Behind the Scenes, page 27
Ash smiled. Rose’s heart swelled with tenderness.
“All eight of them,” Ash said, like she wasn’t sure she was allowed to make a joke but desperately wanted to make Rose laugh.
“But if you and I are together, I will die with someone I love and be eaten by our pugs together. That’s four pugs to eat each of us.”
“I love you.” Ash clasped Rose’s hands to her chest. “I love you.”
“You should.” Rose brushed her lips across Ash’s. “I’m fabulous.”
Ash laughed. “You absolutely are.”
“And I love you, Ashlyn Stewart. So much.”
“We would have had fun working on that film,” Ash said. “The way you edited the proof of concept. God. It was amazing.” Ash let out a long sigh. “What would it have been like if I’d said yes?”
“The crew would be drunk by now.”
“If I wasn’t hung up on everything that happened…If I’d had time to think…” Ash rolled onto her back staring at the ceiling.
Excitement sparked in Rose’s heart. Should she ask? “If you’d had time to think, what would you have thought?”
“If you didn’t have to give up Cherry Covered Apron and if we talked about how we were going to make sure work didn’t interfere with us…yeah.” Ash closed her eyes as though searching for the answer behind her eyelids. “I would’ve said yes. But never if you had to give Brentworth all your stuff.”
Don’t rush her. It was hard. Rose’s heart was rushing. “You would have wanted to work together on Inevitable Comfort?”
“I would have been scared.” Ash didn’t open her eyes. “But yeah. God, that film would be beautiful with you doing sound.”
Rose rolled onto her back, too. She took Ash’s hand and waited several beats. “I don’t want you to say yes if your heart says no, but if you wanted to we could still do it.”
“Without the funding?”
“We call Brentworth back and ask for more money.”
Ash turned, looking adorably confused, and Rose was happier to explain business than she’d ever been before.
“We’re bargaining.” Rose rolled onto her side, propping herself up on one elbow. “She should have gone for the twenty million. Now we know she wants the film, and we want fifty, and she gets a ten percent share of Cherry Covered Apron when I monetize.”
“Would she go for it?”
“She would.” Rose tapped her own chest. “Best consultant west of the Rockies. I know. I could call Brentworth’s office, and make the offer, and you still have time to think about it. We haven’t signed anything. And if she comes back with forty, maybe we can talk to some other producers and see if we can get a better deal. We’re not taking any paltry twenty million.”
“That’s what we asked for.”
“Details.” Rose kissed Ash. “I love that you accidentally played boss-ass hardball with a billionaire investor. If I read Brentworth right, she’ll like it, too. She’s not just investing in the film. She’s investing in your passion.”
The sun moved just enough to escape from behind the buildings across the street and shone into the room, turning sad-sixties-orange into sumptuous burnt umber. Ash turned to her.
“Our passion. If she invests it’s in our passion.”
Chapter 54
The beds at the Executive Comfort Suites were not the kind that had springs all the way across, or at least not springs with any spring in them. Ash didn’t mind. The sag in the bed rolled her against Rose, their bodies melting together as much as they could with Rose in a suit and Ash in a sheath dress. Ash wanted their clothing off. She wanted Rose’s breasts pressed against hers. She wanted to taste Rose. She wanted to make Rose bless this room with her cries of pleasure. She wanted to feel Rose’s hands on her back, Rose’s kiss on her neck. She throbbed but it wasn’t pain. It was the sweet, hungry feeling of being turned on and needy, wanting to linger and wanting to feel Rose’s tongue caressing the delicate folds of her sex immediately. She wanted to have sex, and if she got scared halfway through, Rose would love her just as much as ever.
Reluctantly, Rose said, “Should you text Emma and tell the crew not to start feeling bad yet?”
“I suppose I should.” Ash retrieved her phone with a sigh.
Ash: Rose thinks we may still get it. We’ll talk later.
A second later, someone pounded on the door.
“I need to know now!” It was Emma.
Ash heard Jason’s hushed, “Dude,” and Pilot’s, “Could you two be somewhat discreet? They might be enjoying sapphic love.”
