Naughty Neuro, page 8
I feel like I’m Bella, just Bella and no one else.
In this moment I feel cherished.
Neither of us speak for a while. I’m just lying listening to his heartbeat and breathing. The poor guy is probably dying in need of relief, yet he hasn’t moved an inch. I know I can’t lie here forever, even if I want to.
“Tate?”
“Yes, Tink?” His voice echoes through his chest as he speaks.
“Is that what it’s always like with you?” I don’t know what made me ask it, but I need to know.
“Nope, each time it’ll get better.” He laughs which makes me move up and down with his chest moving.
“So, do I need to rate your sexual skills each time?” Smiling, I can imagine the cheeky smirk on his face.
“How did I just rate then, Tink?” he asks like he’s expecting me to give a stupid answer. Little does he know I have little to compare it to, so for me he is the benchmark.
“Definitely a ten.” I lift my head a little to look up at him.
He has that proud look on his face, like someone who’s won a prize.
“Baby, if you think that was a ten then you better hold on for the ride. You ain’t felt nothing yet.” I roll my eyes at him as his ego comes out to play, and he laughs at me.
Trying to lay my head back down on his chest, his hand comes up under my chin to stop me.
“Bella, we need to talk, don’t you agree?” I know I can’t ignore this, and as much as I want to stay in this post-orgasmic bubble, it has to break sometime.
I nod reluctantly as he reaches for my robe and starts to pull it back around me to cover my body.
“Can’t concentrate while looking at your smoking-hot body. Not sure I’ll ever be able to forget that image of you in the virginal white robe.” I stiffen at the words he has just spoken. “What’s wrong? I can feel you tensing.” I can’t tell him the truth. Not yet. I’m not ashamed of it, I just need the right time to tell him and now is definitely not the right time.
“Um, I’m just nervous about what you’re going to say.” That’s all I can come up with. Meanwhile, my nerves are still trying to settle. One day he will hopefully understand how important it was to me to save myself for him. I know it’s different for him. He was sleeping with girls long before he would have even been looking at me in that way. For me, it was so different. From the time my hormones kicked in, it’s only ever been him.
“Bella, there’s no need to feel nervous with me.” Stroking his finger over my cheek, I shiver with the sensation while he smiles at my reaction.
“I don’t even know where to start. Your brother is going to kill me. I know without a doubt. Considering he warned us all on your eighteenth birthday you were off limits to us, then again, last Friday night. Apparently if I hurt you, he will knock me out or kill me, either or.
Laughing, I set him straight. “Tate, if you hurt me, Grayson is the last person you need to worry about. He can stand in line behind me. I will castrate you and string your balls up on the flagpole at the hospital. Just so everyone knows that the man-whore has finally met his match.” I’m not sure where that came from, but I’m glad I said it. I mean every word of it. I haven’t waited all this time to be played like the rest of the women in the hospital.
“Fuck, Bella, lucky I never intend on hurting you, because I know how serious you are with that threat. I personally like my balls where they are, and if you give me time, I think you will enjoy them just as much. So, can we just move past that thought for the moment?” This is what I like about my relationship with Tate. We’re able to have the most serious conversation, only to break the tension with pure stupidity, and then pick up where we left off.
“I’ll hold you to that. Both the never-hurt-me part and the balls I’m meeting and having a party.” Tate bursts out laughing. It feels good to lighten the moment a little.
“In all seriousness, Bella, we need to talk about Grayson. I’ve never lied to my best friend. I know it’s for a good reason, but I’m going to struggle with this. So will you. The two of you are super close. I’m telling you now, I can do it for a little while, but you need to work it out fast so we can make a plan where we can tell him everything. Including how you think I’m a super stud in bed.”
“Oh geez, is there anywhere you don’t take your ego with you?” I question him half-jokingly and half-serious.
“Nope, I’ve told you before. I have a big ego and it matches my big dick. Both are with me wherever I go. You’ll get over it, and I can promise you will not only learn to love it, you’ll be wanting to see all my large things on show all the time.”
“You are so full of shit, Tate, you know that?”
“Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve been told that, baby.” He leans forward and kisses me quickly on the lips and then pulls away.
“Good to know I’m not the only one with that opinion then.”
“Getting back on track. Your brother. We need to set a timeframe for this. It’s going to be bad enough when he finds out, but if we’ve kept it from him for too long, it could be the thing that pushes him over the edge. I know you don’t want to hurt him, and neither do I.” Tate’s voice is full of compassion.
“Hurting the brother who has given a large part of his life to make sure I’m safe and loved is the last thing I want to do. But maybe it would be enough for him to finally back away from thinking he gets to have a say in everything in my life. I’m a grown woman. I don’t need him anymore,” I say, trying to make Tate see it from my point of view. “Grayson isn’t the only one. I’m telling you now. If you think you can take a bigger part of my life and walk in and take over where Grayson left off, you can find the door now and walk straight through it. I’m done being the vulnerable little sister. I just want you to see me as Bella.” By the time I get to the end of my words, there’s a quiver in my voice from the raw emotion I’m exposing. I’ve never really told him how much this eats at me. Perhaps I didn’t even realize it until just now.
