Seducing My Guardian (A Touch of Taboo), page 6
“What do you mean?” My voice has gone breathy and I’ve stopped fighting. I carefully grip his big bicep and shift, rubbing my pussy against his fingers. “I’m a virgin. How much more of a good girl can you get?”
“You expect me to believe that when you’re rubbing yourself all over me right now?”
“It’s not my fault.” I don’t stop, though. I just swirl my hips a little, trying to get him to make contact with my clit. “It feels too good to stop.”
“I damn well should stop.” He sounds absolutely tormented. It’s so sexy, I almost come on the spot. Devan’s fingers flex again. “You should tell me to get my hands off you right this fucking second.”
I look across from us, belatedly realizing that he’s positioned us in front of the large mirror. “Look at us,” I breathe. “Look at how good your hands look on my body.”
“I’m your guardian, birthday girl. This is so fucking wrong.”
I skate my hands down his arm to his hand. I spread my legs a little wider and tilt my hips and, god, the tips of his fingers slide into me. “It feels better because it’s wrong.” I press against the back of his hand and he slides his fingers a little deeper. Not deep enough, but doing this in half-measures feels particularly dirty.
“Devan?”
“Yeah,” he grits out.
I roll my hips, fucking his hand as much as he’ll allow. “I want to have sex so badly. Are you really going to trust that experience with some idiot boy?” I grab his other hand and bring it to one bared breast. “Wouldn’t it be better to have an older, more experienced man make sure it’s good for me?”
“Hazel.”
“No one has to know,” I whisper. I watch him watch me in the mirror. “No one has to know you’re my first. It will be our little secret.”
Chapter 9
I don’t really put must stock in virginity. I gave up religion when I lost my parents, but even if I hadn’t, I don’t think any gods out there really care about where or not I’ve had sex. The only ones who seem to care about purity are the people intent on controlling young women’s bodies. I don’t fuck with that nonsense.
I had sex for the first time right before I turned twenty. He was a nice guy who treated me with great care. I think he was more nervous than I was. We dated a few months and then went our separate ways with no hard feelings. So yeah, I don’t believe for a second that the first person you sleep with magically links you to them for the rest of your life.
But sitting here, playing out this fantasy with Devan, it feels particularly sexy to lean into those stereotypes, to put far more importance on my imaginary virginity than I ever did on the real thing.
Devan kisses my neck almost furiously. “I should take you to a bed. Should lay you down and touch you gently and treat you the way virgins should be treated.”
My breath catches in my throat. “But you’re not going to?” I sound far too hopeful, but I can’t help it. Yes, a little voice inside me chimes. Yes, make it dirtier. Treat me like your special little slut. The truth is that at nineteen, I would have laughed in his face if he tried to take care with me. I was still too raw and drunk on my newfound freedom, desperate for anything, anyone who would make me feel something and help me lose myself for a few hours.
“I should.” He shoves two fingers into me. “I’m supposed to take care of you.” He fucks me slowly with his fingers, and I’ve never been so grateful for a mirror before. I’m a visual person. I always have been. Seeing him touch me like this only adds to the pleasure of feeling it happen.
I will never be a woman who wants to fuck with the lights off.
“So take care of me.”
Devan keeps finger fucking methodically, working a little deeper each time. Then he adds a third finger. “Can’t believe no one’s had this pussy before,” he growls. “You feel so fucking good, so wet and tight.”
“You feel good, too.” I’m gasping, writhing around his touch, but he holds me too firmly to do anything but go at his pace. “I need more.”
“Need to go slow. Get you ready.”
I give a frustrated sound and reach behind me. Devan loosens his hold enough to allow me to undo his pants. All a game. Protest, protest, protest. But we both know the truth; we’re both dying to get him inside me properly. I free his cock and freeze. “You’re too big.” My trepidation isn’t entirely feigned. I’d forgotten for a moment. It’s going to take work to make him fit.
