Lovers & Monsters, page 17
“Isaac if you really want to learn how to focus your abilities so that they are no longer the monsters in your life, you are going to have to get out of your own way! Stop throwing up barriers. Your first lesson is to adopt an open mind. Until you are willing to do that, there is nothing I can teach you!”
Fury raged through him hot and boiling, setting his veins on fire.
He wanted to yell.
He wanted to scream until the sound consumed him. Worst of all, he could feel the monsters gleeful taunting. They were howling like wild beasts inside him, waging a war no one could fight but him.
A war he wanted to run and hide from.
He didn’t know if he could do this. Any of it.
And God, he wanted a drink so badly right now he could taste it, smell it, feel it sliding down his throat and burning everything else into oblivion.
He looked at the floor, gritting his teeth and trying very hard not to open his mouth and spew all the harsh, insecure things he was feeling inside.
Sidney’s hand tightened around his, and with her free one she gently caressed his face. Isaac lifted his head and turned to look at her, staring into her eyes.
“An open mind. Just keep an open mind, Isaac. For someone who sees the things you do, that shouldn’t be too difficult for you.”
Sidney’s voice was a soft whisper, and her touch gave him a measure of strength even as it soothed him. What was it Geneviève had said about her? That she was the kind of healer who helped others see their inner truths? Isaac closed his eyes and leaned his face into her caress.
“All right. I’ll try.”
“Good,” Geneviève sighed. “Well I think I’ve given you more than enough to think about for one day. And I do have a store to open.”
“And I need to get to work,” Isaac mumbled, reluctant to make eye contact with her again. He kept his gaze trained on Sidney instead and prepared to stand.
“But wait! Ike, you had questions about your abilities changing. That’s the whole reason you decided to come back here.”
“No, we’ll get to that another time, Sid.”
Isaac shook his head. He was done. He didn’t want to spend any more time in this place than he already had.
“But Isaac…”
“Changing?” Geneviève sounded slightly startled. “Your abilities are changing?”
“Yes!” Sidney spoke up for him. “Isaac, tell her.”
Isaac let out a heavy sigh, but he knew from the determined glint in her eyes that Sidney wasn’t going to let him leave this place without telling Geneviève everything. He looked down at the floor again and licked his lips.
“All my life my abilities have worked a certain way. I see people’s pasts, or something going on with them in the present. That’s it. But lately… since meeting Sidney, in fact, I’m uh…” He paused and shook his head. “I’m seeing future events.”
He didn’t know what sort of response he expected, but the total silence certainly wasn’t it. When he finally ventured a glance at Geneviève he frowned. Her eyes, normally tranquil and studious, were large and round and full of astonishment. Then her gaze flitted from Isaac to Sidney, boring into her even more intensely than she had done before.
Isaac and Sidney looked at one another, a silent question passing between them. Then they both turned back to Geneviève.
“What?” Isaac finally demanded. “What is that look?”
Geneviève took a couple of stilted breaths and pulled her gaze over to Isaac.
“The more you actively cultivate your talents, Isaac, your abilities will get stronger. That’s to be expected, like learning any new skill.”
“Yeah, but there’s more. We can see it all over your face. What aren’t you telling us, Geneviève?”
She appeared to take a nervous breath and her gaze flitted back to Sidney.
“Sidney. I suspect she is not merely a shield for you. She is an amplifier.”
Her words were spoken with a healthy measure of both awe and something else Isaac couldn’t quite place. Disbelief? Fear?
He and Sidney stared at each other once more, and then turned back to Geneviève.
“What does that mean exactly?” Sidney asked.
“It means just what I said.” Geneviève continued to stare at her in the most peculiar way. “I believe you are an amplifier.”
“Yeah, you’re going to have to explain that one. What is an amplifier?” Isaac asked. “Are you saying Sidney is some kind of rare psychic too?”
“No. No, of course not. An amplifier has no psychic abilities of their own. But their energy vibrates at a different frequency than most everyone else. It amplifies the psychic abilities of others.”
Isaac and Sidney exchanged another look.
“Are you saying that Sidney makes my abilities stronger?”
“She doesn’t merely make them stronger. She pushes them to evolve. Isaac, you are a hype with a shield who is also an amplifier. That means theoretically… With Sidney by your side there could be no limits to your psychic abilities.”
A violent clench of his stomach had Isaac fighting the urge to vomit. He could hear the rush of his rapid heartbeat in his ears and his thoughts began racing, scrambling to try and make sense of what Geneviève was saying.
No. Just no.
He’d struggled his whole life to outrun the monsters within him and pretend his abilities weren’t real. To accept his godforsaken solitary existence. Now, when he’d finally happened upon the one woman who could save him from that execrable loneliness, the one person he could touch without the ever-present fear of excruciating pain, she turns out to be the very thing making those monsters grow and morph into hideous beasts?
He had to get out of there.
He stood, the quick motion on top of the shock making him lightheaded.
“I need to go to work.”
His voice sounded hollow to his own ears.