“Let’s get one thing very clear right now. From the time you turned eighteen, I have seen nothing but you, Bella. Have I been a painful pretend big brother so I could still be near you and keep you safe? Absolutely! Did I scare off any man that came near you over the years? Damn right I did, and I won’t apologize one bit for that. Have I gone to bed many nights with a cock as hard as steel because of some skimpy tight outfit or a bikini you had paraded in front of me? Damn straight, and it was painful to the point I jerked myself off to you. But not for one moment did I see anything other than you, Arabella Garrett, my Tinkerbella. You’re all I’ve ever really seen. All the rest has just been a distraction.”
Tate’s words shock me at how honest and raw he is. He has been so good at hiding how he feels that I had no idea. The times I wondered what it would be like for him to notice that extra-tight top I’d put on just for him, or the extra effort I’d gone to with my hair, only to be disappointed that he hadn’t made one comment or even looked in my direction.
“I never knew. I wish I had, but then again, I wasn’t ready then. I doubt you would’ve been either.” I say, picturing eighteen-year-old me with twenty-eight-year old Tate who was out living the good life while I was just about to start university. “We were mismatched then, but now I can’t find one good reason why we can’t do this. Perhaps the timing is not quite perfect even now, but I still want to try.”
“This is happening, Tink, I’m done giving a fuck about timing. I want you, and from what I’m feeling and hearing, I’m pretty sure you want me, too.”
I don’t know how to handle his directness in relation to me. Just keeping it simple, I answer the best way I can. “I do, god yes, I do. I’m done pretending.” Grabbing his face between my hands, I kiss him for the first time on my own, without him making the first move. God, it feels good. “For so long I’ve wanted to do that. So many times, I’d talk myself into doing it, only to stop before I even made a move.”
His laugh is so deep and seeps into my soul. “Except for that one time on your twenty-first birthday when you came so close.” He looks at me with that smile that lights up my world.
“Yeah, until you spoiled the party and stopped me after I poured out my deepest feelings to you.”
“Ahh, so you do remember everything you did that night.” Tate jumps on the revelation.
Shit, shit, shit.
For the last four years, I’ve denied remembering that night. But I always suspected he knew.
“This woman can neither confirm nor deny. Let’s leave it at that.” We both let out a little laugh.
“My biggest concern is not Grayson, it’s the hospital and my rotation. You’re my boss, Tate. We can’t possibly have a relationship while I’m learning under you.” The happiness that’s been building is dampened by the thought.
“Oh, you’ll be learning under me, that’s for sure, and for the record, I can’t wait. That part has nothing to do with work. Now in relation to the hospital, it’s none of their business what I do in my private life.” Tate speaks like he makes the rules.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Tate. You know we would be breaking protocol and breaching every rule in the book for anyone to believe you are grading me impartially. I’ve worked too hard to become the doctor I am only to have it all fall apart at the last minute. I know we are important, and we have waited long enough, but to me, being a doctor is who I am. Just like you, it’s what we bleed through our veins. We can’t do this relationship anywhere except within these walls. In the hospital I am Doctor Arabella Garrett, and you will treat me just like all your other minions. Then around our friends, I’m just Bella to you.” I pause when I see the frustration in his face. “But here, I can be whoever you want me to be. Do you agree?”
He’s silent for a moment, thinking about what I’ve said.
“I would never do anything to jeopardize your career, you have to know that, Bella. You are going to be an amazing specialist, and I’m going to do everything I can to help you get there. To be honest, I don’t give a damn what our friends and your brother say.” He takes me tightly in his arms and brings his lips to my ear. “But here, with you in my arms and nearly naked… all I want you to be is mine. Just mine, it’s that simple. I’ll have you know that it’s taking all my strength not to strip you and take you to bed and fuck you so hard you won’t know who you are.” My breath races and I feel myself all wet just from his words. “You’re not ready, and I respect that, but when you are. Turn off that phone and lock that door because you aren’t leaving until we’re done and you’re completely satisfied. Deal?”
I can’t talk.
Dirty talk is new to me, and I like it.
A lot.
It’s the only thing that renders me speechless, and I think Tate’s realizing that.
“Just nod, baby, that’s all I need.”
My head obeys as he returns that smile that makes me weak. For all the years I have built up my resistance to Tate’s charm, he smashed that in less than an hour and left me weak at the knees and on the floor in a puddle of nerves.
I never thought I’d be saying this.
I’ll lay down my walls for Tate and that voice every single time.
Let’s hope he’s strong enough for the both of us.
Otherwise we’re both screwed.
6
Tate
“I KNOW YOU HAVE an early start in the morning, but can I stay a little longer? After all, we have a cold soggy pizza to eat, and you promised me a beer among several other beverages you couldn’t seem to decide between.” My smart comment earns me a smack on the arm and a laugh that lights up her whole face.
“It’s not my fault you make me all flustered.” Bella keeps laughing.
“Oh really, I love that, but perhaps only here. I still want my sassy confident Doctor Garrett in the hospital. I won’t know how to cope if you aren’t being your regular pain in the ass around me.”