Devan shifts and pulls a small bottle out of his pocket. I frown at it in the dim light. “What is that?”
“Lube. It’ll help.” He guides me up a bit so he can rearrange his cock to a better angle.
I stare as he spreads lube over himself in economical movements. “You brought lube with you.”
“A last minute purchase.”
Ah. That makes more sense. Hauling condoms around makes more sense than hauling lube around, but then again, if someone is Devan’s size, maybe that’s something they need to have on hand. The thought might make me laugh if I wasn’t staring so hard at his cock. I swear he’s gotten bigger since I had him in my mouth.
He wraps one giant hand around my hip and uses the other to guide his cock to my entrance. “Go slow. You control the pace.”
I sink down slowly, stopping when just the head of him is inside me. Part of me wants to rush this, but we’re playing a game. “You’re too big.”
“Getting cold feet, birthday girl?” His grip tightens on my hip and he pulls me another inch down his length. I whimper. Devan works me another inch down his cock. God, he’s huge. The fit is uncomfortable, and if I didn’t like a little pain with my pleasure, it might be too much. “I should stop,” he growls. Another inch. “Tell me to stop.”
“Stop,” I say immediately. It comes out more like a question.
Devan meets my gaze in the mirror. I can clearly read his expression. Stop doesn’t mean stop. Red means stop. I give a little nod and he yanks me another inch down his cock. “I can’t stop. You feel too good. You can take a little more, can’t you?”
“Yes,” I sob out.
He keeps working me down his length, one slow inch at a time. His words get rougher with each second that ticks past. “Flaunting this hot little body in front of the entire bar. Practically inviting someone to stick their cock in you. To fuck right there in front of everyone. Would you like that?” He grabs my other hip and slams me the rest of the way down, sheathing himself entirely.
I cry out and writhe, though I can’t tell if I’m trying to get closer to trying to get away. He’s so impossibly deep. It’s like his cock is possessing me, marking me as his in way I don’t know how to deal with. “No. Just you.”
“That’s right. Just me.” His grip eases a little bit and he skates his hands up my sides to cup my breasts. “It doesn’t matter what other cocks you ride, birthday girl. No one is going to fuck you as deep as me. This pussy is mine now. It always will be.” He tugs the straps of my swimsuit, loosening them enough to pull my top off, and then repeating the process with my bottoms.
I stare at our reflections. I look exactly like the little slut I feel. Naked against his clothed body. Heat lances me and I relax into it. The fit of him inside me eases a little, edging into pure pleasure. I shiver. “It feels good.”
“It’s going to feel better.” He lifts a hand to press two fingers to my lips. I suck him deep, and his cock pulses inside me. Devan takes his wet fingers and lightly strokes my clit.
He’s right. It does feel better.
With every little circle he traces, I lose another layer of coherency. I forget we’re playing a game. I forget that this is temporary. I forget everything but reaching the pinnacle. “More.” I lean back against his shoulder and focus on riding his cock as much as he’ll allow. He keeps me pinned down, keeps himself sheathed to the hilt as he pushes me closer and closer to orgasm. “More,” I cry.
“Greedy girl.” He releases my hip. “You want more? Take it.”
I immediately lean forward and brace myself on his thick thighs. I can’t lift myself entirely off his cock, and I have the borderline hysterical thought that he could keep me pinned like this indefinitely. My feet barely touch the ground. All he’d have to do is spread his thighs a little more and I’d be completely at his mercy until his body gives out.
Even the little friction I manage on my own, lifting myself a few inches off him and slamming back down, nearly makes my eyes roll back in my head. “Oh god.”
“Not god, Hazel. Me.” He keeps up those devastating strokes to my clit, easily matching my pace. “Tell me who this pussy belongs to.”
“Devan,” I moan. “Yours. It’s yours. I’m yours.”
“That’s right.” His voice goes rougher yet. “That’s fucking right. Now come all over my cock like the little slut you are.”
