Cole Fire, page 14
“What about your life away from work?” Hanna pressed.
“Even worse,” Cole laughed. “I can’t be satisfied. I literally can’t get no satisfaction. I want to be a better dad, a better grandfather, a better...” Cole paused.
“Better what?” Hanna said, feeling a bit uncomfortable with the blank needing to be filled in.
“I feel silly saying boyfriend. A whatever I am to Kelly.”
“Boyfriend is fine, but are you satisfied with your relationship?”
“Nope.” Cole reached over and turned down the music. “I feel like I’m letting her down, not taking our relationship further. To tell you the truth, I am terrified at the cliff that’s in front of me.”
“How do you mean?”
“I’ve been alone so long. It is that whole contentment thing. I longed for Erin’s mother for nearly my whole life. I waited, hoped, dreamed, and then finally gave up. We could have spent our entire lives together. Instead, my discontent drove me to take a job that ended it all. Then my inability to be content drove me further away. When I looked up, I realized I’d lost the only thing that could have ever made me content.”
Cole cleared his throat. He wasn’t sure how he let so much out. No turning back now, he thought.
“I think Kelly may just be where I finally find contentment. Silly talk for a guy way closer to retirement than from it.” Cole paused. “How about you? Are you happy?” Cole knew he would not speak until she responded.
Hanna reached over and turned the music back up. “I like this one.” It Must Have Been the Roses filled the car. Cole didn’t move.
“I am very lonely,” Hanna said after a minute. “I have spent way too long alone, too. I’m happy, too. I can’t wait to go to work each day. Truly. It is the most fulfilling thing I have ever done. We never get to talk, I mean, really talk. I just want to say thank you for taking a chance on me. I know I screw up a lot, and have oceans of stuff to learn, but I’m so grateful.”
“That’s wonderful. You have come a long way. I probably don’t say it enough, if ever, but you are exactly what I need at that desk.”
“Enough, this is getting icky. I want to know more about the content part. You know, I’m not into religion or spiritual stuff. I tried Transcendental Meditation, and Kabbalah. And nothin.’ You know what I mean?” Hanna flicked on her turn signal and moved to the center lane as they pulled onto the Golden Gate Bridge. “I know you’re into your faith, but it’s different. You don’t try to preach to me or convert me. I appreciate you respecting my beliefs or lack of them.” Hanna laughed.
“I didn’t always have a strong belief in anything. I mean, I believed in God. But frankly it didn’t matter. Seeing Ellie, Erin’s mom, again changed a lot of things. It was then I reevaluated what my core beliefs were, my world view, and I realized that if she believed that God was that real, then I must explore it, too. So my faith is very important to me. I am a work in progress and I will do and say things that won’t be real Christian on occasion, probably too often, but I’m at fault, not God.
“The contentment thing is a constant struggle. I feel sometimes like I have been given so much and it still isn’t enough. I feel so guilty for being such an ingrate. But there is so much I want to do still—places to go, a book to write, things I want to share with my granddaughter. I want to sit for days and just look at Kelly’s smile and listen to her talk. I can’t do those things. There’s work, bills to pay, promises to keep. And The Fight, it’s always The Fight; truth, justice and the American way! You know? Right the wrongs of the world, one word, in a newspaper, at a time.” Cole gave her a melancholy smile.
“So how do I fix that in my life? I want to do what you do. I can’t go back to school. I probably would do well if I did. I see the fast-ass secretaries around me and I think I can’t end up like that. You know? I want to do things, too. Meeting Skeeter the other day was a rush like I have never felt in my life. My god, what if I could do that all the time! Do you ever get used to it? I loved it.”
“That’s the reason I can’t give it up. But you can still do whatever you want.”
“Not really. I squandered my past. I coulda, shoulda, woulda done a lot of things. I sat, stewed, and soured.” Hanna sighed.
“Do you realize you’re telling the story of over twenty-five years of my life? It took losing the person I loved most in the world to bring me to a place where I could see. We couldn’t have had this conversation five years ago. We would have jumped off this bridge, hand-in-hand!” Cole laughed. “Not literally. But I had reached a very sad, dark, miserable place. Watching Ellie die with such dignity, peace and grace made me realize what a gift life is.”
