For Once In My Life, page 1
PRAISE FOR Time After Time
‘Heart-warming … an enjoyable read that will be warmly welcomed by fans of Australian romance writing.’ —Canberra Weekly
‘Karly Lane has a way of dragging you in and making you feel like you are a part of the story … It is a wonderful read.’
—Beauty and Lace
‘Lane vividly evokes Australian rural communities, and gives due recognition to its challenges, especially for farmers. Written with the warmth, humour and heart for which Lane’s rural romances are known, Time After Time is an engaging read.’ —Book’d Out
PRAISE FOR Wish You Were Here
‘A comely rural romance that encapsulates the heart and emotions of Australian country life … You can’t go wrong with a Karly Lane novel and this latest one was no exception. —Mrs B’s Book Reviews
‘It’s always a great day when a new Karly Lane book is released … Wish You Were Here has all the small town country vibes you could want in a closed door romance with a whole lot of heart.’ —Noveltea Corner
‘… a fabulous rural romance, the perfect book to snuggle up with on the recliner! Loved it.’ —Mrs G’s Bookshelf
‘With the magic of country atmosphere, a cast of incredible characters … true community spirit and a relatable romance, it has all the contents of an engaging read. You can smell the way of life, feel the weather and breathe in the fresh air as Karly’s inviting storytelling comes to life from the pages.’ —HappyValley BooksRead
PRAISE FOR A Stone's Throw Away
‘Fans will not be disappointed and new readers are likely to be converted … those looking for romance, suspense or contemporary novels will all find something to enjoy.’ —Beauty and Lace
‘With its appealing characters, well-crafted setting and layered storyline, A Stone’s Throw Away is an entertaining read.’
—Book’d Out
‘Karly Lane has delivered a wonderfully immersive novel with a highly engaging plot, gripping suspense and compelling twists. A Stone’s Throw Away is a story of courage, resilience and a passion for the truth.’ —The Burgeoning Bookshelf
‘I’m always highly impressed by Lane’s ability to write compelling, entertaining and emotional storylines and weave some of Australia’s history through her stories … an absolute treat.’
—Noveltea Corner
PRAISE FOR Once Burnt, Twice Shy
‘Well written, and bravely done … Once Burnt, Twice Shy is Karly Lane’s best yet, celebrating the power of community working to support one another in terrible calamity.’ —Blue Wolf Reviews
‘Karly Lane gives it her all in Once Burnt, Twice Shy … a story of faith, courage, strength and future prospects, Lane’s eighteenth novel is a sizzling summer read.’ —Mrs B’s Book Reviews
‘This book has a huge amount of hope after loss, a wonderful read.’ —Noveltea Corner
‘Heart in mouth stuff, readers. You won’t be able to put the book down till you know what happens to Jack and Sam.’ —Australian Romance Readers
PRAISE FOR Take Me Home
‘Full of romance, humour and a touch of the supernatural, this is another engaging tale by the reliable Karly Lane.’ —Canberra Weekly Magazine
‘Such a fun read … Karly has smashed the contemporary fiction genre with Take Me Home.’ —Beauty and Lace
‘Take Me Home is a delight to read. I loved the change of scenery while still enjoying Karly Lane’s wonderful, familiar storytelling.’
—Book’d Out
PRAISE FOR Something Like This
‘Another unmissable rural romance story of pain, loss, suffering and the power of love … Karly Lane is firmly on my must-read list.’ —Beauty and Lace
‘There is more to this narrative than rural romance; this is a multi-faceted exploration of loss, grief, families, second chances and courage … I loved this!’ —Reading, Writing and Riesling
‘An engaging story, set at a gentle pace, told with genuine warmth for her characters and setting, Something Like This is a lovely and eminently satisfying read.’ —Book’d Out
PRAISE FOR Fool Me Once
‘Fool Me Once is a guaranteed perfect light read … Karly Lane has woven a delicious tale of lust, love, betrayal, consequences and chasing dreams.’ —Blue Wolf Reviews
‘With its appealing characters, easy pace and happy ending, I found Fool Me Once to be another engaging and satisfying rural romance novel.’ —Book’d Out
‘Karly Lane’s affinity for the land shines through in her stories … Fool Me Once is a feel-good story not to be missed.’ —The Burgeoning Bookshelf
Karly Lane lives on the beautiful mid-North Coast of New South Wales, and she is the proud mum of four children and an assortment of four-legged animals.
Before becoming an author, Karly worked as a pathology collector. Now, after surviving three teenage children and with one more to go, she’s confident she can add referee, hostage negotiator, law enforcer, peacekeeper, ruiner-of-social-lives, driving instructor and expert-at-silently-counting-to-ten to her resume.
When she isn’t at her keyboard, Karly can be found hanging out with her beloved horses and dogs, happily ignoring the housework.
Karly writes Rural and Women’s Fiction set in small country towns, blending contemporary stories with historical heritage. She is a passionate advocate for rural Australia, with a focus on rural communities and current issues. She has published over twenty books with Allen & Unwin.
