Luminous, page 22
Helen sighed. “I’d better show you where the carcass is, then.”
Evran rose to his feet and offered me his hand. “And then you’ll leave?” he asked Helen. “You won’t try to interfere?”
“I’ll consider it.”
It seemed that was the best we could do for now, so we followed her through the woods on foot for several minutes, until we came to the void. It wasn’t as large as the last one, but the body of whatever the Lusiri had killed was gone. It came back into view as the void shrank, something black and furry. A wolf maybe, or a bear.
“What if we’ve missed some?” I asked Evran as we headed back to our camp.
“We haven’t. Try not to worry.”
“But Helen’s right. We still don’t have a plan for how we’re going to stop Darius.”
Helen settled back onto her bedroll and cleaned her dirty fingernails with a splinter. “The answer seems obvious to me. If the Lusiri are capable of destroying the world, we need to kill them.”
“But Mina and Margana—”
“Are just two people. I know that sounds harsh, but are you really willing to sacrifice thousands of lives, maybe millions, for two?”
I was too shocked to speak, but Jean placed her hand on Helen’s arm. “If Darius had your mother, you wouldn’t be saying that.”
She dropped the splinter and folded her arms across her chest. “Maybe not,” she conceded. “But I still don’t see what choice there is.”
Evran squeezed my hand. “I’ll think of something.”
As much as I wanted to put all of my faith in him, if there was a solution to our problem, we’d have thought of it by now. And maybe I was being selfish, but I refused to consider Helen’s solution. I gripped the star pendant in my palm until it turned white-hot from my anger. My sister needed me, and I would not let her down.
Evran and Helen, who had spent enough time on the road to learn how to hunt, went off to find dinner while Jean and I gathered firewood.
“Can we trust her?” I asked Jean when they were out of earshot.
“As much as we can trust anyone,” she said, carefully arranging the fire. “She has serious reasons for hating Darius, too.”
“Does she know who she really is?”
Jean shook her head. “No.”
“Should we tell her?”
Jean tossed a small twig aside, considering. “On the one hand, I think she has the right to know. But I’m afraid if we tell her, she may act even more rashly if she encounters Darius. And that will be dangerous for everyone involved, including her. I won’t pretend to understand how royal succession works, but if she is the rightful heir, she needs to be protected. And it’s all the more reason for us to somehow find a way to stop Darius.”
I nodded and helped Jean place stones around the perimeter of the fire. We had enough on our plates without adding a banished princess to our list.
What I still couldn’t understand was how Darius could possibly have gone from being “like me” to like him. Could power corrupt a good person to that extent, or did there have to be some innate evil in a person to let it get to that point? And how could my powers of light and heat possibly become like Darius’s? He had to be mistaken. Maybe our magic was similar, but I refused to believe he’d ever truly been like me.
“It doesn’t mean you’ll be like that,” Jean said suddenly.
“What?”
“I’m sorry. You just...think loudly sometimes.”
I rubbed my arms against the chill. Whenever I felt sad or weak, my heat was nowhere to be found. So far only anger and love worked, and right now I felt neither.
Jean placed the last stick on her neatly assembled pile. “The fire is ready for you.”
I knew I’d never be able to summon the heat to light the fire, not with our situation so heavy on my conscience. “I’m not ready, unfortunately.”
She offered a sympathetic smile. “I can light it the old-fashioned way.” She pulled a chunk of flint and steel from her pocket.
I nodded for her to go ahead. “I’m just tired, I think.”
“It’s more than just being tired, Liora. You’ve been under a lot of strain. We all have.”
I moved closer to the quickly rising flames and wrapped my wool blanket around me. “Do you ever listen to Evran’s thoughts?”
“Sometimes. I can’t always help it.”
“Does he ever think about me?”
She stared at me for a moment, her gray eyes impossible to read.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t ask that. His private thoughts are his own.”
Jean sat back on her haunches. “It’s one thing for me to accidentally overhear someone’s thoughts. But it’s another thing to tell other people what they are.”
I looked away, ashamed. “I know.”
“So I’m only going to tell you this once, and I hope you won’t ask me again.”
My eyes darted back to hers. “I won’t. I promise.”
“Everything Evran does, he does for you. He always has.”
I wondered if I could melt from relief. A few snowflakes fell from the sky, evaporating instantly on my skin. Maybe Evran couldn’t tell me exactly how he felt, but then, I struggled with the same thing. And Jean had no reason to lie. “Thank you for telling me.”
“You’re welcome.”
A few minutes passed in silence. But as I stared at the flames, I remembered what Evran had seen when we touched before we went into the tapestry: me, a flame, and him snuffing me out. I didn’t know if I’d convinced him that his vision was wrong. And I didn’t know what he saw when he touched me now.
Jean smiled and placed her hand on my forearm. “He sees the candle coming back to life.”
TWENTY-FOUR
We reached Iverna too late.