I keep fucking him as much as I’m able, and he keeps at my clit. I look at myself in the mirror. From this angle, I can’t see where we’re joined properly, and I suddenly want to. I want to see his massive girth disappear into my pussy. I want to watch my body take him, inch by unending inch. I drag in a breath. “I want you to fuck me again, Devan.”
“I’m fucking you right now.”
“Again,” I repeat. “But I want to film it. Watching is so hot, I want to keep it forever.”
He pauses. For one breathless moment, I think I’ve somehow gone too far, but then Devan bands an arm around my waist and surges up. He was letting me control everything before, but that’s over now. He fucks up into me and even with the restricted mobility of this position, I feel entirely owned by him.
I come so hard, I shriek. Devan barely hesitates. He lifts me off him and switches our position, tumbling me onto the couch and kneeling between my thighs. He guides his cock back into me and uses his palms to press my legs up and out, holding me open for him as he fucks me. “This is what you want to see.”
I stare down to where we’re joined. His cock saws into me, unbelievably big, my orgasm soaking both of us. “Yes,” I gasp. “More.”
“So fucking greedy. So demanding. You sure you’re a virgin, birthday girl? Because you take this cock like you’ve done this before.” He picks up his pace, borderline pounding into me. “Just. Have. To. Get. Deeper.” Devan surges forward and I swear to god I feel him in the back of my throat.
I come again. This time, there’s no shriek. I make a choked sound and my body clenches so hard my brain shorts out. He curses and pulls out, jacking his cock in rough, furious movements. On the second stroke, he orgasms, his come lashing my lower stomach and pussy. Devan gives one last stroke and then drags his cock down my slit.
I can’t stop shaking. “Holy shit,” I whisper. “Holy shit.”
Devan’s exhale sounds just as shaky as my body. “Yeah.” He meets my gaze. “You okay?”
“Okay?” I blink slowly. It feels like my words are being pulled through taffy. “I don’t think okay is the word. I think I just had an out-of-body experience.”
His expression eases and he shakes his head. “That about sums it up. Don’t move.”
“Couldn’t even if I wanted to.”
He leverages himself to his feet, tucks his cock away, and heads in the direction of the bedroom. I lift my head enough to look at myself in the mirror. My body looks as deliciously boneless as I feel, slumped against the couch with my legs spread and Devan’s come all over my pussy.
Just…wow.
Am I really going to survive five—no, four—more times of this?
More, how the hell is normal sex supposed to measure up to this? He might have been saying all that in the heat of the moment, driven on by the fantasy, but that doesn’t make any of it less true. Devan might really have just ruined me for other partners.
I close my eyes and let my head fall back against the couch. It’s too late to worry about it now. If it ends up being the case, then starting tomorrow I’ll just do what I’ve always done.
Pick up all my broken pieces and keep moving.
Chapter 10
Devan reappears a few minutes later with a warm wet washcloth in his hand. He cleans me up methodically and then gathers me into his arms and resumes his seat with me in his lap. I relax against him and let the beat of his heart soothe me; it draws me back into my body, steady thump by steady thump. I like this nearly as much as the sex, though I’ll be damned before I admit it.
“That got a little out of control,” Devan finally says.
I lift my head and look at him. “You have a virgin kink. Who knew?”
He holds my gaze. “I’m rapidly coming to realize I have a Hazel kink.”
My whole body goes hot and my mind veers into static. “What?” Surely he didn’t say what I think he just said. I cannot handle any non-roleplaying talk that hints at any kind of permanence. When it comes down to it, Devan’s only spent a few weeks with me at sixteen that I barely remember and six nights since. If he wanted to be in my life, he would have come around more, at least after my nineteenth birthday.
He didn’t.
Tonight is about letting go, not about starting something new. I can’t afford to forget that.
In an effort to get us back on track, I wiggle out of Devan’s arms and stand slowly. My body still feels a little loose, but I manage to keep my feet without stumbling. “On to twenty.”
