Miles Away from Home, page 2
The smell of roasting meat and woodsmoke made my stomach rumble. Guess they weren’t vegetarians after all. For Tate’s sake, I hoped the other stuff was true. We were getting close to the gate signaling the border for the community. My feet started to drag. This was it for Tate and me. I’d be leaving him. We wouldn’t be pack. He’s too little to feel the bonds yet. They don’t come till a Wa’ya’s first change. Next year when Tate had his first shift, he would bond to the pack he’s with.
The thought stopped me cold.
Tate looked at me, head tilted. “Why you stopping now? All day it was go, go, go.”
I swallowed, even though my mouth felt as dry as a cracked rubber tire. “I’m not going any further with you. You need to go the rest of the way on your own. An alpha named Austin lives in the big house. You tell him our pack doesn’t want you no more. He’ll let you come in.”
“What?” Fear made Tate’s voice quiver. “You said a new home.”
“Yes, a new home for you. Not me.” I had a long haul still, just one more day till the change. I would camp for the night and take the bus back in the morning. Then hike into the woods, where we were already supposed to be, set up camp to look like I did take Tate with me, and wait till my wolf came.
“You don’t want to be my brother?” The dust from the road coated his sweaty face, but it was the lines of fat tears that punched me in the gut.
“I can’t be. Momma said to get rid of you.” I had to hold my breath to stop myself from crying in front of him.
“Momma doesn’t like me ‘cause I’m small,” Tate said miserably.
“You ain’t always gonna be small.”
Tate gazed up the road. “Maybe they won’t like me ‘cause I’m small.”
I sniffed and rubbed my nose against my shoulder. “They seem nice.”
He looked at me sharply. “Then stay!”
“The change is only two nights away. I’d be a strange wolf here. They might rip me up. You ain’t pack yet. I told you, Momma said to get rid of you. So,” I extended my arm up the road. “Go on and get.”
“You gonna come back after?” Tate kicked at the rocks on the dirt road.
I gritted my teeth, holding back from giving him a hug. It would be better if he wanted to leave. Tate wouldn’t bond with a new pack if he thought I was going to come for him. “Nope.” I repositioned the pack on my shoulders. “Maybe I’ll see you around in a few, but don’t go looking for me to rescue you.”
Ugly loud sobs escaped from Tate and he huddled over grabbing his stomach as if kicked. I took three large steps away from him. It was too late to do anything about this now. There was no Tika to care for him and our momma felt the pack was big enough. This was the best thing I could do for him. I picked up a rock from the road and clipped him in the arm with it. He looked up with a mixture of shock and hurt.
“Go on now. Head down that road.” I was firm, imagining my daddy barking orders.
“Miles?” Tate took a step toward me, disbelief marking his features.
“You heard me, runt!” Spittle flew from my lips as I leered. “We are done with you. We don’t need a runt in the pack.” I turned on my heel and walked away. At first I could hear him still taking steps toward me, but when I didn’t look back, he stopped. I had a moment of happiness when his footfalls sped up and he ran away from me, up the road to where the red wolf pack lived. They would accept him. They would see how gentle and kind he was. They just had to.
Chapter Three
Present Day
“I can’t believe you made me leave her like that! The kidnapping was bad enough, but to leave her on the side of the road with an obvious concussion. Raff is going to be out for blood.” Akela stomped on the dashboard with her foot.
Her outburst was actually a relief. She hadn’t spoken a word as I drove for the last forty minutes. Besides the sound of her grating teeth, she was the picture of silence. Staring pointedly out the window, she avoided any interaction with me. I turned to her and smiled, excited she decided to engage me in any way.
“What the hell are you smiling at? Are you completely deranged and broken?” Using her index finger, she made a circle gesture in front of her face. “In case you’re confused. This is me. Being angry. At you!”
“I guess.” I shrugged.
“What do you mean, you guess?” She threw up her hands as her voice rose an octave. “I’m literally telling you I’m mad.”
