A Fourth of July Proposal, page 22
Jaycee considered. “I don’t know her that well.”
“She was a good friend of Dave’s sister, so she knows Dave’s brother-in-law, if you pair them up for the wedding. I’ve been working with her on the mill, and I admire her a lot. Heading up a construction company isn’t easy for a woman, so I like her moxie.”
“You know, Dave’s mom couldn’t complain since she’s a friend of Dave’s sister, but she won’t like Andie because of her job.” Rachel nudged Jaycee.
Jaycee squealed. “Rachel, I like this snarky side you’ve got coming out. I’ll talk to Andrea.”
She reached to hug both Rachel and Mariah.
“I promise, once this wedding is over, and we’re back from our honeymoon, I’m going to properly thank you two. Dave’s mom invited his dad’s boss to come to the wedding, so that is the official seal of approval from Mommie Dearest.”
“Isn’t that going to put out your count?”
“No, Dave had already marked them down as coming. His mother didn’t know, though, so while I suspect she liked the thought of causing me trouble, she must think the wedding is going to be good enough to impress them. And it is.”
Mariah nodded calmly. “It’s going to be incredible. That’s what I do.”
* * *
RYKER HAD FORGOTTEN how much healing took out of a body. And getting older made it worse.
As his body recovered from the trauma, and he had more energy, he slept less. That gave him more time to think and remember. He worked as much as he could, but there was still too much time to think about Rachel.
He knew he’d made the right decision, for her, but it sucked that he’d hurt her. He hadn’t expected that she’d feel...that strongly. He’d underestimated her, like everyone else did.
He hadn’t understood how much it was going to cost him, as well.
Carter’s Crossing was not a place he’d wanted to come to. He’d been fortunate to make some friends here. Benny and Mr. G hadn’t just provided him with a place to live and a job, they’d also become friends. Before the accident he had found himself stopping in at the shop every day, to check on work and talk to Benny.
Mr. G was at every AA meeting. And after, it had become a standing date to go out for coffee.
He wasn’t best friends with most of the town, but after helping Rachel at the church, and giving his speech to the school, he didn’t get those looks anymore. Not from everyone. There were still people who saw him as one of the Slades and always would. But others were pleasant or sometimes smiled with apparent sincerity.
Jean, at the diner, had brought him his coffee without a sniff, sigh or slam. And it had been from the fresh pot. Mr. G explained that her son had enlisted after Ryker’s talk. He’d been starting down a path similar to Ryker’s and Benny’s.
Which meant his speech had reached someone. That felt...good.
Then there were the people in town who needed computer help. Those people waved and greeted him happily.
Most of the people opening up B and Bs in the town were older, and not very tech savvy. Ryker had started with Mavis Grisham. Except for her Great Dane, who had wanted to sniff his crotch all the time, he’d enjoyed taking the photos for her house, advising her how to make the most of what she had to offer and showing her how to run her website.
He made sure Tiny, the Great Dane, wasn’t in any of the photos. He didn’t agree with her belief that he would be a selling factor.
He’d looked up the organizations for B and Bs for the state and given her that list. She’d sent him home with pie and patted his hand whenever she saw him.
He had a few more to get set up, people who’d been reluctant to work with him because of his last name. Now they needed his help. He didn’t blame them, but he was human enough to enjoy that they had to wait to reap the rewards of an online presence until he could get around better.
He’d put down roots here. And now that people didn’t look at him like he was...well, a Slade, he was less eager to leave.
He was surprised at how lonely he found the time in his apartment. He had become used to solitude, after he’d stopped drinking and no longer had those superficial friends. For those first weeks in Carter’s he’d enjoyed having the place to himself. Now he was getting cabin fever. He actually...wanted to be around people.
Not only was getting around awkward, he didn’t have his bike to provide transportation, if he’d been able to ride it. Benny would let him use the van, which he could drive with the handicapped controls, but Ryker wouldn’t presume unless he needed to go for food or a doctor’s appointment. Something essential.
And he was still weaker than he wanted to be.
The person he missed most was Rachel. He hadn’t realized how much she’d become part of his life until he’d excised her. He emailed her his thanks for her and her family’s help, but her reply had been brief. She hadn’t encouraged a response.
That was what he’d wanted, or at least, what he knew was best. This time alone, with little to do but work and sleep and try to engage with online entertainment, exposed how much he’d grown to care for her.
Care for her? Sure, call it that.
Thanks to that annoying voice in his head, he’d finally admitted to himself that he’d fallen in love with her. It wasn’t a surprise. It was more surprising to him that more men hadn’t.
But that only reinforced his determination to do what was best for her. Ryker Slade wasn’t the best for anyone, let alone Rachel.
One morning, feeling especially morbid, but fortunately less tired, he filled a computer bag with the couple of laptops he’d cleaned up—including his most frequent subject, the laptop again full of viruses—and threw it over his shoulder. He had a pair of shorts on, loose enough to fit over his cast, and a T-shirt. Spring had finally rounded the corner to summer, and jackets were no longer needed.
