Some Like It Spicy, page 22
But Xolani wasn’t even listening to her friend. Her mind was still circling over the words that Barry was moving to Germany. Her body acted before her brain even finished processing the information and forced her to her feet.
“I have to go.” Xolani grabbed her jacket and purse from the back of the seat.
“Go where?” Anika asked, “Aren’t we supposed to_”
But Xolani was already walking. “I’ll call you guys later.”
26
BARRY WAS INCREDIBLY DISAPPOINTED THAT Xolani hadn’t agreed to date him. His only consolation was that she’d admitted to liking him and hadn’t rejected him outright. Even so, he wondered what would’ve happened if he’d said what he really wanted to say.
‘Like’ was a woefully inadequate word to describe how he felt about her.
Love was more accurate.
He loved Xolani. Of that, he was sure. However, while making his confession, he’d seen the wariness in her eyes. It left him with the impression that if he threw the word ‘love’ out there, she might bolt. So, he’d settled for ‘like’.
As it turned out, even ‘like’ was too much for her!
Last night, she’d been withdrawn after their conversation, and lost in her thoughts. In the morning, she barely spoke to him, and even turned down his offer to drive her to work. She said that it was because she needed to visit a dealership, but part of him suspected that she was avoiding him. The other part of him was quaking with fear.
He was terrified that he’d ruined everything with his confession. He’d almost begged her to forget everything he’d said the previous night, and considered telling her that he was still okay with their situationship. The only reason he didn’t was because he knew he’d be lying to both of them.
He wasn’t okay with how things were with them. He was dissatisfied with being friends who occasionally got naked together. He hated being introduced to other people as just her friend. He was tired of taking her out on dates but pretending that it was just a meal between friends.
He wanted more.
He wanted security, commitment, and exclusivity. He wanted to stop worrying that someone might snatch her from him because their relationship was undefined. He wanted to claim her as his in front of everyone, including their coworkers. He wanted to be able to flash the ‘I’m taken’ card to all the women who bothered him and not be lying about it. He wanted her to be his and his alone, just like he was hers and hers alone.
But more than anything, he wanted a future together.
They might start as boyfriend and girlfriend, but he could see them getting married, living together, having kids, and growing older together.
He wanted all that, and more.
But this wasn’t just about what he wanted.
Xolani’s wants mattered too, and at the moment, she was confused about what those wants were. To keep himself from pressuring her into doing something she wasn’t ready for, he decided to retreat to his own home. That would give her the room she needed to think without guilt, and give him the space to lick his wounds.
He expected the break between them to last a couple of days, maybe even a week. He certainly didn’t expect to get a call from the estate’s security desk the very same day, letting him know that Xolani was on her way to his house.
Already? She’d already made her choice?
He didn’t know whether to be excited or terrified. His stomach was knotted with tension, and his heart was beating so fast it felt like he was on the verge of a heart attack. He fervently hoped that she’d decided to date him. But what if her choice was ‘no’? Where did that leave them? Did that mean that it was over between them? Would he have to let her go?
The drive from the main gate to his house usually took five minutes, but he was too nervous to wait that long. Before the five minutes were up, he walked to the door. Because he didn’t want her to know just how desperate and anxious he was to see her, he didn’t open the door. Instead, he watched the intercom screen and waited for her.
His camera had a perfect view of both his driveway and his doorstep. So, he saw Xolani’s car drive in, saw how she rushed from the car and raced to his doorstep. His heart almost stopped when he saw her expression. She seemed both furious and on the verge of tears.
“Barry. Barry Hale.” She pounded on his door like a one-woman SWAT team. “Open this damn door, you bastard. Open this door.”
What had he done to make her so angry?
Driven by alarm, curiosity, and fear in equal measure, he yanked the door open. As soon as he did, she pounced on him. Glaring at him furiously with eyes that were filled with tears, she pushed him into the house.
“You heartless, inconsiderate bastard!” She slammed the door closed behind her then came at him again. She smacked his chest with both hands. “Are you kidding me? Why did you ask me to date you if you plan on leaving?”
The force of her smacks had him staggering backward. “What the hell, Xo?”
“Don’t call me Xo.” She tried to smack him again, but he captured both her wrists. “Don’t call my name when you’re planning to leave me.”
“What?” he panted while trying to keep her flailing hands from escaping his grip. “What are you talking about?”
“Don’t act like you don’t know.” Scowling fiercely through falling tears, she demanded, “What was the plan? Were you going to make me love you then ditch me? Is that it? Is that what we’re doing now?”
Barry had no idea what she was going on about, but her tears went straight to his heart. Before he knew it, he’d released one of her hands.
“Don’t cry.” He grasped the side of her face with one hand and stroked his thumb across her cheek to wipe away her tears. “Why are you crying?”
“Don’t do that.” She pushed his hand away. “Don’t console me when you’re planning to break my heart.”
“What are you talking about?” He let go of her other hand too so he could cup her face with both hands. He kissed her forehead. “I’m not planning to break your heart.”
