The Comeback, page 36
She shows me, and every member of the band has posted the same image as Jihoon in solidarity, and each already has likes in the hundreds of thousands. “Newlight is screwed,” she crows. “This is unbelievable. StarLune is finally taking control.”
I nod, barely listening. That this is unprecedented is clear from the comments, and I’m scrolling so fast, I’m accidentally liking posts when my fingers tap hurriedly on the screen.
“Check that email,” Hana says. “Check it right now.”
I do. There’s another message.
Ari—I miss you.
“Tiger flowers,” I murmur, thinking about the video. “He talked to me about them.”
“They’re Jihoon’s birth flower,” Hana supplies.
“He mentioned it.”
“Did he tell you the meaning?”
I shake my head and swipe at my eyes. “He’d only told me the meaning for primrose.” Loveliness.
“Please love me.” She grabs my hand, hard. “That’s what tiger flowers mean. He’s told two million people he’s in love with you.”
Fifty
The alley. The background to the livestream was familiar for a reason. I know the place because I took Jihoon there myself. He’s not in a Canadian-looking neighborhood of Seoul. He’s here, in Toronto.
“I need to go,” I blurt. Then I don’t move, looking between the door and the screen. Do I want to do this again? I said in my email that I didn’t know how to get back to what we were, and Jihoon’s given me a path. I want to take it but am unsure if I have the guts.
“Hey.” Hana’s voice is quiet. “You know there’s no limit to happiness, right? Like no happiness police that will take everything away if things are going too well.”
I make a face at her. “Of course I do.”
“I don’t think so.” She pauses as if collecting her thoughts. “You don’t act like it. When things go your way, you never celebrate. You always look for what can go wrong as if the light’s too bright when you’re happy and you need a cloud to make you comfortable.”
“I’m not…” I can’t finish the sentence.
“It’s okay to want to be happy with another person,” she says. “It’s scary to not know what will happen and how someone will react. You’re a good person, Ari. You won’t be able to fuck it up too bad if you’re honest.”
“Thanks?” Hana’s not always the best at pep talks.
“Now get your man.”
“Right.” This is what I want, and I’m going to grab that thread he’s offering. I marshal my courage and throw on some unstained pants. There’s a cab right outside, and I hop in. “Queen and Portland.”
When I arrive at the empty alley, I start searching. I don’t remember the tiger flower painting at all, and the murals change, so I don’t even know if it will still be there. I walk slowly, looking at the images of gates and faces and cats until I find it by an open garage, so vibrant and gorgeous, I don’t know how I missed it when I was with Jihoon.
It takes up a full door, and I step closer to see each of the petals is a stylized tiger outlined in red.
“Ari?”
My head snaps up because Jihoon is standing behind me. He didn’t leave. He stayed until I could come after him. I now know I would have gone to Seoul to find him again but this is way more convenient.
I rub my cold hands together because I forgot my gloves. “Hi.” As openers go, it’s not great, but cut me some slack.
He doesn’t move. This is terrible. Shouldn’t he be throwing his arms around me or kissing me passionately? The movies told me that’s what happens after the grand gesture.
The grand gesture, which oh my God, he did. The ball’s in my court. I talked feelings with Phoebe. I hugged my Dad. I can do this. I’m going to Jihoon this and lay it all out. Writing that email was easy compared to this. I’m nauseous, and my legs are trembling. I’m scared, but I have to stop the bleeding.
“I get why you made your choice,” I say. “It hurt me because I thought I mattered to you but you let Newlight just…do that to me. Then you wanted to erase who I was to you.”
That is without a doubt the hardest thing I have had to say. I can’t have hope without vulnerability, so I push on. “I really liked you. I fell in love with you.”
Nope, that was the hardest. Almost done, Ari. Keep going.
“You told me to trust you, and I did. You said you’d fix it, but you stepped on my heart and crushed it. It was probably karmic payback for what I did to you at the airport, but it was awful. Really awful.”
There, it’s out.
“You said you wanted us to find our way back to what we were,” he says.
“You read the email.”
He nodded. “I couldn’t help but hope you’d written, so I kept checking despite promising myself not to. Were you being truthful?”
I nod and look up to try to prevent the tears from falling. “I was.”
“I’m not sure we can go back to that,” he says. “The past is over, and those people are a little wiser now.”
I take a breath. “Then we don’t go back. We move forward.”
“You would do that without knowing what’s to come?”
“Yes.” No hesitation.
Jihoon stuffs his hands in the pockets of his puffer jacket. “I’m leaving StarLune. We’re disbanding.”
“What?” This isn’t what I thought he’d say.
“After you left, I had to face what I’d done. StarLune has been my life for a decade, and I love it, but the band is my past, and you can be my future.”
“You can’t leave the band,” I say. “It’s too important to you.”
“We made the decision together. StarLune is made of people, and those four people will always be with me. That’s why we posted the same photo on our social media. We have others planned to show we support and love each other.”
“All of you?” I eye him hesitantly.
“Yes. We all need this. You are not wrecking StarLune.”
“The internet will say I am.”
