Written in Black, page 17
“What did you find out?”
“Nothing. The adults aren’t talking, and Kevin wasn’t getting enough attention, so he left …” My brother could see I wasn’t convinced by this reason. “Hey, Aaron, you were with him the whole day. What’s wrong with him? Did something happen?”
“Why? What’s wrong with Kevin?”
“I’m asking you!” I said, growing exasperated. “Well? You were here!”
“I don’t know … We were just doing our chores … Normal stuff.” Aaron paused for a moment, as if he had just thought of something. “Well, he did disappear when the Malacca Lady came over.”
It wasn’t surprising that she’d dropped by to proffer some form of spiritual advice for the funeral, and I for one was glad that I’d missed meeting her. I’d seen her in action before, during a blessing ceremony organised by Ah Em for this very house, and she had behaved even bossier than Mrs. Yap on the day. She’d gone around the house like a woman possessed, ranting and raving at the adults, ordering them to move that chair there, lest a ghost sit in it, or to move a picture here, lest a ghost come out of it, or to reinstall the lights on another side of the room, because that would keep the ghosts from hiding in that corner. Kevin had been absolutely terrified of her then, and her presence today must have stoked those fears afresh.
“Did she do anything? Cast a spell on him or something?”
“No, I don’t think she even met Kevin. I think I only saw her talking to Ah Em … Nothing unusual, really.”
Just then, Ah Em, Ah Peh and my father stepped out of the house, letting Frida, Aaron and me to take our turn for dinner. We were having yesterday’s leftovers, reheated and refried, but I wasn’t complaining; this was my first proper meal of the day, and I was too hungry to care about taste and freshness.
After dinner, we resumed our duties. Unlike yesterday, there would be no bunking-off upstairs to play around; we were to maintain the vigil through the night, and even Aaron wouldn’t be spared. It wasn’t an arduous task by any stretch of imagination though; we were scheduled to go to bed at 1.00 a.m., and Aaron and I had slept later than that time on a number of occasions. However, there was one small problem – I was to spend most of the night with Uncle Ben, and that wasn’t something I looked forward to doing. He and I were to handle watching over Ah Kong in the tent, while Aaron and Michael were in charge of burning the paper at the circle of fire.
The setting sun was met with the emergence of a swarm of small bats, smaller than the ones I’d disturbed back at the abandoned house, chittering animatedly as they began their hunt for bugs. The smoke from the circle of fire and the joss sticks at the altar kept most of the insects and especially the mosquitoes away from us, but I did see occasional flying forms swooping down to attack the house’s drains.
The ever-darkening orange hue of the evening sky soon gave way to a deep indigo. A chorus of high-pitched croaks commenced around us, the hungry cries of the garden frogs, who were also coming out to have their dinner. I thought of Pak Tut, nestled away in his cage at the back. Did he dream of the freedom to hunt all the creatures flying and roaming around Kevin’s garden? Did he even want to do that anymore? How much ambition could there be left in the lizard who got his meals minced up and hand-delivered, twice a day and with seasonings?
Uncle Ben sauntered over to me and sat down on the chair beside me. He gave me the sort of look that one would give a puppy born with no limbs, or to a beggar-child with no eyes. I gave him the same look back.
“So, Jonathan … How are you feeling?”
“I’m okay.”
“Oh, your poor, poor Ah Kong … Why do the good die so young?”
“He was 78 …”
“I mean, he was such a wonderful man, your grandfather.” Uncle Ben’s voice cracked. “Kind and generous and loving. You know what he said to me on my wedding day? He said that, for once, here was a man who deserved to be the one to take his daughter off his hands … Shelter her, pay her bills, indulge her every whim … He loved me like I was one of his own! I’ll never be able to repay him.”
“Right …”
“I feel like a hug … Come on, Jonathan, give Ol’ Ben a hug.”
Cringing to myself, yet unable to come up with an excuse to get out of it, I got off my seat and placed a light hand on his right shoulder, holding my breath the instant I got a whiff of the overpowering mothball smell coming off him. He lifted himself off his chair to embrace me all the way.
