Her Determined Husband, page 7
Kirsten flicked another apprehensive glance at the clock on the wall. ‘I won’t make the flight now. It’s cutting it too close. Can’t he go through these notes with me tomorrow?’
‘No, he’s tied up in a meeting tomorrow with the location people. But it’s all right.’ Cal shrugged. ‘Theo ran through a few of his ideas with me, and he’s given me his notes. I said I’d drive down to San Francisco with you and we can run through them together on the way. I said we’d work on them tomorrow as well. It seemed to pacify him.’
‘You said what?’ Kirsten stared at him in horror. Why couldn’t he leave her alone to make her own arrangements?
‘It’s OK, you don’t need to thank me,’ Cal said with a grin.
As for thanking him, she would rather have spent six hours driving with Theo frothing from the mouth than spend the time with Cal. This was like some kind of bad dream, where Cal kept turning up over and over again to torment her. ‘But it’s a long drive and I…’
‘I know, it’s a damn nuisance. Why the heck did you decide not to fly?’
She wanted to tell him straight, that a six-hour drive had seemed preferable to even one hour in his company. But she held her tongue. Flinging insults at him at this stage wasn’t going to help. ‘I wanted to call and see my parents,’ she said instead.
‘Oh!’ His face cleared. ‘Well, I wouldn’t mind seeing Robert and Lynn again.’
‘You must be joking!’ That was the point where Kirsten lost her cool.
Chloe cleared her throat. ‘Er…if you’ll excuse me. I’m going to go and have a shower. I’ve got an audition in an hour.’ Kirsten glanced over at her friend and realised she was diplomatically leaving them to it.
‘Yes, thanks, Chloe, and listen, break a leg today, OK?’
‘Yeah.’ Chloe grinned and slanted a look at Cal. ‘You too,’ she said softly.
There was silence for a moment when they were left alone.
Cal glanced at his watch. ‘If we are going to make a detour down to see your parents we’d better get a move on.’
‘Cal, I am not taking you to see my parents,’ she said firmly, her voice steadier now.
‘Why not?’ He frowned.
‘Because….’ She shook her head helplessly. ‘Look, I shouldn’t have to explain this to you. It’s common sense. You and I are divorced. My parents won’t want to see you.’
Cal looked genuinely perplexed by this. ‘Why not?’
Kirsten slapped the flat of her hand against her forehead. ‘I’ve just told you. We’re divorced—’
‘I think Lynn and Robert might have figured that out by now.’
‘Don’t get smart, Cal—’ Her voice shook. ‘I’m not having you upsetting my parents again.’
‘I’ve never fallen out with your parents,’ Cal said gently. ‘I like and respect them very much.’
Kirsten swallowed hard. Why did she feel like crying suddenly? ‘Yes, well, that may be the case,’ she said in a low, trembling tone. ‘But…but you still hurt them.’
Cal got up from the table. ‘I know our divorce was a grim time for them,’ he said quietly. ‘But, unlike you, Kirsten, they still like me enough to look on me as a friend.’
Kirsten stared at him. ‘How come you are so certain of that?’ she asked, her tone raw.
‘Just after we split up they sent me a very thoughtful and understanding letter and they still send me Christmas cards.’
Kirsten couldn’t have been more surprised had he told her that her father was a secret agent for the FBI.
‘They didn’t tell me they were in contact with you,’ she said.
Cal’s eyes met hers. ‘Why do you think that was?’
‘I don’t know.’ She shrugged.
‘I still have the letter. I’ll show it to you some time if you’d like. It’s very touching…and extremely perceptive—’
‘No, thanks, I’ll pass on that.’ She glared at him.
Cal watched her for a moment. ‘Kirsten, maybe I wasn’t the best husband in the world,’ he said gently, ‘but it wasn’t my fault that Bethany died.’
The words reverberated through Kirsten like a time bomb. ‘I don’t want to talk about…that.’ She stopped him, her voice tightly controlled, her face ashen. She didn’t want to discuss it with him…couldn’t discuss it with him.