“We’ll tell our fans the truth, that we’ve talked and the cracks have been there a long time but none of us wanted to be the first to say it. We need to grow in our own ways.” He looks at me. “I want you to be part of that journey. If you’ll have me.”
I take a half step forward, and it’s enough for him to cover the distance between us and wrap me in his arms. His mouth is on mine before I can answer, but the kiss tells him what he needs to know.
I’ll have him.
He encloses me in his puffer jacket, wrapping it around me until we’re in a bubble. “I love you, Ari. When you sent that text in Seoul, I was almost bursting to tell you how I felt, but I wanted to tell you in person.”
“Really?” Since I still sometimes woke at night regretting that message, this is a relief.
“Yeah.” He breathes into my hair. “It turned out to not be an opportune time.”
I grin despite myself. “This is definitely a more suitable occasion, but you should say it again to make sure.”
“I can do that.” He kisses the corner of my mouth. “I love you.”
“Good.” I make him wait until he’s fidgeting, then rub my nose on his warm neck. “I love you, Jihoon. And Min. I love all of you.”
His heart pounds, matching mine. “Thank you,” he whispers.
“What’s next?” I murmur against his mouth.
“I don’t know.” He pulls me closer to shelter me from the cold. “What do you think’s next?”
“I don’t know, either.” I don’t have a goal. I don’t have a plan.
That’s fine, because Jihoon’s arms are warm, and he’s smiling only at me.
Discover more from Lily Chu
Epilogue
Hello, this is Newlight Entertainment.
We have some news about StarLune. Although we have negotiated, as of April, StarLune—Kay, Min, DeeDee, Sangjun, and X—will no longer be artists under Newlight Entertainment. Newlight strongly denies any bad faith actions or wrongdoings in the song credits of its artists.
To all the Starrys,
This is StarLune. You might have seen the announcement from Newlight Entertainment and we wish to give you more details about why we ended our contract ahead of time. Although we are disbanding, all the members of StarLune remain close friends and are eager to support each other in our future careers as we grow as artists and individuals. This was a choice we made as a team, as we have always made our decisions.
We stand by our comments regarding the deceptive songwriting credits and cannot stay with a company that doesn’t respect our artistic contributions. Jihoon and Daehyun are proud of their work and each other. We apologize with all our hearts for misleading Starrys and hope you will forgive us.
Jihoon will take a hiatus from performing to continue in his songwriting career and music production. He will be making a new home outside Seoul, creating the music he loves.
Daehyun will focus on music production and will also make music to bring joy and light to fans.
Sangjun and Xin are proud to announce the launch of StarRise Entertainment, where artists are treated with freedom and respect. Global auditions for artists of all genders will begin soon.
As the first signed artist with StarRise Entertainment, Kitae will be launching a solo career with a new album due in several months. Please give him your love!
For all your love and support over the years, we thank you from the bottom of our hearts. You were always the stars lighting the path through our night sky.
Kitae, Jihoon, Daehyun, Sangjun, and Xin
“Are you coming?” Phoebe pokes her head in my hotel room. “We have time for a coffee by the water before the meeting.”
My role at Luxe has transformed since I started almost a year ago. My tours have been such a success that I’ve been put fully in charge of their development. We’re getting another lawyer—not Brittany—to do the luxury group travel contracts. This is my last one to negotiate, and Phoebe is here to introduce me to her Maltese contact. She moved back to Montreal in June, so I don’t see her as often as I’d like, although we text most days.
“Almost ready.” I pull on my usual disguise, a hat and sunglasses. The chances of being recognized here in Malta are slim, but I’ve had enough run-ins with the media and StarLune fans to be cautious.
Life has been, as Hana calls it, an absolute gong show but in a wonderful way. “Turns” charted in multiple countries, which gave a euphoric Jihoon the confidence he needed to commit to his songwriting path. Min of StarLune’s romantic gesture to his alleged and now disproven stalker caused a media frenzy that I don’t think I could have survived on my own. Jihoon brought me to Seoul, which offered much better security, and held my hand through the entire situation. Newlight was zero, possibly even negative, help, but the rest of StarLune supported us publicly and privately, as did idols from other groups. The furor grew when Jihoon explained the story on a livestream, right from the moment we met to the false statement, to an audience of over six million viewers.
“I should have said something to clear her name sooner, and that’s on me. I’m grateful to have Ari in my life and that her heart was big enough to forgive me,” he said, looking at the camera. “My hope is that you are all able to find the same joy we bring each other.”
There are people who don’t like it, but that stream reassured most of the fans who truly did want Jihoon to be happy and caused a backlash against Newlight. When Xin announced he was seeing someone, it was accepted almost immediately. They’re a cute couple.
In any case, gossip about StarLune’s relationships was instantly overshadowed by the announcement of StarLune disbanding. Some Starrys held vigils outside Newlight and accused me and Xin’s partner of breaking them up. The band fought back hard. My time in Seoul means that I know all Jihoon’s friends well now. It bothers him a bit to know that Kit and I will never be buddies, but he’s satisfied we respect each other.
