Killer's Mark (Barone Syndicate #1), page 12
Lexi laughs harder than I’ve ever seen her laugh. It’s contagious.
“Ah, fuck,” Lexi rewinds the episode. “I missed the nominations.”
Luca arrives and he’s brought pizza and wine.
“It’s from Angelo’s.” He sets it down on the kitchen peninsula after kissing me ‘hello.’ “Ever had it?”
“No.”
Luca opens the pizza box to show me inside. There’s a thick margherita pizza, almost too big for the box it came in. It looks delicious. The smell reminds me how hungry I am.
“There’s enough for you too,” Luca says to Lexi. She was lifting her head from the couch, following the smell of the pizza. She nods at Luca and tentatively comes to the kitchen.
She’s quiet for once. All the bark she had making fun of me is gone. She actually seems slightly intimidated by Luca. I enjoy watching her squirm a little. Lexi sniffs at the pizza. “Mmm. I already had dinner, but it smells so good.”
“You should at least have one piece,” Luca insists.
We dig into the pizza. Lexi does take a piece but Luca and I eat most of it. We also crack into a bottle of wine.
When we’re done, I curl up with Luca on the couch and Lexi takes the arm chair. After flipping channels for a few minutes, we end up deciding on Palm Springs with Andy Samberg and Cristin Milioti.
As I open Hulu to play it, Lexi adds. “Hulu. Woo-hoo” in a dry tone as she looks at me over her wine glass. I ignore her.
“What’s it about?” Luca asks.
“I guess they’re stuck in some time-loop. Like they’re living the same day over and over,” I explain.
“Ah, kinda like Groundhog Day?” He asks.
I tilt my head and look at him. Lexi asks, “What’s that?”
“You’ve never seen Groundhog Day? With Bill Murray?” Luca asks us.
“Never heard of it,” I reply.
“It came out in the 90s?” he adds as if we’ll remember it.
“That’s when we came out too,” Lexi says.
Luca laughs and shakes his head. “Alright then.” He looks at his wine glass. “I think this wine might actually be older than you.”
“I don’t care as long as I’m old enough to drink it,” Lexi says. Luca chuckles again. “Now let’s watch a movie about someone stuck in a time-loop with someone that was on SNL this century.”
I like that Luca and Lexi are getting along. I know that her teasing him means the same thing it means when she teases me. It’s her way of showing that she likes you.
It’s also really nice to see Luca relaxed and joking around. If I had to be stuck in a loop, this wouldn’t be a bad day to keep reliving.
When the movie ends, Lexi heads off to bed. “I’m out. See you all tomorrow.”
Luca and I are left on the couch. It was nice watching the movie with his arm wrapped around me. His hand caressing my arm. Seeing him joke around with Lexi as if they were friends. It made me even more attracted to him.
I hear Lexi’s door close, and I turn to kiss Luca. Kiss him hard the way I’ve been wanting to since he walked into my apartment. He kisses me back, clearly also having no more patience.
Sitting here on the couch with him reminds me of the couch on his rooftop. I straddle his lap and his hands wrap my sides. My body tingles under his touch.
“Let’s move to my room.” I stand up and take his hand, leading him to my room.
“Ah, you put your bed together,” Luca admires as we enter my room. I close my door behind him. The room is still half-unpacked, but the bed, the important part, is done.
At the foot of the bed, I turn him toward me and kiss him some more. I want to keep making out with him. But I also can’t wait to get his pants off and play with the rest of him or feel his hands on my naked body.
I push him back onto the bed. It creaks slightly under his weight.
When I hop onto the bed to straddle his lap again, the bed gives a strange lurch.
BANG!
The right side of the bed collapses underneath us both. It dumps us onto the floor, rolling us off to the side like a staircase-turned-slide in a cartoon funhouse. Luca and I land against the boxes along the wall, smooshed up against each other.
I hear Lexi yell from the next room over, “WHAT THE HELL?!”
