Like a Wildfire, page 19
Thoughts of the Scotsman are pushed to the back of my brain as I focus on relaxing and having a few beers with my best bud. The ache of needing someone in my bed is overwhelming me.
I walk up the deck and give him a wave through the window. Wade has a smirk and an easygoing strut about him when he answers the door, telling me he’s relaxed and happy to see me. He’s dressed in loose-fitted jeans and a dark t-shirt, the ink on his hands and forearms sparking thoughts of a certain Scotsman.
[Wade] “Evenin’, boss.” He says, gesturing for me to head inside.
[August] “Evenin’.” I reply, giving him a slight grin as I shuck off my boots and hang my hat on the peg. “Finally got that horse settled for the night?”
[Wade] “Yeah.” His sigh is full of relief. “Zeus gave us quite the run for our money, but we got him squared away. For now, anyway.” He shuts the door and heads to his kitchen, pulling out two beers from the fridge, and handing one to me. “That horse has to be wild. Reminds me a bit of you when you were younger.”
A random memory of him daring me to do something, and me doing it without hesitation pops into my head making me chuckle.
[August] “Now that’s a terrifying thought. Hopefully, he’ll calm down after a bit of training.”
We take a seat on the old leather couch in the living room, a fire crackling the in hearth given the early October nights dip in the low thirties. It’s not a roaring fire, just one big enough to take off the chill. We nurse our beers, the weight of the bottle in my hand feeling great after a long day. The foreman’s cabin is cozy, not too far from the main house, but just far enough to feel like a world of its own.
Wade leans back and rests an arm along the top of the couch.
[Wade] “So, how was the trip? That game was a nailbiter.” he asks, glancing at me with a relaxed smile.
I sip my beer, allowing the cool liquid to ease my throat.
[August] “Yeah, it was somethin’ alright.” I grin as memories of the trip flash through my mind. The breathtaking landscapes of Scotland, the bustling streets of London, and of course, Patrick and all his stubbornness. But I pushed him aside. “It really makes me wanna bring some Highland cows onto the ranch, you know? Those things are incredible.”
Wade chuckled, shaking his head. “Only you would go to another country and come back wantin’ more cows. But I’ve gotta admit, those shaggy beasts are pretty cool.”
I grinned at him, but I could sense the shift in the air, the unspoken tension that had been hanging between us for a while now. It had been a long time since we’d sat like this, just talking, catching up after a hard day’s work.
Wade’s voice grew softer, more serious. “I’ve missed this, you know? Missed relaxin’ with you after a day like today. Feels like old times.”
I nodded, the words striking a chord deep within me. “Yeah, I’ve missed it too. We should make it a point to do this more often.”
Wade’s gaze lingered on me, his eyes dropping to my lips. I noticed the way he stared, and the tension in the room grew thicker. My heart rate picked up a bit, and I felt that familiar, unsteady feeling in my gut.
[August] “Wade,” I started, a little unsure, “why are you looking at me like that?”
He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he put his beer down on the coffee table and, with a sudden movement, he leaned forward, pressing me back into the couch with his body. His lips were on mine before I could process what was happening, his kiss full of the kind of passion we used to share.
For a moment, I let myself get lost in it. I felt the ache inside me, the one I’d been carrying around since I got back from Scotland, ease just a bit with Wade’s lips on mine. I craved this—contact, intimacy, something to fill the void that had been gnawing at me.
But then, something wasn’t right. As Wade deepened the kiss, it hit me like a punch to the gut. This wasn’t right. Wade wasn’t Patrick. His touch wasn’t the one I longed for, his kiss wasn’t the one that haunted my thoughts every night.
I pulled back abruptly, breaking the kiss and pushing Wade off me. My breath came in short, uneven gasps as I stood up, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand as if trying to erase the kiss. My mind was reeling, my emotions a tangled mess.
“I can’t do this,” I blurted out, my voice shaky. I felt a surge of guilt and shame wash over me, knowing that I’d let it happen. Even though Patrick and I weren’t in a relationship, it felt like I was betraying him, betraying myself.