“But how?”
“There is a clarity when one grows more distant from their past. The older I get, the more I realize most of the things I love now, I could have begun long ago. I choose to press on through what I don’t like, and toward the things I do.”
They both sat listening to music and reflecting. Cole found his words were directed at himself as much as Hanna. There were changes he still needed to make. This time he was in charge, they were his changes, his way, and in his time.
“I’m willing to learn and do and help in any way I can. I know I said that in my interview, but those words have a different meaning now. You said I was exactly what you needed at my desk. Did you mean it, or were you just being nice?” Hanna pressed.
“I’m not that nice.”
“I guess what I’m trying to say is thank you. We are kind of alike, and I think I have begun turning that corner since I’ve work for you.”
“With me?” Cole glanced at Hanna as a tear rolled down her cheek.
“Pigpen or Keith Godchaux?” She asked, softly.
“Donna.” Cole chuckled. “Brent Mydland was the best singer.”
This time Cole turned the music up, just in time for the opening chords of Bird Song.
Calle Del Mar is a pretty little street that leads to a nice park. It took some brain work on Cole’s part to remember exactly how to get there. Hanna relied on her in-dash GPS. She humored Cole and let him think he was leading the way.
The Lunch Box is at the end of a tiny strip of shops that runs at a ninety-degree angle with the street. As they pulled into the parking lot, Cole pointed out a young man sitting beneath an umbrella next to the Lunch Box sign.
“Bet that’s him.”
As they got out of the car, the young man stood.
“Mr. Cole?”
“Sage actually, but please call me Cole.”
Tyler Linklater took Cole’s outstretched hand. “Who’s this?” Tyler didn’t seem happy with the extra company.
“My chauffeur,” Cole quipped.
“Hi, I’m Hanna. His administrative assistant. Are you hungry?”
“I really am.”
“How about we grab something and eat out here?” Hanna smiled as she took control of the conversation.
A few minutes later the trio sat under a large faded red umbrella. Cole took it nice and slow. “Nice bike.”
“Hella fast, too.” Tyler beamed.
“How’s the pulled pork?”
“Great.” Tyler turned to Hanna, “What’d you get?”
“Tuna melt.”
Cole took a big bite of his salmon po’ boy and watched Hanna and the young man chat. They seemed to have made a connection and Cole wasn’t going to rock the boat. He studied Hanna. There was a lot more to her than he imagined. She was warming the kid up like a pro, small talk, no leading questions, ETM stuff, lights and sirens, was the training difficult. She was as far from Jesse Monday as a person could get.
Every time she took a bite or a sip of soda, Tyler would glance at Cole and smile.
“How long have you been a newspaper guy?” he finally asked Cole.
“Just over thirty-five years. I’m one of the old farts at the paper.”
“You like it?”
Must be the day for it, Cole thought. “Yeah, love it. How about you, how long have you been an EMT?”
“About three years. It’s pretty cool but I don’t want to do it much longer.”
“Really, what do want to do?” Hanna asked.
“I want to be a cop. That’s kind of why I wanted to talk to you,” Tyler said, looking Cole straight in the eyes.
There it was. People needed a reason to tell their story. Pride, guilt, remorse or fear. Tyler Linklater was scared.
“Why’s that?” Hanna continued.
“Is this on the record?”
“You’ve been watching TV!” Hanna giggled. “No, it’s not on the record. We’ll tell you when to worry. I’m kidding. Please go on.”
“I don’t want something like this screwing up my chances to be in law enforcement, you know?” Tyler picked up a morsel of cabbage slaw from his sandwich wrapper. “I think I made a real bad choice.”
The three sat quietly eating their lunch for several minutes.
“So where did you grow up?” Hanna broke the silence.
“Cupertino. Tino Pioneers baseball, and bag boy at Stevens Creek Market. I miss it sometimes.”
“It’s not far away,” Hanna offered.