Luca looks shocked and bewildered, gazing at the ramped slope that used to be my bed. My only reaction is to laugh uncontrollably. Luca looks at me, still confused as I wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes. He starts to laugh along with me and pushes himself to sit up.
Seeing him try to sit up, squashed in this small alley between collapsed bed and packing boxes doesn’t help me to stop laughing. I finally catch my breath enough to talk. I grip my sides, sore from the laughter. “I don’t think … I tightened the bolts correctly.”
Luca just shakes his head. He’s finally made it out of the trap between the bed and boxes. He offers me a hand and pulls me up. He gives me a little kiss when I get to my feet. “Should we go back to my place?” I nod and follow him back out of my room, still smiling.
As we leave, I see Lexi peeking out her bedroom door.
“My bed collapsed. I didn’t put it together right. We’re going to his place,” I explain as I throw on my shoes and follow Luca out the door. Lexi shakes her head and closes the door heading back to her own bed.
I’m riding a surge of adrenaline from the shock of my bed collapsing. It didn’t do much to distract me from Luca for the long term, though. When we get into his car, I reach my hand across to his lap. Doesn’t feel like it distracted him too much either.
31
LUCA
On the drive back to my place, Gina reaches over and feels the bulge in my crotch. It feels so fucking good. I tilt my seat back just slightly, just to give her a little more room and access.
While I’m still driving, she unhooks my belt and unzips my pants. She reaches her hand inside. The feel of her hand on my bare cock is a relief. She strokes it up and down slowly. I keep my eyes on the road while she keeps her eyes on my cock.
Thankfully it’s late. The streets are basically empty.
Gina adjusts in her seat. She kneels in the passenger seat and leans over the center arm rest. I move my arm out of her way as she brings her head down to my lap.
“Fuck,” I moan as I feel her warm lips wrap the head of my cock. It feels so goddamn good. I wish that I could participate more. I wish I could put my mouth and hands somewhere on her. But I’m restricted to keeping us from causing an accident. It’s kind of fun though. Not being able to do anything but just enjoy Gina’s touch.
Somehow, we make it back to my place without incident. I pull through the garage door and turn off the car. Finally, I can use my hands for something more practical than steering the car.
Gina can tell we’ve parked, but she shows no sign of being done sucking my cock and there’s no way in hell I’m going to make her stop. I tilt my seat back a little more and reach one hand to her ass. I grab and stroke her ass through her jeans. Even through the denim I can feel the warmth of her pussy as I drag a finger along her crotch.
She takes her mouth from my cock and sits back in her seat on her knees. Gina pulls off her shirt and unhooks her bra and tosses them to the back seat. I take one of her breasts in my hand, massaging it and lightly pinching the nipple as she unbuttons her jeans.
She leans back toward me and kisses me. I can taste myself on her mouth, but it only makes me harder. Her mouth is wetter and softer than usual, warmed up by the work she did on my cock.
With her jeans unbuttoned, I can reach my hand down across her bare ass cheeks. I massage them as we kiss, then move my finger down under her thong, following it until I feel the velvety warmth of her pussy on my finger.
She’s wet. Fucking wet. My finger slides easily between her lips and slightly into her vagina. Gina arches her back, pressing her bare tits against my chest and moans. She puts her hand to my cock as she continues kissing me.
The blow job felt good, but fingering her warm, wet pussy at the same time she strokes my cock feels incredible.
Gina eventually turns back into her seat. She kicks off her shoes and pulls her jeans off as gracefully as she can in the passenger seat of a car. She’s completely naked. I lift my hips and pull my pants and underwear down around my ankles. It’s about the best I can do from the driver’s seat, but when I slide my seat back, it’s enough.
She crawls over the center of the car and into my lap. This is my favorite place to have Gina. Straddling my lap. Naked or not, it always turns me on.
As Gina lowers herself onto my lap, I help her position the tip of my cock to her entrance. She lowers herself down as I feel her warmth wrap around my entire cock. The blow job felt great, fingering her felt amazing, too. But this. This feels perfect. So perfect that I can never remember exactly how good it is, and it’s a surprise every time.
