Chasing Temptation: Forbidden Series #7, page 4
I’m on the cusp of what I can only assume is my first ever panic attack when the door opens and a friendly looking nurse comes walking in. She’s slightly on the podgy side, her uniform clinging to her hips and arse a little too tightly, but she has the kindest face I think I’ve ever seen.
“Good evening, sweetie. I’m Shelly,” she whispers, noticing Quinn sleeping in the chair beside me. “How are you feeling?”
“Frustrated. When can I get out of this fucking bed?”
She chuckles at my irritation. “You’ll soon be up on your feet like it never happened.”
“Not soon enough,” I grunt.
“You remind me of my son. He’s just as hot headed.” She potters around, checking my vitals.
“Yeah? He must be pretty awesome.”
“He is. He also wouldn’t think twice about running in and saving the girl he loves.” Her eyes flick over to Quinn, and I can’t help but follow.
Her lips are now parted. She looks so peaceful, and I pray that whatever happened to her escapes her in her slumber. I know it hasn’t always been the case.
“She’s refused to leave your side, you know? We all thought we were going to have to get her scrubbed up to go into theatre with you.” She laughs. “Somehow we managed to convince her to let us see to her while they were working on you. You’ve got a good one there, boy.”
My heart pounds against my ribs. Is what she’s saying true? If it is, it makes my earlier concern seem a little pointless. Is Quinn just sticking around because she feels guilty that she dragged me into her mess, or is she really here because she wants to be? I guess only time will tell.
I fall silent, my mind wandering back to the events that put us both in here. I know I can’t remember everything, but his face is one thing I’m pretty sure I’ll never forget.
“Shelly?” I ask as she wraps a blood pressure band around my arm.
“Yeah?”
“Do you know what happened to the man who put me in here?”
“You mean the man you also put in here?” she jokes lightly. “I’m sorry, Joe. I’m not allowed to discuss other patients’ conditions.”
“He’s alive then. What a shame.” She gives me a weak smile, but if she knows even just a little of the detail around what happened, I can’t help but think she probably agrees with me. “There was another man too,” I say, thinking about Eddie being there.
“He’s fine. Sent home with nothing more than a butterfly stitch on his eyebrow.” I nod. At least someone got out of this unscathed.
Chapter Five
When I wake again, the lights are glowing above my head and Quinn is stirring beside me.
I watch as her eyelids flicker open and she stretches her neck, proving just how uncomfortable it must be sleeping in that chair.
“Morning, beautiful,” I whisper, not wanting to scare her seeing as she’s not looked up at me yet.
Her tired eyes find mine and my heart aches that she feels the need to put herself second right now. She needs to recover just as much if not more than me after everything she went through.
“How are you feeling?” She swings her legs from the chair and leans towards the bed so she can take my hand in hers.
“Ready to leave.”
A small smile curls at the corner of her lips, and I will it to continue. Seeing her wide, genuine smile would go a long way to making me feel normal right now. “You’re so predictable.”
“How’s that?”
“I told your first nurse I saw that I had a feeling you’d be a nightmare patient.”
“That’s harsh, Quinn. Whatever gave you that idea?”
“I just didn’t have you down as the kind of man who lies back and takes what’s coming to him.”
“Well.” A suggestive smirk plays on my lips. “That all depends on the situation, doesn’t it? I’d gladly lie back and take whatever you had to give me.”
Her cheeks heat and my cock stirs beneath the thin sheet covering me, despite my slightly broken body. “Joe, you can’t—”
“Okay, kids. Stop getting the patient excited,” Shelly says with a laugh as she wanders in with a tray of pills for me.
“I’m just going to use the bathroom.”
Quinn gets up and I panic, not wanting to watch her walk from the room. For the first time since I woke up, my body responds properly when I try to move, and I manage to wrap my fingers around her wrist before she gets away. Only, her response to my touch isn’t what I was hoping for.
She gasps and rips her arm from my fingers, holding it across her body like I just burned her. Her eyes fill with tears before she runs from the room.
“Shit. Fuck.” Throwing myself back onto the bed, my hands scrub down my rough face.
“She’s been through a lot, sweetie. Just give her a little time. Do you feel up to having a go at getting to your feet? If you are, we could get you into the shower.” The image her words conjure up are incredibly attractive because my skin feels disgusting, but I hate the idea of being forced away from Quinn longer than necessary.
“As long as we’re fast. I don’t want to leave her.”
Shelly smiles, biting back the words that are clearly on the tip of her tongue.
I don’t think I’ve ever truly appreciated being able to stand up, but after being in a bed for god knows how long, I’m really fucking thankful as my feet just about shuffle me towards the adjoining bathroom. The fact that Quinn didn’t come in here makes me worry even more about where her head’s at right now.
The short walk to the bathroom, even with Shelly supporting me, is the hardest fucking walk of my life. My stomach aches where the motherfucker stabbed me. I expect that but not for my legs not to work. It gives me a bit of a clue as to why they want me to stay here for a week. It also gives me even more of a push to prove them wrong and get out of here at the first opportunity. And when I leave, I’m walking out of those motherfucking doors with my head held high and my girl by my side.