In fact, it was Kit who turned the tide about StarLune’s disbandment when he laid it out in a message to their fans. He was honest and emotional as he described how proud they all felt to love and encourage each other as they sought new paths.
“Being part of StarLune was beautiful, but it’s time for a new era,” he said, staring into the camera earnestly. “No one can be the same as they were a decade ago. You aren’t and we aren’t either.”
Then, he took a long silent look at the comments, which made me laugh with how weird it was to watch Kit read the screen to himself as millions viewed him breathlessly. Jihoon, who was watching it with me, nudged me in the side. “Quit it,” he said.
“Sorry.”
Kit spoke again. “StarLune is over, and it’s no one’s fault. We’ve always known it would never last forever, and we’re grateful we could close the band on our own terms. We love you, and we love each other. Please let us grow to be the men you helped us become.”
Jihoon beamed with pride and posted the clip on his social media with a line of hearts, stars, and moons. Now that they were out of their contract, Jihoon and the others took great pleasure in checking in with former Starrys and encouraging those who were having bad days, a personal interest that helped fans adjust. Newlight’s CEO getting involved in a financial scandal didn’t hurt either, and their continued denials about forcing Jihoon and Daehyun into pretending about the songwriting credits—which included leaked emails threatening to cancel the group’s debut if the two members didn’t play along—was one of the final nails in the company’s coffin.
Now, months later, most of the controversy has died down, allowing the former members of StarLune to make waves in their new chosen paths and me to travel to Malta with my sister.
“Let’s go,” Phoebe says, and we step out into the Valletta streets. The bright sun reflects off the light stone of the city, and I pull my hat farther down, already sweating in the fall heat.
“You hear from Jihoon?” she asks as we go down a flight of steps.
“He called earlier,” I say. “They’re done with Kit’s new EP, and he took two of Jihoon’s songs.”
Jihoon had been in Seoul for the past week working with Sangjun and Xin’s new company. As well as signing Kit, StarRise has two rookie groups debuting in a few months, and Jihoon loves spending time with them. I went by the studio with him once and was struck at how gently he treated these kids who idolized him. StarRise is determined to give the trainees a supportive environment, and Jihoon is happy to drop in with advice when he can.
He’s also making a name for himself with his own songs and continues to collaborate with Daehyun, both thrilled to have the freedom to talk about their work with their fans. Daehyun’s last song was for a girl group who hit the U.S. charts for the first time. He called us at three in the morning when he found out, and we popped champagne right there for an impromptu transpacific celebration.
Phoebe points to a small alley. “We can take a shortcut here. You leave tomorrow, right?”
I nod. Jihoon is leaving Seoul to fly into Paris, where we’ll do some shopping (him), visit some museums (me), and climb the Eiffel Tower (both). We’ve also sent our hiking gear ahead to Saint-Jean-Pied-de-Port, where we’ll start walking the Camino de Santiago. We only have a few days, but we can always come back to where we left off.
My phone buzzes with an alert: Jihoon and Ari Super Awesome Getaway. It’s the calendar invite Jihoon sent from my living room last year, but now it’s been updated to say: Jihoon and Ari Super Awesome Getaway. The first of many. I love you.
Jihoon has added a new selfie in the notes section. It reads, Always thinking of you, Ari.
I blow the selfie a kiss and step out of the alley to a view of the ocean, the city ringing the harbor like a partial corona. Phoebe grins at me. “Not bad, huh?”
I smile back at her. “It’s perfect.”
And right now, it is.
Acknowledgments
It was another year of very interesting times. Which means, for many of us, it wasn’t great.
You might have found solace in knitting or baking or playing board games. I found it in K-pop, and The Comeback is the result of consuming hours and hours (and hours) of content that made me truly happy. I loved writing this book, and I hope you enjoyed reading about Ari, Jihoon, and Hana. And if you’re intrigued and looking for starter playlists, check my website: lilychuauthor.com.
As always, many people contributed to this book. Mistakes are always my own, though!
My agent, Carrie Pestritto, who is a hugely supportive human.
The fantastic editor team of Allison Carroll from Audible and Mary Altman from Sourcebooks. I’d also like to thank the Audible and Sourcebooks teams for all their work.
My first readers helped shape the book: Candice Rogers Louazel, Allison Temple, Farah Heron, Jackie Lau, Rosanna Leo, and Yen Conrod Tran.
Graci Kim, who not only provided excellent comments but also generously provided sensitivity feedback and was kind enough to answer questions about Korean food to etiquette to everything.
Thank you also to the lawyer who answered my questions about their firm under the strict understanding they would remain absolutely anonymous.
My biggest thanks and all my love go to Elliott and Nyla, who are my favorite people.
PS: You might wonder if Jihoon and StarLune are based on any specific idol or band. They are not. I swear!
About the Author
Lily Chu lives in Toronto, Canada, and loves ordering the second-cheapest wine, wearing perfume all the time, and staying up far too late reading a good book. She writes romantic comedies with strong Asian characters.
You can learn more at lilychuauthor.com and @lilychuauthor.
Thank you for reading this Sourcebooks eBook!
Join our mailing list to stay in the know and receive special offers and bonus content on your favorite books and authors!
CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP
