Many a Tear Has to Fall, page 21
Norm ordered and then took a deep draught of his beer. ‘She wanted me to give it up,’ he said gruffly. ‘I suppose I can understand her point of view a bit better now, but at the time I felt really mad with her because I’d told her the sea was my life. When I repeated that conversation to her, you should have seen her face. She looked like she was sucking a sherbet lemon, all sour.’
‘So did she give you an ultimatum?’
He nodded. ‘I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach when she said that she didn’t want to see me any more.’
‘I can imagine. It’s really painful getting tossed aside like an old piece of rag,’ Maggie said lightly.
He stared at her. ‘I really didn’t want to hurt you, Maggie. I was hoping that by now you would have forgiven me.’
‘Oh, I have! But at the time, would you believe me if I told you I was tempted to make a little stuffed mannequin and stick pins in it?’ she said cheerfully. ‘You do remember that we sell witch dolls up at the shop in Whalley?’
He looked uneasy. ‘You’re giving me the creeps, Maggie. When you said that you had to leave London on health grounds, what was wrong with you?’
‘If you’re thinking I had a nervous breakdown and went a bit nutty because you ditched me, you’re mistaken.’
‘The thought had occurred to me.’
‘You really do flatter yourself, Norm,’ she said, reaching for her wineglass again. ‘Have you forgotten I have a chest?’
He stared at her bosom. ‘You didn’t used to have much of a one.’
‘You’ve obviously forgotten I used to suffer from bronchitis a lot in winter. The doctor told me I needed to give up the ciggies, as well as get out of London, so I moved in with our Jared and Emma and their little boy in Formby at first. They now have a daughter as well. I’m hoping to get back up there for Christmas. It would be lovely being home for a family Christmas.’
‘What about the play?’
‘I’m sure the understudy will manage,’ she said casually.
‘You have an understudy?’
She nodded and changed the subject, asking him about the places he had visited since last they had been in touch. Eventually they rose from the table and left. He accompanied her to the nearest Tube station. ‘Perhaps I’ll get to see you in Liverpool sometime,’ he said.
‘Maybe. You really should keep in touch with your family.’
He frowned. ‘I work hard, you know? I have little free time.’
‘I wouldn’t argue. But, like me, you weren’t around when your mother wrote to Irene in California, telling her that her mother was very ill. She died before Irene had time to get home and see her,’ said Maggie bluntly.
‘That’s not going to happen to Ma. She’s as strong as an ox.’
‘Well, if you think like that, then you’d better start praying she carries on being as strong as an ox, because she not only has a day job still, she babysits for your brothers’ kids and also visits Irene’s stepfather, Alfred. You might have forgotten, but her mother and your mother were best friends, and she’s taken pity on the poor widower and his children.’
He scowled. ‘Thanks for letting me know. I’ll have to go. I have to get back to the Isle of Grain tonight.’
‘See you again sometime and have a safe voyage,’ said Maggie.
‘Thanks. I hope the play’s a smash hit here in London. See you.’ He bent his head and made to kiss her, but she averted her face. His scowl deepened and he turned away and strode off.
Maggie grinned. No doubt she wouldn’t be seeing him in Liverpool, although he just might get in touch with his family. She was surprised that he had even made the attempt to kiss her. Despite his apology, she thought that he still had a nerve thinking she would want his kisses.
Later that evening, Maggie told Dorothy about having met an old flame, whom she had known since she was at school, but who had dropped her after meeting someone else. But who in turn had been dropped and now seemed to want to make up with her.
The older woman put down the sheet music she was reading and looked at Maggie pensively. ‘You think there’s a story there. Is it that you want to get together again?’
‘No. I told him I’d had it with men after the way he treated me – and having met someone else I fell in love with, which didn’t work out either.’
‘Would you try again with the other bloke if you were to see him again and discovered that he wasn’t all bad?’
Maggie hesitated. ‘Did Lenny mention Tommy to you?’
‘Yes.’
‘I suppose he showed you the article about him having been involved in a robbery?’
‘Yes.’ Her eyes met Maggie. ‘Did you ever read it?’
She shook her head. ‘I didn’t want to because I knew it would upset me.’
Dorothy frowned. ‘I suppose it would be painful knowing he could play the part of a hero while at the same time being an old-fashioned cad.’
‘What d’you mean, a hero?’
Dorothy told her about Tommy saving the life of a child at the risk of his own.
Maggie was flabbergasted. Why had nobody told her?
‘Well?’ asked Dorothy eventually. ‘Do you feel any better about him now?’
‘I never did believe he was completely bad or without feelings. But he told me so many lies, and that I find hard to forgive.’ She reached for the sewing basket that had been her mother’s. Dorothy had caught a heel in the hem of a skirt and it needed repairing.
