Heroes Never Die, page 23
Stephanie’s face filled with resentment. Brian had deliberately set a trap for her, and she blindly stepped into it. “Dinner is in the oven,” she huffed. “Serve yourself.”
“I think I’ll drink my dinner.” Stephanie watched as he went to the kitchen. She could hear the refrigerator door bang open, and then the cracking snap of a beer bottle being uncapped. He walked out of the kitchen and brushed past her as though she were invisible, and headed toward the living room.
Stephanie felt the pangs of rejection. She covered her head with both hands, and tried not to cry. Why does love have to hurt so much? She went to the kitchen and removed dinner from the oven. It smelled putrid, like rotting fish, and she covered her mouth and convulsed with dry heaves. Tuna casserole. What was I thinking? When her stomach finally relaxed, she reached into the cupboard for a saltine and hoped she could hold it down. I never want to get pregnant again, she thought. But that was the least of her worries right now.
She went to the living room to find Brian. He was sitting in a chair gulping down a beer. He looked completely detached from her. I don’t know if I can get through to you, Brian, but I’m sure going to try. She sat down on the floor beside his chair and rested her head on his knees. She looked up at him, her face full of pain. “I don’t want to fight anymore, Brian. It’s tearing me apart inside. I want to get along with you, please.”
“Are you ready to tell me the truth?”
“But I already told you everything I can remember.”
“Forget it, Stephanie. I don’t talk to liars.”
Crushed, she just stared at him, her eyes filling with tears. She stood to her feet, wondering why she had ever bothered to make things right. “I never dreamed we’d let a broken arm come between us. I thought our marriage was stronger than that, but I guess I was wrong. I’m going to go soak in a hot bubble bath. I have a lot of things to think about.” His eyes jumped up at her. Then she went upstairs and drew her bath.
Stephanie lowered herself into the water and let the fragrant bubbles caress her skin, but she was too agitated to relax. She wondered if their marriage was coming to an end. It was the last thing she wanted. The thought terrified her. But fighting with the man she loved was even less appealing. She stayed in the tub, soaking, and tried to think of a solution, until her fingers looked like wrinkled prunes. She pulled the plug, climbed out of the tub, and wrapped herself in a soft towel. She stood in front of the mirror and brushed her hair, and then she put on her fluffy white bathrobe.
Stephanie pulled down the covers to get ready for bed. Brian walked in and approached her. She was too angry to look at him, and she thought about grabbing her pillow and going to the guest room to sleep.
“I don’t want you to leave me,” Brian said with an uneasy look in his eyes. “You know I can’t live without you.”
It was the last thing she had expected him to say. “You haven’t been able to live with me lately, either.”
Brian embraced her shoulders. “I pushed you too far, Stephanie, and I’m sorry. I won’t ask any more questions, and we’ll just leave it at that. You’re safe now, and that’s all that matters.”
“Are you sure, Brian? Because I don’t want to go through this again.”
“I’m sure.” He slowly untied the knot in her robe and pushed the robe off of her shoulders. Her robe gently slid to the floor. He laid her across the bed and kissed her. He paused for a moment and looked deeply into her eyes, “Are we good?”
Stephanie embraced his face, wanting him with all of her might. “We’re better than good.”
Chapter Thirty-Two:
Stephanie dressed for a baby shower that was being given in her honor. She put on a maternity dress and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She rubbed her hands over her enormous belly. I couldn’t look pretty if I tried. I’m tired of being pregnant. I can’t wait to get this over with. She carefully waddled down the stairs to find Brian. He stood to his feet when she approached him, partly out of respect, but mostly because she was too uncomfortable to lean over his chair to give him a kiss goodbye.
“All ready?” Brian put his arms around her.
“I guess so,” she said, trying not to complain but doing so anyway. “I feel so fat and ugly.”
“Hey, hey,” he quickly corrected, his eyes warm and sincere. “You’re not fat, you’re pregnant. And you’re far from ugly. You’re the most beautiful pregnant woman I’ve ever seen.”