“Hey, let’s get the other two over here,” he said when he let go of me. “We’ll have a nice get-together. There’s no rule about having to burn the paper so far away from the tent, is there?”
“I don’t know. You’re the one in charge.”
“Well, it can’t hurt, can it?” he clucked. “Hey! Hey, Michael! Aaron! No need to stay so far away! Come on over here!”
Aaron and Michael looked at each other with obviously reluctant expressions, but after a bit of annoyed eyebrow twitching and nostril flaring, they came over to join us, bringing their evening’s work with them.
“What’s the problem, Uncle Ben?” Michael asked.
“No problem. Just thought a little chat would be good for everyone.”
I almost snorted at that.
“Why don’t we share some stories, huh? I was telling Jonathan about the time I got married to your Ah Koh. We were at the part right after I proposed and took her to see my parents.”
“But I thought she forced you to marry her,” blurted Aaron. I flashed him a warning glare, but he missed it completely.
“Ah, ha ha,” Uncle Ben laughed nervously. “What? Where did you hear that?”
“Ah Koh told us. She said that you kept staying over at her place, and that everyone was talking, so she had to keep scolding you until …”
“Oooooh, your Ah Koh was just pulling your leg, boy! What a sense of humour, huh?” Uncle Ben laughed again, but his face had turned a bit red. “Anyway, your Ah Kong … What a man he was. Taking in a guy like me, with not much money or status, and still giving me all his trust.”
“Wow, that was great of him,” Aaron piped in.
“Indeed it was, Aaron.”
“Yes, even though you have abnormal testicles.”
I couldn’t help but burst into a fit of giggles, but then forced myself to look serious again. Michael covered his mouth and laughed into his hand. Uncle Ben looked mortified.
“Wh-what? How did you know? I mean …”
“Oh, I thought everybody knew,” Aaron said, seemingly confused about what was so funny about what he had said.
“Right, er … You know, that’s not …” Uncle Ben came to a stuttering stop then looked desperately between the three of us and the coffin in which our grandfather was resting. “Ah, I need to go to the toilet. Sorry.” Uncle Ben promptly sprang off his seat and ran back into the security of Kevin’s house. Once he was inside, Michael and I broke into the loud bursts of laughter we’d been suppressing for the past few minutes.
“I can’t believe you told him that!” I chortled. “Where’s your common sense? Now he’s gone running to Ah Koh to tell on us. She’ll be here any second to pinch us into saying sorry.”
“Oh no! Her pinches hurt!” Aaron wailed.
“Well, at least he’s gone. Finally!” Michael declared. “Can’t believe I have to spend the whole friggin’ night with that clown …”
Minutes later, once the laughter had died away, I began to worry in earnest about how awkward it would be if or when Uncle Ben came back from the house. It had all come out in front of our dead grandfather, and in hindsight, it felt like we’d crossed a line along the way. But considering the type of man he’d been in life, I doubted that Ah Kong would have cared too much. In fact, there had been times when he had sided with us kids when one of the adults made complaints about our wild and unruly behaviour. At least, up until that fateful day he chanced upon us setting off fireworks next to the gas cylinders in Kevin’s kitchen.
“Now what? That was kind of rude. It won’t be very comfortable when he comes back, with or without Ah Koh.”
“Whatever, man. All I know is that I’m happy he’s not here …” Michael whipped out a cigarette and lit it with the fire from the burning papers. “And I can have a little of this without any worry.”
“Hey, isn’t that disrespectful to Ah Kong?”
“I’m lighting up to his memory, shitface. Have you never heard of toasting to the dead? Actually, since he used to smoke, it’s probably disrespectful that you two aren’t lighting up.”
“Why don’t you let me try?” Aaron tried his luck.
“Fuck off. Go buy your own.”
“You don’t want to smoke, Aaron,” I warned him. “Look at what you could turn into,” I pointed to our elder brother.
Michael presented me with a vulgar hand gesture.