He seemed about to argue, to say something else, then his gaze moved over her stricken features and he shrugged. ‘OK.’ He glanced up at the kitchen clock. ‘We should be going. I take it those are your suitcases in the hallway?’
She nodded, relieved beyond words that the subject was changed.
‘If you give me your car keys, I’ll put them in the trunk.’
She went to get her handbag, noting as she passed that another suitcase now sat next to hers in the hallway. ‘Where’s your car?’
‘I took a cab over here.’
Silently she handed him her car keys.
‘Are you ready to leave?’ Cal asked, heading for the doorway.
‘Just give me a minute.’
He nodded and turned to deal with the cases. As soon as the front door closed behind him Kirsten wanted to run and lock it. She wanted to shout childishly after him, Go away and don’t come back. Instead she schooled herself to go upstairs and tidy herself up.
She brushed her hair and tied it back in a pony-tail, then applied some lipstick to brighten herself up. But she was just going through the motions because inside she felt numb.
She remembered feeling like this when her marriage had been falling apart. She’d still been reeling from losing Bethany and she just hadn’t been able to cope emotionally with any of it. She had felt raw, yet detached from everything, as if it was all somehow unreal and happening to somebody else. Somehow she had managed to pull herself back from the brink, and she had got over it.
Now with Cal coming back into her life she felt suddenly as if she had returned to square one. All the old pain was back…all the feeling of shocked disbelief…even the dreams, and he was as detached as ever.
Her eyes moved to the telephone in her bedroom. And hurriedly she went across to phone her parents to tell them she wouldn’t be coming for lunch today after all. Maybe what Cal had said was true. Maybe her parents had written to him, had put the divorce and what had happened behind them. But, even if that was the case, Kirsten couldn’t hack a reunion between Cal and her parents. It was another step backwards down a road that was too painful even to contemplate.
She dialled the number and waited but the number was engaged. As she waited for the line to clear she walked with the receiver to the window and looked idly out.
Cal was leaning against her car in the bright morning sunshine. He was talking to someone on his mobile phone.
Come on, Mum, who the heck are you talking to? Kirsten urged, turning away from the window.
Then abruptly she got through, but, although she allowed it to ring and ring, no one answered.
Maybe they had both gone out immediately they’d hung up from the last call. They were probably both on their way into town, happily planning what they were going to cook for lunch for her. Or maybe her mother was vacuuming and couldn’t hear the phone.
They were going to be so disappointed when she told them she wasn’t coming. But it couldn’t be helped…with the best will in the world she couldn’t go now.
‘Kirsten, are you ready?’ Cal called from the hall.
‘Yes…coming.’ She put the receiver down. She’d just have to try and phone them later in the morning.
‘If you want to drive to my house we can transfer the cases to my car and I’ll drive,’ Cal suggested when she joined him outside.
‘No, I want to drive, thank you.’ She got behind the wheel. ‘I want my car whilst I’m in San Francisco.’
‘You can always rent one. Which is what I intended to do.’
‘I’d rather drive my own.’
‘Formed some kind of emotional attachment to the old jalopy, have you?’
Kirsten remembered his stylish car with the dashboard like an aeroplane and heated leather seats. She supposed her vehicle did seem like an old jalopy compared to his. ‘It might be old,’ she said tightly, ‘but it’s perfectly adequate for me.’
At least they were back to backbiting about nothing, she thought. She could just about handle that. It was when the conversation skidded off into deeper, more specific details that she felt overwhelmed by emotions that truly terrified her.
‘Do you want me to drive?’ he asked.
She gave a forced smile. He was doing it again, trying to take over. ‘What’s the matter, don’t you like being chauffeured by a woman?’ She slanted a wry glance at him.
‘On the contrary, I quite like it,’ he smiled. ‘I was just being chivalrous.’
‘That will be the day.’