Thoughts of Quinn running out minutes ago dampen my enthusiasm, but it’ll be fine, right? She’s here. Shelly said she refused to leave. She’ll come back to London with me. Right?
I hate that I’m feeling so insecure. Until this happened, I didn’t once question whether Quinn was in this as deep as I was. Yeah, I knew she was scared, but she never let me see that she wasn’t serious. She hasn’t now, but with her being home and the two men who were haunting her gone, I just don’t know what to think.
“Take a seat on there, young man,” Shelly says, walking us towards a little white plastic seat. I couldn’t be more grateful to get off my feet.
I moan in relief as the weight is taken off and I relax back, so exhausted I could probably fall asleep right here.
“Okay?”
“Yeah. Do your worst.”
“Lucky for you, I’ve got a gentle touch.” She winks at me and I can’t help but laugh. I regret it instantly, a sharp pain radiating from my wound and through my entire body. It’s all forgotten though when she pulls my hospital gown from me and a warm torrent of water cascades over my shoulder and down my arm. It’s fucking heaven.
“That temperature okay?”
“Incredible.” I let my head fall back and focus on the feeling of the last few days washing away, forgetting that I’m stark bollock naked in front of a stranger. To be fair, I’ve been naked in worse situations.
It’s over all too soon. Shelly helps me shave off some of the scruff covering my jaw, and when I eventually emerge, albeit slowly, from the bathroom, I feel like a new man. Well...one in more pain than he’d ever admit and who is about to pass out from exhaustion.
It’s not until I stop at the bed that I realise we’re not alone. Sitting in the chair, Quinn is waiting for me. My breath catches that she came back, and I really accept how afraid I was that she wasn’t going to reappear. A lump clogs my throat and my eyes sting. It’s not a feeling I’m very used to, but I’m so fucking relieved to see her.
“Quinn,” I whisper, too exhausted to even say her name out loud.
“You look better.” Her eyes hold mine as Shelly helps me back into bed.
“I’ll leave you to get some rest. Buzz if you need anything.”
“Thank you.” She nods at me and disappears through the door, leaving me alone with my girl. “Come here.” I’m surprised she hears me it’s so quiet, but after a beat, she lifts herself from the chair and just about manages to climb onto the bed with me.
She rests her head down on the pillow next to mine and our eyes hold. I’ve not got the energy to tell her what I want to, so I just have to hope she can read it in my eyes.
I’m desperate to reach over and pull her body to me, closing the inch of space she’s kept between us, but just as I think about moving my arm, my eyes fall closed and I’m lost to sleep once again. Who knew having a shower was such a fucking effort?
* * *
It’s late when I come to once again. Quinn is back in her chair beside me, my entire body aching with the loss of her next to me.
She must feel my stare because her head lifts from the book she’s reading and she graces me with a smile that makes my breath catch. It’s the most genuine one I’ve seen since we returned from our trip to Stratford-upon-Avon.
“How are you feeling?”
“Lonely. Where’d you go?”
“Just here,” she says with a laugh and shake of her head. “We haven’t all been knocked out by surgery and pain killers.”
“No but—”
“Not now, Joe. Not here.” Her tone is harsh yet cold, and I can’t help but agree. I’d also like to be somewhere a little more private to have that painful conversation.
“Good evening,” a male nurse I’ve yet to meet sings, walking into the room with a tray full of hospital food. “I managed to work my magic and get you two a little extra.”
“Thank you, Harry,” Quinn says, wheeling my little over-the-bed table thing for him to place it on. Clearly he’s been here before.
His eyes linger on Quinn just that little bit too long, and my blood starts to boil. “How are you feeling now?”
“I’m fine,” she replies unconvincingly. “It’s him we need fixing.”
“If you need anything, you know where I am.”
“Thank you.” The way she smiles at him makes me wonder if she knows him.
Harry drops the tray on the table and, after checking that I’m okay, leaves us to it.
“You know him.” It’s not a question.
“I do. I used to work with his mother. He was a student at Earlington, but that was long before I was teaching there.”
“I see.”
She sits forward on the edge of her seat, her eyes narrowing as they study my face. “Is that a little jealousy there, Mr. Kingsman?”
“What? No. I just thought he was a little overly friendly.”
She chuckles. “Whatever you want to tell yourself. Shall we see what delights we have tonight?”
“Can’t wait,” I mutter. Knowing what the other meals have been like, I’m not all that excited.
I poke at the casserole looking thing in front of me, but all I can think about is the way that nurse looked at Quinn.
“I was jealous,” I admit. “He looked at you like he knew you, and I hate that there are people out there who know you better than I do.”
“Joe,” she breathes, halting poking her own food around the container. “You are the only person who knows the true me. My real hopes and dreams. The version of me that lived here, that knew all these people, was a fake, an actress.”
“Why didn’t you get out sooner?”