“Way to prove my point, Michael. Seriously, how long do you think Uncle Ben’s going to take? He can’t leave us three alone here.”
“I don’t care …”
He took a drag, leaving Aaron to take charge of keeping Ah Kong’s trail to heaven going. The ingot-making activity entrusted to me had been left untouched for a fair while.
“I can’t believe that idiot might get a share of the inheritance,” Michael snorted. “And to think Ah Kong was such a tight-ass …”
“That’s probably where Pa gets it from.”
“Pa? Don’t even compare him to Ah Kong! Our grandfather was like … Axl Rose and Bono combined compared to Pa. Our father’s just a miserable bastard who can’t enjoy anything in life and has to shit all over us to let it out.”
“Hey, Pa’s not that bad!” I argued.
“You’re practically his clone, that’s why you’re defending him. Ah Kong was twice the man that Pa could ever be. Hell, he lived through the Japanese Occupation and almost got killed by those soldiers …”
“Almost killed by soldiers? I’ve never heard that story.”
“Is it the one with the stomach ache?” Aaron butted in.
“He knows.” Michael smirked at me.
“How the hell … How come I don’t know about this?”
“That’s ’cause you’re such a loser.”
“Shut up.” I turned to my little brother. “Aaron, what happened with Ah Kong and the soldiers?”
“Pa told me that when Ah Kong was a boy, he had to help out at his father’s shop by making small deliveries. One day, he happened to have a bad stomach ache, but he was forced to run to one of the other shops to deliver a bundle of cigarettes. A group of Japanese soldiers bumped into him along the way and stopped him. He was so scared that he forgot to salute and just stood there. The soldiers got angry, and the angrier they got, the more scared Ah Kong became and the worse his stomach ache got. Finally, it became too much for him, so he ran to the roadside, took down his pants and went ‘ppprrraaappp’ right in front of them.”
Aaron brought his hands to his buttocks then waved them downwards for illustration. Michael wrinkled his nose at this.
“What did the soldiers do?”
“They laughed and then rushed off pinching their noses.”
“Wow, I really didn’t know about that one,” I chuckled.
“There’re loads more that you don’t know. I bet you can’t think of a better story about Ah Kong, can you?” Michael challenged.
“Well, I do know one. Remember Ah Kong’s Goddess of Mercy idol? The one you tried to grab off that high shelf because you thought it was topless? Oh, all the pieces I could count when it crashed to the floor. “
“How do you …” Michael was open-mouthed in amazement. “That must’ve been … Were you even born then?”
“Of course I was! You just think everyone else has a lousy memory like yours,” I tutted. “Does your ass still smart from the whacking he gave you for that?”
“Shut up, toadstool!” He flicked his cigarette straight at me, and it landed on my left arm with a burning sting. Yowling in pain, I jumped off the ground, and in doing so, accidentally kicked at the basin containing the circle of fire, spilling black ash all over Aaron’s trousers. He, in turn, jumped back as well, causing the burning paper folds to spill out and extinguish completely.
“You dickhead! Look what you did!” I screamed at Michael.
“You’re the clumsy idiot! Don’t blame me!”
“Oh no, it’s everywhere!” Aaron frantically dusted himself down.
“What did you throw that cigarette at me for? This is your fault!”
“Jeez, it was only a cigarette butt. Who asked you to act like such a girl, toadstool?”
“Who asked you to act like such a moron, gecko? Now we’re all screwed.”
“Guys, we’d better get this back together. Otherwise Ah Kong will never get to heaven!”
“This is just a bowl of dust, okay? And there’s no such thing as heaven, Aaron. How old are you?”
“He’s eight, Michael. Still acts older than you do though.”
“Want to get burned again, toadstool?” Michael waved a fresh cigarette at me.
Ignoring him, I set the tipped-over basin back to its rightful position and retrieved the scattered paper folds. Almost all of the ash was dumped on the ground around us, and wasn’t worth attempting to scoop up. However, fearing that their presence might attract unwanted attention tomorrow, I pressed my shoes into the piles of ash and worked them into the ground.