Wade looked up at me, confusion and hurt flashing across his face. “August, what—”
But I didn’t let him finish. I couldn’t. I ran a hand through my hair, feeling more defeated than I had in a long time. “I’m sorry, Wade. I just… I can’t do this.”
Without another word, I turned and stormed out of the cabin, leaving Wade sitting there alone. The cold night air hit me as I stepped outside, but it did little to cool the fire raging inside me. I was angry—at myself, at the situation, at everything.
But more than that, I was heartbroken. Because I realized in that moment just how deep my feelings for Patrick ran. Wade might have been my first love, but Patrick… Patrick was something different, something more. And I couldn’t pretend otherwise anymore.
As I walked back toward the main house, the night swallowing me up, I knew one thing for sure—I needed to figure out what the hell I was going to do about Patrick. Because I couldn’t keep going on like this, torn between the past and the future, between what was and what could be. Something had to give, and I was terrified of what that might be.
CHAPTER 22 – PATRICK
The pub was unusually quiet, the kind of slow day that leaves you alone with your thoughts. I leaned against the bar, absentmindedly wiping down the already clean surface, lost in memories of August. It had been weeks since he’d flown back to Wyoming, and the void his absence left was impossible to ignore.
Gran was sitting in her usual corner, knitting something intricate. She had a sixth sense about these things, always knowing when something was weighing on my mind. I glanced over at her, and she looked up, her sharp eyes meeting mine.
“Come here, lad,” she called, patting the seat next to her. “Sit with yer old Gran for a bit.”
I sighed, setting the cloth down and walking over to her. She set her knitting aside, her gaze soft but probing.
“Ye’ve been moping around like a lost pup, Patrick,” she said bluntly. “What’s goin’ on in that stubborn head of yers?”
I chuckled lightly, though it felt hollow. “Just… thinking, Gran. About August.”
Her eyes twinkled with understanding. “Aye, I’ve noticed a change in ye since he came into yer life. He’s stolen yer heart, hasn’t he?”
I nodded, feeling the weight of her words. “Aye, he has. But he’s back in Wyoming, and I’m here. It’s… it’s complicated.”
Gran leaned back in her chair, her fingers tapping thoughtfully on her knee. “Love is always complicated, lad. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it.”
I sighed again, running a hand through my hair. “I just… I don’t know what to do. I miss him, Gran. Every day. But he has his life there, and I have mine here. How can we make it work?”
Gran gave me a knowing look. “Ye’ve taken some time away in Scotland, haven’t ye? To clear yer head?”
“Aye,” I admitted. “But it hasn’t made things any clearer.”
She smiled gently. “When ye know yerself, ye’re in tune with yer goals, yer dreams, yer truth, and most importantly, yer heart. When that happens, ye’re complete. Have ye thought about what makes ye truly happy, Patrick?”
I stared at her, her words sinking in. “August makes me happy,” I said quietly. “Being with him… it’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before.”
Gran nodded, a satisfied glint in her eyes. “Then why are ye hesitating, lad? What’s holdin’ ye back?”
I shook my head, frustration bubbling up. “Fear, I suppose. Fear of the unknown, fear of what could go wrong.”
“Ah, fear,” Gran said, leaning forward. “It’s a powerful thing, but it shouldn’t control ye. Think about what ye want, Patrick. What’s yer wildest dream?”
I closed my eyes, imagining a life with August. Working together on his ranch, waking up beside him every morning, sharing both the hardships and joys of life. The thought filled me with a warmth I hadn’t felt in a long time.
“I want to be with him,” I whispered. “I want to be a part of his life, and have him be a part of mine.”
Gran’s smile widened. “Then go after it, lad. Don’t let fear stand in yer way. Ye deserve happiness, and if August is what makes ye happy, then ye need to take that chance.”
Her words were like a balm to my troubled mind. She was right. I had to face my fears and take control of my happiness. Sitting here, doing nothing, wasn’t going to change anything.
“Thank you, Gran,” I said, feeling a newfound determination. “You always know what to say.”