“Nothing to go back to now. My mom died three years ago, so you know, lots of memories. You kind of remind me of her in a lot of ways. Mostly your eyes. You have kind eyes.”
“That’s very nice. You must miss her a lot.”
“A lot.” Tyler nodded.
“How about your dad?” Cole asked.
“He left when I was three. We never heard from him again,” Tyler replied.
“Tell me something, Tyler. What did you mean when you said you made a bad choice?”
Tyler looked at Hanna, and then said, “The shooting. It was fake. The whole thing. That preacher. He’s not dead.”
“What do you mean?” Hanna was not prepared for the response she got.
“You’re telling us that Jesse Monday is alive and well?”
“Yes, sir. I talked to him. He wasn’t shot or anything. It was all faked. One big punk job on the world.”
“Tell us about what happened. From the beginning.” Hanna said reassuringly. “It is really important, Tyler.”
“I swear to god, you are my mom.” Tyler laughed. “She used to say that to me all the time. Maybe you should adopt me! You’re really good at the mom thing.”
“You’re sweet. Please, what happened?” Hanna said, fighting back a lump in her throat.
“My partner Ryan and I were taking our break. There’s a wide paved area that goes into the little park at Ashby and Fell. It’s easy to get in and out of. Anyway, this guy walks up to the driver side window.
“The guy asks if we always park there. Ryan’s kind of a smartass sometimes and he said, ‘What’s it to you.’
“‘Maybe I’m talking to the wrong guys,’ the guy says and starts to walk off.
“‘About what?’ Ryan called after him.
“I wish he would have kept his mouth shut.” Tyler looked down and picked at his sandwich wrapper. “So, the guy turns around and comes back to the window. “Money,” he says.
“‘For what?’ Ryan asked.
“‘I need a little favor.’
“‘We don’t do drugs. Take, sell, hold, nothin,’ Ryan replied.
“‘Good,’ he said. ‘That’s good. I just want you to do your job. Fifteen, twenty minutes tops. Then we forget we ever met.’
“I told Ryan I didn’t like the guy, and that we should go. He wouldn’t leave.”
“‘So what’s in it for us?’ Ryan asked sarcastically.
“Fifteen a piece.’”
“‘Get lost,’ Ryan said and started to roll up his window.
“‘Grand,” the guy said.
“‘Fifteen thousand dollars? To do what exactly?’
“‘It’s simple, really. There’s going to be a shooting.’
“‘I’m out,’ Ryan said.
“‘It’s fake. Staged. We need someone to disappear. The best way is if he’s dead. He will appear to be shot. You guys will take the call, put him in the back, drive him to the hospital. Our people will take it from there.’
“How many laws is that breaking?” I asked him.
“‘None. What I will insist on is that you turn off your radios during that time. You are off the clock, so to speak. Any problem with that? Nope,” Ryan said. He was really excited.
“I really needed to ask some questions, like, how do we know the guy isn’t really shot? Who is he? How do we get paid? Who the hell are you? You know? This is really weird. I swear, all I wanted to do is run. I do watch a lot of TV, and this is the kind of shit that gets people killed.” Tyler was getting agitated reliving the memory.
“So why’d you do it?” Hanna asked.
“Ryan. He convinced me we could do it in a heartbeat. So I asked my questions, got my answers, and agreed to go along with it.”
“Who was the guy?” Cole asked.
“Skeeter something. Weird name, huh?”
“Yeah,” Cole agreed.
“How did he find you?” Hanna asked.
“He said he’d been watching us. Saw we came there every day. He was staying across the street or something. I don’t really remember.”
“So how did you get paid?”
“He told us that he would call Ryan’s cell phone in an hour. We would go to the Starbucks on Fulton. No more than three minutes, if that, from where we were. He would be there, flag us down, we would pick up the guy and go. He handed Ryan two envelopes. They had five grand in them. He said he would throw a backpack in with the guy we put in the ambulance. The rest would be in there. Crazy, huh?”
“Just like on TV,” Cole said.