“Liar!” She pushed him back into the wall. “You’re a damn liar.” Unexpectedly, she moved toward him, wrapped her arms around his waist, and buried her face into his chest. She sobbed. “Don’t leave!”
The swift switch-up from hitting and cussing him out to hugging and pleading with him was incredibly jarring. Furthermore, he was still confused about what they were fighting over. Even so, he wrapped his arms around her back and held her tightly.
He soothed. “I’m not leaving.”
“No, you’re not.” She declared between sniffles and while clinging to him like he was a lifeboat and she was drowning. “I’m not letting you go.”
“Okay, I won’t go,” Barry agreed while caressing her back. “I’m not going anywhere. So stop crying, okay?”
She lifted her head to meet his gaze. Her face was tear-streaked, but her eyes held a hopeful glint. “You’re not just making empty promises, right? You won’t leave, right?”
“I won’t leave,” he confirmed even though he had no idea where he was supposed to be going.
“I’m serious. Please don’t go.” Her expression and tone were fraught with panic. “I know Mercedes is a great opportunity, and it’s incredibly unfair to ask you not to go, but I don’t care. You can’t leave me. How am I supposed to live without you? You can’t go. I promise I’ll make it up to you. I’ll date you. I’ll marry you. Whatever you want. I’ll love you like no one else has ever loved you. I’ll make sure you never ever regret staying. Just don’t leave.”
Her passionate declaration was as unexpected as it was thrilling. The disappointment he’d felt the previous night disappeared like chaff in the wind, and his heart soared with happiness. What she was offering was even more than he’d asked for, but definitely everything he wanted.
“Please, you can’t leave.” Xolani clung to him desperately as she met his eyes. “I love you too much to let you leave. Don’t leave.”
That damn near knocked him off his feet. His world stopped rotating and his whole body stiffened in surprise.
She loved him?
Xolani loved him?
If he wasn’t looking right at her as she made the confession, he would’ve assumed that he was hallucinating. But the earnestness and sincerity in her eyes made it clear that she’d said exactly what he’d heard.
She loved him.
A strange light feeling started in his chest and went on to fill his whole body. If he had wings on his feet, he would’ve been on cloud nine.
“I love you too,” he declared before lowering his head to place a firm kiss on her lips.
It was almost as if Xolani had been waiting for that kiss because she easily melted into him. She rose on tiptoes and her arms went up to surround his neck even as she deepened the kiss. Her lips moved sensuously over his, and her tongue snuck out to meet and tangle with his.
Happiness merged with desire to create a heady cocktail that had him yanking her closer to his body so that they were practically glued together. It was a pity that he couldn’t tattoo himself on her body, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t try. He held her tightly while he ferociously kissed her.
He could taste her tears as they kissed, but that didn’t faze him. He would kiss these and any future tears away. She’d already promised him forever, and he planned to make sure she kept that promise.
When they finally came up for air, they were both panting. Though Xolani had stopped crying, her face still had tear tracks and her lips were swollen. But to Barry, she still looked as beautiful as ever. He came back down for another passionate kiss.
As they kissed, he lifted her in his arms and carried her bridal style to the living room. He sat down with her on his lap as they tempted each other with more kisses.
When they took another break, he rasped, “Just out of curiosity, where was I supposed to be going?”
Her brow knotted in confusion. “Huh?”
“You kept talking about me leaving,” he reminded her. “Where am I going?”
“Don’t act like you don’t know.” She hit his chest lightly. “You’re supposed to go to Germany.”
“Germany?” Frowning, he pointed to himself. “Me? To do what?”
“To work for Mercedes-Benz.” She gave him a disbelieving look like she was surprised that she had to explain it to him. “Stop playing with me. Why are you acting like you don’t know?”
“I’m not acting. I really don’t know.” He was even more confused than when she’d barged into his house. “Since when do I work for Mercedes-Benz?”
“Since_” Xolani started then stopped. She canted her head to study Barry. “Didn’t you meet their scout today?”
“I did,” he readily admitted.
“Then why are you pretending like you don’t know what I’m talking about?” Xolani recited, “He offered you a job, and you took it.”
This was news to Barry and his face showed it. Not hiding his surprise, he denied, “No, he didn’t.”
“What?”
“I think there’s been some miscommunication.” Barry explained, “There was no job offer. At least not today.”
Xolani’s heard jerked back and her voice rose to a squeak. “What?”
“Aaron – the scout – offered me a job at Mercedes the same time Rayburn did. I declined because Rayburn offered me a better deal,” Barry explained. “But afterward, Aaron and I became friends. He’s in the city, and dropped by today to see me. As a friend.”
“Wait… so… he didn’t…” Xolani blinked rapidly like she was still trying to process what he was saying. She grabbed his forearm tightly as if it was an anchor that she was using to keep from drowning in shock. “But people in your department say… There was a handshake.”
It didn’t take much more for Barry to understand what had happened.
He gently scolded, “This is why you need to stop listening to the rumors from EV. They’re never accurate and always exaggerated.”
“So, you’re saying you’re not_” Xolani gaped like a fish out of water.
“No.” He finished the statement for her. “I’m not leaving. I was never leaving.”