“I know she’s having sex with Rose,” Emma said to Jason and Pilot but loud enough for Ash to hear. Emma knocked again, projecting her voice. “I will get a key and let myself in if you don’t answer the door. This is the kind of hotel that will give just anyone a key, and you know it.”
Rose laughed an infectious laugh that Ash couldn’t help but join.
“We’re still negotiating,” Rose called out.
“Negotiating in bed,” Emma called.
“But we’ll get it.” To Ash, Rose added, “Do we have to go out there?”
Ash’s body cried out, We need to be naked on these ten-count sheets.
Ash groaned.
“You go get a drink with them,” Rose said, “and I’ll call Brentworth’s office and my sisters. Text me where you’re all going and I’ll meet you. Promise me we’ll be back here tonight?”
“If I didn’t think Emma was right about the key, we wouldn’t leave.”
But Ash didn’t move. “What would you like me to tell them about me and you and Cherry Covered Apron?”
Rose pursed her lips thoughtfully. “Anything you like. Everything. I’m going to tell my sisters about Cherry Covered Apron. If you don’t want to tell Jason and Pilot and Emma you turned Brentworth down, you don’t have to.”
“You mean tell them I was ready to sacrifice it all for love?”
“They’d probably kill you.”
“I cheated death once already.” It was strange how easy it was to joke about the accident. “Of course I’ll tell them.”
A burger, two beers, and three hours later, Ash and Rose were back in the room. The crew hadn’t killed her. Their hearts were probably softened by the fact that before Rose even got to the little dive bar down the street, she’d gotten a message from Brentworth’s office saying Brentworth was interested. But Jason, Pilot, and Emma were artists, too, and they got it. You didn’t give away all your work. They’d toasted Rose for her self-sacrifice and Ash for playing hardball. When Ash and Emma had gone to the bar for the second round of beers, Emma had said, Even if we don’t get it, I’m glad you got Rose.
They walked back to the hotel in the twilight. Emma, Pilot, and Jason stayed behind. Rose looked beautiful set against the purple smog and the flickering streetlights, her hair messy and her blouse unbuttoned to show a hint of cleavage, the silky collar fluttering in the breeze of a passing truck. Executive Comfort Suites only got two stars on Tripadvisor and the street was a hodgepodge of businesses that could only survive because no brand-name franchises wanted to move in. And everything was perfect.
Ash took Rose’s hand. “Did you call your sisters?” Ash was glad the glow in Rose’s face didn’t fade with the question.
“Yeah.” Rose looked a little confused but mostly happy. “They weren’t mad.”
“You thought they’d be mad at you for making ASMR?”
“No, for not telling them. But Cassie said it was nice that I had a hobby, and she could sew me another apron if I needed one. Then she said something about how she didn’t tell us everything, either, and I think she was talking about kinky sex with Kenneth. Gigi looked the site up right away and said the videos were freakishly sexy, but that’s a compliment from G. Ty quoted something about gender from Leslie Feinberg. Now I feel bad for thinking telling them would be a big deal.” Rose didn’t look sad. “They said I’d helped them achieve their dreams. They said…they didn’t need me to take care of them anymore.”
“Was that hard to hear?”
“No,” Rose said pensively. “They didn’t mean they didn’t need me like a sister. They need me the way we all need each other. But Cassie said the one thing in her life that didn’t feel right was this sense she had that I wasn’t happy. And Gigi said she’d once counted up all the money I’d given her to keep the salon going when she first opened and the money I used to bail her out of jail when she had the whole Elks-club thing and how much it would have cost if she’d gotten malaria if I hadn’t made her get all the right vaccines when she traveled. She said I pretty much could sponge off her for life, and she’d still owe me.” Rose laughed. “And Ty just wants me to be in love.”
Back at the hotel, it was comfortable, laughing and taking off their shoes, but Ash still felt shy as the talk quieted into kissing. Shy and excited. Rose traced the zipper on the back of Ash’s dress.
“May I undo you?”
“You do.”
“That’s a yes?”
Ash nodded. Rose slowly unzipped the sheath dress, holding Ash’s hand as she stepped out of it. Ash felt Rose’s eyes travel up and down her body. She paused when she looked at Ash’s scars, but her gaze felt like a caress.
