The Leaving Road, page 8
“I know you were young, but I just can’t believe the man I raised would have done something like that. Even at eighteen years old.” He looked at the floor and shook his head with a frown. “Your mother loves you, she always will. She’s just going to have to find a way to come to terms with what you told her. I’ll make sure she calls you in a few days.”
“Sunday?” I was barely able to ask.
“Better not.” He turned and shut the door.
I didn’t think it was possible for me to sink any lower, but I was wrong. I couldn’t stop the flow of tears now that they had started. I sank to the floor with my head hung between my knees and just cried. Cried for the hurt I had caused everyone, and cried for the loss of my friendship with Magnolia. I had absolutely no one to blame but myself.
Chapter 16
Magnolia
After my disastrous date with Lance, the weekend passed by in relative calmness. On Saturday, Lexie and I went through the projects we felt would spruce up the house, watched YouTube videos and decided on the things we would do ourselves, then started to look online for a contractor to tackle the rest.
I had heard from Dr. Lewis, who had talked to Ben. Ben was thrilled about me coming on board part time. I’d be going in on Tuesday for a refresher and run down on how they work the clinic now. I was ecstatic. Luckily, once my old job had heard of the circumstances of why I had to relocate, they let me out of my contract. Now, I was free and clear to start working with Dr. Lewis. I have to say, I couldn’t wait to get back to my roots.
With not many plans set for the day, Lexie had run to the store to grab some things for the week. I had originally planned on going with her, but she said since she is moving to town, she has to start getting used to driving places on her own and mingling with the “townsfolk”.
I ventured into the kitchen, looking to see what I could scrounge up for lunch. Finding everything in the fridge for some BLTs, I got to preheating the oven so I could cook the bacon. In the middle of cutting the veggies, I couldn’t help but feel happy and at peace in this kitchen.
It reminded me of Sunday dinners, my dad’s awful attempt at cooking when he was home, and the memory of my mom and my laughter filling the space around me. My heart throbbed, but this time I was content being surrounded by our memories. A knock at the front door roused me back to the present.
I bet Lexie forgot her key.
“It’s open!” I yelled and continued placing the bacon on cookie sheets, my back turned when I heard hesitant shuffling behind me.
“I hope I’m not bothering you…” Lori’s voice caused me to whip around. She must have taken in my startled expression because she held her hands up in defense. “I should have knocked again instead of just coming in…it’s obvious you thought I was someone else.”
I took in her features; she looked tired, sad, and a little bit defeated. My heart ached for her, and if I was being honest, it ached for me, too. “Lori, please, sit.” I gestured to the barstools at the kitchen island. “Are you hungry? I’m making BLTs. It shouldn’t be more than fifteen or twenty more minutes.”
Lori’s round eyes showed she hadn’t expected me to invite her in at all, and before she could answer, the tears started.
“Oh, sweet girl…I’ve…I’ve missed you.” Her head hung low, and my already fractured heart started bleeding at the sound of her quiet tears. For the first time since being back in Rockland, I initiated a hug.
I rounded the island and pulled Lori into me, both of us finding comfort and solace in each other for the first time in eight years. I missed this. Once we seemed to compose ourselves, Lori pulled away from me, but kept me within arm’s reach as to fully take me in.
“You’re beautiful, Magnolia. I want to know everything about who you are now and what you’ve accomplished, but I think we must talk about the elephant in the room first.”
I sniffled; I knew she was right.
“I know it’s early afternoon…but would you like a glass of wine? I think we might need it,” I offered.
“I’ll never say no to a glass of wine, no matter what time it is.” She winked at me.
I walked to the refrigerator, knowing I had stored a bottle of pinot grigio in there, hoping like hell it was still one of Lori’s favorites.
“So, Cassie.” She half snarled, which took me a little bit by surprise because Lori hardly had an unkind word to say about anything, let alone anyone.
“You couldn’t even wait until I had the wine poured before we got into the ghosts of my past, could you?” I half joked.
“I’ve waited eight years, Magnolia…I don’t feel like waiting another second if I don’t have to.”
I nodded, unsure of what to say. I’m unsure of what she knows, and regardless of how I feel about Sloan, I wasn’t trying to create a wedge between him and his mom. That wasn’t my place.
“I feel as though I should start from the beginning, at least maybe fill you in on some of the blanks the best I can. I can’t help you when it comes to whatever my idiot son was thinking, but hopefully you’ll give me the chance to apologize. For my part in everything, anyway.” The tears started forming again, and I knew if she cried again, I would lose my composure. Thankfully, she just kept going, and I had a feeling if she stopped, she wouldn’t be able to start again.
