Alpha CEO, page 7
“Daniel, leave.”
“You sure?”
“You heard her, run along before I change my mind and show you what happens to little shits like you who try to take advantage of drunk, naive girls who have no fucking business being alone in the woods with you.”
“Julian—”
“Don’t fucking try me, Autumn. Not. Right. Now. Not with how I’m feeling.”
I felt each word beating into my back. He still hadn’t let go of me.
“Listen, I don’t want any trouble.”
“Then go!” I shouted to Daniel.
Finally, he nodded and left.
Julian didn’t waste any time, spinning me around to face him. “What the hell do you think you’re doing alone out here with that boy? What did you think was going to happen if I didn’t show up when I did?”
“We were just hanging out.”
“Kid, he was seconds away from lifting your skirt, pulling down your panties, and finger fucking you against the tree. Is that what you want for yourself? A meaningless fuck in the woods? You’re better than that.”
“You don’t even know me anymore.”
“Bullshit. I know you’re not the girl you mess around with in the woods.”
“You would know since you fuck anything that walks.”
He jerked back, stunned.
“Well, actually, you fuck anything that walks other than me. Me, you push away. Me, you forget. Me, you don’t even acknowledge. Newsflash, I’m not a little girl anymore.”
“Really? Then stop acting like one.”
“That’s your reply?! Are you for real?!”
“What do you want me to say, Autumn? I’m your brother’s best friend, and I’m saving your ass. If Christian had seen what I just did, if he knew you had been drinking, trust me, your ass would never be allowed to leave your house again.” He eyed me up and down with only craze in his gaze. “And trust me, sweetheart, I’m tempted to tell him, if this is how you’re going to be acting. Because of me, nonetheless.”
Each word that erupted from his mouth was another knife in my chest.
“And what about you?”
“What about me?”
“You heard me. What did you feel when you saw me? You still want my boyfriend standing?”
“Kid…”
“What? I want an answer! What did you feel? Do you ever feel anything when you’re with me? Do you ever think about me? Dream about me?” I knew I sounded like a child, but I couldn’t help it. Those questions constantly plagued me. I needed to know his feelings.
Right now.
“I’m not having this conversation with you.”
“Why? Because maybe, just maybe, you feel the same things I feel for you?”
“Quit fucking baiting me.”
“No!” The liquor coursing through my veins made it easier to ask him all the questions I wanted to know. “Tell me!”
“Autumn, stop! Don’t do this to yourself.”
“But you said I would always be your number one girl.”
“You are. But I can’t tell you what you want to hear. I’ll never be able to tell you what you need to hear.”
“Why? I don’t understand! Why do you look at every girl other than me? Why can’t you see me? Why can’t you look at me? Please, I just want you to look at me! Really fucking look at me! I’m standing right here! Telling you I’m in lov—”
“Don’t you fucking dare.” He put his finger out in front of him, silencing me. “What do you want me to say, Autumn? You want me to tell you that I wanted to rip him apart the second I saw him pull you into his arms as you made your way over to your brother? You want me to tell you that every time you wear that little uniform, I think about all the ways I could take you in it? Is that what you want to hear? What else do you want me to tell you?”
His expression turned heady, matching my own. Our stares tethered, and for a moment, I saw a certain vulnerability and uncertainty pass through him I could feel deep within my bones. However, just as quickly as it appeared, it was gone. His primal gaze disappeared, shutting off our connection and truths we briefly shared for just a few moments in time.
There he was, balancing on the thin line which had suddenly become us.
Me.
With a hard edge in his voice, he asked, “What do you think would happen if your brother knew what I just said to you?’
“I don’t care.”
“Well, I do. Your family has done more for me than anyone in all my life. I won’t fuck that up. Not even … for you.”
I jerked back, feeling the weight of his statement.
“I’m sorry, kid. I never wanted to hurt you. It’s easier like this. Me staying away from you.”
“Easier for who?”
“I’m not that guy. I won’t fight for you. I won’t choose you over them. I can’t. Please try to understand and stop trying to force my hand.”
I didn’t know which was worse—thinking he didn’t care about me or knowing he did but wouldn’t do anything about it.
“Do you think it’s been easy for me to push you away? Do you think it’s been easy on me to see you go from a little girl who used to follow me around and look at me like I was the answer to her little fairy tale? Do you think it’s been easy on me to know that I’m not? You’re not mine, Autumn, and you never will be. Stop trying to make me claim you because I won’t.”
I didn’t want to cry. I wouldn’t be able to stop.
It would consume me.
And it did.
I blinked, and tears fell down the sides of my face. I had never felt worse. Only adding to my tears and the hurt of his replies I so wanted to forget.
I wouldn’t.
I couldn’t.
Getting your heart broken for the first time was like having the wind knocked out of you by the force of a level five hurricane.
I wanted to die.
I felt like I was.
With the back of his fingers, he wiped away my tears. His flesh burned my skin, making me feel like maybe this was hell. The one I’d created for myself.