Kirsten looked at the road stretching ahead. She was driving along the coast; the sky was a cloudless, dazzling blue and the sun glittered on the ocean like silver raindrops. She felt her heart lift. It was a perfect spring day. If she ignored Cal and concentrated on her driving the time should pass quickly. It would be OK, she’d handle it, and it would give her the chance to show him how little he meant to her now. Then the scenes in the film would be easier; he’d know she was only acting.
‘Shouldn’t you have turned right there?’ Cal asked her.
She shook her head. ‘Don’t be a backseat driver, Cal. I’ve looked at the map; I know which way I’m going.’
Cal shrugged.
She was aware suddenly that instead of looking out of the windows he was watching her. She tried to pretend that she didn’t notice, but it was unnerving. Why was he staring at her like that? Did she have a mark on her face? Maybe her mascara was smudged? She desperately wanted to check her reflection in the mirror, but didn’t dare take her eyes off the road.
‘I’m sure you should have turned there,’ Cal said again.
‘Shouldn’t you be running through Theo’s notes?’ She flashed him an impatient look.
‘OK.’ He reached onto the back seat and lifted up a folder.
There was silence for a while as he leafed through them.
‘Right…the scene we shot yesterday, where we are at breakfast, Theo flicked through the rushes early this morning and he thinks that you’re not looking at me enough.’
‘Not looking at you enough?’ Kirsten frowned. ‘What does he mean? Of course I looked at you.’
‘You’re not keeping eye contact with me for long enough.’ Cal mimicked Theo’s theatrical broken English. ‘Not enough emotion, Kirsten…we need more fire.’
Not enough emotion; hell, that was a laugh, Kirsten thought derisively. Theo should have been in her kitchen this morning, or in Cal’s car last night. She shied away from that thought quickly.
‘He wants us to practise looking at each other.’
Kirsten slowed the car, miscalculated what she was doing and crunched through the gears.
She saw Cal grimace. ‘Glad this isn’t my car,’ he said.
‘Is that some kind of joke?’
‘No. I really am glad this isn’t my car. You should drive an automatic, Kirsten—’
She glared at him. ‘I’m talking about us practising looking at each other; I mean, that has to be some kind of a wind-up, right?’
Cal met her eyes innocently.
‘No…there’s a whole list of things like that here.’ He waved the sheet of paper airily in her direction and she saw a full page of what looked like stage directions.
‘Theo must have been up all night writing those,’ Kirsten said tersely. ‘Are they all centring on my faults?’
‘No…to be fair, there are a few things he wants to draw to my attention…’
‘Just a few?’ Kirsten watched Cal as he flicked his finger searchingly down the long…long list then turned the page.
‘Here we are. He thinks when we have that argument about the working rota that I need to concentrate more on my motivation.’
‘What’s your motivation?’
‘I want to take you to bed.’
‘Pardon?’ She switched her eyes from the road.
‘That’s what my motivation is. I want to take you to bed and—’
‘Yes, OK, I get the picture.’ Kirsten felt herself blush uncomfortably.
Cal flicked over another few pages. ‘He has highlighted a few scenes that he thinks we need to run through. He says that unless we can work something out they are going to present a problem.’
‘What kind of problem?’
Cal shut the folder. ‘Quite frankly, Kirsten, reading between the lines, I think that Theo has picked up very quickly on the fact that we are not entirely…easy around each other.’
Kirsten’s hands tightened on the steering wheel.
‘And in a romantic picture I’m sure you’ll agree that’s a bit of a problem.’
‘I tried to tell you that when you told me you had accepted the part,’ she reminded him curtly.
‘Come on, honey. We’re professionals.’
‘Don’t call me that.’
‘What, a professional?’
‘Honey…don’t call me honey,’ she grated.
‘There you go again. You’re really uptight, Kirsty. You need to relax.’
That had to be the understatement of the year, Kirsten thought. But there wasn’t much chance of relaxation while he was around.
Cal closed the folder. ‘Do you remember our first date?’ he asked her suddenly.
Kirsten didn’t answer. She wanted to say no. But that was a blatant lie. She remembered it all too clearly. ‘Not really,’ she said dismissively. ‘What’s that to do with anything?’