Just as well, since his was gone.
He crutched out of the door and sat on the stair chair that he was finally getting accustomed to. He let it lower him down the stairs, and then made his way to Gifford’s front door. Of course, it had a button he could push, opening the door automatically and allowing him to make his way in.
Ryker had a new appreciation for accessibility these days.
Benny looked up from his workbench.
“Hey, man. Good to see you. How are you doing?” Benny raised a hand. “No, for real, how’s it going?”
Ryker hitched his way around the corner and set the bag on the table that Benny had allocated for computer work. He rested against the table, weight on his good foot, crutches set aside.
“I’m surviving.”
Benny shrugged. “Some days, that’s all you get.”
“I was getting tired of my own company, so I came down to see what was going on.”
“You’re always welcome, and you can drive the van if you need to get out.”
“I appreciate the offer. I think I’m good—there’s still a lot of food up there.”
Benny shook his head. “We’re going to miss Rachel when she’s gone.”
Ryker couldn’t move. He hadn’t been prepared for talk of Rachel. He swallowed and struggled to sound normal.
“She’s leaving?”
Benny shot him a glance. “She worked for her uncle, and, as you know, he’s not practicing right now. There’s not another lawyer in town for her to work for, and I expect she’ll be glad to leave.”
She did want to leave, Ryker knew.
“She does a lot for this place.”
Benny nodded. “After my accident I ended up one of those sideline people, you know? I couldn’t do much, so I watched from the sidelines. Overlooked. Rachel was one of those people, too. Always ready to reach out, the kind of person who noticed when someone needed help. I think it was a result of her mom dying.”
Ryker frowned. He’d known her mother had died, but he didn’t know the details.
“When did her mother die? What happened?”
Benny’s eyebrows shot up. “You don’t know? Rachel was twelve, I think. Her mother was a really nice woman, I heard. A lot like Rachel—always helping people. When her mom died, I think Rachel stepped up to take her place, the best she could.”
And everyone let her, Ryker thought. Benny continued.
“My mom died when I wasn’t much older. I remember Rachel brought us food, offered to talk to us if we wanted. Her mom died of breast cancer, mine of ovarian cancer. So we had that in common.
“I didn’t talk to her—too focused on not letting anyone know I was hurting. My dad started drinking. I started to get in trouble—it wasn’t a great time.
“But Rachel would stop by with cake from time to time—and she wasn’t that much older than me. After the accident, when Dad got this place set up for me, she stocked up the place with everything I’d need. It was the church, in theory, who set me up, but I know she did most of the work.”
Ryker nodded. That was exactly what Rachel would do. And why it was good for her to leave.
“I was glad you were giving her bike lessons,” Benny continued. “Well, maybe I should have been more worried about accidents, but it was something she was doing for herself. And you guys seemed... Okay, none of my business, but I thought maybe you guys were a thing.”
A thing. Yeah, whatever they’d been was as vague as that description, a thing.
“We were friends.”
Right.
“Were? I haven’t seen Rachel’s car out there, and friends would visit, right?”
Ryker started to reach for his crutches but halted. “Yeah, we’re not a thing anymore.”
Benny’s eyes expressed sympathy. “Cause of this mess with her uncle?”
“No!” Ryker would never hold her uncle’s behavior to her account. “That’s nothing to do with her. It...we...before the accident.”
“You mean, when you ghosted out of here for a few days?”
Ryker kept his gaze on the ground. “Yeah. I kissed her. So I had to leave.”
“I would do some squealing here, because I called it, but obviously, something went wrong.”
“Of course it did. This is me, one of the Slades. I’m not exactly Rachel’s type.”
Benny held up a hand. “Whoa, wait. Are you telling me Rachel thought she was too good for you? Rachel?”
“She is too good for me.”
A moment of silence. “Ah. This isn’t a Rachel thing. It’s a stupid Ryker thing.”
“You have a lot of things going on in that head of yours.”
Benny sighed. “Okay, you have your own issues. I get it. But I’m going to say my piece. I don’t think people around here know the real Rachel. Rachel’s been put in a box for a long time now, and she didn’t even try to get out. But lately, lately she’s changed up how she looks, she’s learning to drive a motorcycle and some of the old biddies were complaining that she wasn’t going to do the fall bazaar. It was like she finally figured out what she wanted and started getting it.
“I thought you were part of that. But I guess you see her in that same box everyone else does, and you don’t want to let her get what she wants.”
Ryker could do a good “don’t mess with me” face, and he employed it now.
“No, that’s not right. I’m glad she’s not letting people take advantage of her. But I don’t want to take advantage of her, either.”
“Rachel is a lot stronger than anyone thinks.”
The face was not working the way it normally did, because Benny was totally ignoring it. Ryker pushed himself up on his good foot. “I know she is.”
“No, you don’t,” Benny growled at him. “Or you wouldn’t be making decisions for her.”