It was a border town, with a population of permanent residents but more people passing through: fur traders and trappers coming down from the north, farmers coming from the south to sell the fresh produce that couldn’t grow here. There was gold in Tezhia, for anyone willing to brave temperatures well below freezing to find it and potentially lose their life to the monsters said to live on the other side of the mountains.
We arrived in the late afternoon, when it should have been bustling with life. But the city seemed almost deserted. We walked through quiet streets lined with houses and shops built from dark wood, their eaves and shutters painted blue, green, or white. Small silver amulets shaped like curved swords hung from many of the door handles. To guard against the evils from the north, Jean explained after listening to someone’s thoughts.
But the amulets hadn’t protected them from the Lusiri.
They had torn through the town early that morning, killing two people at the edge of a frozen pond. They’d been preparing to fish, according to the innkeeper of the white-trimmed inn we had decided to stay at, not least because it was the first one we found and we were all exhausted.
I stared at the stuffed white fox wearing a velvet waistcoat mounted behind the innkeeper’s desk while he checked us in.
“The White Fox,” he said, following my gaze. “The inn is named for it.”
Helen, who had taken the redheaded form she’d used in Corone, snickered. She had promised to leave first thing tomorrow morning, after she’d had a good night’s sleep and a hot meal. Jean said she was telling the truth, but people’s truths could change.
“Has a man called Darius been here?” Evran asked as he took the keys to our rooms. “He’d be traveling with a young man with black hair.”
“Not that I’m aware of,” the innkeeper said. He was short and compact, wearing a waistcoat similar to the fox’s. His fluffy white hair even resembled fur.
“Perhaps you can let us know if they come by. In the meantime, can you show us where the bodies were found?”
The man eyed us suspiciously. “I can’t leave the inn, but I can tell you it was near the large black willow on the far side of the lake.”
We thanked him and took our belongings to our rooms. We’d gotten four: one for Jean and me, one for Helen, one for Evran and Cyril, and another for Darius. Jean and I took turns washing ourselves with the pitcher of hot water the innkeeper provided. It wasn’t as good as the bath in Hander, but it was better than nothing.
I met Evran downstairs, and we walked around the lake together. It was our first moment alone since our kiss on the bridge, and despite the morbid task ahead of us, I was grateful for whatever time we could get.
I raised my collar against the cold breeze coming off the lake. “We were lucky Darius wasn’t here before us. I don’t know what we’ll do if we come across one of the holes in his presence.”
“We’ll get through it, just like we did before Darius went back to Corone. Together.”
I reached for his hand, smiling when he took it without hesitation. I kept thinking of what Jean had said, that Evran saw a candle reigniting when we touched now. I knew part of the reason Evran seemed more confident was that Darius wasn’t here. Without his looming presence, I had clarity. It was easy to see how evil he was, to believe Jean when she said I wouldn’t end up like him. But when he was near, there was a part of me that wanted to believe there was good in him, if only to prove that there was good in me.
The black willow tree was easy to spot. It had no leaves on its drooping branches and stood out in stark contrast to the white fields. The snow had come early this year, the innkeeper said, confirming what we already knew. I couldn’t help wondering if the Lusiri had something to do with it.
At first, we couldn’t find the void. The sun had broken through the clouds, turning everything a glittering white. “Hold on,” Evran said.
I watched as his shadow lengthened and stretched, until it was as wide as twenty men. In the shade, we spotted the hole almost immediately.
“How did you do that?” I asked in wonder. I’d seen him obscure himself, but I’d never seen him distort his own shadow.
He flashed a grin that reminded me of the mischievous Evran I’d grown up with. “Magic.”
“Very clever,” I said with a wry smile. But it was clever. I wondered what else he could do with his powers, particularly if he had a teacher, like Darius had said to me.
A chilling thought came to me, then. What if Darius thought he was mentoring me? What if his manipulation ran deeper than I realized, and by training me in my powers, he was ensuring I would end up like him?
Somehow, I managed to stifle that horrible thought, closing the void easily despite its size. But while before I’d been proud of myself for mastering my skills, now I had the sinking feeling that every time I did this, I was getting one step closer to Darius.
As if sensing my distress, Evran came to stand behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. We had dressed in nearly all the clothing we had to keep warm, and I resented the layers between us now. He laid my long braid over one shoulder and pulled my collar aside to kiss my neck, sending a shiver down my spine and my concerns skittering to the recesses of my mind.
With Darius coming, Evran and I might not have another moment alone together. I was going to do everything in my power to stay away from Darius, to not let his presence cloud my judgment. But right now, I needed Evran to know how much he meant to me. I turned to him, holding his hands firmly on my waist.
“You can’t put out my light,” I insisted. “You helped me control it when I couldn’t. But you won’t extinguish me.”
“Liora—”
“I love you, Evran. So very much. And I trust you, and I need to know that you feel the same way.”
“I do,” he said, his voice solemn. “I always have.”
I pulled back a fraction. “Then tell me.”
He smoothed my hair away from my face, his eyes clear and steady as they met mine. “I love you, Liora Duval. I love you, and I trust you.”