She patted my hand affectionately. “Ye’ve got a good head on yer shoulders, and ye’ve got people who care about ye. Don’t let fear stop ye from going after what ye want.”
CHAPTER 23 – AUGUST
_ Harry Houdini _
Wade and I are out on horseback, the familiar rhythm of Rebel’s stride beneath me is soothing as we prepare to check fence lines in the furthest pasture where we’ll be moving the cattle to. Wade’s riding just ahead on his horse, Benny, the man and horse in perfect sync, like they can communicate on a spiritual level. My horse Rebel and I have that as well. We can make magic happen.
[Wade] “Sheesh. Looks like a group of deer came plowing through here.” Wade says, pointing to a spot where the fence is mowed over with tuffs of light-colored hair strewn throughout it. “Oh yeah, they did a number on this section. I can go back and grab a new post and supplies and have this done today.”
[August] “We can get to it tomorrow.” I reply, though my mind is wandering, not really focused on the work at hand. It’s been like that lately—my thoughts always drifting back to a time that feels so long ago now.
Just as I’m about to nudge Ranger forward, my phone buzzes in my pocket. I pull it out and see “Momma” flashing on the screen. My heart skips a beat. Momma doesn’t usually call unless it’s important.
“Hold up, Wade,” I call out as I answer the phone. “Hey, Momma, what’s up?”
“August, you need to get back to the house quick,” she says, her voice tight with urgency. Panic grips me like a vise.
“Is it Pappy?” I ask, my voice rising in fear. Pappy hasn’t been feeling good the last couple of days, and my mind immediately jumps to the worst. “Is he okay?”
There’s a brief pause, and Momma’s voice softens, though there’s still that edge of urgency. “Just get back here, son. Now.”
“I’m on my way,” I say, and hang up before she can say anything else. My heart is pounding as I turn to Wade, who’s already urging Bear toward me.
“Something’s up,” I tell him, my voice clipped with worry. “We gotta get back to the house.”
Wade doesn’t hesitate, just nods and spurs Bear forward, and I follow suit, urging Ranger into a fast gallop. The world around me blurs as we race back across the pasture, my thoughts a tangled mess. If something’s wrong with Pappy...
We reach the house in record time, and I pull Ranger to a halt, the sudden stop making dust swirl up around us. My eyes catch on an unfamiliar car parked in the driveway. I frown—who the hell would be visiting at a time like this?
Wade dismounts first and grabs Ranger’s reins as I slide off, my boots hitting the ground hard. My heart’s in my throat as I turn toward the house, expecting the worst, when suddenly, a man steps off the porch.
I freeze, my breath catching in my chest.
Shaggy copper hair, a familiar smile, and a blue and green kilt—the sight nearly knocks the wind out of me.
Patrick.
He’s really here, standing in my driveway on Schuster Ranch like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
“Hey, cowboy,” Patrick says, his voice warm and just as I remembered.
I blink, trying to process what I’m seeing. “Hey, Scotsman.”
I’m moving before I even realize it, crossing the distance between us in long, eager strides. Patrick mirrors me, and then we’re crashing into each other’s arms, the world fading away as I bury my face in the crook of his neck.
His scent, his warmth—it’s all so real, so grounding. I can feel the tension that’s been coiled tight in my chest for weeks finally start to unravel.
“I missed you,” I breathe into his ear, my voice thick with emotion.
Patrick’s grip tightens around me, his hand pressing firmly against my back as if he’s afraid I might disappear. “I missed you too, August. More than you know.”
We pull back just enough to look at each other, our faces inches apart, and without thinking, I lean in and capture his lips in a kiss. It’s soft at first, a gentle meeting of mouths, but it quickly deepens, all the pent-up longing pouring out into this one moment.
By the time we pull apart, both of us are breathless, and I can hear my family’s voices behind me. I turn slightly, still holding Patrick close, and see Momma, Duke, Eli, and Presley standing on the porch, their eyes wide with surprise and curiosity.
“Patrick, this is my family,” I say, my voice a little shaky as I make the introductions. “Momma, Duke, Eli, Presley—this is Patrick.”