He held his head up higher, maintaining his strong composure. Every devastated bone in my body wanted to beg him to give me a chance.
To give us a chance.
Knowing it was no use. His loyalty didn’t stand with me—it stood with my family, and that was the hardest pill to swallow.
Wasn’t I his family too?
“You need to forget about me.”
“You say that like it’s so easy.”
“It should be.”
“But all I’ve ever wanted is you.”
“You don’t even know what that means, kid.”
“That’s not fair.”
“Life’s not fair.”
Neither one of us said anything for I don’t know how long until he tugged on the end of my hair.
“Let’s go get you some food, and then I’ll take you home.”
“Where’s Christian?”
“He left with Kinley. I told him I’d find you and make sure you got home safely.”
“Did you know what I was doing?”
“Something like that.”
“So now what? We go back to pretending you don’t notice me?”
He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. The expression on his face spoke for itself. It spoke volumes.
“Awesome. Thanks for nothing.”
I turned and left him there, ready to go break down in the bathroom at the arena of the rodeo. I didn’t realize we’d walked so far out to the woods. My heart hurt so profoundly I was surprised I was still breathing.
Head bowed.
My world tumbling around me.
Tears continued to cascade down my cheeks, and I bet I looked like a mess. Dark black mascara leaving lines on my face.
When it felt as if I couldn’t walk any longer, my legs giving out on me, I heard Julian loudly exclaim, “For fuck’s sake!”
I stopped and turned around at the same time he gripped onto the nook of my neck and slammed his mouth against mine.
He. Kissed. Me.
Julian kissed me.
I was shocked, confused, and overwhelmed. My eyes shut tightly, my breathing hitched, and my arms fell to my sides in defeat. All the sadness in me was gone. Feeling what I had wanted for so damn long. His lips were rough but smooth against mine. My heart drummed so fast, I swear he could hear it. My knees went weak the longer his lips stayed on mine. It was the most overpowering, mind-blowing, consuming emotion I’d ever felt in my entire life.
There would be no coming back from this. Ruining me for every other boy who might come along.
Reading my mind, he slowly parted his lips and pull me closer. Molding us into one person. I melted against him as I parted my lips, following his lead. Matching the same rhythm he’d set for me.
The second his tongue touched mine, I thought I was going to die. Right then and there, in his arms, with our mouths fused. I pulled back my tongue, and he took it as an open invitation to slide his into my awaiting mouth. Our tongues whirled in their own game of push and pull, turning this kiss into something more than I’d ever expected.
I wasn’t the only one losing my mind—Julian was getting lost in me too.
No words could come close to describing what was happening at that moment between us. The feelings he stirred deep within my heart matched my emotions with each stroke of his tongue. Feelings I didn’t think were possible to experience. Emotions I didn’t even think existed.
I never wanted him to stop kissing me.
When a soft moan escaped my mouth, he pecked my lips one last time before gradually pulling away from me. Leaving me breathless and wanting more.
Wanting him.
Incoherent thoughts ran rapidly in my mind while my eyes fluttered open. Leaning his forehead against mine, he gazed profoundly into my eyes.
“This was your first kiss, wasn’t it?”
I swallowed hard.
Eyes wide.
Heart open.
Love pouring out of me.
“Yes.”
“Fuck me.” I could hear the regret in his tone.
“Please … please don’t ruin this for me. Not now. Not after that.”
“Let’s go,” he growled, stepping away from me. “I need to get you home. Now!”
He was mad.
Pissed.
Fuming.
Except for this time, I didn’t care…
He loved me.
And with that first kiss, he declared war.
Chapter ELEVEN
—Autumn—
Day Two of Press Tour
I woke up to my cell phone ringing bright and early after tossing and turning most of the night. I ended up leaving Julian at the bar with his confessions unsure of how to proceed with it. My mind was spinning, and it didn’t stop for the rest of the evening.
For the first time in I don’t know how long, I dreamt about the first time he kissed me. The dream played endlessly throughout the night, annoying the hell out of me.
I didn’t open my eyes to see who was calling, groaning, “Hello,” into the phone.
“Autumn! How could you not tell me you leaked your own story?” Laurel questioned, and I yawned.
“What are you talking about? What story?”
“You didn’t tell me you had plans to do this. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I think it’s brilliant, but why didn’t you tell me?”
“Laurel, you’re speaking in circles. I don’t understand what you’re talking about. What story?”
“Your history with Julian. The world loves a second chance romance—they’re going to eat this shit right up.”
I shot up, sitting in bed. “Second chance romance, what the hell are you talking about?”
She knew Julian’s and my history. Of course, I told her. It was why she knew I could handle him, topping it off with the promotion to make partner once I had.
“Autumn, it’s all over the internet. Charles’ interview set the stage on fire.”
“Charles’ interview?” My heart dropped. “Oh my god.” Quickly, I grabbed my laptop off the nightstand, hitting the Safari button.