ALSO BY KARLY LANE
North Star
Morgan’s Law
Bridie’s Choice
Poppy’s Dilemma
Gemma’s Bluff
Tallowood Bound
Second Chance Town
Third Time Lucky
If Wishes Were Horses
Six Ways to Sunday
Someone Like You
The Wrong Callahan
Mr Right Now
Return to Stringybark Creek
Fool Me Once
Something Like This
Take Me Home
Once Burnt, Twice Shy
A Stone’s Throw Away
Wish You Were Here
Time After Time
First published in 2023
Copyright © Karlene Lane 2023
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without prior permission in writing from the publisher. The Australian Copyright Act 1968 (the Act) allows a maximum of one chapter or 10 per cent of this book, whichever is the greater, to be photocopied by any educational institution for its educational purposes provided that the educational institution (or body that administers it) has given a remuneration notice to the Copyright Agency (Australia) under the Act.
Allen & Unwin
Cammeraygal Country
83 Alexander Street
Crows Nest NSW 2065
Australia
Phone: (61 2) 8425 0100
Email: info@allenandunwin.com
Web: www.allenandunwin.com
Allen & Unwin acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Country on which we live and work. We pay our respects to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Elders, past and present.
ISBN 978 1 76106 612 2
eISBN 978 1 76118 814 5
Typesetter: Bookhouse, Sydney
Cover design: Mika Tabata
Cover photographs: Shutterstock (sky, background); Stocksy/Gabi Bucataru (model); Alamy (inn)
To all the women who still get a shock when it comes to saying your age out loud and wondering how it’s possible to suddenly be this old! Pause for a moment and take in everything that’s come before: the first loves; the marriages; the children; the first school days; the tears and the teenage tantrums. The endless running around and fixing everyone else’s problems. The divorces, the heartaches and the grief. The losses and the victories. The friends we’ve made and the ones we’ve lost along the way.
Now look forward and don’t be afraid. This is our time to find the things that truly matter to us. Be proud. Be fierce. Be true to yourself. The greatest times are still ahead.
CONTENTS
COVER PAGE
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
ALSO BY THE AUTHOR
TITLE PAGE
COPYRIGHT PAGE
DEDICATION
ONE
TWO
THREE
FOUR
FIVE
SIX
SEVEN
EIGHT
NINE
TEN
ELEVEN
TWELVE
THIRTEEN
FOURTEEN
FIFTEEN
SIXTEEN
SEVENTEEN
EIGHTEEN
NINETEEN
TWENTY
TWENTY-ONE
TWENTY-TWO
TWENTY-THREE
TWENTY-FOUR
TWENTY-FIVE
TWENTY-SIX
TWENTY-SEVEN
TWENTY-EIGHT
TWENTY-NINE
THIRTY
THIRTY-ONE
THIRTY-TWO
THIRTY-THREE
THIRTY-FOUR
THIRTY-FIVE
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
One
Jenny Hayward flopped down on the lounge chair, kicked off her shoes and closed her eyes as she let out a slow breath. Home. The silence of the house was like a soothing balm to the hectic pace of
the hospital. It’d been a long day—a long two years, if she were being honest. That was when her husband of twenty-seven years had announced he was moving out.
Lost in the shock and pain of his betrayal, Jenny had turned the house into her sanctuary, doing a clean-out of anything she didn’t find comforting or calming. Her best friend, Beth—dark-haired, Italian-Maltese—became a slightly more intimidating version of the decluttering queen, Marie Kondo, as she held open a garbage bag and barked, ‘Does it bring you joy? No? Well chuck it!’ In a couple of days, they’d transformed the house. It had been nothing short of a miracle.
Jenny had never been a big believer in the whole crystals and energy hocus-pocus the way Beth was, but weary and heartsick, she couldn’t have summoned the strength to protest even if she’d wanted to when Beth had told her to ‘leave everything to me’.
As far as makeovers went, there hadn’t been anyone better qualified for the job. Beth had always had a knack for decorating and had done a course, intending to one day turn her talent into a business. She’d filled Jenny’s house with soft furnishings, scattered soothing colours about the rooms and added little touches—a plant here, a Buddha statue there and, of course, her signature crystal-infused candles, which she’d begun making during Covid and had become a booming success.
‘When you’ve been knocked down, bloodstone will pick you back up,’ she’d said, then had placed little pottery bowls of tourmaline near the front and back doors and lit a candle, carrying it through the house like a priest performing an exorcism. ‘This will flush out all the negative vibes and allow the good stuff back in,’ she’d explained as a delicious scent of sage, black tea and bergamot filled the room. In Jenny’s bedroom, she’d scattered amethyst, informing her that it would relieve stress and anxiety and promote a chill vibe for sleeping.
And there’d been more. Beth had placed her candles infused with their healing crystals in every nook and cranny, and as much as Jenny—a level-headed, science-based nurse—wanted to scoff at the ridiculousness of the idea, she’d found herself noticeably calmer and the house, which had always been full of the eggshells she’d been walking on, suddenly felt like a home. Of course, the candles smelled gorgeous, but maybe there was something in the whole crystal thing, because now her house was a haven and she loved coming home to it at the end of a long shift.