I put my hands around Gina’s waist and slide her up and down my shaft. I love the feel of her waist in my hands. It just fits. I can feel her core muscles tighten and her hips roll under my palms.
Steadily, we move faster. Her moans and yells become louder as she uses the roof of the car to brace herself. I want to take it all in, the look of painful pleasure on her face, the bounce of her breasts, her tight core under my hands, and my cock sliding in and out of her.
“Oh, fuck!” I moan as I watch her pussy take my cock. I move faster, knowing we’re close. I feel her core muscles shiver under my hands and feel the walls of her vagina squeeze my cock. I can’t help but fucking blow inside of her.
Her whole body shakes and she collapses against me. I kiss her neck and taste the light sweat of sex on her skin. She breathes deeply into my chest and I trace my finger up and down her back.
“At least your car didn’t fall apart,” she breathes.
In the morning, I leave Gina asleep in my bed and head down to the kitchen. Gina’s stayed with me two nights in a row. I don’t remember the last time I spent two nights in a row with someone.
How many more do I have with her? I don’t want it to end, but I know it will. I don’t know exactly how, but I have a sense it will be tragic. The only way to lose something you love is tragically. And when I love something, I lose it. Life takes it away from me. My parents. My adoptive mother. And now Gina. My heart aches as I bring the eggs and toast up to her. I’m in too deep. I’m a fool for letting it go this far.
I open the blinds and Gina rolls over in bed, stretching her arms out and blinking her eyes open. How can I ever leave this woman? The truth is, I don’t think I ever could. But I know she’ll leave me. When she knows who I really am. When she finds out what I’m supposed to do. Or once I do it, she’ll hate me, and I’ll lose her for good.
“Morning,” her face shines at me, brighter than the sun reflecting in my rooftop pool. It’s almost as blinding. My eyes hurt.
I set the tray of food down on the bed and lean in to kiss the top of her head. I close my eyes and breathe in. I record the memory of her scent in my brain. The way my soap and shampoo smell different on her.
“I have to work today.” I lean against the headboard and look out at the rooftop. “I can take you home after you eat.” Gina blinks at me but doesn’t say anything. She nods and continues to eat her breakfast. She offers a forkful of eggs to me. “I’m not hungry,” I sigh.
Gina dresses after she finishes eating. “Do you have an allen wrench I can borrow? I’m pretty sure I didn’t put my bed together correctly.”
I nod and lead her down to the studio. It’s on the opposite side of my building, above the carport. The place was definitely built for artists to have a studio. I use it as my workshop. Gina’s eyes widen as she looks at the electronics workbench. It’s the one I’ve been using most recently, so it’s strewn with wires, batteries, servos, cases, and various electronic sensors and modules.
I head to the metal fabrication section of the shop, the corner with metal stock, welding equipment, a drill press, and metal cut-off saw. It’s also where I’ve got all my tools hanging. I grab an adjustable wrench off its hook.
“Any idea what size you need?”
“No,” Gina calls across the workshop.
“Do you know where your bed is from?”
“It’s made by Article.”
“Is that a European company? Or are they from the US?”
“They’re from the US.”
“I’ll go with standard size then.” I grab a set of allen wrenches.
I walk across to the electronics bench she’s still looking over. “One of these should work.” I hand her the wrench set. “In case there are any bolts, this adjustable wrench will work for those.”
“Thanks,” she says, taking the tools from me. “What is this?” In her other hand she lifts a small black box, about the size of a Rubik’s Cube. It’s got three wires sticking out of one end and a small metal arm attached to the motor’s rotator. It’s the most recent thing I’ve been working on.
She looks at me with raised eyebrows. She’s curious, fascinated to know what I do in here. There isn’t a hint of accusation or suspicion as she looks at me. But I still take it for the sign that it is.
In truth, it’s a weapon. Everything in here is either a part for a weapon or a tool I use to make a weapon. None of it is obvious. I keep all my real weapons locked up and hidden. But this particular part, it’s the one I’m building to kill her father.