“What are you doing with your foot? Nobody’s going to notice or care,” muttered Michael, a newly-lit cigarette sitting between his lips, and his legs crossed ever so casually
“You could help me out here, you know,” I grumbled.
“Fine.” He picked up one of the folds and ignited it with his smokestick. He then placed it in the basin, and Aaron picked up from where he left off, building a new chain of fire that sat deep within the ash-depleted container.
“Hurry up! Uncle Ben’s coming back!” I urged my younger brother, after noticing the front door opening slowly.
We resumed our original positions by the time Uncle Ben had returned to his seat. He acted as if the entire dialogue about his testicles had never happened, and that worked just fine for us. He didn’t notice the spilled ash either. Instead, he continued recounting the memories of his courting of our aunt and trying to make Ah Kong seem like a Bruneian version of the Dalai Lama. Personally, I’d have preferred hearing more interesting stories about my grandfather’s life and adventures during the Japanese Occupation and the rebellion of the ’60s. Or even anything to do with how Ah Kong had dealt with my parents’ marriage.
My parents had met in Manchester, where they’d both been sent on government scholarships. Given the opportunity to experience the carefree, independent lives of university students in England, only my mother had seized the chance to make the most of her time there; what I’d gathered from the snatches of conversations I’d overheard between the adults was that Mum had accumulated a wealth of experience partying and travelling, as well as getting into a string of relationships with numerous men, by the time she had hooked up with my father. What my parents had seen in each other back then, nobody knew; they probably didn’t know themselves.
Inevitably, Mum’s reputation set the stage for the confrontations ahead. Both Ah Kong and Ah Ma had considered her a no-good floozy who’d squander their son’s inheritance and their legacy, and they’d shared this belief with Pa, poisoning his mind against Mum from the beginning. Even after things became a little more cordial between Mum and her in-laws, she had probably never gained their full blessing. As far as I’d heard, Pa would always take his parents’ side in any dispute between his parents and Mum, especially about her going out in the evenings without him or getting involved in activities that he (and they) didn’t approve of. After all, everyone knew the heartbreaking story about her dance class.
Mum had been a very talented ballroom dancer during her undergraduate days in England, and a frequent prize-winner in a number of inter-university competitions. Sadly, there was little hope of continuing her interest once she returned home, but the spark never died down, and she was desperate to keep dancing. A few years later, after doing some research, she had managed to devise a business plan for setting up a small dance class she hoped to run on a part time basis with a friend.
The idea never came through, however, because of opposition from my father’s side of the family. They argued that a good wife should spend all her evenings supervising her children and tending to her husband, and that it’d be improper for her to show her body off to, and get into close physical contact with, strangers outside the family, especially strangers who were men. Because Mum would have been the main source of capital (via her late father’s savings), as well as the main instructor, her friend was unable to go ahead without her, and the whole project had collapsed. It was almost twenty years since she last danced, but even up to the days before her leaving for Australia, I could remember her reminiscing about the tours she had been on and her performing in fancy ballrooms.
I was brought back to the present and to our vigil over Ah Kong’s body by the sound of Uncles Ben’s loud and melodramatic sighs. I realised that he had probably said something extremely emotional, and wanted us to react to it. His droning continued, and he narrated one boring story after another, but we tried our best to tune him out. He eventually nodded off at a quarter past midnight, his head lolling back against his chair and snoring lightly with his mouth wide open.
“Hey, let’s put something inside it!”
“Don’t, Michael. You’re in enough trouble already!”
“You’re such a killjoy, you know? Jeez, you’re as bad as Jen.”
“No, I’m not!”
“Oh, yes, you are,” Michael sneered, then stretched out his hands and yawned. “I am so bored. I was waiting for this idiot to fall asleep so I could take a little break.”
“A break? Now?”
“Yeah, now. My hands are fucking killing me.” And with that, he got up and left.
“Where’s he going?” Aaron wondered.
We saw him walk past the front entrance and disappear behind a corner.
