Nantucket in Bloom, page 15
“He was so funny,” Anna heard herself say. “We used to laugh and laugh until we couldn’t laugh anymore. And he was adventurous, too. He always wanted to try a new restaurant or see a new band in concert or travel somewhere spontaneously. When he asked me to marry him, I thought— wow. My life is going to be so exciting because he’ll always be around.”
Jackson continued to study Anna with dark eyes, hanging on her every word.
“When he died, I was pretty sure that I was just going to die, too,” Anna confessed, her voice breaking. “But now…”
Should she tell him? It was such a huge intimate secret, and yet, a strange part of her needed her father to know.
“What now?” Jackson asked, sounding like he was on the brink of tears, himself.
“I just learned that I’m pregnant,” Anna whispered. “It’s too early to tell people. But I’m telling you because, well.” Her voice continued to waver. “Because I love you. And I missed you. And I know, now, how short life can be.”
Jackson’s face broke open. He immediately covered it with both hands as his shoulders shook. “Oh, Anna.”
Anna wasn’t sure where to look. She cupped her hands together until she felt her father reach for her, and then, she took his hand with hers. Together, they sat like that, linked for the first time in a year.
“Thank you for telling me,” Jackson said then, his eyes wide open and honest. “I know I don’t deserve it.”
Anna remained very still.
“I can’t apologize enough for how I handled everything last year,” Jackson continued. “I got so greedy with my life. I wanted everything to change all at once, and stupidly, for the first time since you kids were born, I was ready to focus only on myself. It should have come as no surprise that you, Henry, and Rachel wanted nothing to do with me after that.
“But I’m so sorry, Anna,” Jackson continued. “I’ve learned so much during this crazy year. Sometimes, I miss your mother more than I can bear to admit, even to myself. She was such a wonderful partner to me for years.”
Anna frowned.
“And I know that she’s even happier now than she was with me,” Jackson continued. “Which is a slap, of course, but one I deserve. Men leave their wives all the time, of course. Arrogant, terrible men like me. But they don’t often watch their wives return to ‘the one who got away’ like that. It’s a remarkable and terrible experience.”
Anna blushed, recognizing the pain in her father’s eyes.
“I just hope that you’ll allow me a bit of space in your baby’s life,” Jackson said. “Again, I know I don’t deserve it. But I’d love to know him or her.”
Anna’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m here, aren’t I?”
Jackson lifted his chin.
“I mean, I want to be here. I want to work things out with you.” Anna stuttered, on the brink of falling apart. “I know it will take time and effort on both of our parts. But I feel ready to do that. If you are.”
Jackson nodded and closed his eyes. And at this moment, Anna remembered a time very, very long past when her father had sat by her bed as she’d fallen asleep – terrified of the nightmares that had plagued her. I’ll be right here, Anna. Don’t worry about a thing. Your daddy will keep the nightmares away.
It came as no surprise that Grandma Greta had prepared a gorgeous feast for Anna’s return. What had begun with “let’s just tell a few people about the pregnancy” had soon extended to, “Why not tell all the Copperfields about the pregnancy?” and now, it seemed that the entire house was filled with expectation, swallowing Anna with hugs. Greta hurried Anna to the table, where she poured her a glass of lemon water and told her that the city air was probably very bad for her— that it was better for her to remain on the island from now on.
“How was your dad?” Scarlet sat next to her, wearing a knowing smile.
Anna laughed nervously. “It was weird and really nice to see him.”
“It’s weird to forgive people, isn’t it?” Scarlet said, glancing across the room at her father, who was in the midst of explaining a story, his hands moving wildly around him to illustrate his points.
“It makes me feel so much lighter,” Anna confessed. “Only for the time being, of course.” She spread her hand across her stomach and winked.
Scarlet laughed outright. “None of us can wait for this baby. I heard Grandma talking about decorating a nursery in The Copperfield House just this morning.”
Anna shook her head, incredulous. “It takes a village to raise a child, I guess.”
“Have you told Dean’s parents about the baby yet?”
“I called them last night after I got back to my hotel in the city,” Anna explained. “Dean’s mom almost fainted. They’re arranging a trip to come out to see me soon.”
Scarlet smiled. “It really is a miracle.”
A moment later, Eloise, Harriet, Herb, and Harriet’s three children arrived, ambling through the door to the dining room with suntanned faces and happy smiles. If Anna wasn’t mistaken, she was pretty sure that Eloise and Herb had been holding hands upon their entrance to the dining room, which they immediately dropped. Anna locked eyes with Eloise, remembering the incredible journey they’d both been on since they’d stumbled into one another in that nondescript diner.
“How was the city, honey?” Eloise asked as she slid into the chair on the other side of Scarlet.
Anna placed her hand lovingly on Eloise’s shoulder. For the first time in ages, Eloise wasn’t wearing her overalls and had instead donned a dark green dress. She looked gorgeous.
“The city was a surprise,” Anna answered honestly. “And I think I owe you a thank you.”
Eloise cocked her head. “Why?”
“You reminded me that life is full of surprises,” Anna continued. “As long as I open my heart to them.”
Bernard appeared in the doorway, his arms laden with a platter of glistening turkey, as Greta peered from behind his shoulder, barking instructions. “Everyone! Sit down! Dinner is ready!” And in the wild haze of the next few moments, Anna allowed herself to fall into the chaos, another puzzle piece of the gloriously complicated Copperfield Family. She wouldn’t have had it any other way.
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