“That’s just a little motor for a prototype I’m working on for this project.” I take the motor from her. I move the little arm and it twists the motor, demonstrating its movement. “It’s for industrial ventilation systems,” I lie. I try to pick something that I think would be boring enough not to invite any follow-up questions. “I’m attaching this Bluetooth module so that it can be controlled remotely.” I point to the little green circuit board that’s about the size of a stick of gum and littered with small chips.
Gina looks around at the rest of the room like she’d love to ask about everything in here.
“We should get going.” Gina follows me out of the shop, and I close the door behind her.
On the drive, Gina stares out her window. After a while, she breaks the silence. “Would you ever leave here? Take a trip with me sometime?”
I take a breath and adjust my grip on the wheel. I can feel Gina looking at me but I squint at the road like it’s done something to piss me off. I scrape my hand across my jaw. “How long do you think this can last?”
There’s nothing but silence coming from the passenger side. I glance at Gina out of the corner of my eye. Her eyes are wide and fixed on me. Her jaw is set. I can barely even look at her. “I’m too old for you,” I fire.
“I don’t have a problem with your age.” Her voice is steady. “Do you think I’m too young for you? Am I too… immature?”
“No.” I can’t lie. I’ve seen more maturity in Gina than some of my exes ten years older than her. The more I get to know her the less her age matters to me. I try again. “You shouldn’t be with someone like me.”
“That’s for me to decide. I’m done with other people making decisions for me.”
I can feel Gina still looking at me as I grind my teeth.
“I’ve thought about this,” she continues. “Believe me, I have. I’ve decided I want to be with you. I want us to be together.” She looks out at the road in front of us, the road I’m still focusing my glare on. “But I can’t force you to be with me if you don’t want to.”
“Fuck.” I shove my fingers through my hair. “I want to be with you. Just…” I shake my head. I glance at Gina.
She’s looking at me. Her face is soft, not stern. “What?”
“It’s just, I don’t think you’re going to want to be with me. The more you get to know me.” I lower my gaze back to the road.
“Don’t,” she says. “Don’t worry about that. I want to know everything about you. Good or bad.” Gina sets her hand on my arm. Her soft hands send warmth through my cold and stiff body. “That’s the only way to love someone. To know them. And to let them know you.”
I move my hand to hold hers.
I know she’s right. But I also know I’m a fucking coward. I’ve always thought I wasn’t. I’m not afraid to take a life. I’m not afraid to lose mine. But I’m fucking scared of losing something I love. So scared that I’m afraid to let myself love anyone or anything. And I’m too chicken-shit to tell her the truth.
32
GINA
It’s a weird feeling to know something is right. What is it that makes me so certain? I mean, things have been going great with Luca so far. Except when he goes suddenly cold. Sometimes he doesn’t seem ready to let me in.
Luckily for us, I’m done with doubting. I’ve spent too much time wondering if I was doing the right or wrong thing. That always left me letting others make decisions for me. Now I’m working on shutting out the negative voices in my head and cutting off the doubting people in my life. I’m able to finally think about what I want.
And hot or cold, I want Luca. I’m patient enough to get to know him slowly. I know he’s not someone that opens up right away. He’s complicated under his rugged surface. But I’ll take that journey with him, as long as he wants me there.
When I get home, I start working on my bed. As much as I’d like to stay at Luca’s every night, this is my place and I should have a bed here. I tip the mattress off of the collapsed frame and lean it against the wall.
It looks like some of the bolts came loose, and the rails fell off the frame. Putting them on by hand wasn’t enough. One of the allen wrenches Luca gave me fits and it doesn’t take long for me to re-attach everything. I tighten the bolts and rattle the bed frame to make sure it’s sturdy. It’s got to be strong enough to hold Luca. I put the mattress back on and remake the bed.
I shoot over to the pilates studio to teach a class before I have another rehearsal. I think I’ve got an idea of how I want to end my piece. It came to me while I was fixing my bed, with thoughts of Luca floating in the back of my mind.