“Oh, brother,” she groaned, knowing he was just trying to make her feel better. “I’m just anxious to get this over with. I’m tired of being pregnant.”
“Three more weeks,” he encouraged. “And when we see our baby for the first time, it will have been worth it. You’ll see.”
His enthusiasm was encouraging, and Stephanie’s eyes began to sparkle again. “You’re going to be such a wonderful daddy.” She reached for his mouth and gave him a kiss. “I’m just glad you’re going to be with me through labor. I couldn’t go through it without you.”
“I’ll be with you every step of the way,” he continued to encourage her. “I wouldn’t miss the birth of our baby for anything. And you’re going to do just fine. Now go have some fun at your party. I’ll have dinner ready when you come home.”
Her eyes filled with alarm. “Please don’t do that,” she pleaded, not wanting him in her kitchen. “The last time you made dinner we were scraping potatoes off of the ceiling for weeks.”
“How was I supposed to know you can’t mash potatoes in the blender?”
“I’m warning you, Brian,” she said as she turned to leave. “Stay out of the kitchen.”
“Are you sure I can’t drive you,” he called after her.
“And miss your football game? You really are a sweetheart. Enjoy your space, Brian. I’ll be fine.”
***
Stephanie returned from the baby shower exuberant. “Hi, Brian, I’m home.” She was anxious to tell him about the party. She found him in the living room. “The party was awesome, Brian. I had a wonderful time.”
“So did I,” he said with a strained smile.”
“Really? Did the Buckeyes win again?”
“Never watched the game. I had an unexpected visitor instead.”
Stephanie thought he sounded distant. “Anyone I know?”
“He said he was an old friend of yours.”
“A friend of mine?” She couldn’t imagine who it would be. “Who was it?” Brian looked up at her. She could see the contempt in his fierce stare.
“Dr. Rudy Lukens.”
Stephanie gasped. After all of this time, Dr. Lukens had come to deliver her message. “I can explain, Brian,” her voice trembled.
He jumped to his feet and yelled at her. “I begged you for the truth, and all you ever did was spoon-feed me lies. I’m not interested in any more of your bullshit, so save your breath. I already know that you became involved with the CIA while I was gone, which means you were seeing Kyle behind my back. And I already know you had a fraudulent marriage to King Hamid. I only want to know one thing – did you sleep with him?”
“Please give me a chance to explain,” she begged, knowing she had finally been caught in all of her lies.
“Answer me!” Stephanie’s eyes filled with water. She would lose him if she told the truth. “Answer me!” He demanded.
“I had to,” she blurted, unable to come up with another lie.
“That’s all I wanted to know. I’m getting out of here.” He bolted toward the door. “Don’t expect me back.”
“Wait,” she cried, trying to keep up with his pounding steps. “It’s not what you think. Please,” she desperately pleaded. “Please listen to me.” She reached for his arm to stop him from leaving, but he angrily pulled his arm away. She lost her balance and struggled to keep from falling. She stared at him, her eyes wide with horror.
“I have to get the hell out of here before I end up doing something I’ll regret.”
“Brian, wait,” she begged, knowing that she couldn’t stop him. “I don’t want to be alone in this house. You stay here. I’ll go to Dad’s.”
“Fine,” he mocked. “Run to Daddy. He’ll believe all of your lies. In his eyes, you can do no wrong. Just make sure you’re gone when I get back.”
Stephanie jumped when he slammed the door. Then she stood there in a daze, unable to believe that he had walked out on her. “Why now?” She finally questioned as she wrapped her arms around the baby in her stomach. “Dear, God, why now?”
***
Stephanie packed a few of her things and drove to her dad’s house. He came to the door to greet her, and she just stood there and stared at him, her eyes swollen with pain, her suitcase in her hand, looking like a lost child, frightened and begging for help.
“We need to talk, Dad,” she said as tears streamed down her face. “Something happened while you and Brian were in Turkey. It’s going to take some time to explain. Let’s go sit down.” Then Stephanie told him everything, from the very beginning to the very end, and Robert cradled her in his arms and let her cry.
