The Wrong Way to Catch a Rake, page 19
‘That isn’t kind.’
‘I am quite certain you shall give me full reason to.’
‘No, no, I shall be a model fiancé and husband. Reformed rakes and all that.’
‘That’s a right load of codswallop.’ She snorted and he laughed.
‘That’s a very un-duchessy thing to say, Rosie mine.’
‘Precisely. Why are you so calm about this?’
He sighed. ‘Resigned, not calm. The moment you found me I should have hustled you out of that room and made my own way out of the window as planned. I allowed myself to be distracted. My mistake. A bad one, admittedly, but mine. I retrieved it as best I could, but I couldn’t protect you.’
‘I don’t need you to protect me. And this is all a moot point. As I said, it is always a woman’s prerogative to change her mind.’
‘It is also unfortunately a woman’s fate to be tarred with the worst of any scandal, which is precisely what that Banister harpy is likely brewing even as we speak. I might be a useless fribble, Phoebe, but there is one thing I always do, eventually, and that is pay my debts of honour.’
‘I am not a debt,’ she snapped, and his mouth twisted as he reached out to touch his finger lightly to her fisted hand.
‘No, of course not; that was a bad choice of words. But... Would it be so awful? We get along well, you and I. You know the worst of me and you don’t appear to hate me, at least not until I did what I did last night. And then...there is this...’
His hand closed over her fist, raising it to brush his mouth over her knuckles, then turned it over to do the same to the sensitive inside of her wrist. It was the lightest of touches, but it wrenched at something deep inside her. Her eyes burned as she watched his dark head bent reverently over her hand. As if he truly cared.
He remained like that for a moment, his breath unsteady against her skin. His voice just also a little unsteady when he finally spoke.
‘Every time I touch you I fall deeper into this hole, Rosie. It’s becoming very uncomfortable.’
Uncomfortable? It was agonising.
She made another grab for sanity. ‘Lust isn’t worth sacrificing the rest of your life offering a marriage you don’t want.’
‘Who said I don’t want it? I think we could manage quite well together. I never considered marriage; or rather I did consider tying myself to an heiress at some point, but in truth I doubt I would ever have been able to bite that bullet. I’m just not that ruthlessly practical. But this is different.’
Different how? she wanted to ask, but he raised his head and picked up her braid again, slipped his fingers between the tresses and untwined them.
‘Consider the advantages, sweetheart. The duchy might be drained, but you’ll be pleased to hear my father couldn’t completely break all the trusts set up by Dommy’s clever father. As my wife you’ll have around a thousand pounds a year. That should keep you safe and clothed if your aunt decides to move on. I don’t like the idea of you being dependent on her.’
She shook her head. This was all too strange and unrelated to anything in her life, and why was she even considering it? Madness must be contagious.
‘Dominic. No.’
His fingers had continued to unravel her braid, but they stopped, resting lightly on her shoulder. His gaze rose to her, his eyes narrowed and slumberous with heat.
‘Why not? These past couple of days staying away from you... It’s been damn hard. I know you made it clear you don’t think much of me beyond my value in the sack, but for me you’ve become something of an addiction, Rosie. And even if that’s the only thing you truly appreciate about me... You do like this, don’t you?’ He stroked his fingers through her hair, fanning it over her shoulder.
Words choked in her throat, fighting for release:
You’re wrong—it is far from the only thing.
You’re also right—I do like this. No, I love this.
I love you.
She tugged her braid from his grasp, trying to find resolve, sanity...safety.
‘There is no point in this discussion until we know whether Mrs Banister will gossip.’
‘I’m damned if I’m having my fate determined by the likes of Mrs Banister.’
‘I see. You would rather have your fate determined by the turn of a card. Or worse.’
He shifted away a little as well. ‘Is that it? Your preacher parents come home to roost?’
