving. Sadie joined them with Krish.
‘When we saw you, you were a baby,’ the little woman said, flapping warm arms round Ria and looking up at her. ‘Now you’re grown — all grown. My Parvati — Too long — why you don’t come to us.’
‘Ria,’ Ria said, noting that Padma’s English was quite good. ‘They call me.’ She laughed nervously as Sadie came down the outer stairs with Krish. ‘It’s my pet name now,’ Ria laughed again.
‘Parvati is a good name — wife of Shiva,’ Padma said. ‘Ria. You come to my house. You come and eat and sleep. And with your sister.’ She shook her head. ‘Your poor sister. Ijay was a lovely boy, always helping. And now, kismet — he is gone and we’re all in tears. Ijay, he’s my brother Lakshan’s son. He cannot believe his son is gone—’
‘We’re all devastated,’ Ria assured Padma. ‘It was all so sudden. I met Lakshan and Ijay’s mum at the funeral in Manchester. Such lovely people — and his mother so lost without her son. We all miss him.’
Ria was uncertain of herself. She had assumed having an Indian father everything would come naturally to her in India, but things seemed different and strange, so she kept something of herself back. If she wasn’t going to upset people and make herself look silly, she was going to have to go slowly and pick things up as she went along. ‘Here,’ Ria pulled a gift wrapped in gold and green from her bag and held it up to Padma who took it tentatively and held it to her chest with a smile. Ria hoped she would enjoy the perfume she had bought for her in Delhi.
‘You are your father’s child, you and Hari—’ Padma told Ria and turning to the kitchen door, she called for her youngest daughter, putting the present aside to open later.
Madhu was about nineteen and she looked fresh with clear eyes. Giving Ria a smile she hugged her briefly. Her hair was brushed back in a long pony tail with pink hair grips at the front, and she had silver earrings, not too long, and wore a shalwar kameez with yellow flower patterns. Madhu said, ‘Ria, at last, we meet. I heard all about you.’
‘She is studying,’ Padma nodded at her daughter.
Sadie took over: ‘Madhu goes to a local college to learn business and IT.’
‘Then a degree,’ Madhu smiled.
Padma smiled at her daughter. ‘My clever Madhu. She is the one who will be big. She will have businesses — like her father.’
‘Look how hard he has to work,’ Madhu said. ‘He’s just a tailor. And now, they make clothes in factories. Who wants clothes made for them anymore?’
‘He works very hard,’ her mother added.
‘He should have a factory and make clothes for big names in England.’
‘Where will the money come for a factory?’ Padma told them. ‘Banks give nothing. Hotels in the towns here and Dharamsala — uniforms, they need from Daddy-ji.’
Ria watched Madhu as she challenged her mother again. ‘How long will that last? Daya and I will get married — it’s costly. Anyway Mummy-ji we need food and drinks for our guest.’
‘All ready inside. I will get now,’ Padma obeyed, going inside the house.
Madhu waved for Ria to sit, and the couple sat on a bench in front of the house, with Sadie in an upright chair with Krish asleep.
‘It’s good to meet you, Madhu,’ Ria said. ‘And to be in India. I should have come ages ago. It makes me feel in contact with a side of myself I didn’t know much about. You like college?’
‘If you have a degree you can go to Dubai, or Canada, Australia. They want Indian professionals — not like England — it’s so hard to get in there now. All the immigration rules. Nobody even tries now. All the talent from this country goes to other places. We won’t have to bother about a little tailor’s business when India gets bigger.’
‘Daya will go to college too?’ Ria said.
‘My sister and my dad will be back soon. She helps him in his shop in town.’
‘Your shalwar kameez is so beautiful—’ Ria went to her bag and rummaged.
Sadie said, ‘Only the best will do for Madhu.’
‘I brought you these,’ Ria handed Madhu a packet. ‘Pens. I couldn’t carry much. Not on my own. You see—’ She nodded at her backpack. ‘But they are good ones — special.’
Madhu took them and put them aside with a brief glance.
‘I thought, you know,’ Ria tried to hide her embarrassment at the smallness of the gift. ‘You’re studying, you might need pens.’ But she knew it would not cover Madhu’s scorn.
‘What we don’t have here is modern technology, phones, i-pads, that sort of thing.’
‘Yes, yes,’ Ria gabbled nervously. At the edge of her vision she noticed a wry grin on Sadie’s lips.
Madhu leaned back. ‘You have everything in England.’
Padma came out of the house with plates of pakoras and cups of tea and nodded at Madhu and the basket of washing but Madhu acted as though she had not noticed.
‘Everyone has cars,’ Madhu took plates from her mother’s tray and handed them out.
‘I don’t,’ Sadie looked at Madhu. ‘We’re not all as rich as you think.’
‘We don’t need cars in London.’ Ria tried to soften tensions. ‘We can get around on buses and underground and taxis. It’s very easy.’
‘You must eat,’ Padma instructed them to fill their plates. ‘Nobody in England worries about anything.’
Madhu gave a saintly smile. ‘You do have everything there.’ And handed out cups of tea. ‘One day I’ll have a good job somewhere in the world, that’s all that matters to the family. I will send money home, of course.’
Padma began hanging washing on the line that stretched from the house to a pole along the low wall at the edge of the courtyard. Beyond the wall which served sometimes as a bench, the green land fell steeply half a kilometre away to where the stream flowed.