“This is the part that I’m worried about, though,” Tyler began. “Ryan made a smart remark about taking off with the money. This Skeeter guy says, he found us once, he would find us again.” Tyler shook his head. “He said if we told anyone, we would be real sorry. It was really scary the way he said it. Kind of like dead sorry, you know?”
“Is that why Ryan took off?” Cole asked.
“How’d you know that?”
“How’d we find you?” Cole said flatly.
Tyler shifted on the bench. Hanna looked at Cole, and wadded up her sandwich wrapper. Cole chomped ice and watched a couple getting out of an Audi with a big, ugly dog.
“Why do people take big, nasty, slobbery things like that in a car with them?” Cole sneered.
“Love,” Tyler said brightly. “You ever had a dog?”
“When I was a kid.”
“Good times, right?”
“So what happened when you got to the hospital?” Cole said, getting back on track.
“Half a mile before we get there, a guy flagged us down and got in my side of the ambulance. I was in the back. He crawled into the back, gave, what did you say his name was, Jesse?”
“Yes.”
“He gives Jesse a jacket, baseball cap and a sort of duffle bag, a suitcase kind of thing. Jesse goes up front. The guy gets on the gurney, we drive about a hundred yards and there’s a cab. Jesse jumps out, gets in the cab and they’re off.” Tyler paused for a moment. “Here’s the funny part. We back into Emergency and there are two guys in scrubs waiting at the sliders. I open the back, and they rush up and pull out the gurney. That’s my job. Hospital people never do it. Then, one of the guys winks at me and grins. They’re Skeeter’s guys! I watched them roll the “not Jesse” into the sliding doors. They turn left! Emergency is to the right. Nobody saw a thing!” Tyler was more animated than in the entire conversation. “I must admit, it was pretty slick.”
“Just like on TV.” Cole frowned and took a drink of his soda.
“Then what did you do?”
“Turned the radios back on. It was only sixteen minutes. Nobody even noticed. We drove back to the park. We opened the backpack, and sure enough, there was twenty thousand dollars. I wouldn’t have cared if it hadn’t been there, you know, I mean I already got five thousand for doin’ nothin’.” Tyler laughed. “I know somehow it’s wrong but, damn, that is a lot of money.”
“So then?” Cole chimed in.
“We drove around and I realized we left the gurney at St. Mary’s, so we drove over and found it right by the doors.”
“What about the mortuary?” Hanna asked, more thinking out loud than a question for Tyler.
“I don’t know. I guess Skeeter had that covered, too.”
“You throw enough money around and you can get anything done. Right, Sport?”
“I guess so,” Tyler replied.
“We appreciate you talking to us, Tyler. I think that there is a lot more to this story. Your friend Skeeter has some answering to do.”
“Don’t tell him you talked to me!”
“No, no, that won’t be necessary,” Hanna said calmly.
“The guy I want to talk to is Jesse Monday. You have been a great help, young man.” Cole patted Tyler on the shoulder. “Let me tell you something. If I was your age, had been in your place, I would have probably done the same thing. Except I would have bought a Porsche. Money went a lot further back then!” Cole stood and said to Hanna, “Ready to go?”
“I’ve enjoyed chatting with you, Tyler.” Hanna stood and offered him her hand.
“I feel like I had lunch with my mom. It really felt good. God bless you, it really meant a lot to me.” To Hanna’s amazement, Tyler jumped to his feet and gave her a hug.
As Hanna walked past Tyler’s motorcycle, she turned and said, “You be careful on that thing!”
“Yes, mom!” Tyler called back.
“Mom? Really?” Cole teased.
* * *
As Cole and Hanna drove back toward the city, windows rolled down, and Me and My Uncle blasting from the stereo, Jesse Monday approached the front door of Miki and Mini Morgan.
Jesse stood for a long moment. He could hear voices through the door. He knew what he must do, what he would face, but it had to be done. He took a deep breath, breathed a prayer and gave the door three hard, hearty knocks.
The door opened and Miki Morgan gasped. “Jesse, is it you?”
“It’s me.”
The tiny woman threw her arms around his waist and wept. Moments later, Mini came to the door.