Ash put her hands on Rose’s soft hips, loving the feel of Rose’s curves.
“God, you’re beautiful,” Ash whispered as she kissed Rose’s neck.
“Why thank you.”
Ash slid Rose’s blazer off and placed it on a chair.
“I like your blazers,” Ash said.
“I’ll have to tell Gigi.”
Rose caressed the back of Ash’s head where her hair was shaved. Ash’s skin tingled. She leaned into Rose’s touch.
Rose led Ash to the rumpled sheets, but Rose went to her briefcase and dug around and produced a small box. “I got you a present. You don’t have to use it.” She held it out.
It was a flat, roundish vibrator that fit perfectly in Ash’s palm.
“I went to Satisfaction Guaranteed and asked them if they had something for someone who…wanted something gentle.”
The vibrators Ash had had with Victoria were bigger affairs, dildo-shaped with rabbit ears, some with suction, one that thrust. She’d enjoyed them once. She took the vibrator out and turned it on. It hummed in her hand, gentle and innocuous.
“Thank you.” When they lay down, Ash tucked it into the underwear she was still wearing. “Hmm.” She held her hand over the vibrator, pressing it against herself. “I like it.”
She kept it there as Rose lay down and they kissed for a long time. When it was clear Rose wouldn’t make another first move, Ash reached around and unclasped Rose’s bra with one hand. Rose looked at Ash for confirmation then fumbled with Ash’s bra. Ash helped her. Rose caressed Ash’s breast, rubbing a hypnotizing circle against Ash’s tightening nipple. Then she drew Ash’s nipple into her mouth.
“I want you.” Ash squirmed and sighed.
“I want you, too.” Rose kissed Ash’s belly.
Ash felt the kiss reverberate through her. “Please.”
Rose kissed down Ash’s stomach, around her hip, across the surgical scars on her thigh.
“You’re so beautiful,” Rose whispered. She spent a long time stroking Ash’s thigh until Rose’s hands gliding over her legs became sweet teasing. Ash was wet. The vibrator was a sweet frustration, buzzing against her clit but not satisfying anything.
“Stop me if it’s not right,” Rose said seriously.
Then she took the vibrator away. Ash gasped a protest at the sudden absence even though she wanted what came next. Then Rose kissed the delicate skin beside Ash’s vulva, caressing her outer labia, running them through her fingers like she was touching the petals of a flower…or chard. Everything felt lovely. Rose ran her tongue in slow circles around and around Ash’s opening. It felt amazing. Ash moaned.
“That feels good.” Ash’s breath sped up, her body soaring with pleasure. Harder. Faster. Every fiber of muscle in her body seized. Her back arched. She needed to come, and she hadn’t for so long. Was she taking too long? She was thinking too much, a jumble of images tumbled through her mind, senselessly landing on Emma’s pink bunny. Breathe in.
“I…please…now…I can’t…” She couldn’t get there. She wanted it too much. She felt brittle. She was shattering into pieces.
“I got you,” Rose whispered.
From somewhere in the sheets, Rose found the vibrator again, placed it between Ash’s thighs, and moved her own leg over Ash’s. “Yes?”
“Yes.” Ash pulled Rose on top of her, pleasure rising as Rose settled her thigh between Ash’s legs, the vibrator pressing against Ash, Rose’s full body pressing her down. She couldn’t shatter with Rose’s glorious, soft weight holding her safe and still. Rose thrust against her. Ash ran her hands through Rose’s hair, tightening her grip as Rose moved faster.
“Yes! There! Please!” She clutched Rose’s back. “I need it so bad.” She ground against Rose’s leg. The world expanded, then distilled down to a single point of pleasure. “I need you.” Then her body broke into blossom and she was floating off the screen. And when she finally sank back down, melting under Rose’s body, Ash was laughing.
“That was so good.” Tears welled in Ash’s eyes but they were tears of happiness. “I thought I’d never feel that again. And I did. I do. With you.” Ash was beaming and wiping at her eyes. “It was so fucking good. It was. So. Fucking. Good.”