***
Stephanie remained close to the phone in case Brian decided to call, but the phone never rang. She kept hoping that he would show up at the door, wanting to work things out, but toward the end of the next day she gave up hope. She stood in front of the picture window and stared outside at nothing while she wondered how much more she could endure.
Robert walked into the room. “Just say the word, Stephanie, and I’ll go talk to him.”
She turned to face him. “I don’t want Brian back because you pressured him into it. He has to come back on his own. And let’s face it – that’s not going to happen.”
“He’s angry, Stephanie. He needs time to cool down.”
She wasn’t so sure anymore. “Then why isn’t he missing me the way I’m missing him? I feel so lost and empty without him.”
“Don’t you think he’s the one you need to be telling that to? Go on, Stephanie,” he encouraged. “Go talk to him.”
“He won’t listen to me. He thinks I’m some sort of two-headed monster.”
“Interesting dilemma,” he posed. “If I were you, I would just give up and call it quits.”
“Excuse me?” She had never heard him say those words before. It surprised her. Then she caught on. “Oh, I get it. You’re challenging me.”
Robert’s wise blue eyes were firm. “Sometimes you have to fight for what you want. If you want Brian back, go fight for him.”
Stephanie thought about the pain she would feel if Brian rejected her. Making the first move was a big risk, especially when she felt that her emotions were already battered. But she wanted him back more than anything. “I love him, Dad. I’m willing to fight for him, but I don’t think he feels the same way. Keep your fingers crossed for me, will you?”
“You’ll be fine, Stephanie. Brian needs to resolve this as much as you do.”
“While I’m gone,” Stephanie reminded him, “don’t contact Kyle. If he ever finds out I told you about the operation, we’re all dead.” Her heart grieved when she saw the anger in his eyes. She was asking him to go against everything he believed in, but he was holding his temper for her sake. She tried to reach her arms around him, but her belly was in the way. “I love you, Dad. We’re going to get through this.”
Robert squeezed his eyes closed. “We always have, and we always will.”
***
Stephanie tried to open the door to her house, but it was locked. She fumbled in her purse for the house key, but Brian unlocked the door before she could find it. His eyes filled with hostility as soon as he saw her. “What are you doing here?”
“I want to talk, Brian.”
“Not interested.”
“Please,” she begged. “I miss you.” She had to come up with a better reason if she wanted inside. “I need to get some more clothes anyway.”
He stepped aside and let her come in. “Make it quick.”
She had hoped for a warmer reception. The only thing they seemed to have in common now was the baby. “We need to resolve this, Brian. Our baby will be here any day now. I need you. The baby needs you.”
“You have your nerve coming here and using that baby to get to me. If I had known everything you did behind my back, there wouldn’t be a baby right now.”
Stephanie’s eyes filled with pain. “What are you trying to say – you want a divorce?”
“You haven’t figured that out yet?”
Her first impulse was to break down and cry, but she was determined to stand and fight for what she wanted. “You can forget about it, Brian. I’m not giving you a divorce. I came here to talk, and you’re going to listen.”
“The hell I am.”
“Shut up and listen,” she yelled, trying hard not to crumble. “From the moment you left for Turkey, my life was threatened. Kyle Robertson involved me in a plan to lure King Hamid out of his country so that he could be assassinated. He told me if I didn’t cooperate, he would kill you.”
Brian burst out laughing. “That’s a good one, Stephanie. Before I go to bed tonight, I’ll check underneath it to make sure there are no men in trench coats waiting to get me.”
“Don’t mock me, Brian. I was frightened. I had to cooperate. There wasn’t any other way.”
“You’re so full of it. No one threatened you. And even if someone had, you could have made a run for it, simple as that.”
“That’s not true. Kyle said he would find me. I was forced to stay with him. I couldn’t run away. He trained me…”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” he interrupted. “Back up. Are you trying to tell me that while I was over in Turkey fighting my ass off to stay alive, you were over here living with Kyle Robertson, your former fiancé?”