‘I remember fancying someone when I was just a few years younger than you,’ Dorothy said. ‘He was in love with a friend of mine, but she was killed in the Blitz. He was dead attractive. Later I met up with him again and we went out together and talked about getting married. But all the time I was keeping something back from him. I didn’t exactly lie to him, but I omitted to tell the truth. In other words, I lived a lie by deceiving him. Then he met someone else and, although I felt really mad with him for preferring her to me, I knew they’d be better for each other. She knew my secret, and eventually it came out. They married. Although I was a bit hurt, I was pleased for them, eventually. Anyway, I felt something for this other bloke, who some might have thought wasn’t a patch on the first one. He’d been a bit of a lad in his day and I hadn’t seen him for years. He’d been away in the army and I was to find that it was in his company I was able to relax, be myself and have fun. Love comes in different guises,’ she murmured.
She fell silent.
Maggie waited, wondering if the bloke she could relax with was Lenny. ‘So how is that supposed to help me?’ she asked casually.
Dorothy gave a twisted smile. ‘Now you’re asking! I’m sure I had something in mind when I started.’
‘You mean your mind drifted off and you lost the thread?’
‘Exactly.’ Dorothy yawned.
‘The thing is,’ said Maggie impulsively. ‘I don’t know if it was something I said that caused him to be arrested.’
‘I shouldn’t think so. There was a photograph of him in the Echo a day or two before he was arrested. Someone must have seen it, recognized him and informed the police.’ Dorothy stifled another yawn. ‘I’m tired. I’m off to bed. Goodnight.’
‘Sleep tight. Don’t let the bugs bite.’
‘Better not let our landlady hear you mention bugs.’
Maggie smiled faintly and carried on sewing, thinking she had enough in her life at the moment without worrying about their landlady and bugs. But she would now like to read both articles that had appeared in the Echo. She could not help wondering whether – if Dorothy knew about Tommy – Josh knew about him, too.
Twenty-Four
‘“What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear. What a privilege it is to carry everything to God in prayer”,’ warbled Gertie.
‘Why aren’t you singing a carol instead of a hymn?’ asked Pete, stretching to press a drawing pin through the loop on a garland of colourful paper chains and anchoring it to the picture rail. ‘It’s almost Christmas, after all.’ He was perched precariously on a stepladder.
‘I learnt that hymn when I went to Christian Endeavour meetings. It’s surprising what comes back to you years later, without you even having to think about it.’ His mother glanced up from packing presents into her holdall. ‘You be careful, lad. You should have left that until Peggy gets back from her mother’s.’
‘You’re at it again, fussing. I can manage this. I wanted to get it done while peace reigns.’
Gertie’s face softened. ‘I know she cries a bit, but she’s a lovely baby and some babies teethe earlier than others. I remember my cousin’s baby was born with a tooth. Anyway I’m going now, so you be careful.’
‘I don’t know why you insist on going by bus. I could have run you to West Derby in the car if you’d waited.’
‘I don’t want to wait.’ She made for the door, only to pause. ‘I’ve just remembered. There’s a letter behind the clock that came at lunchtime. It’ll tell you that Maggie is supposedly coming up for Christmas, so the theatre must be closed for a few days.’
‘Is she now?’ Pete murmured. ‘It’s nice of her to write and tell us.’
‘She hasn’t done anything of the sort. The letter’s from our Norm. They bumped into each other in London, went to the pictures and had a meal together. What d’you think of that?’ she said smugly.
‘What about his fiancée?’
‘He makes no mention of her. Maybe he changed his mind about her.’
‘You’re thinking he and Maggie might get together again?’
‘I’m not saying anything except tarrah and see yer later.’ And on those words, Gertie left.
Instantly Pete climbed down from the ladder and found his twin’s letter and read it before finishing his task. Not long after, he heard the front door key in the latch, and a few moments later the kitchen door opened and his wife appeared, carrying the baby who was knuckling her eyes.
‘Oh, it does look all nice and festive,’ Peggy said, glancing around before placing the baby on the sofa. ‘Where’s your mam?’
‘She’s gone to Alfred’s. I’m hoping you’ve brought something in for tea.’
Peggy smiled. ‘So we’ve the place to ourselves. I wish your mam would marry Alfred.’ She sat on the sofa and began to remove the baby’s bonnet.
‘So do I, but I can’t see it happening. She might like helping him out with the kids, but living with them, I’m not so sure. By the way, there’s a letter from our Norm. He saw Maggie in London and she’s supposedly coming north for Christmas.’
‘No mention of a fiancée?’