I had wished on the stars countless times to be like everyone else. I had prayed to be ordinary like my sisters, as content as Adelle and as free from worry as Mina. Every time I walked into Sylvan, I had willed the townspeople to look anywhere but at me. And I had dreamed of a world in which Evran could love me, despite the fact that I was different, despite the fact that I could never live my life freely.
But as our lips collided now, my light still flooding through me, I realized for the first time in my life that I didn’t want to be anyone else, even if I still didn’t understand my magic. I didn’t want to be anywhere else, even if we were standing at the edge of an abyss. Whatever happened next, we had each other, and that had always been more than enough.
We kissed until I felt water seeping into my boot and realized I’d melted a puddle around us. I smiled sheepishly. “Whoops.”
Evran laughed and scooped me into his arms, carrying me until we were free of the melted snow. “When this is all over, if everything works out somehow, will you come to Belasava with me?” he asked, gently setting me back on my feet. “I need a fresh start. There are too many bad memories for me in Sylvan.”
The fact that he wanted his fresh start to include me was everything I’d hoped for, until I remembered Margana. “But...your mother.”
“She can come, if she wants to. But the world is big, and I don’t want to spend all of it in one place.”
I grinned impishly. “I’d already decided I was going to Belasava when this is all over. So I suppose the real question is, will you come with me?”
Evran laughed and picked me up again, spinning me around in a circle. It was the happiest I could remember feeling in ages, maybe ever.
We spun and spun, delirious with joy, until I saw a dark figure from the corner of my eye. “Evran,” I whispered.
He slowed to a stop, both of us reeling a bit from the spinning.
“Enjoying yourselves?” Darius’s hands were thrust deep into the pockets of his fur coat. “How do you think this looks to the townspeople, seeing you two dancing around like fools right where two of their fellow citizens perished?”
Never mind that there was no one else out here. There was too much irony in his words to bother addressing them.
“Come,” he said. “I’ve brought supplies for the last leg of the journey. We need to discuss our strategy.”
Evran and I followed, our hands still clasped. Darius knew exactly what we meant to each other now, so there was no point in trying to hide it anymore. The sun had disappeared behind the mountains, and as I glanced up at the sky, I could have sworn I saw the moon and stars pulse brighter. I had burned my way out of an indestructible tapestry. I had called a star down from the heavens. Let Darius try to manipulate me. Let him see exactly what I was capable of.
We met Cyril and Jean in the fire-warmed parlor of The White Fox. Helen was nowhere to be found.
“Can I get you anything?” the innkeeper asked.
“Just be sure no one disturbs us,” Darius said as he put his booted feet on the low wooden table. The three hounds, which had returned with their master, were laid out on their sides, panting from the heat of the fire. “And bring us ale.”
“Yes, my lord.” The innkeeper winked at me as he left.
My eyes darted to Jean’s. Is that...?
Yes. I asked her to stay away, but she’s incorrigible.
Where’s the innkeeper?
I told her I didn’t want to know.
I shook my head and turned back to Darius. I’d known Helen was trouble from the first time I met her. It was a miracle she hadn’t ended up in prison with Mina.
Darius waited until he had all of our attention. “At this point, I think we can afford to lose a little time to the Lusiri. They’re in the mountains now, which won’t be a quick crossing with all this snow. And once they get to the snowfields north of here, they’ll slow down. We’ll take tonight to rest and organize. We leave at first light.”
The innkeeper returned with a pitcher of ale and five mugs. “Anything else I can get you?”
Darius glared at him with so much ire he squeaked. Knowing it was really Helen made it difficult not to laugh.
“So what’s the plan?” Evran asked. “How do we capture the Lusiri without getting killed in the process?”
Darius turned his glare on Evran. “Bait.”
“Excuse me?”
“There is no human prey that far north, only wolves and small mammals. If we provide the right bait, they’ll come to us.”
Evran tensed his jaw. “And just who are you planning to use?”
“Why?” Darius smiled with mock innocence. “Would you like to volunteer?”
“I’ll do it,” Jean said. “I’m the least important member of the party at this point, and it’s possible I can get into one of their minds. It’s worth a shot.”
I shook my head. “No. It’s too dangerous.”
“I already planned on using her.” Darius studied Jean with narrowed eyes. “She knows that.”
To anyone capable of empathy, it was obvious Jean was just pretending to volunteer to make the rest of us feel better. It was wrong that such a good person was being used in this way, when she had nothing to do with the tapestry. I sent her as much warmth and gratitude as I could.
But Evran’s gaze was full of burning hatred. “Leave Jean out of this. Use me instead.”
“No.” Darius’s tone brooked no argument. “We’ll need your shadow magic to hide the rest of us. Liora will use her light if things go wrong. And I need Cyril to transport us all to safety, if it comes to that.”
“And what will you be doing in all of this?” Evran ground out.
“I’ll be harnessing the Lusiri.” He pulled what looked like a standard horse halter—albeit a very large one—out of a sack at his feet. “Your mother wove it. It nullifies magic. Once I have it on a Lusiri’s head, it will be as docile as a lamb.”