‘No, Dominic. It is that we are fundamentally different.’ Frustration entered her voice as she continued. ‘I don’t understand you. I would have thought you would be delighted not to burden yourself with a wife of no particular birth, beauty, or resources. I admit this...this attraction between us is—other than being rather mystifying—is compelling. However, as we have already crossed the Rubicon, I am willing to continue to...well, to continue that. While we remain in Venice. I would think that would be sufficient for you.’
‘Sufficient.’
‘You know what I mean. Why on earth are you being so stubborn?’
‘Why on earth are you being so stubborn? Have you truly thought through the benefits of what I am offering? I may not have much, but as my wife you would certainly have more than you can hope for as a lady’s companion. You would have more than enough to live on for the rest of your life. So long as you don’t take up gambling.’
She pressed her hands together. ‘Dominic, I am a lady’s companion, daughter of a provincial vicar. My grandfather was a provincial doctor. I am not suitable material for a duchess.’
‘I don’t give a damn if you’re one of the Sultan’s concubines. I know who you are and you’re a far better prospect for a duchess than I am for a duke if I do happen to outlive my father. You are certainly leagues better than any milk and water miss he would like me to wed. And more importantly... I like you.’
He said the words as if he was tossing himself off a bridge. They were hardly a declaration of undying love, but she felt as if he’d bared his soul to her. Amidst all his lies she could still sometimes discern a clear truth. He liked her. Dominic truly liked her and somehow knowing that all but broke her heart.
Her breath shuddered in and out. ‘Dominic, please listen to me. I shall let this...this engagement stand. For now. To lend it plausibility I shall hint to von Haas that I stand to inherit my aunt’s money...’
‘No!’ The word was immediate and harsh. ‘Damn it, Phoebe. There you go again, insulting both of us.’
‘You are in no position to preach to me, Dominic. Those are my terms. Also—you will not mention marriage to me again.’
‘That will be a tad hard if we are engaged.’
‘You know what I mean. When we leave... When my aunt and I leave... I shall find a way to call it off and that will be that. Until then I want you to stop whatever it is you are doing here. No more sneaking about and climbing in and out of windows. I mean it, Dominic.’
He made a strange sound, half-laugh, half-grunt, and shoved off the bed. He strode to the window and she half expected him to leap out of it and transform into a raven, but then he returned to sit beside her. Closer this time, his thigh pressing against hers.
‘Very well. For the moment we’ll agree to disagree. I’m not in much of a position to negotiate, am I? So for now I’ll court you like a proper duke’s son and try my damnedest to keep my hands off you and the gossips off both of us. In a week we’ll depart for my cousin’s house on Capri. It’s on a beautiful beach and her neighbour is a charming, widowed count your aunt can flirt with to her heart’s content. We’ll have some privacy there so I can ravish you at night and work this out during the day. Meanwhile we continue as we are.’
‘Don’t think I didn’t notice you didn’t agree to my conditions about not sneaking about. You must think me a complete fool if you believe I can be so easily distracted with promises of islands and beaches.’
‘I think you...’ She heard the rasp of his stubble as he scrubbed his hand over his mouth, as if stifling a profanity. She could almost feel him thinking, trying to find some way to put her in a box and tuck her out of the way.
‘Get off my bed.’ She shoved his thigh with her foot. It was childish. His hand closed on her ankle and even through the blanket she could feel his strength. Then his hand slipped up to her calf, shifting the linen against her skin. His hand was hot. Or she was hot.
His head lowered, a shock of dark hair falling over his brow, the shimmer of moonlight catching on the hard line of his cheekbone and jaw.
An ache, harsh and frightening, cleaved through her, contracting her lungs. It wasn’t anger, or fear, or even that annoying, persistent lustful need. It was a different kind of fear altogether. It was like her uncle’s horary, the planets shifting into their new alignment, and this new dark planet was shoving its way into the centre.
‘Can’t you tell me, Dominic? Has it something to do with the Luzzattis? Have they a hold on you and are forcing you to steal things?’
‘Is that what you think?’
‘I don’t know what to think. No, they wouldn’t have you steal from von Haas. Not unless...’