“Hazel.”
I hold up a hand. “Look, if you want to talk about anything that isn’t fucking my brains out, do you think it can wait until morning?” His eyes go flinty, but I push on. “I’ve been fantasizing about this for a really long time, and I don’t want something as messy as reality to intrude. Please, Devan.”
After a long moment, he nods. “If that’s what you want.”
“It is.” I think. Then again, I thought I had a clear view of what I wanted when I put all this into motion. I didn’t expect Devan to lean into the dirtiness of the fantasies and then shove them into an entirely new realm of sexiness. I clear my throat. “I’m going to change.”
He watches me for a long moment. “Okay.”
I try to tell myself I’m not fleeing the room as I hurry back into the bedroom and grab my bag. Except it does feel like fleeing. Like hiding. What if he wants something more? I shut that thought down really fast. I can’t afford to hope. Better to play through this alternate history sequence and leave it at that.
I have to drag a comb through my hair to get out the tangles from Devan’s hands, and then I dress quickly. I made a few changes to the costume I wore to the party on my twentieth birthday. It’s the same sinfully short pleated plaid skirt and tied-up white top, but I left off the bra and changed out the bikini style panties for a sheer white thong. I’ve put on some weight in muscle in the last five years, so now the skirt doesn’t fully cover my ass and gives taunting peeks to my panties in the front as I move. The shirt is thin enough to see my nipples through. I finish off the look by pulling my hair up into pigtails like I had it that night.
I take a deep breath and head back into the living room. I barely make it two steps through the doorway before Devan grabs me, wrapping a big hand around my forearm and practically carrying me to the small bathroom off the dining room. He shoves me inside and follows me in, slamming the door behind him. “What. The. Fuck?”
I blink as he turns on the light. “Devan? What are you doing here?”
“You don’t get to ask questions, birthday girl.” He sounds absolutely furious. “Not after you disappeared without a single fucking word to me last year.”
Something goes a little funny in my head. Of course we’re playing it like this. Of course this alternate history is consistent. Of course I would have snuck off without saying a single fucking word to Devan if he fucked me at nineteen the way he did just a short time ago. “There was nothing to talk about.”
“Oh, I think there’s plenty to talk about.” He leans against the door and crosses his arms over his chest. “Did you put on that slutty outfit hoping I’d show up again this year?”
“Of course not.”
“You better be lying.” His gaze drags over me slowly, lingering on the top and skirt. “I don’t give a damn who you fuck the rest of the year, Hazel. But that pussy is mine on your birthday. So you had better not have been planning to give my pussy to one of those frat boys at this party.”
My heart speeds up. I lick my lips. “Why stop at one? Maybe I was going to give it to all of them.”
I don’t know what I expect, but he laughs. The sound isn’t happy, and the hint of cruelty in it makes my thighs clench. “I was going to do right by you.”
“Excuse me?”
He continues as if he didn’t hear me. “I was going to take you somewhere tonight and give it to you properly. But after that comment, I changed my mind.” He pushes off the door. “I’m going to fuck you in this dirty bathroom like the little slut you are. I’m going to make you scream so loud, all those frat boys outside the door can hear you and know you’re getting dicked down in a way they couldn’t begin to accomplish.”
I hold up my hands. “Devan, wait. Let’s talk about this.”
But he’s done talking. Again, I get more than a hint of anger as he crosses the distance between us in one single stride and grabs me. I barely get a squawk out when he lifts me onto the counter and steps between my legs. “Look at that,” he murmurs. “Your pussy is there, on display. You really were flashing that invitation at anyone who dared look.”
He brushes his fingers along the hem of my skirt where it’s fallen up against my waist. “A school girl.” His gaze flicks to mine. “Are you trying to remind me that you’re my ward?”
“I’m twenty. I’m not your ward.”
“You sure as fuck are.” He drags his knuckles over my pussy. “I took care of your pussy last year, and I’m going to do the same this year.”
