Ocean Light (Psy-Changeling Trinity), page 27
Bowen’s mind flashed to those silent minutes with George this morning as he ran his eyes over the note Seraphina passed across to Kaia.
Dear Seraphina,
I’m conscious this is an unexpected message, but I hope you know it’s from the heart. You’re the most extraordinary, beautiful, and intelligent woman I’ve ever met. I wish I could’ve been a different man, a man who was good enough for you. But I’m not. And so I could never bring myself to approach you. Now there’s no more time but I can’t go without telling you.
I love you and I always will.
You’ll hear terrible things about me after I’m gone, and some of them will be true. I’ve betrayed us all, but BlackSea betrayed me first. I was never protected as a clan always promises to protect. I was left to suffer on my own. Why is BlackSea helping the Alliance when it can’t even help its own people?
What I’m doing, it’s for our benefit. BlackSea needs to focus on itself instead of extending the hand of friendship to another race.
I never meant to be a traitor, but BlackSea made me into one. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to come home again, but then, I’ve never had a home. At least with the money I’m going to be paid for what I’ve taken, I’ll be able to have a good life somewhere else, in a faraway ocean where I can keep my distance from those who would call themselves my people and yet have never supported me.
I’ll watch for you, Seraphina. If you can forgive me, then perhaps one day we’ll meet again.
Your servant,
George
Beside Bo, Kaia stared wide-eyed at her friend. “Tansy was right about George having a thing for you.”
Seraphina threw up her hands. “He’s barely spoken two words to me since he first set foot on Ryūjin!” Blowing a curl out of her eye, she jerked her head at the note. “What’s he talking about when he says he’s betraying BlackSea? What’s he done?”
“Stolen things,” Kaia said simply. “Can we keep this letter?”
Her friend nodded. “You need any assistance from me or Dex?”
“I think this is Malachai’s domain—there doesn’t appear to be any risk to Ryūjin itself.” Bo had no doubts that BlackSea’s security chief would brief Dex and Seraphina on what was going on, but Bo had some things he needed to say to the other man first.
Seraphina raised an eyebrow. “Careful, or I’ll start to think you want my job.”
“I already have the job I was born to do.” He felt Kaia stiffen beside him, ran his hand down her spine in a gentling caress.
His siren was a creature of the deep, Bowen a man bound to land.
Even if he won that five percent chance at life, where would they find common ground?
Chapter 50
“I like your island, Bebe.”
“That’s because it’s safe and warm. But it’s not home for you, child. You’re meant to fly free, a wild and laughing creature.”
—Bebe to Kaia (10)
FOCUSING ON THE here and now to deal with her visceral rejection of losing Bowen to the land that was his natural ecosystem, Kaia said, “Something is very wrong with George,” after Sera left the room.
Bowen continued to pet her back in slow, warm strokes that made her want to cry. “That letter definitely wasn’t from a cold-blooded saboteur. This sounds personal.”
“I only know bits and pieces about him.” Kaia had tried with George, learning the foods he liked and providing those for him as she did with all her clanmates, but he’d always maintained a wall of remoteness she couldn’t cross. “The most personal thing he ever told me was that he was an orphan, too—he grew up with his mother’s family as I did with mine.”
Bo frowned. “Your father’s family?”
“Oh, my paternal grandparents are wonderful.” Kaia loved them to pieces and it had nothing to do with the fact that they’d paid for her training as a chef—no, it was because they deeply understood the artistic heart of her, the same heart as had lived in their son. “But they’re older, and my father was their only child. The entire extended family decided I’d be better off growing up in an active young family.”
Bo nodded. “George said nothing else?”
“I have a feeling I’m forgetting something,” Kaia murmured, “but I can’t put my finger on it.” A frustrating will-o’-the-wisp just out of reach. “Malachai might know more. He would’ve run a security check before George came to work on Ryūjin.”
But her cousin scowled when she told him what George had done, then read out his note to Sera. “There’s nothing in George’s records to hint that he might have an issue with the clan,” he said, his eyes the clear sunlight of his other self and his body swaying.
Kaia didn’t have to ask to know he was on a ship caught in a heavy swell.
“There’s been another vanishing,” Bowen said without warning.
Malachai’s mouth tightened before he gave a curt nod.
Fingers trembling, Kaia lifted her hand to her mouth. She never forgot Hugo and the others, not even when she smiled, but she’d hoped they’d lose no more people to this evil. “Who?” she whispered.
“Not a clanmate you know,” Mal said gently, but his next words were far harder. “They made a mistake this time around and left a witness. We have a scent.”
“I don’t think that’s a coincidence.” Bowen folded his arms, his feet set apart and his voice holding the same hard edge. “And I don’t think they made a mistake.”
Malachai braced himself against a swell as his eyes became even less human, his pupils nearly as light as his irises. “The ones behind this wanted me out of the way so I couldn’t go after George.” His shoulder muscles bunched. “Their fucking timing was perfect. I’m fast but even if I was willing to abandon our taken clanmate”—an act of which Kaia knew Malachai was incapable—“I’m not fast enough to get back to Ryūjin in time to follow George.”