In less than a second, my whole world and life as I knew it was the headline of every news media outlet. Reading…
High Society Publicist, Autumn Troy, has not only taken Alpha CEO, Julian Locke, on as a client, but she has also claimed his cold, brutal heart. The two go way back—he was her first love. She was his. Can we say second chance romance?
All the blood drained from my face.
“That motherfucker! No, he did not tell Charles we have history! I’m going to fucking murder him! Do you hear me, Laurel? I’m going to jail because I’m going to fucking kill him!”
“Autumn, calm down. Is this not true? Have you guys not rekindled?”
“No! We haven’t rekindled shit. The only thing I feel like rekindling is my knee in his balls.”
“Oh, honey, this can work to our advantage, though. You need to calm down.”
“Laurel, I can’t—”
Beep.
I looked at my screen, Mom calling.
Deny.
Dad calling.
Deny.
Christian calling.
“Fuck!”
Definitely deny.
“I gotta go.” I hung up, searching Yahoo News and getting smacked in the face with a picture of Julian and me kissing on his bed. It was one of the last pictures he took of us.
“Oh. My. God. He even leaked a personal fucking photo!” Grabbing my phone again, I called Charles.
“Hey, Cherry. You’re welcome.”
“How could you do this to me? How could you publish an article without my approval? We had an agreement!”
“What are you talking about? I just made your client the most adored man in the world. Did you read the article? Did you see how he spoke about you and your relationship?”
“No! I didn’t read the article! I didn’t get past the fucking title, Charles! You blindsided me! And we’re not in a relationship—other than I’m his publicist, and he’s my client!”
“Umm… That’s not what he said.”
“He was lying! How you, of all people, couldn’t tell he was full of shit is beyond me.”
“So you guys don’t have a history? He wasn’t your first love?”
“It’s not as black and white as you’re laying it out to be.”
“Did you or did you not have a relationship?”
I wasn’t expecting his interrogation, feeling like I was suddenly on the stand at my own trial.
“If you could call it that.”
“So he wasn’t your first kiss? Your first sexual experience?”
My eyes bulged out of my head. “He told you that?!”
“I think you need to read the article.”
“I think you need to pray that I don’t find you and kick your ass!”
“Cherry—”
“Don’t you Cherry me! I’m so pissed at you I can barely see straight!”
“I didn’t mean to upset you, but he said you guys were back together.”
I rubbed my face. “I can’t believe you printed a bullshit article. If you would have sent it to me, I would have—”
“He said he wanted to surprise you.”
“Oh.” I paused, nodding. “He surprised me alright.”
“The good news is you’re trending across all social media platforms.”
“I’m done talking to you now.”
“Aut—”
I hung up on him, throwing the sheets off my body. I jumped in the shower and then got dressed, before I ran out of the hotel to meet Julian at his photoshoot with Vanity Fair, but the maid stopped me in the hall.
“Miss Troy.”
“Yes.”
“I’m so sorry to bother you.”
“I’m kind of in a hurry. Could we talk later?”
“This will only take a second. Mr. Locke insisted that I check your bed sheets yesterday morning. He said something about them being wet, and I told him they weren’t. They were perfectly dry. Was there a problem I need to know about?”
I scowled, the fury coursing through my veins making my face hot. The son of a bitch had the balls to confirm if I did or didn’t have sex.
The nerve of that man!
I bit my tongue. “There’s no problem. Thank you.” I rushed into the elevator, fuming on my way down.
My blood was boiling, and it didn’t simmer down the entire drive to the shoot. I walked into the building ready to spit fire, finding Julian in his dressing room.
Looking up from his phone, he smiled. “Good morning, Miss Troy.”
“Good morning my ass!” I slammed the door shut behind me.
“Is there a problem?”
“You bet your ass there’s a problem!”
“You need to watch your damn tone when you speak to me. You don’t have to yell. I’m sitting right here.”
“Julian, you’re lucky the only thing I’m doing is yelling at you and not punching you in the face!”
“Oh, so now I’m suddenly Julian again?”
“I’m going to fucking murder you.” I threw the article at him. “What the fuck is that?”
“It’s The New York Times interview I did for you,” he emphasized the last two words with a conniving grin. “You said you wanted me to be honest with the public. Share my past, my history, show them the man I used to be.”
“That is not what I meant, and you know it! You sharing your past has nothing to do with me.”
“But you’re such a big part of it.”
Ignoring his statement, I argued, “We’re not a couple, Mr. Locke. Why on earth would you lie about us?”
“Do I need a reason?” He nonchalantly placed his cell phone inside his suit jacket before leaning forward, setting his elbows on his knees. “I thought you wanted people talking? Rumors are the best publicity. Your words, kid.”
I glared at him. “Rumors for your announcement, not rumors for our relationship!”
“You didn’t specify, Miss Troy. But since you need a reason, how about this one? After your encounters with men yesterday, I decided to take matters into my own hands to prevent any future indiscretions playing out in front of me.”