Ryker grabbed his crutches and swiveled to the door. He used the end of a crutch to activate the automatic door. Waiting for it to open took a lot of the zest out of the gesture of storming out.
He left all the computer stuff behind. He wanted to take off on his bike for a ride. Or get a drink. Or go for a run.
All he could do was ride the stupid chair rail up to his own place so he could brood in peace.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
RYKER NEEDED A MEETING, and he needed not to run into Rachel. Fortunately, Mr. G was willing to drive him over to Oak Hill. No questions asked.
Ryker was getting better with the crutches, but still found the hassle involved with doing the simplest things frustrating. On the other hand, everything was frustrating him right now.
And why was that?
“Oh, shut up,” he grumbled as he pulled himself up on his crutches.
“Sorry, what was that?” Mr. G looked startled.
Ryker took a breath. “No, I’m sorry. Just talking to myself.”
“If you’re telling yourself to shut up, then maybe you need this meeting more than I realized.”
Ryker knew Benny had been talking to his father. Ryker was rethinking the benefit of friends right now. The good kind who hung around when things were messed up—the kind he’d never had before. Now they cared enough to give him a hard time.
This church was fully accessible, and Ryker was able to crutch up a ramp to get inside. There was an elevator to help him to the basement, but he refused to take advantage. The extra effort of working down the stairs both soothed and irritated him.
He needed to get to his meeting and get off the crutches. He’d bypass the coffee, because what he needed most now was to quiet his brain.
He should have known better. Things never worked out.
He hit the last step and turned, following the signs, counting down till he could sit in the room and focus, when he saw her.
He froze, absolutely unable to process at first that she was really there in the hallway in front of him, not some hallucination his twisted mind had dreamed up.
Hey!
Then she turned and saw him.
He was right there, with a front-row seat to watch her response.
First, he noticed the circles under her eyes, the slumped shoulders, the sparkle gone from her face. All the signs that things were not going well with Rachel.
Of course they weren’t. Her uncle was in rehab, and her life must be upended.
Then, recognition. And instead of disgust, her face lit up, happy to see him.
Then, when he didn’t move, had who knows what expression on his face, the light left. Her expression closed down.
“Hi, Rachel. We didn’t expect to see you here.” Mr. G at least had enough on the ball to respond to her presence in a socially acceptable way, rather than staring at her like a block.
The corner of her mouth twisted as she moved her gaze to Mr. G, behind him.
“Yes, I can see that. Don’t worry. I won’t get in your way.”
Before Mr. G could respond, she’d turned and slipped into the room beside her, the one with the sign on the door reading Al-Anon. The group she’d found for herself.
Ryker was still unable to move. He heard Mr. G, over his shoulder, let out a long breath.
“I said I wouldn’t get involved, but, Ryker, I hope you know what you’re doing because that girl is hurting.”
As Mr. G passed him, moving toward the AA meeting ahead on the right, Ryker saw the set expression on his face.
He did know what he was doing, didn’t he? Rachel deserved someone better.
And you’re the one who gets to decide for her? Because you’ve shown how smart you are to date?
He wanted to tell that voice in his head to shut up again. Anyone would agree that Rachel deserved better.
Anyone but Benny and Mr. G, right?
He was arguing with a voice in his head. If that wasn’t an indication he needed to get his butt into this meeting, he didn’t know what was.
He moved forward quietly as he passed the Al-Anon doorway. He couldn’t resist glancing in, needing to see Rachel, as much as it hurt him to see her sadness.
She was in the back row, and the look on her face broke his heart. Just like he’d break hers someday.
Someday has already happened, idiot.
What he wouldn’t give for a drink.
* * *
“ONE WEEK. IT’S one week. How are we going to get everything done?”
Rachel tugged Jaycee’s hand away from her anxious teeth. “No biting your nails.”
Jaycee put her hand down.
“We’re fine, Jaycee.” Mariah was unbothered, calm and patient. Like she was used to this.
She was. Which was a good thing, because Jaycee had a bad case of bride nerves.
“But there’s so much to do!”
Mariah put a hand on her laptop. “Everything is here, everything is assigned a time and person and everything will get done. And all the plans on the computer are backed up in the cloud, so nothing bad is going to happen.”
“What if it rains?”
“The forecast is looking good so far, and we have tents.”
“What if it’s a thunderstorm or a tornado?”
“The church hall is our backup.”
Jaycee stuck out her bottom lip. “But it won’t be as pretty.”
“No. But you’ll still be married, Dave’s family is all here to see it and then you’re off on your honeymoon.”
“I’m sorry.” Jaycee sat down. “I’m such a mess about this.”
Rachel leaned over and put a hand on Jaycee’s. “What were you doing this morning?”
Jaycee shot her a look and winced. “I was at Dave’s folks’ place.”
Mariah shook her head. “Do your best to avoid Dave’s mother for the next week, okay? If she asks you questions, tell her to come to me. I can handle this. It’s going to be a beautiful wedding, and you’re getting a fireworks display thrown in for free.”