‘How much more studying do you have to do?’ Ria tried to reconnect with Madhu, but she just shrugged. ‘My restaurant where I worked burned down.’ Ria tried to keep conversation going.
Madhu kept up her smile. ‘Don’t you have a degree?’
‘She’s lucky,’ Sadie said to Ria, nodding at Madhu. ‘Without Daya working in the shop — only one person can study—’
‘Shush now,’ Padma called over to her daughter as breeze from the mountains rippled the line of washing she had hung up. ‘Ria is tired. You must rest now . . .’
*****
Sadie woke Ria at eight in the evening. The darkness overwhelmed her as she came out onto the veranda and the mountain air was cold. A single light bulb hung near the kitchen door, the blade of its filament skeletal against the night. Nearby a small fire burned in an iron bowl on the veranda. Ria shivered and Padma came to her with a shawl and draped it over her shoulders. ‘Come and sit near the fire. Bijal is here, and Daya. We will eat.’
‘You shouldn’t have waited for me.’ Ria looked over at the family sitting cross legged around the glowing embers. ‘You should eat, you must be hungry.’
‘Daddy-ji likes a fire,’ Madhu told her, pointing at the man squatting half in shadow half in the reflected glow.
‘He always makes a fire at night,’ Sadie said.
Ria watched them a moment, their faces lit up. Behind them the mountains were black and mysterious in their gloom. Above the ridges the sky with its trail of stars was paler. It seemed that the tiny fire was there not only to warm everyone but to stand as something, a symbol of life and survival against the odds of the bleakness and power of nature.
Bijal stood, came to her and shook her hand with a smile. A small man with wrinkled face and a cheerful glance, his eyes searched Ria’s in dim crimson light as he promised soon to take her to his shop. ‘You are welcome,’ he said. ‘We loved Ijay — auntie’s brother’s son — he was full of fun. But we have Ijay’s son, Krish. My daughters and my wife will look after you. We must eat,’ he continued. ‘It’s a small place, but you are welcome. All my life my wife has been by my side, without her, none of this would be possible. Let me tell you, she is a clever woman — she knows how to guide her husband. That is the most important thing in a marriage — not making food — guiding him, giving him ideas.’
‘Ria,’ Daya came to her next, throwing her arms round her. ‘The name suits you so well.’ A little taller than Madhu, but less slim than her sister, Daya had a broad smile and hugging Ria closely but gently, Ria felt her shoulders were a little tense. She smiled sincerely, and Ria held on to her hand a moment too long, feeling she had found someone she could get to know well.
Daya urged Ria towards the fire and the bowls of food and plates set out on a sheet beside it.
They ate dal and rice and spicy vegetables cross legged round the fire.
Having finished, Ria was revived, and excusing herself to go to her bag she came back with gifts, giving one to Bijal and the other to Daya.
‘They’re very nicely wrapped,’ Madhu pointed at the presents, unnerving Ria and reminding her she hadn’t wrapped Madhu’s pens.
‘You know I love books,’ Daya undid hers. ‘Indian birds. It’s wonderful.’ She held the book up in the light so everyone could see while Bijal pulled his gift from its wrapping.
Padma threw a couple more small logs in the fire bowl along with some paper to get more light and heat as Bijal held up a shirt made up of reds, golds and greens. Ria was aware of Madhu watching her carefully. And Sadie was probably thinking badly of her giving a shirt to a tailor. But she had found it in Camden and thought it was just the thing for him, forgetting at the time his occupation. She was apprehensive of making any more mistakes.
‘It’s wonderful, Daddy-ji,’ Daya took it from him, shook it, then held it up in front of him. ‘The colours, just you.’
‘Good, very nice,’ Padma began stacking dirty plates. ‘Now he can take me out. He always wears plain shirts. This is good for him.’
Bijal laughed. ‘We can go and watch films, eat in the big new restaurant.’
‘It really suits you Daddy-ji,’ Daya kept holding up the shirt. ‘How much in love they still are — he wants to take care of her still, it’s so nice.’ She handed the shirt to him. ‘And Daddy-ji’s shop is doing so well. We have a new contract coming to supply a hotel with uniforms, it’s so exciting, things are going so well. And Madhu can continue her studies. What else can we ask for?’
The family talked over cups of tea until the fire dimmed and the cold and tiredness drew them to their beds.
Ria was snug under her duvet with Sadie and Krish, but going for a pee meant going down outside stairs and squatting in a freezing shack whose contents seeped down to the stream.
*****
A breeze fluttered through red and green curtains in the kitchen doorway as Ria pushed through the following morning. Sunlight seemed to search out all crevices leaving few slim shadows. As she was going in Daya was coming out with a couple of round stainless steel food tins. They surprised each other, Daya nearly dropping them, Ria helping her to save them, and the two laughing.
‘Daddy-ji’s lunch,’ Daya said. ‘Dal, vegetable and roti. He will be out soon and we’ll go up to the shop. You can join us later. Mustn’t drop.’
Ria felt an intuitive understanding between them. Daya’s long black hair was bunched in a pony tail, the end hanging over her left shoulder. She had on a cerise and black Punjabi Suit with pink chunni head scarf around her neck but not pulled up over her head.