“I guess I’m broken,” I clarified.
Her rage deflated and she slumped back into the chair. Taking a slow breath in and out, she scrubbed her hands over her face. Long golden strands covered eyes the color of the Caribbean Sea. Not that I’ve ever been, but there are these brochures hanging at the travel agency next door to the garage where I work. I pass them on my way to grab lunch every day. The water always made me think of Akela, so alluring, you just wanted to dive right in.
“Oh, Miles,” her voice caught and my gut clenched at the sound. “What are we going to do?”
I liked that she said we. Maybe it was finally dawning on her there was only one path forward for us. “What do you mean?”
Those piercing eyes searched my face for answers I knew she wouldn’t find. “It’s like we’re that damn U2 song.”
She meant With Or Without You. The irony that it played the one and only time I danced with her wasn’t lost on me. “You have to live with me. We tried the other way longer than what is natural for our kind.” I didn’t mean to sound gruff, but I’d waited years for her. She may not have been the one that broke me, but she was responsible for me acting deranged. I know I didn’t deserve her. Akela was this perfectly beautiful untouchable thing. I was a giant hulking mess. She was my fated mate, and unfortunately for her, it meant I was also her fate.
A combination of a sob and a strained laugh passed her lips. “Where are we going, by the way?”
Abducting Raff’s woman hadn’t been a thing I planned out well. Don’t get me wrong, I very much wanted to do it, had fantasized about how to get even with that arrogant prick Raff, but most of the success was dumb luck. Caius, my “no self-control” pack mate, and I were driving to get parts for a car we were fixing up. I saw Chloe and her pack driving on the freeway and told Caius to follow. We did it for hours without any idea if it would work. I worried they would not take the chance and ever leave Chloe alone. Then opportunity knocked when she ditched their omega and headed off on her own. It was then my convoluted plan of forcing the issue with Akela unfolded. Pulling one over the golden boy alpha was icing on the cake.
“We have a cabin we use for the full moon, but I need to make a stop at my house first. I don’t have provisions with me.” I could feel her scrutiny as a slow warmth settled on my cheeks. I shifted in my seat.
“Looks like we are driving in the direction of my home.”
She was totally going to bust my balls for this. “My house is nearby.”
She made a quick little humming sound. “How close by?”
My daddy always told me only lie to your mate for a damn good reason. Of course, my momma was scary as shit, so he found lying to her necessary often enough to save his sorry ass. I wasn’t sure which way to play this with Akela. It would have been better just to head to the cabin and meet up with the guys. I just hadn’t thought it through. “I live off of Pleasant Hill Road.”
I could hear her intake of breath. “That’s Austin pack territory. How can your wolf stand it? How has this never been an issue?”
“Well, I don’t stick around for the shift. I’m in my own territory for that week.” I couldn’t resist glancing her way. Hoping she would let it go, but knowing she would wring the entire embarrassing truth out of me.
Her feet dropped from the dashboard and she leaned forward with pursed lips. “Are you telling me your pack stays only a couple of miles away from mine? And every month you drive what must be at least a hundred miles away?”
“I live alone. The guys are spread out. Only Kyle, our omega, stays at the cabin. It’s quiet and peaceful there but can get boring fast. We all meet up when it’s time.”
“Why would you do that?” she asked incredulous. “It doesn’t sound like much of a pack if you can only stand each other one week a month.”
The back of my neck felt like a hot water bottle leaked on it. I was a hundred degrees and sweaty. “You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?”
Akela’s manicured hands flew up. “Say what?” She acted mystified, but I wasn’t buying it.
“It’s too difficult to be farther from you. I get jittery if I’m too far away,” I mumbled.
“But what about your pack?” she continued to press.
“You know it doesn’t work without you. We just have our pledge to each other, but we’re not a pack until you decide to make us so,” I gritted out the words.
“Raff’s guys bunked together. They worked together and traveled around together,” was her snide reply. The little know-it-all apparently knew next to nothing.