“When your mom got sick, my attention was elsewhere—on her since your dad was still gone a lot, and on you because you were the one who was driving her to treatments, buying the groceries, cooking the meals, making sure the bills were paid. I had all my attention focused on getting you both through the day-to-day. I saw the light in your eyes dim every time you came back from your mom’s doctors’ appointments, only to be met with bad news. I would hear you cry in the shower when you thought no one was listening, and it broke my heart. It was around that time that I noticed Sloan was home less and less, and I realized he wasn’t here because I was here. It shocked me a little, and I sat him down and had a conversation with him about how, just because he might not know how to navigate this, your friendship was still important, and he needed to be there for you in your time of need. He confided in me that he was dating someone, and he didn’t know how to juggle your friendship and his new relationship. At that time, I was shocked to hear he was dating. A little disappointed it wasn’t you, but who was I to force a relationship between the two of you?”
I took a sip of my wine, doing my best not to dissociate so I could absorb everything she was saying.
“You continued to take on more of the stress with your mom’s sickness, and she was getting worse. I kept calling your dad, begging him to come back, but his own heartbreak was clouding his judgment as a husband and a father. I think he thought that if he stayed away long enough, he would come back to the way everything used to be.” Her voice cracked. “You pulled away from me, and with good reason. I thought you pulled away from Sloan as well. I begged him to keep an eye on you and help wherever he could. I didn’t know that meant he was sneaking into your bedroom window every night on the sly…” she said with ill-concealed disgust. “He told me that you and Cassie never got along, that it would be worse to tell you. I argued with him about it, but at that time you were barely keeping your head above water. I saw your grief suffocating you from the inside out, and I made a grave mistake in allowing him to keep the truth from you. When your mom passed, you were this shell of who you used to be; you never smiled. And then once the funeral was over, you were taking care of your dad, who had turned into a drunken version of himself.” The tears flowed freely down her cheeks.
“I knew it was wrong to keep the truth from you, but I couldn’t bring myself to give you one more reason not to smile. I had this dumb notion in my head that Cassie was a place filler for you until you and Sloan were ready to admit your feelings for each other. Turns out, I was wrong in that aspect as well. Cassie was dead set on getting her claws as far deep into my son as possible, but unfortunately, Cassie and Sloan’s relationship isn’t my story to tell. And as mad at my son as I am, I won’t betray his trust by filling you in. I don’t know all the details, so it wouldn’t be fair for me to gossip about it.”
“Yesterday, when we saw you, I asked Sloan about it, and he came clean. He told us about the conversation you overheard; he explained to us a little how Cassie used to treat you.” Her sad tears had transformed into tears of anger. “I’m so fucking mad at him, Magnolia.”
I gasped because I don’t think I had ever heard Lori swear once in my life.
“Oh stop, you’re an adult now, I can swear in front of you. I just need you to know that you were never an obligation to me. I considered you like my daughter; I still consider you like my own daughter. I would have never thought of you as an obligation… I am terribly sorry about my part in keeping Cassie a secret from you.” Tears were still streaming down her face. I pulled her into a second hug and let my tears spring free.
“I’m sorry it took me eight years to come home.” I was overcome with emotion, so that was the best I could do for now. I was ready to forgive and move on.
Chapter 17
Magnolia
Lori ended up taking off before the BLTs were even ready. She did, however, leave her number on a card on the kitchen table, and made her departure only after I promised I would call or text her in the next week or so, and set up a time for coffee.
Seeing Lori made me feel better and worse at the same time, and my mind was still trying to process everything. I was so lost in my feelings that I didn’t realize Lexie had made her way back.
“Do I smell bacon?” She floated into the kitchen with a huge smile on her face.
“You do… That’s quite a smile you’re wearing. Good trip to the store?”
“Actually, yes…” She fidgeted, looking a little unsure of herself. I tilted my head in question, so she knew I was on to her. “Listen, it just kind of happened…but we have guests.”
“Guests? I think I’ve had enough guests for the day.” Now it was her turn to look at me questioningly, but before I could elaborate, the front door opened and in walked Jace and Dexter. My gaze turned to them both, confusion on my face.
“Hey, Mags, ran into Lexie at the store and she mentioned you guys needed some help fixing things up?” Jace said as he began making himself a sandwich. I couldn’t help but be amused at his behavior.
While we weren’t close in high school, he was always around to some extent with Sloan. He was the kind of guy who never took anything seriously, but at one time he was serious about leaving this town.
“Why don’t you guys help yourself to some sandwiches, and we can talk about how this,” I waved my hand at the three of them, “came about.”
Dexter at least had the decency to look a little uncomfortable at Jace helping himself without a second thought, but when our eyes met across the kitchen, I offered him a half shrug and a small smile. He must have been satisfied with what he saw because he started making himself a plate and joined us at the table.
Once everyone sat at the table and had a few bites of food, I decided it was time to figure out what this was all about.
“So…” I prompted, hoping someone would fill in the details for me.
“I saw Ms. Lexie in the wine section at the grocery store. She looked positively distraught, so I had to go ask her what was wrong,” Jace started.
“I know this is a small town, but the selection is just terrible. I can’t believe it, Mags. How do they not have a solid Moscato option? My heart was weeping.” Lexie looked at me with a horror-stricken face. I knew how much that girl loved her sweet wine. It was a problem, it tasted like juice, went down way too easily, and always created the hangovers from hell. Regardless, Lexie didn’t care. It was her drink of choice, even in college, so I could only imagine the internal meltdown that Jace and Dexter were privileged to.