She’s silent for a few moments while she thinks. “I’ve been controlled my whole life. It was normal. It was expected of me to just do as I was told. It took me longer than it should have to realise that that control wasn’t the love and care I thought it to be. I didn’t know any different. The people my parents associated with were the same, but as I grew up and started getting a look at the world around me, I realised my life was anything but normal. By then it was too late. I’d been married off to one of my parents’ friends’ sons who’d lived the same sheltered and controlled life I had, only he thrived on continuing it. The longer it went on, the more I resented it, but I was in too deep to just walk away. They wouldn’t allow that. I had to bide my time, continue to pretend to be her and just hope the time presented itself where I could live the life I’d been dreaming of.”
My heart bleeds for her that she’s been treated that badly for so long by people who are supposed to love and support her. I can sympathise to a point because my parents are worthless pieces of shit, but at least they didn’t keep me locked up. Her story makes mine sound like a walk in the park. Yeah, I’ve had hard times, really hard, but at least I’ve always been able to be myself.
“I love the person you are.” Her eyes fly to mine at my admission, but she doesn't say anything in response. I want to say more but when her eyes drop from mine in favour of the food in front of her, I get the message that she’s done for now.
We finish eating in silence before Harry comes back and does my check-up before leaving us alone once again. There are a million and one questions on the tip of my tongue. I’m desperate to unleash all of them on her to fully understand everything she’s been through, but in the end, I go with the most pressing.
“What happens when I get out of here?”
Her eyes meet mine and her lips part, ready to respond, but a knock on the door fills the room. She blows out a long breath. I’m not sure if it’s because she’s relieved or frustrated that she doesn’t get to answer, but the second a head pops into the room all thoughts of my previous question leave my mind.
The woman who comes to stand at the end of my bed is so familiar. Okay, so her hair is blonde, but the blue eyes that are darting between the two of us are the exact blue ones I’m becoming used to.
“Mum.” Quinn’s voice is so quiet I almost miss it.
“Lizzie. I missed you so much.” She walks towards Quinn with her arms open like she wants to pull her in for a hug, but Quinn stiffens, her tray remaining fully in place on her lap as if it’s a shield. “Lizzie?”
“Don’t,” Quinn snaps in a tone I’ve not heard from her before. “You don’t get to come in here after everything and act like all is well between us.”
Pain fills her mother’s face, and I can’t help but feel for the woman. She’s obviously gone out on a whim, hoping that her daughter might accept it. I can’t really blame Quinn; from the little I know it seems to be that her mother, although not guilty of committing any of the crimes of the men in her life, must have been aware of them.
“Elizabeth, please, just let me explain.”
“Explain? Explain how you sat back and allowed Dad and all the others to do what they did to those poor innocent kids? You could have done something about it long before I ever discovered it was happening, let alone before I worked at the same school. You could have—”
“I know,” her mother sobs. “I know. But…” she pauses, looking up at the ceiling like she’s praying for strength. “You know what your dad was like. You know how controlling he was. I just couldn’t risk—”
“You couldn’t risk what for all those children they were abusing on a weekly basis? What was so important to you that you couldn’t help them? Help me? You knew the kind of monster you were marrying me off too. You could have stopped that.”
“I just couldn’t. I was scared.”
“Scared? Scared of what?”
“Your dad,” she whimpers. “He may have never laid a finger on you, but it was a very different story for me. If I made one wrong move I’d feel it for weeks. I couldn’t risk exposing them and something happening to me. Where would that have left you? He might have...he m-m-might h-have touched you.” Her sobs become uncontrollable, but Quinn doesn’t move to comfort her.
I don’t know the woman from Adam, but even from here I can tell that she’s broken. Quinn might not want to hear her out, and that’s fair after everything she’s experienced, but I do believe there’s truth in her mother’s words. I’ve lived with manipulative parents who were only out for themselves, and I don’t think this shell of a woman before me is one of them. Her father, on the other hand, is probably up there vying for king alongside my father and Lauren’s. The reminder that all the women I care about have been screwed over by men who were meant to love and care for them has fury boiling in my veins. How hard is it to have a normal childhood with decent parents?
“Don’t turn this on me. I was strong enough to deal with whatever was thrown my way. The fact we’re all here right now should be proof of that.”
“It is, baby. I’m so proud of you.” Her face is red and blotchy and covered in tears and snot, her shoulders sagged in defeat, but still Quinn stands her ground.
“Why don’t you think about all those kids whose endless abuse has hopefully come to an end, and all those adults out there whose lives will always be touched by what Dad did and allowed to happen under his leadership?”
“You think I’ve thought of anything else over the years?”
Quinn fumes but doesn’t respond.
The silence is heavy with unsaid words. It’s only her mother’s lingering sobs that fill the space around us.
“Did you have anything else you needed to say?” Quinn’s voice is cold and harsh. It’s a million miles away from the soft woman I’ve fallen for, and I’m so damn hot for her right now. My cock swells beneath the sheets as she stands up against her mother, her eyes daring her to say something else.
I’m amazed that this strong woman before me endured everything she did for so long, but I do understand that bad situations aren’t always the easiest to get out of.