‘Unless what? I’m curious what tale your fertile mind will construct for me next.’
His head tilted, a smile softening his mouth. All the while his hand was softly moving along her calf, his fingers slipping under her knee to caress the warm skin beneath. If he was trying to distract her, he was doing a very good job.
‘Is it political?’ she asked, clinging to her resolve, trying to read something, anything, on his handsome face. ‘Are you or the Luzzattis involved with the Carbonari rebels? Is that what you were searching for in von Haas’s rooms? Something to help them against the Austrians?’
‘Damn, I like that image you’re painting of me, Phoebe. A rebel with a cause. The only problem with it is that Donatello doesn’t give a damn about politics. At least not that kind of politics. The only power he cares about is his own. He hasn’t an ideal to his name other than the sanctity of his family. You’ll have to try again.’
‘This isn’t amusing!’
His hand stopped, tightening, and again she saw the curtain lift a little. ‘You said I must think you a fool. You couldn’t be further from the mark. I think you are the most intelligent, observant person I’ve ever met. I also think you must have been put in this world to turn mine on its head. In my wildest dreams I would never have imagined... What the devil am I going to do with you, Phoebe?’ His voice was low and hoarse, the plea in it dragging along her sensitised nerves.
‘Get off my bed,’ she managed, but her voice was as wobbly as her insides. She didn’t know what to think either. Her mind was a chorus of discordant voices, as if the whole of the Rialto fish market were trying to hock their wares inside her head. She wanted...she needed quiet so she could think. ‘Get off,’ she said again, more emphatically.
‘I should. I know I should. I will.’ He let go of her leg and stood but didn’t move away. She could feel his gaze on her, a physical scraping against her nerves. ‘You’ll be the death of me, Phoebe.’
‘Don’t say that.’ Her voice shook and she almost reached out to draw him back down beside her. ‘I won’t tell von Haas anything, Dominic. He will think what anyone would think—I’m a sad, bored spinster only too delighted to be seduced. Nothing more.’
‘No, he won’t. Von Haas is no fool. And he wants you.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous.’
He laughed. ‘Too late for that. Next time you see me sneak into a room, don’t follow.’
By the time she untangled herself from the sheet he was out of the window. By the time she reached it, heart in her throat, he was nowhere to be seen.
Chapter Twenty-Two
The small stone bench by the sea offered a lovely view of Giudecca under the noon-time sun. It also offered privacy.
‘Now that we are alone,’ said Milly, pinning Phoebe with her dark eyes, ‘what the devil happened last night?’
‘Nothing—’
‘Nothing?’ Milly interrupted. ‘You call becoming betrothed to Lord Wrexham nothing?’
‘Well, not really, but—’
Milly held up her hand. ‘Agatha Banister, the biggest, loudest busybody this side of the English Channel, barges into my bedroom at an ungodly hour of the morning when I had barely had two hours’ sleep and announces that you have been ruined. That she witnessed Lord Wrexham accosting you—her words—at von Haas’s soirée, and then he announced your betrothal.’
Phoebe waved her hands as Milly’s voice rose. ‘Please hush. Dominic was merely saving his skin. I found him rifling through von Haas’s belongings and then... Well, the long and short is that von Haas came in upon us and Dominic claimed he was proposing. It was a master stroke of distraction, damn him.’
‘Why did you find him rifling through von Haas’s belongings?
‘What?’
‘Why did you find him? Don’t tell me you too were fool enough to go rifling around von Haas’s belongings yesterday of all days.’
‘No, no, of course not. I followed him. Dominic. Wrexham.’
‘Why?’
Phoebe’s throat was tight with shame. Milly rarely took this tone with her. It was especially hard because it was well deserved.
‘I thought... I think he might be the carnival thief. Or working for the Luzzattis or the Carbonari rebels. Or all of the above.’
Milly’s mouth pursed. ‘And, believing that, you still thought it wise to follow him?’