He was twisting everything she said. “I wasn’t ‘living’ with him. I just stayed with him. I didn’t have a choice. I’m trying to tell you that I was set up.”
“Sure you were,” he scoffed. “I think I can figure out the rest on my own. Let’s see – you slept with some king, and you spent God only knows how much time with Robertson. So tell me, Stephanie, did you sleep with him, too?”
Stephanie’s first impulse was to strike his face. She stepped up close to him and spit her fiery words. “How dare you accuse me of sleeping with Kyle! He was unbelievably cruel to me. And to think I honestly believed that you would protect me. But Kyle was right about you,” she fumed. “You’re nothing but a goddamned coward.”
He immediately retaliated. “And you’re nothing but a goddamned whore.”
Her mouth dropped open, then her wounded eyes filled with water, and she just stared at him, gasping for her breath, knowing she had lost him forever and knowing she didn’t give a damn, either. “You can have your divorce,” she seethed. “Because I don’t want anything else to do with you.” She turned and headed for the door.
On her way out she noticed their wedding picture on the stone mantel. She picked it up to admire it one last time. She looked at their happy faces and remembered how wonderful it felt to be so alive and on fire with love. Then she remembered how Kyle had smashed their picture while vowing to break up their marriage. And just as Kyle had done, she threw the picture across the room, smashing it to pieces. Kyle had won again.
***
Stephanie pulled into her dad’s driveway and stormed through the front door. Her dad met her at the door. “No luck, huh?”
She was still hot with anger. “Brian wants a divorce, and so do I. It’s over, and I’m glad.”
Robert scowled with unbelief. “You don’t mean that. You and Brian need to work this out. Have either of you stopped to consider your baby?”
“Brian doesn’t care about me or the baby,” she recklessly yelled. “So you’re going to have to fill in for him when I go to the hospital. I didn’t get pregnant by myself, and I’m sure as hell not going through labor by myself.”
“Stephanie,” he said, his voice wavering with concern. “Brian needs to be with you when your baby is born. He loves you. He’ll be there.”
“Oh, really?” she objected. He was still holding onto hope when there was none. “Well, I don’t want him near me. He hurt me beyond repair. He called me a goddamned whore, and that – that I can handle, but I will not tolerate being treated like one.”
“All right, that did it,” he stormed. “I’m going over there right now.”
“No!” she yelled. “You don’t have to run to my rescue. He’s not worth the gas it takes to drive over there. It doesn’t matter anymore anyway. It’s over. All I want now is to have this baby, and then I’m going to get the hell out of here before anyone comes looking for me. And that’s exactly what I’m planning to do.” She turned and headed toward the stairs.
“Stephanie!” He called after her. She stopped on the first stair and listened without turning around. “Come here, sweetheart.” She stubbornly refused by shaking her head, trying her best to be strong. “I know you’re hurting. And I’m here for you if you need me. You and me – we’re a team.”
“Oh, Dad,” she cried, unable to hold back the tears any longer. She went to him and fell into his outstretched arms. “It hurts. It hurts so bad.”
“I know.” He tried to cradle her in his arms without pressing her baby belly. He brushed her soft hair with his strong hand. There was nothing he could do or say to ease her pain. “I know.”
Chapter Thirty-Three:
Stephanie slept through the first phase of labor until a contraction lasting almost one minute woke her with a painful jolt. She looked toward the nightstand and checked the time on the clock so she could establish a pattern between the intervals of pain. Her back was aching and she moved into another position to make herself more comfortable. She had another strong contraction ten minutes later, but this time she couldn’t find a comfortable position. She was scared and she wanted Brian there to hold her. She looked at the phone, wanting to call him, but she couldn’t handle another rejection. The sooner she accepted that their marriage was over, the sooner she could go on with her life. She had already been to hell and back. Living without Brian wouldn’t be any different. She could survive without him. She waited until her contractions came with more frequency, and then she went to her dad’s bedroom and sat down upon the bed beside him. “Daddy,” she gently called to wake him. “It’s time.”