“Do you have anyone else who can track him through water?” Bowen asked Mal, and in that moment, they were two sides of the same coin. One human. One changeling. Both with minds that could think with cold clarity even when in the grip of furious anger.
“Tracking through water is difficult at the best of times. It’ll be impossible if George is determined not to be found. The ocean is in constant flux and water holds no footprints, keeps no traces.”
“Then this is mine, Mal.” Bowen held Kaia’s cousin’s eyes, the space between them humming with a dark masculine power. “I won’t touch George if I find him, but he’s holding my life and the lives of my people hostage. Even if I have to steal a fucking submersible, I won’t be sitting on my hands.”
Forty-three and a half hours.
Kaia’s brain kept counting down, relentless and unwavering. “I’m going with Bo,” she said before she could surrender to the fear that lurked always at the back of her mind.
“Kaia.” Malachai shook his head. “You—”
“I’m going.” With her tone, she told him not to say another word, not to betray the secret she couldn’t bring herself to tell Bowen. “And Bo is right—this is his life. If you use BlackSea’s power to keep him trapped on Ryūjin, you’re no better than those who are stealing our people.”
Malachai flinched. “We have no confirmation he wasn’t involved with the movements of the Alliance Fleet.”
“You have my word.” She knew the truth deep inside in a way that was painful to look at, the promise there one that would never be fulfilled. But she could use that knowledge to make sure Bowen got out of Ryūjin.
Unlike most members of BlackSea, Kaia had an advantage with Malachai—she could stand up to his dominance because he let her. Older than her by three years, he was used to treating her as a younger sibling . . . and he’d been there when she’d come in, broken and lost.
He’d never hurt her.
“Kaia.” It came out a growl from two male throats.
Turning, she glared at Bowen. “Stop it.”
“This is my fight.” His eyes flashed fire at her.
Narrowing her own, Kaia poked him in the chest. “No. It’s ours.”
“Shit.” Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, he hauled her close. “Ours then, Siren.” His next words were to Malachai. “We’re going to do this with or without your authorization.” Not a challenge, simple fact.
But Mal wasn’t a man to back down easily. “I can get together a team that knows how to move in the water.”
“Will they fight as hard to retrieve what George has taken?” Bowen demanded. “Will it mean as much to them?” Each word was a gauntlet thrown down between them.
Malachai’s body jerked violently again.
“Why are you on a ship?” Kaia asked. “You’re so fast in the water.” Nothing got in Mal’s way when he swam, which made him the perfect playmate for a little girl who wanted to swim to Bebe’s island but was afraid to go out alone.
“Ship’s a quick one and the witness is wounded and on a damaged vessel.” His eyes took in the way Kaia had her hand over Bowen’s heart, returned to her face.
And she saw him realize the truth, realize how she knew Bowen was no liar beyond any shadow of a doubt.
Those sunlight eyes darkened. “Lunatic,” he murmured.
“It’s in the genes.”
Switching his attention to Bowen, Mal said, “Are you healthy enough to undertake the chase? George might look like a stick but he’s very strong.”
“I’m up to ninety percent of normal,” Bowen answered with security chief practicality. “It’ll be enough—George might be strong, but he’s still a scientist.”
“Do it.” Mal’s form swayed with increasing intensity. “I’ll alert my people in Lantia that you have my authorization. Use what resources you need—and bring George back alive,” he said, and it was an uncompromising demand. “He’s Miane’s, not yours.”
“Understood.”
Mal’s strange, beautiful, golden eyes landed on Kaia once again. “You sure, Cookie?” An unspoken question, a hidden worry.
Though her gut churned, Kaia nodded. “Bo will need someone with him who understands how to handle the compound once we retrieve it from George.”
“Will it survive outside the fridge?”
“Long enough.” Because if it took them longer than just over forty-three hours to find George, the experiment was over, Bowen’s life forfeit.
Chapter 51
Lily, I need this photo sent out across the Alliance network. No one is to approach this man or do him any harm. Report his location only.
—Bowen Knight to Lily Knight
“I HATE THIS, that we’re hunting a friend,” Kaia said after Malachai hung up and Bo had spoken to Lily about sending out an alert on George. He knew Malachai would be giving the same order to his own people.
“I know.” Enfolding her in his arms, he whispered Heenali’s name in her ear—Kaia had made her loyalties clear by standing with him against Mal even knowing Bowen might soon be lost forever, and it left Bowen shaken down to the soul.
He had to honor her faith with his own. “Heenali deserves happiness and peace after all the horror in her past,” he said. “I don’t want it to be her, but I won’t turn my face from it if it is.”
“Oh, Bo.” A soft breath against his neck. “Thank you for trusting me with her.”
Pulling back so he could see her face, he pressed his forehead to hers. “Forgive me, Kaia, if it all goes wrong.” The bond between them might be forged of stubborn hope, but the realist part of his nature knew too well that hope alone couldn’t alter fate.