‘I wasn’t certain. And you must admit that if that is true, we ought to know.’
‘Why? It doesn’t affect us in the least. For all I care there can be a dozen thieves denuding the local aristocrats of their jewels. What I do care about is that you allowed yourself to be distracted by a triviality merely because it might have involved Dominic. That is not like you and it is definitely not like you to be caught in the act. And in such an act. You were there to keep von Haas in sight while I stole documents from the Procuratie and planted them in Razumov’s rooms, climbing over fences and through windows dressed like a ruffian... I am too old for such nonsense.’ Milly’s voice descended into an unaccustomed snap and Phoebe winced.
‘You’re quite right, it was a mistake for us to switch.’
Milly sighed, relenting. ‘It wasn’t a mistake. It would have been impolite and out of character if you did not attend von Haas’s function after his gallantry towards you. But it was a mistake to follow Wrexham. I know you’ve grown fond of him, but no matter what he truly is—a gambler, a drunkard, a thief, or a rebel—you cannot protect him. You do know that, don’t you, Phoebe? We almost died trying to protect Jack and in the end it was all for naught.’
Phoebe took Milly’s hand and they sat in silence for a moment. She knew seeking salvation for anyone but oneself was hubris. And yet...
Milly patted her hand. ‘Never mind. We’ve dealt with worse. But you must tell me exactly what transpired so we can plan ahead.’
Phoebe nodded and told her most of what had transpired, including Dominic’s visit later that night to negotiate terms with her.
‘Capri, eh?’ Milly sniffed when Phoebe closed her tale. ‘Generous of him to throw in a charming Italian count. Like a bone to a dog.’
‘I’ve put us both at risk. I’m so, so sorry, Milly.’
‘I’m not chastising you, Phoebe. I’m worried for you. And I dare say a little frightened. I’ve been following your lead for so long it is disorienting to see you step off the path you yourself set. As your faithful sergeant, I feel obliged to raise the alarm.’
Phoebe tried to smile, but she was frightened, too. ‘You are hardly my sergeant.’
‘Of course I am. I have not the mind to pull it all together. I enjoy being told what to do and I enjoy doing it.’ Milly’s gaze narrowed. ‘And don’t change the subject.’
‘I didn’t, you did.’
‘So I did. Well, I’m changing it back. What shall you do about your betrothal?’
Heat and cold clashed inside Phoebe once more. What should she do? What could she do?
‘I shall wait. I don’t think von Haas shall mention it. He will likely consider the whole affair, and me, beneath him and avoid both. Luckily we no longer need him. Mrs Banister is the real problem, but with any luck lecturing both of us will satisfy her.’
‘Unlikely. This is too juicy a titbit to keep to herself. But aren’t you forgetting Wrexham?’
I wish I could. Phoebe almost said the words aloud, but not even to Milly did she want to reveal that much. She wasn’t ready for that. Part of her still hoped this was rather like the influenza and she would wake up the next morning cured.
‘He shall do as I ask.’
‘You are that confident in your power over him?’
‘Not at all. But he is feeling guilty and therefore inclined to try and make amends. And whether he is a thief or a rebel or merely one of Luzzatti’s pawns, the last thing he wants is to call attention to himself.’
‘My dear, his façade is all about calling attention to himself.’
‘Not this kind of attention.’
‘True.’ Milly sighed. ‘It is all so complicated.’
‘No, it isn’t. It cannot be. This is what I am, Milly. I cannot even imagine what it would mean to be anything else. Not without losing myself. I fought... We fought too hard to become what we are for me to toss it away because for the first time in my life my body has gained ascendancy over my mind. Oswald warned me it could happen and when that day came I might have to choose. In the end this is a choice between what I have and some...some fantasy.’
‘Becoming the future Duchess of Rutherford is quite a fantasy.’
Phoebe groaned. ‘That is a burden I most certainly don’t want. A title means nothing to me.’
‘But Dominic does.’
Phoebe breathed in and out. She wished so much that she could lie.