Sidney stood next to him and took his hand again. A very small part of him wanted to recoil, to jerk his hand away and run as far away from her as he could get. But God help him, the bigger part of him was instantly soothed by the warmth her hand provided, the softness of her slender fingers on his skin. He took a deep breath and absorbed the impact of his heart slamming into his chest and skidding into a more normal rhythm. He tightened his hand around hers and moved toward the doorway.
“Thank you for your time, Geneviève,” Sidney said over her shoulder.
“Yes, of course. Isaac?”
He stopped and looked back at the psychic.
“Remember, please keep an open mind. I’ll look forward to our next session.”
Isaac swallowed and stared at her. “Yeah.”
It was all he could manage. He turned and headed for the door still clutching Sidney’s hand.
15
Keep an open mind? For Sidney, he could try.
Embrace the monsters? Not a fucking chance in hell.
They left the bookstore under a cloud of turmoil, both of them quiet and contemplative. Yeah, he had promised Geneviève that he would try the open-minded thing going forward, and that he would come back in for another chat real soon, and Sidney seemed to be happy with that. But Isaac knew deep down that he had no intentions of ever going back to that place. That woman spooked him in more ways than one, and he didn’t want anything to do with her or her clairtangency, or whatever the hell she’d called it.
Clear touching.
What the hell did that even mean?
And hypersensitive? Yeah, whatever. And he didn’t even want to begin to think about the implications of the things she’d said about Sidney.
“Well, that was heavy.”
Sidney’s voice carried a lilting quality, as though she were just as relieved the meeting was over as he was. Isaac’s jaw clamped tight and he started up the car and pulled out into traffic.
“Yeah. You believe her?”
His comment was meant to be sarcastic, but the moment Sidney turned her light brown peepers on him, he knew that he’d read her tone all wrong.
“Don’t you?”
Two little words, but he could hear it in her voice. She thought that fiasco back there had gone well. She bought into everything Geneviève had tried to sell them — hook, line, and psychic.
He didn’t answer her question. He just shrugged a shoulder and tried not to roll his eyes as he focused on the road.
“Isaac?”
He glanced Sidney’s way and she was staring at him with blatant reproach in her eyes.
“After everything Geneviève said back there? Everything she knew about you without even asking?”
“I don’t know, Sidney. She called me a psychic.” His tone was as sour as a lemon, and every bit as bitter. “And hell, according to her I’m supposed to be some sort of mythological, extra-powerful, mutant psychic to boot?” He blew air through his lips, making a raspberry sound. “I’ll be sure and tell Adam. He’ll get a real kick out of that one.”
“Everything she said back there described you to a T, Isaac. Even down to the nature of our relationship. She even gave you solid plausible explanations for your abilities, and offered to help you learn to control them. Are you really going to pass on that opportunity simply because you don’t want to be labeled as a psychic?”
“It is not just the word, Sidney.”
“Then what is it, Ike? What are you so afraid will happen if you finally address this part of yourself? It can’t still be disrespecting your father. You’re a grown man now, and by your own admission you and your dad are barely on speaking terms anyway. So what is it?”
Her words cut somewhere deep, and Isaac couldn’t bear to even begin formulating a response. He rubbed a hand over his face, covering his mouth and almost clutching his jaw, as if he were afraid words might escape. His eyes caught sight of an old pub up the road on his left and his gaze lingered longingly as he drove past.
God, he needed a drink.
A meeting!
Yes, a meeting. He meant a meeting.
He licked his lips and his stomach felt slightly queasy even as his mouth watered. He could almost taste the Tennessee whiskey hitting his tongue.
“I’ll drop you off back at the apartment. Then I’m going to have to hightail it to the station so I’m not late.”
Sidney sighed loudly enough to make her disappointment known, and Isaac felt like shit for disappointing her. Then he frowned wondering why in the world he cared so much about disappointing her in the first place.
“Fine,” she blurted.
He glanced over at her. He may not have had much experience with women or romantic relationships himself, but he had observed enough to know that when a woman used the word “fine” things were most likely anything but. He reached out and gently took her hand.
“I’m sorry, Sidney.” His voice was quiet and more than a little hesitant. “I just… I need some time to process everything that was said back there, okay? That’s just the way my mind works, darlin’. I need time to think. Can you give me that?”
Her face softened and she looked at him.
“Of course I can. I’m sorry for pushing. It’s just that I think you’re amazing, and I want you to be proud of the amazing things you can do.”
His heart constricted.
Was she for real? What was this goddess doing with him? He suddenly didn’t give a shit if what Geneviève said was true or not. He didn’t care if Sidney was the cause of his abilities changing or growing. He needed her, and he would do damn near anything to keep her close forever.
He gave her hand a light squeeze and then focused back on the road. Then he took a breath and searched for something else to talk about. He needed it badly.
“Once I get to work I figured I’d poke around the Rocky River investigation today. See if they’ve made any progress in determining Damien’s possible involvement in your harassment case.”
“Yeah? I thought your Lieutenant told you to stay away from it.”
Isaac nodded, relieved she’d let him change the subject.