Rose rolled off her, still holding all of Ash in her arms, kissing Ash’s forehead and her temple and her cheek. Ash could feel Rose’s grin.
“Don’t be smug,” Ash protested, although she loved the idea of Rose being smug because Rose had brought her to a screaming orgasm.
Rose kept kissing Ash’s face. Ash felt bathed in Rose’s love.
“I’m not smug,” Rose chuckled, sounding a tiny bit smug. “It’s just…I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy before.”
Epilogue
Rose couldn’t stop looking at Ash. She glowed in her iridescent, ripped jeans and silver-pink leather jacket and worn-so-thin-you-could-see-her-bra Human League T-shirt, every color picking up the shades of Rose’s Marianna Villard dress. Which, unlike Cinderella, she got to wear twice. They had looked magnificent striding up the Oscars red carpet, pausing for the occasional photographs. They weren’t making the cover of any tabloids, but enough people had wanted their attention that only now, at the Elsinore afterparty, were they able to say ten consecutive words to each other.
Ash sipped a peach Bellini.
“You don’t even like this stuff.” Rose kissed the hint of peach on Ash’s lips.
“But it goes so well with our outfits.” Ash put an arm around her. “You go so well with my outfit. You go so well with everything in my life.”
Rose breathed in Ash’s perfume. If someone could have bottled the essence of this night—the lights, the fame, the feeling that it was theirs for the taking and yet it had no hold on them—that’s what it would have smelled like. Rose almost asked Ash what it was. Funny that she didn’t know. She’d seen the bottle on Ash’s real-furniture dresser. There was still so much she wanted to learn about Ash and there was so much about their lives together that felt blissfully familiar. She kissed Ash.
“Come on, you two,” Mia said affectionately. “It’s time for a toast.”
The party guests quieted.
“I am so honored to host the Inevitable Comfort afterparty,” Mia said. “One of the best films I’ve ever seen.”
The party cheered.
They hadn’t been nominated for an Oscar but no one cared.
Brentworth lifted her champagne flute, her gold bracelets sliding down her birdlike wrist. “To Inevitable Comfort, a very good return on my investment.”
Even if they’d won every Oscar on the roster, it wouldn’t have made Rose as happy as she was to see Ash smile, at home and relaxed in her world, surrounded by people who recognized her gifts and loved her for her kindness and her humor.
“To our producer,” Ash returned. “And the 1.2 million people who came just to hear Rose’s voice-over.”
Rose gave a little bow. There were more toasts, hugs, handshakes, and praise. Rose’s sisters gathered around Rose and Ash.
“I can’t believe we’re here,” Cassie said, still goggling at the theater.
“Believe,” Gigi said.
“So I won’t die alone and get eaten by my pugs?” Rose shot Gigi a look.
“Did I say that?” Gigi sipped her drink innocently.
“Yes,” Rose and Cassie said in unison.
Ty would have joined in, but she’d met Emma at Ash’s studio when they’d watched the proof of concept and was now hopelessly in love with Emma which meant she couldn’t talk to her or look in her direction.
“So what’s next?” one of Ash’s old friends asked.
Ash gestured to Rose to go first. There was so much. Every ASMR conference, podcast, and production company wanted her. She was coaching a new ASMR artist and consulting for a queer history museum. Plus furnishing the apartment they’d rented in LA. And of course, basking in Ash’s success, one of Rose’s favorite new hobbies. Five producers fighting Brentworth for Ash’s next production. Ash’s latest script dancing off her fingertips as she typed late into the night. And of course, flying back and forth between LA and Portland. Assuring Muffin and Cupcake that she still loved them even though Ty had joint custody. But for now…
“We won a trip to the New Destination Resort,” Rose said. “We’re going to listen to the waves and drink tropical drinks on the beach.”
“But not with LED lights in them,” Ash said. “No one knows what those things are made of.”
Someone said, “Lots of people know.”
Ash said, “But do they really?”
Ash turned to Mia. “Thank you. I presume you rigged the game for us?”
“I might have pulled some strings behind the scenes.” Mia winked. “But I couldn’t help you with the answers.”
Ash beamed at Rose. “We are obviously perfect for each other.”