I jerked the car to the side. My pulse sped up as I turned to face her. “Raff didn’t know who his fated mate was for over a decade though, did he?”
She backed up, those ocean-blue eyes widening at my tone.
“I’ve known, even though you have pretended that this thing was never real. You know it isn’t possible for me to stay away. So, yes! I live only a few fucking miles from your house, because you refused to acknowledge me! Yes, my pack is scattered! Because no one else wants to live this close to another big pack. It makes them edgy. But I had to! This was the only way to be near you. Had you ever once agreed to come to my home in all these years, this would not be such a damn surprise!”
My ragged breathing filled the car for several heartbeats. Those hypnotizing eyes of hers softened slightly. Her tongue moistened her pouty pink lips and my thoughts went haywire. I knew it wasn’t an invitation to taste her, yet it was all I could think of. My anger simply forgotten. This was her power she pretended not to be aware of. I was nothing but a puppet to her whims.
Delicate fingers reached up and stroked the side of my face soothingly. Her exhale, more of a sigh, was warm against my skin. I stopped breathing entirely. No one in my entire life had ever touched me so softly. When she dropped her hand, I felt its loss. “You are a complete paradox, Miles. I am utterly confused by you.”
Her befuddled expression caused me to smile. “Maybe if you stuck around long enough that wouldn’t be the case.”
Disgust ghosted her features. I expected it, but it still hurt to see scorn replace the moment of tenderness. “You are Machiavellian. Might makes right. Forcing me to shift with your pack or you hurt my friend. Take what you want and screw the rest. Don’t try to con me into thinking there are layers.”
I groaned as I put the car back into “drive.” I’d hoped this wouldn’t be yet another battle between us. My eyes skimmed over the little bag she brought with her and a pang of guilt sprung up at my actions. For a spilt-second, I considered asking if she needed anything from her house, but I couldn’t risk it. In Austin’s eyes, I was scum. Even if he knew she was my mate, there was a chance he would try to stop me from leaving with Akela. I was thirty-two years old and an alpha in my own right. I waited thirteen years for this woman to see me as her mate. I sure as shit wasn’t going to allow anyone to get in the way of that anymore, not Austin’s pack or Raff or his mate. Hell, not even Akela was going to stand in the way of the reality of the situation. There were only a few days before the change would happen and we were all going to be a pack when it was over. I would make sure of it.
Chapter Four
Twenty-One Years Ago
Unlike human kids, I looked forward to the end of summer every year. Other kids would complain about going back to school, but when you grew up in a pack, homeschooling was year-round. Either classwork or manual work every day were my only options. The last week of summer was the only real break we ever got. The packs would choose a different spot each year and we would come together in a big camping cookout.
Despite pack animosity, hundred-year-old feuds, and regional differences, the summer campout was always well attended. Almost thirty years before I was born, the Wa’ya started having issues. Less and less females were born, and out of those that were, fewer and fewer could make the change. Before, finding a mate and having a family meant not having to venture far. For the young men now, especially the alphas, this week was the only time they could find a mate. To keep us from going extinct, one week a year the Wa’ya tolerated each other. Sure, there were plenty of ways to still be nasty to the other packs, but that stuff was done quietly. Being evicted from the end-of-summer gathering could be a death warrant for a pack. Even my momma played nice. It was also the only time in the entire year I could see my little brother.
Tate just had a birthday in early August, he turned eight. I’d saved up enough money to buy him these trading cards called Pokémon. I didn’t understand how to play with them, and Dad would never let us watch the show when it was on saying the voices were too annoying, but I thought it would be something Tate would love. I overheard him talking to a kid last year about Japanese animation and how cool it was. It was something he watched with his new family. Alpha Austin had placed Tate permanently in his own sister’s home. Tate had a sister now and two young twin baby brothers.