She gasped and cupped her hands over her mouth. “Oh my God.”
His mouth slowly curved in a smile as delight swooped in. “So you ran over here because you thought I was leaving?”
“N- no,” she stuttered, her expression like that of a deer caught in the headlights.
“You ran here because you wanted to make me stay?” he asked. It was a rhetorical question. He already knew the answer.
“I- I said it’s not like that.” She leapt from his lap and dashed toward the hallway.
Barry wasn’t expecting her to make a run for it, so it took him a while to react. By the time he got to his feet and started chasing, she’d already opened the front door. But he caught her before she made it to her car.
Barry was grinning like an idiot as he grabbed her arm. “Why are you running?”
“I’m not running,” she denied while breathing harshly like a sprinter who’d just completed a race. While trying to jerk her arm out of his grip, she said, “I just need to go home. I forgot that I have an important_”
“Uh-uh.” He yanked her to him then hauled her right over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. “You’re not going anywhere.”
He wasn’t an idiot. Of course he knew that her running was because she was embarrassed that she’d overreacted. If he were a better man, he would’ve saved her from her embarrassment and let her go. But, as she’d aptly put it when she’d unceremoniously barged into his house, he was a bastard.
“Put me down, Barry,” she demanded, swinging her legs in an attempt to get out of his hold.
He didn’t even bother answering. He slapped her ass to still her movements before carrying her back into the house. Once they were in the living room, he dumped her on the couch.
“I’m leaving,” she insisted while trying to sit up.
“You’re not going anywhere.” He pushed her back to lie down then came over her. “We still have things to discuss.”
“We’ve got nothing to discuss,” she insisted while determinedly avoiding his eyes. Clearly, she was still mortified. If her skin was a lighter shade, she would be beet red.
Xolani’s shyness was incredibly cute and made him love her even more. He bent to place a soft kiss on the tip of her nose. “So you love me, huh?”
“Wh_ what?” Xolani blustered while her eyes darted everywhere and nowhere. “No.”
“You can’t deny it.” He grabbed her chin and turned her face until she was looking right at him. “You already said it. I heard you.”
Panic suffused her expression, and she sounded breathless as she said, “Forget about it. I was distressed. I was babbling nonsense.”
“So you lied?” He arched his eyebrows. “You don’t love me?”
She didn’t answer for a good five seconds. She just stared at him until he started to think that she would never admit it. But then she sighed her surrender. “Okay, fine. You win. I love you.”
Even though getting that confession from her was like pulling teeth, he was infinitely elated. He pressed a fast hard kiss to her lips. “No, we both win. I love you too.”
Her bottom lip jutted out in a pout. “You’re just saying that because I said it.”
“Did I scam you in a previous life?” he teased with a chuckle. “Why don’t you ever trust me?”
“I trust you. I really do,” she immediately asserted. “It’s just… I didn’t expect to feel this way, and I didn’t think that you also felt the same.”
“Now you know. I love you, Xolani, more than I can even explain.” He’d never thought of himself as poetic but the words flowed from him like they’d just been waiting to be released. “I thought I knew what love felt like before, but I didn’t. Nothing I’ve experienced before can compare to what I feel for you. It feels like my heart was always empty and I didn’t even know it. Now that you’re here, I feel incredibly full and complete. You’re the piece I was missing.”
“Oh, Barry…” she breathed, her lower lip quivering. “Do you really mean all that?”
“With all my heart,” he assured her. “But that doesn’t mean that I’ll force you to be with me. If you still have doubts about me and need time to_”
“I don’t need any more time.” She cut him off. Her arms came around his neck and she declared, “Let’s date.”
“Are you sure about that?” He reminded her, “Last night_”
“I was being dumb and focusing on the past rather than the present.” She lifted her head to kiss his lips softly. “I was just scared and grabbing at any excuse I could find to keep from committing. But when I heard you were leaving, I realized that I couldn’t bear not being with you, that I need you in my life. I won’t let fear guide me anymore. From now on, I’ll just focus on loving you and shutting out the noise.”
Relief and happiness swept through him, bringing a smile to his face. He couldn’t have asked for sweeter words if he’d penned them himself. Still, her previous concerns weighed on him. He wanted her to come into their relationship without any fear or distrust. He wanted her to be sure that he was all in and that his heart, soul, and body all belonged to her and her alone.
Gazing at her solemnly, he vowed, “I promise, you’ll never have to worry about other women taking my attention. You’re the only woman I see, the only one I want.”
“You’re the only man I want too.” She smiled, truly smiled, the kind of smile that made his heart skip and cartwheel. “I love you, Boyfriend.”
“I love you too, Girlfriend.” His lips came down to meet hers in a poignant passion.
The kiss was tender and ardent, yet it felt different somehow. It was richer, deeper, sweeter, and uninhibited. There was no restraint in it; just pure love, trust and need. It made his heart soften and melt.
When her hands began to move over his body, he returned her touches with urgent yet tender touches of his own that sought to show her just how much he loved her. In that sea of kisses and touches, they made their way upstairs to his bedroom, leaving a trail of clothes in their wake.