‘We went to that party from hell,’ Cal continued as if she hadn’t spoken.
‘That wasn’t our first date, it was our second; on our first date we took a picnic to the beach.’ She looked over at him and caught the gleam of satisfaction in his blue eyes.
He smiled. ‘So we did…’ he drawled.
And she knew right then that he had set a trap and she had walked neatly inside. He remembered their first date just as clearly as she did. ‘What about it anyway?’ she asked crossly.
‘I was just thinking that when we have difficulty acting in these love scenes…when we feel tense around each other…maybe we should try a bit of method acting. We could try and picture ourselves back on that beach three years ago. We could remember the heat of the sun on our bodies, and the even greater heat inside when we looked at each other.’ Cal’s voice was deep and huskily seductive, and somehow it summoned up the memories of that day in an evocative and electric way.
She glanced across at him and a shiver of pure nostalgia raced through her body from nowhere.
There was the sound of a horn furiously cutting the air. Hurriedly Kirsten returned her attention to the road.
‘So what do you think of my idea?’ he asked after a few moments when they were on a quieter section of the road.
‘Quite frankly, as a method of relaxation I think it stinks,’ she said, pulling herself together.
‘So what do you suggest we do, then?’
She shrugged. ‘Maybe I’ll just try and picture myself with somebody else,’ she said flippantly. ‘That might work.’
She flicked a glance at him and saw that he wasn’t too enamoured of the suggestion; there was a gleam of annoyance in his blue eyes now. She smiled to herself. It felt good to dent that massive male ego of his. The man was too damn sure of himself by far.
‘So who are you planning to use as your subject; not Jason surely?’ Cal grated derisively.
‘Why not? I had no problem playing a love scene opposite him once before.’
‘Well, good for you,’ Cal muttered sarcastically. ‘Is that when the love bug between you bit? When you were between the sheets on set?’
Kirsten’s hands tightened on the steering wheel, but she forced herself to make no reply.
‘It’s no wonder you can so easily picture yourself working opposite Jason,’ Cal continued, still with that edge in his voice. ‘You two have done a lot of work together, haven’t you? A show on Broadway and that TV special; was it by accident or design?’
‘It was just by coincidence, that’s all.’
‘I do hope he’s not going to pine away for you while you’re in San Francisco.’
She threw Cal a scathing look. ‘As a matter of fact, he’s coming to San Francisco next week and we are going to meet up. Not that it’s any of your business.’
‘They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, don’t they?’ Cal drawled. ‘Maybe he’ll propose?’
Kirsten was about to snap, Don’t be ridiculous, Jason just happened to be coming to San Francisco on business next week anyway…then she stopped herself. She had been right first time. It was none of his business.
They travelled onwards in silence. Kirsten thought about Jason. She supposed if she allowed their friendship to develop it could get serious. Jason liked her…maybe he more than liked her. And she liked him…but not enough, at least not in the way you should feel about a man you wanted to be serious with. Yet she didn’t want to lose Jason’s friendship.
Was there something wrong with her? she wondered suddenly. Two years was a long time to go without any serious involvement. Maybe she just wasn’t ready?
There had been no one since Cal. The very idea of starting a new relationship, learning to trust someone, placing herself in that vulnerable position again of falling in love and losing control…scared her deeply.
‘Shall we stop and have a coffee?’ Cal asked suddenly. ‘There’s a good hotel further down here, just off the main road.’
She glanced at the clock on the dashboard and was surprised to see that she had been driving for nearly two hours. ‘Yes…OK; I want to try and ring my parents.’
‘To tell them you’ll be late?’
‘To tell them I won’t be coming.’
Whatever Cal thought about that, he kept his opinion to himself, and for that Kirsten was grateful.
The hotel Cal directed her to had a small coffee lounge just inside the main foyer. They sat amongst the potted palms and listened to the piped music and tried to pretend that they couldn’t hear the women who were arguing at the other side of the room about whether or not that really was the Cal McCormick.