“There is nothing to forgive.” Fierce words.
Cupping her face in one hand, he just held her, held his siren with her marshmallow heart and her courage in loving him when he was her worst nightmare.
She turned, pressed her lips to his palm. “We have to get up to the surface.”
“Yes.” They had to be ready to move the instant George was spotted. “When’s the next scheduled submersible?”
“Four hours,” she said. “That’s a long time for George to disappear.”
Bo considered ejecting himself using an emergency capsule and asking to be hauled up, but not only would that take a lifepod out of commission, it’d shatter Ryūjin’s peace—and alert Dr. Kahananui that something very bad was going on.
“I’m guessing we have time,” he said after calculating all the possibilities. “If I were George, I’d swim as far as I could before coming up on shore. He’s going to be counting on the fact that Malachai will be running the search—and while your people are good, they’re limited to areas near oceans and other waterways.”
“So is George,” Kaia pointed out. “He won’t be able to go too far into the dry.”
“But he might deliberately head that way to shake off the scent, then swing back toward the water.” He ran his hands down the sides of Kaia’s body, her lightweight dress airy under his palms. “We’ll both need changes of clothes. No knowing if George will head to warmth or to cold.”
“I’ll go pack a small bag.”
Returning to his room after reluctantly releasing her, Bo did the same. As for money, he had access to his accounts via the phone.
It all took far too short a time.
With the hours ironically heavy on his hands, he strode to the window and looked out at the endless black that was his quarry’s domain. Bo couldn’t hunt him in the ocean. He’d have to wait for George to surface. And hope the other man didn’t simply stay in the silken wet darkness.
In the Deep
GEORGE SWEPT OUT his tentacles as he moved through the water with smooth grace. Here, he could be a dancer, could be as athletic as he wanted. In human form, he was awkward and gangly and without confidence. But in the cold blackness of the water that was his true home, he was a powerful being who made others scurry away.
He smiled inside his other self, feeling whole and strong and not damaged as he was in human form. Not scarred and used up and broken.
His tentacles thrashed.
He nearly lost his grip on the case he held so tightly.
Calm, be calm, his human self whispered. No one can touch us here.
It was difficult at times. The most primal part of his changeling nature occasionally wanted to take over. He knew that was dangerous. But part of him wanted the wildness in control. The others in the clan, when he heard them talking, they all spoke about how both sides of their nature were in balance, how it was never a fight between one or the other. They didn’t worry about shifting and becoming lost in the shift.
George never said anything when they talked like that; he’d learned his lesson as a child when he dared tell a long-ago friend about his fight for control. That friend had immediately told his own mother, who’d told George’s mother. She’d then made him go to extra lessons meant to teach him how to manage the powerful creature inside him.
Her voice had been soft and warm as she explained it wasn’t a punishment but only a thing he needed to learn for his future. Like math and science. He’d gone quietly because that was what he did, that was what made her happy.
George had loved his mother. He hadn’t liked it when she cried.
But though he’d gone to the lessons, he’d tried not to learn anything the adults wanted to teach him. He’d pretended he did, but inside, he stayed the same. Because if he ever learned how to control this self, he couldn’t lose himself in the black and forget the horrors that had been done to his human body.
In the water, he was free and strong and no one’s victim.
In the water, he was the predator and everything else quailed in front of him.
In the water, nothing could harm him.
He smiled again, the human part of him curled up happily within the wildness of his other side. And he thought about just giving in, taking that extra step and losing himself to the wildness forever. But no, he was a scientist and he’d read enough reports to know that changelings who did that, the “rogues,” inevitably went mad and began hunting their clanmates.
The latter didn’t worry George. He felt very little loyalty toward those who were meant to be his clan.
Except for Seraphina and Dr. Kahananui and Kaia.
Dr. Kahananui had always treated him as an equal even though he was less qualified. She’d even given him the position of responsibility that allowed him to take his vengeance. He’d never want to hurt her or the innocent child she carried in her womb.
The same with Kaia. She always made a special effort to bake his favorite cake at least once every month. She didn’t have to do that—there were a lot of people on the station and carrot cake wasn’t as popular as chocolate or red velvet. But Kaia always said he had just as much right to her skills as anyone else. He never felt bad asking her for a burger on a day when that wasn’t on the menu. She’d scowl and tell him she was busy, but then a little later, the burger would turn up on his desk.
Kaia was nice in a deep-inside way. He wouldn’t want to kill Kaia in his madness, either.
As for Seraphina . . .
He thrashed again, unable to stand the idea that he might hurt her in his insanity.
So no, he couldn’t give in to his primal heart. Not today, anyway.
Because the pain, it was growing inside him. Each year it felt as if it grew stronger, huger. Until he could no longer escape it. Maybe when that happened, he’d stop fighting. Maybe he’d forget Seraphina and Kaia and Dr. Kahananui.
Maybe he’d become this creature, magnificent and dangerous.
And because he didn’t want to be human again, he kept on swimming. The ones to whom he’d sold his spoils could wait. They could all wait.
He would come up in his own good time.