“We’re going to have to sign up for one of those monthly wine subscriptions,” she said, her face a mask of utmost seriousness.
“Don’t worry, Lex, we can make a road trip to a bigger city and stock up as much as you want. That still doesn’t explain why you two are here, in my kitchen.”
This time it was Dexter’s turn to talk. I found his presence here the most confusing because, even though I had only met the man once, I had the distinct feeling that his girlfriend Lydia was a foe, not a friend. She kept giving me the side-eye at the bar, and when Sloan and I started going at it, I could have sworn I saw her lips turn up into a barely concealed smile. I didn’t feel the need to address or even think much about it until now because Lydia was no one to me, so there was no use in sinking feelings into someone who didn’t even know me and vice versa.
“Well…basically, in the middle of the wine meltdown, Lexie let it slip that this house needed to be fixed up.”
“Meltdown, you say?” I looked over at Lexie with a fake shocked expression. “Lexie? My Lexie? A meltdown.” I tried my best to contain my laughter. “I don’t believe it.”
“Oh, hush you. I like what I like, I am who I am, and all that.”
Lexie was the exact opposite of me. She wore her heart on her sleeve, and you could always tell what she was feeling by one look at her face. She loved with her whole heart; she believed the best in everybody. She felt every single emotion on a large scale and never held back.
“But that still doesn’t really answer my question…”
“Oh yeah, well, see we own a construction business. We are partners. While most of our construction business is commercial, we have been talking about getting into the residential aspect for a while. We figured you might be willing to take a chance on us and give us our first residential project.” Dexter shrugged. He looked nervous, like I would tell him hell no.
I looked between the three of them. Lexie was staring at Jace with barely concealed interest, but her eyes were floating to the wedding band on his left hand. Dexter looked like he swallowed a fly, and Jace was looking at me with excitement.
I couldn’t help the smile that crossed my lips. “Hell yeah, let’s do it. Would you guys like a tour and see some of the projects we want done?”
Lexie and Jace both let out their own versions of an excited holler, while Dexter just gave me a half smile.
“Tour time!” Lexie threw her hands up in a clap. I still wasn’t missing the way she kept eyeing Jace out of the corner of her eye, and I knew I would be addressing that with her later.
We walked through my family’s home, pointing out the projects we knew were too big for us to take on, like redoing the fireplace, the flooring that needed replacing, the roof that leaked in one spot. Jace was over enthusiastic, oohing and aahing about how great the place was. Dexter was mainly silent, but I could tell he appreciated the house as much as I did. He ran his hands over parts of the walls with almost reverence. If I were being honest, as personable as Jace was, the way Dexter approached every room was what sold me on them doing the job for us. Our tour ended with us in the living room near the front door.
Jace wrapped his arm around Lexie’s shoulders and tapped her nose. “This seems like the start of a beautiful partnership, ladies.” And even though he addressed us both, all his attention was on her.
I wanted to be furious, because, hello, wedding ring. But he was looking at her with an open adoration and doing it in front of his friend so…what gives? Before I could open my mouth and ask, Lexie pulled Jace to the front door and out to the porch to talk about hanging one of those deck swings. She’s been nagging me about it for days.
You have the dock, you love to sit and think about life, you love it there. I’ve always dreamed of having one of those swings where I could sip my morning coffee or drink my nightly wine. Please, Mags!
I told her she could have whatever kind of swing she wanted, but I was sure that wood needed to be replaced and things needed fixed before that could happen. Thankfully, Lexie realized how dangerous it could be and backed off for a while; however, I knew it wasn’t something she’d let go of completely.
“He’s married,” I whispered, though I was unable to take my eyes off the fact that they were clearly into each other.
Much to my horror, Dexter spoke up from beside me, earning my attention instead of Jace and Lexie. “He’s only married legally, not physically or emotionally.”
“Hmm…I take it you won’t give me any of the juicy details?”
He held his hands up in mock surrender. “Unfortunately, no. Dicks before chicks and all that.”
I cackled. “Isn’t the saying chicks before dicks?”
“Maybe for chicks.” He smirked at me. “This house is magnificent.”
Cue the subject change.
“I always loved it growing up. I’d always imagined I would get married here, start a family here…” I said almost wistfully.
“We will take care of her for you.”
“I think this is the most you’ve spoken to me since we met.” I couldn’t help but address it.
He gave me a shy look; I could tell he was mildly embarrassed I had called him out on it. “It isn’t personal… Lydia and I have been together for a while, and she, well…she’s friends with Cassie. I just didn’t want there to be any unnecessary drama started by us interacting.”
I didn’t have time to mask the confused look on my face.
“Lydia is…well, she’s dramatic. Not that I don’t love her, because the Lord knows I do. She’s almost loyal to a fault, and Cassie is part of her people. I didn’t want to give her any reason to be rude to you.”