“No matter where we are, that’s not going to change. For twenty years I have learned all the ways to give you shit and piss you off. I have it down to a fine art now. I can’t ruin my reputation.”
As much as I want the hot sex life with Bella, I want this just as much. The easy fun between us. That’s what’s missing in my life. That one person to share my world with. Not just the good bits or the funny ones. I need that other part of my soul who takes on my bad parts and loves me anyway.
I already know she’s the other part of my soul. You don’t get to choose that. Now I just need to know, am I hers too?
“Is that right, my cheeky girl.” Grabbing her around the waist, I lift her off my lap and onto her feet. She’s still giggling at me while I spin her and smack her on the ass. “Beer, woman, while I try to calm my cock down from wanting to continue this little party.”
I hear a little gasp in her voice as she looks over her shoulder at me.
“That was really mean not to return the favor, wasn’t it?” The compassion in her voice is killing me.
“Absolutely, but if you even touch me right now, all bets are off at going slow. So, beer and pizza are what’s needed, and talking about something really gross or boring. Like Grayson?” Her smile and laugh as she’s venturing off towards the kitchen tell me she gets it. With her out of the room, I stand and adjust my pants. I’m still dressed in my work clothes, and they aren’t built for comfort when your cock is twice the normal size. Business pants have no stretch in them. I’ve worked that out today. I have a feeling I’m going to need to find some that do stretch, if I’m going to be working closely with Bella and not be allowed to touch her or even discuss anything except work.
“You’re lucky Gray keeps some beer here for when he visits with Memphis.” She passes me a bottle already open. I notice her robe is now all neat and tied nice and tightly around her waist. Bella sees me watching her.
“Would you prefer I be wearing more clothes?” she asks, trying to pretend she’s innocent.
“Not helping in the land of pain, you little vixen.” Besides, all my mind is thinking of the old expression my nana would say, ‘Less is more.’ Good one, Nana, you were spot on.
“Fair enough. I’ll get changed. Stay here.”
“I don’t plan on moving anytime soon. But yes, that would be immensely appreciated.” As I take the first mouthful of my beer, the feel of it sliding down my throat is heaven. I didn’t think it was possible to feel that many emotions in one day. Exhaustion is starting to kick in. I’m used to working long hours under intense pressure. Including dealing with the worry for my patients. Yet mixing all that in with one hot woman who is playing with my heart, and I’m done for the night.
While I’m waiting for Bella, I message the hospital to check on Madeline. I just want to know she’s still stable. Kids have fight in them, but sometimes it’s just not enough. Let’s hope this little one can hold on for the next few days so I can finally see her open her eyes. I know Bella loves to work with kids, but for me, give me an adult any day. The kids pull on my heart, even though not many believe I have one.
“That better?” Bella says, walking back in wearing sweatpants and a loose shirt, but no goddamn bra. This woman is trying to kill my cock. Sorry, fella, I’m trying, but she keeps taunting us with her sexiness.
“Marginally,” I grunt, and she smiles that cheeky look that tells me she knows exactly what she’s doing.
“You’ll survive, now let’s eat.” Plonking herself down on the couch next to me this time, she picks up the pizza box off the floor where it landed. Thankfully the right way up.
“I might, but my cock said to tell you he’s hanging by a thread.” I take another mouthful of my beer and watch her blush, and I know I’m going to enjoy getting these reactions from her.
Three pieces of cold pizza later and my beer finished, Bella is yawning for the tenth time in the last five minutes. I know I should be leaving but having her laying with her head in my lap and just talking about what she observed and learned today is perfect. My fingers play in her hair and my other arm is stretched across her chest while she has her hands wrapped around it. The more I stroke her head, the more her eyelids close.
“I need to go home so you can sleep, Tink.” She looks up at me with disappointment but also agreement.
“I’m sorry. Today was intense. I’m trying to stay awake, but you have me so relaxed I’m struggling.”
“There’ll be many more nights like this, Bella. Remember, though, we both understand how important it is to be on the ball at work. For that, you need sleep. Come on, up you hop and off to bed. I hear your new boss is such a hard guy to please and he loves to punish the new interns. Talk in the hospital is he’s actually an asshole. You better be on your toes tomorrow to please him.”
“Oh great. Can’t wait. Wonder who will be his first victim?” she says, rolling her eyes at me as we stand at the same time.
“That’s the excitement of the game, no one knows.” Taking her in my arms, there is something I need her to understand before I leave. “Bella, I need you to listen to me. Besides not letting anyone at the hospital know about us and me treating you just like the others, I want you to know this. I will push you and I’ll be mean, as well you’ll be hating me at times. On those days just remember my job is to train you to be the best possible doctor you can be. Nothing will ever be personal, and if you have to come home and scream, know that five minutes later I will be coming through that door behind you and I’ll promise to make it better. Okay?”
Her nod as I’m talking already tells me we’re on the same page, but before I leave, she puts me at ease by saying, “Just remember I’m the one from the beginning who said I just want you to treat me the same as every other doctor. So, when it gets tough, just remind me of that. Then be prepared for the neck and back massage I’ll accept as an apology for being a prick, and if you really excel at assholism, there will need to be a foot massage too.”