Sometimes it seemed hard to believe the split had been that long ago. Austin had been her life for so long. They’d had a reasonably happy marriage, getting married young and starting a family. Jenny had always wanted a brood of children, but Austin—ever practical—had declared that two kids were all they could afford. Deep down, she’d known he was right. After all, she’d had her hands full with an almost-two-year-old and a newborn. As the girls grew older, she’d learned to ignore the little whimper inside whenever they passed by a baby in the shopping centre. It was silly—she was far too busy for any more children, she’d remind herself.
After Brittany started school and she only had Savannah at home, Austin began to hint at Jenny going back to work. His income as a salesman in a white goods store wasn’t stretching all that far and raising two children on a single wage was never going to get them where they were hoping to go. The only job she’d ever had was as a check-out chick in a grocery store from when she’d left school up until going on maternity leave with Brittany, and as much as she’d enjoyed the job and the people she’d worked with, it had been almost five years and everyone she’d known had moved on. She wanted to do something different, only she wasn’t sure what exactly. Austin hadn’t been overly sympathetic when she’d brought up her concerns. ‘It’s not like you’ve had any burning ambitions to have a career or anything. We just need something that brings in a pay cheque.’ Which she had to grudgingly admit was true, but it did nothing to still that growing restlessness she was noticing inside. All she was any good at was having babies. She loved being a mother, but unfortunately, you didn’t get paid for that, so she knew she needed to start thinking seriously about what would bring in a pay cheque—and what she’d enjoy doing.
In the end, the answer had arrived in the form of her aunty, who’d commented on how short-staffed the hospital system was and that Jenny should think about becoming a nurse.
‘But I didn’t even finish high school,’ Jenny had said.
‘You can go in as a mature student. Do a bridging course and enrol in university. You’d make a great nurse.’
Jenny had chewed the idea over in her head for a while. It hadn’t crossed her mind before. She wasn’t sure why; her aunty was a nurse and she had multiple cousins who were nurses, but she’d always considered herself not quite smart enough to do anything that would require getting a degree.
She’d brought it up with Austin, who’d laughed, then sobered at the look on her face. ‘How would we afford university? That’s a lot of money for something you didn’t even want to do before today.’
‘I wasn’t planning on enrolling right now,’ she snapped, hurt by his lack of encouragement, which immediately caused all her insecurities to resurface. ‘It was just an idea.’
She handed her resume to the local supermarket the next day and managed to pick up a few hours a week. She put Savannah into day care for the days she worked, hating every minute of it. Guilt became Jenny’s constant companion. She felt guilty that she was putting her child in day care when she should be at home looking after her. She felt guilty that she resented her husband for making her go back to work so early when she knew the money would help out enormously. She felt guilty for hating a job she was lucky to have when there were people who didn’t have one. The guilt went on and on, draining her energy and making her miserable.
Eventually, she’d brought up the nursing idea over coffee with Beth, who’d encouraged her to enrol in a bridging course so she could think about university in the future if she still wanted to. Jenny didn’t tell Austin. What if she failed? What if she couldn’t even get over this first hurdle?
What if you can? her little voice of reason piped up helpfully.
Jenny studied and submitted her assignments and, to her surprise, she was passing—not only passing, but doing better than she’d ever done at school. She discovered she was enjoying it. Her! Enjoying study? It was crazy. Managing to keep her newly acquired diploma a secret, by the end of the year she’d worked up the courage to apply to university to see what happened. To her shock, Jenny was accepted into a nursing degree.
Telling Austin hadn’t been as bad as she’d been anticipating, at least not once she’d assured him she could get a student loan to cover her fees, and so there she was, sitting in a lecture room, surrounded by other people like her—some older, most younger—but other people excited to be taking this next step and forging themselves a bright path into a new career. She’d never felt more alive.
It’d been a crazy time, juggling two small children and study, but she’d managed with Beth lending a hand to babysit and cheer her on. Her graduation had been the proudest day of her life, with her family travelling to be there and Austin accepting all the congratulations and admiration about how difficult it must have been for them all to have taken such a huge thing on. She’d put aside her irritation, deciding not to bring up the countless arguments they’d had over the time, when he’d occasionally had to cook his own dinner or heaven forbid, find his work clothes in the folding when she’d been struggling to meet a deadline.
Jenny gave a small smile. Back then she’d had so many big plans.
After that, life finally started to get easier. The girls were a little older and both in school. She loved her job and the people she worked with and the extra income—nothing outrageously wonderful—but enough to allow them to move into a bigger house with a backyard and room to grow. Austin had scored a job with a large firm and had his sights set a lot higher than being a white goods salesman. He seemed happier than he’d been in a long time.
Then one day she found herself staring down at two red lines on a pregnancy test.
It wasn’t that she didn’t want another baby, it was just that their lives had moved on from nappies and toilet training. Brittany was eight and Savannah was six and now she’d be going back to breastfeeding and sleepless nights after taking for granted the fact that she’d finally got both children sleeping in their own beds.