Patrick gives them a warm smile, the one that always makes my heart skip a beat. “It’s a pleasure to meet y’all,” he says, his Scottish accent thickening just a touch.
Momma steps forward first, a soft smile on her face as she pulls Patrick into a hug. “So you’re the one who’s been keeping my boy’s heart,” she says, and there’s a knowing look in her eyes when she pulls back. “Welcome to the family, Patrick.”
“Thank you, ma’am,” Patrick replies, looking a little flustered but pleased.
Eli and Presley offer nods and handshakes, while Duke gives him a once-over and a grin. “Well, this explains why August has been so distracted lately.”
“Duke, hush,” Momma scolds, but there’s no real heat in it. She turns to me, her eyes twinkling. “Duke, go take care of August’s ranch chores. He’s taking the rest of the day off, per my orders.”
“What for?” Duke grumbles, though there’s a playful edge to his tone. “I already did my share.”
“Because I said so, that’s why,” Momma retorts, her tone brooking no argument.
I usually would protest—there’s always too much to do on the ranch to be taking time off—but for once, I’m actually thrilled to take a break.
“All right, all right,” Duke concedes, throwing his hands up in surrender. “I’m going.”
As Duke heads off to take care of my chores, I look back at Patrick, my heart swelling with a mix of emotions I can’t even begin to untangle. But one thing is clear—Patrick’s here, really here, and I’m not about to waste a single moment.
I glance around for Wade, ready to introduce him to Patrick, but he’s gone. I frown, wondering when he slipped away, but then shake it off, focusing on the man in front of me.
“You got plans for the rest of the day?” Patrick asks, a teasing light in his eyes.
“Just you,” I reply, grinning.
“Good answer,” he says, and there’s a warmth in his voice that sends a thrill through me.
“Let’s go inside,” I suggest, slipping my hand into his. “I’ll give you the grand tour of the ranch.”
“Lead the way, cowboy,” Patrick says, squeezing my hand.
As we walk toward the house, my family trailing behind us, I can’t help but feel like this is the start of something new, something I didn’t even realize I needed until now. And for the first time in a long while, everything feels right.
Patrick’s really here, and suddenly, all the empty spaces inside me don’t seem so empty anymore.
As we lay there, his head resting in the crook of my arm and our bodies as close as we would get, my mind felt the most peace it’s had in almost two months, but my mind kept pestering me.
[August] “I’m exhausted, but I don’t wanna fall asleep.”
[Patrick] “Why is that?” He absently rubs my back, his eyes closed as jetlag settles in. He’s going to be out of it for a while.
My throat is tight with emotion as I confess.
[August] “I’m afraid you’ll disappear, like I’ll wake up and this will all be an illusion.” I hold him tighter, unwilling to let go. Patrick’s laughter fills the room and vibrates against me.
He stares at me with an amused smirk.
[Patrick] “August, If what we just did is all an illusion, then I’m Harry-fuckin-Houdini.”
CHAPTER 24 – AUGUST
Short scene in the truck bed at the river. August’s favorite spot to sit and think. Takes Patrick there with a picnic lunch from momma.
August asks if Patrick has ever had a Thanksgiving experience and Patrick says it’s his first one. August makes a joke about a turkey and ends it with, ‘gobble, gobble’. Patrick tells him what a gobble means in Scotland.
Patrick then shows August his gobble skills (wink)
CHAPTER 25 – PATRICK
_ FAMILY, FOOD, & FUN _
My first Thanksgiving in America, and I have’ta admit, I’m a bit overwhelmed. August's family is nothing but kind and welcoming, but the sheer size of the gathering is something to get used to. The Schuster family home is buzzing with activity, music, and laughter. It’s warm and cozy, with the comforting smells of roasted turkey and sweets.
Kelly is bustling about the kitchen placing the finishing touches on the array of side dishes while Elijah is carving the turkey. Duke sets the table while I keep Cori busy with kid puzzles and she tells me all about school. This five-year-old lassie is a bundle of energy that has everyone on their toes from the time she is up to the time her eyes close.