I played off dropping him in the woods and meeting up with the pack to not rouse my momma’s suspicion. To her credit, she did go and look for him once we changed back. Had she shown any signs of grief, I might have come clean. Three days of searching the woods and both my parents just gave up. We no longer had an omega. It would be a burden to have a child too young to shift. I should have cried and screamed at them more when they stopped looking, made it look more believable that I also thought he was gone. When they saw Tate at the all-pack campgrounds the next year, my momma pinned me with a stare to peel the flesh from my bones.
I held my breath, wondering if she was going to storm over to Alpha Valentina and rip Tate from her hand. I think Valentina wondered the same thing. She looked to be holding onto both Tate and her oldest son Raff in a death grip. Tate was staring at me with his big brown doe eyes. I did what I had to do to protect myself from Momma.
“I guess they found the trash you left out, Momma,” I said, hoping she would see I was on her side, and praying Tate didn’t hear.
My momma answered with a dry, ugly chuckle. I may not have been found innocent, but showing my meanness won me her forgiveness. She ruffled my hair and turned and walked away. She still doesn’t ever make eye contact with Tate. Looks over his head if he’s anywhere nearby. Her actions were easy to read, even for a kid. Tate was dead to her.
I was hoping enough years had passed, that Momma wouldn’t watch my every move, and I could try to be Tate’s brother again. The birthday gift was my hope at a new start. I was so excited when we reached the campsite. I imagined handing over the gift and we could be brothers again in secret. I missed my best friend.
Dad had a pop-up camper that he hitched behind our Ford pickup. Me and my brothers would stay outside in sleeping bags at night, but we got to ride in the camper during the two-day journey here. It was softer to sit in than the truck bed, less muggy too. Pop was terrible at driving it, though. “Reverse” was his enemy.
After dad’s fourth attempt at parking, I hopped out while he cursed up a storm having just torn off part of a tree. Using the distraction, I slipped away to scout out where the other packs set up.
I heard Tate before I saw him. He laughed rarely, being a generally shy kid, but it was distinctive. The sound was a mixture of snorts and cackles. It was hard not to smile listening to it. I checked my back pocket and the box of trading cards was there. This might be my only time to catch him, so I wasn’t going to squander it.
At eleven, I was already five foot ten. Tate was still much smaller than me, but compared to the tubby toddlers that were squealing and running around a tree, he had grown quite a bit. I walked close by and whistled a tune we used to both love. Tate’s warm chocolate eyes searched me out instantly and a weary frown decorated his face. I made sure no one was looking and huddled up near a large tree that offered the best coverage. Tate stood still staring while the toddler boys attempted to climb on his legs.
“Hey,” his voice was pitched lower as he looked around anxiously. “What are you doing here?”
“Dad’s having a heck of a time parking the trailer, so I slipped away. I wanted to talk to you.” I looked down at the toddlers. “Those the twins you live with?” I asked.
Tate smiled at them fondly. “They act like they’re hopped up on sugar all the time, even though Mom is pretty strict with sweets.”
Something ugly and oily slithered in my stomach. “Mom?”
Tate rubbed the back of his neck and looked at me slightly defiant. “She told me when I was ready to stop calling her Aunt Marta, I could call her Mom.”
“But she’s not your momma.”
“Really?” Tate challenged. “Marta feels more like my mom than Momma ever did. She wants me, for starters.”
I should’ve let him have this. I wasn’t sure why it bothered me to see him happy. Except if they were his family now, what did that make me? “They aren’t Greys, though. Those Reds only want you because they know you are better than them.”
Tate snorted and looked at me closely with something that felt like pity. “There was a time you might have fit in better with Austin’s pack too. You liked to read and discover new things. Austin is a scientist.”
The truth was, I hadn’t been to the library since our omega left our pack. I’d been reading the same five books for the last four years. We had one computer for all of us to share, and only because Momma had to send in reports of our homeschooling. I usually didn’t get a turn on it till after midnight and there was never free time to read for pleasure.