“He did. But I won’t tell him if you don’t.” He tossed a grin her way, grateful to be on a different topic of conversation. “It’s all right. I have no intentions of getting in their way and pissing off Lieutenant Hayes. I’m just asking polite questions. I’ll be careful.”
“What about your dead waitress?” Sidney asked, looking him over. “You haven’t said much about that case lately.”
Isaac grinned at her. “No, I haven’t. That’s because I don’t want to bore you or freak you out with my job, Sid. You don’t really want to hear about all that anyway.”
“Sure I do.” She angled her body toward his. “I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t interested.”
“Okay. Well, we actually did get a pretty big lead on that one the other day.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. Two more victims surfaced.”
“Two!”
“Two. Both attacked by the same guy who did the waitress. The one actually happened a few days before. The second one, though? She managed to get away from him. She’s alive.”
“Really? So she’s okay?”
“She will be,” Isaac nodded. “My partner and I went to the hospital to question her.”
“How do you know it was the same guy who killed the waitress?”
Isaac hesitated for a second. “Well, I know because I had a flash when I touched the waitresses uniform, and again with the victim in the hospital. It’s definitely the same man. But even without my flashes, the DNA we pulled off the waitress matches the DNA from both the new victims.”
“Wow.” Sidney sounded truly fascinated. “So you saw the same man attack both women?”
Isaac nodded. “Unfortunately, I did.”
“I can’t imagine the burden you must carry, Isaac.”
Her tone was soft and apologetic, and Isaac glanced over at her and lightly squeezed her hand again, then brought it to his lips for a kiss.
“So, that’s great that you got DNA though, right?”
“Well, it would be if that DNA was a match to someone already in the system, but so far we’ve had no hits.”
He slowly pulled the car into a space in the apartment building lot. Then he got out and rushed around to get her door.
“You don’t need to walk me up, Ike. I’ll be okay.”
“I’m walking you back up to the apartment, Sidney. No arguments. Besides, I actually left some paperwork on the kitchen counter that I need, so…”
He placed a hand on the small of her back and escorted her inside.
They walked through the door of the apartment laughing about something Adam had said at lunch the day before.
“Oh, that must be your paperwork under my computer.”
Sidney rushed over to gather up her laptop from the kitchen island. As she did, a thin manilla folder fell from underneath it, spilling a few papers to the floor.
“Sorry!”
“Oops! I got it.”
They bent simultaneously to reach for the papers, and Sidney suddenly froze.
Isaac grabbed a handful and haphazardly stuffed them back into the folder. When he stood and looked down at Sidney he frowned.
“Sid?”
“What are you doing with this picture of Damien?”
Her voice went up an octave, sounding slightly panicked, and the look in her eyes was sheer fear. Isaac wondered what the hell she meant, and he reached down to help her stand.
“Damien? What are you talking about?”
She stood and thrust the picture at him.
“Damien! Why do you have a picture of him?”
Isaac took the paper from her hands with a sour feeling in his gut.
“Sidney, this is a computer composite sketch of the suspect from my new case. I had the last victim work with the department’s forensic artist and this is what they came up with. It’s a near perfect depiction of the man I saw in both of my flashes with the two victims. What makes you think this is Damien Jarvis?”
She looked at him as though he were stark raving crazy.
“Are you kidding me? I was married to the man for three years before I ran for my life. I’m telling you, that is Damien!”
The details of his flashes of the man in question came rushing back to him like demons dancing beneath a strobe light.
He tossed the file onto the counter and instinctively took Sidney’s hands in both of his.
“Touch her with purpose.”
Geneviève’s voice came back to him in a forceful whisper.
He stared into Sidney’s eyes with only one thing on his mind — Damien Jarvis.
Shadows of light and dark assaulted his vision.
When it cleared he saw a menacing Damien coming at Sidney with every intent of doing bodily harm.
The man swung.
Sidney hit the floor, unconscious and bloody.
Isaac flinched and let go of her hand.
Panting, he stared at her, fully aware that for the first time ever, he had seen something other than the future when he’d touched her. He had just gotten a horrifying glimpse of Sidney’s past, and it looked an awful lot like the flashes he’d had with the victims in his case.
“Oh, my God,” he whispered. “They’re dead ringers.”
“What? I don’t know what that means, Ike! Dead ringers? What are you talking about?”
“The victims — Marsha Woodford, Deondra Markland, and Karen Wilson.”
His gaze roamed over Sidney, frantically assessing her.
“Similar height, weight and build. Same light brown complexion and curly hair. Each one of them is just a poor substitute for you. Sidney… he is killing you over and over again.”
His words sucked all the air, all the life, right out of the room.
Isaac turned away, his eyes searching but not really seeing anything around him.
“That’s why the feeling of danger won’t go away,” he mumbled to himself.
“Danger?” Sidney questioned.
He turned to her and took her by the shoulders.
“Since the night we met there has been this haze of danger around you. I can feel it so strongly. And even after all that shit with Rivas-Solis ended it wouldn’t go away and I couldn’t figure out why. But this is why. It all makes sense now. It’s because Damien is here!”