‘No.’
‘D’you think he and Maggie will get together again? You know your twin better than anyone.’
‘I wish people would stop saying that. I no longer know which way the wind blows with him, now our lives have gone separate ways. Anyway, if you were Maggie, would you have him back?’
‘No, but she was devastated, wasn’t she, when she learnt the truth about our Tommy? She could be desperate for a bit of loving.’
Pete frowned. ‘She might have found someone in the repertory theatre. Anyway, how do we even know if she’s aware that your Tommy’s in prison?’
‘We don’t.’ Peggy lifted the baby from her fleecy all-in-one. ‘I’m not going to say anything about him if I see her.’
‘Her sister might tell her as she sees a fair bit of Irene.’
‘I wonder how he’s surviving.’ Peggy sighed and finished seeing to the baby’s needs, before fetching the shopping bag that she had left in the pushchair.
Pete said, ‘So, what’s there to eat? I bet it’ll be better than whatever Tommy’s having in prison.’
‘A bacon shank from the cooked-meat shop on Bridge Road. If you can peel and slice some potatoes, I’ll make some potato scallops to go with it and open a tin of peas.’
‘Sounds good to me.’ He grinned. ‘Ma’s complimentary about your cooking – that’s why she’s landed you with cooking Christmas dinner. I thought she might be going to Dougie’s or Alfred’s, but she said she wants to be home for the baby’s first Christmas.’ He kissed Peggy on the cheek on his way into the back kitchen.
Peggy sighed, thinking it would have been nice to have just her and Pete and the baby for Christmas, but she was not going to complain. Her mother-in-law had her good points. But hopefully Pete was wrong and his mother would marry Alfred. It would be a step up for her, moving into his semi-detached, and it would mean Peggy and Pete would have the house completely to themselves. Still, having to put up with his mother was better than being in prison like Tommy.
Peggy found over the next day or so that she could not get her brother out of her mind. She mentioned it when Gertie and Pete came home from work the following day. ‘I can’t believe it’s almost Christmas. I keep thinking of our Tommy spending it behind bars.’
Gertie sat at the table. ‘You haven’t thought of visiting him?’
Peggy hesitated and shot a glance at Pete. ‘What do you think?’
‘I’d speak to your Marty about it.’
‘If you remember when he enquired about seeing Tommy after he was arrested, he didn’t want to see any of us.’
Gertie said, ‘Embarrassed, that’s why. He’s full of shame for letting his family down.’
‘Shame! Our Lil would say Tommy hasn’t an ounce of shame,’ said Peggy, placing the casserole dish in the middle of the table.
‘And what do you say?’ asked Gertie.
Peggy paused in the act of removing the casserole lid. ‘I just wish he’d stayed in London.’
Gertie tapped the table with her knife. ‘Someone should go and see him, for your mother’s sake. She’ll be thinking about him. He might have wandered from the right path, but he was trying to go straight, wasn’t he? Hadn’t he started his own business?’ She glanced at Pete who nodded. ‘Now is the time he could do with a helping hand to drag him back on to the straight and narrow,’ said Gertie. ‘Remember the woman caught in adultery in the Bible, and what Jesus said about he who is without sin casting the first stone?’
‘I think you’ve caught religion from Alfred, Ma,’ Pete said.
‘And what’s wrong with being religious?’ Gertie said sharply. ‘You might think that I didn’t know what you were up to when you had your accident years ago, but I did and kept my mouth shut. I thought at the time you were already paying the price for your foolishness, and it broke my heart to see you suffering. We all make mistakes and deserve a second chance. I think someone in the family should try and see Tommy. From what I’ve gathered, Peggy, your father was hard on the lad.’ She sniffed. ‘Anyway, I’ve said my piece and I’ll shut up now and let you dish out the dinner. I’m hungry.’
‘You should have thought of that before you started this conversation,’ Peggy said tartly.
‘Enough said, Peg,’ muttered Pete.
Despite her annoyance with Gertie, Peggy did not forget what her mother-in-law had said about Tommy. The next morning she left the baby, Katherine Mary Gertrude, with Pete, and caught the bus to Litherland, intending going to Mass at the church where Irene and Marty worshipped.
Both showed surprise when they saw her sitting in a pew. ‘What’s wrong with your own church?’ joked Marty.
‘I wanted a word with you,’ Peggy said.
‘Well, let it wait until after the service,’ he responded.
She nodded, and during the service tried her best not to be distracted by Josie and Jerry whispering together. As soon as the service was over, she hurried outside, not wanting to be drawn into conversation with those she knew who attended the church.
‘You should have waited inside,’ said Marty, approaching her. ‘You look freezing. Let’s go to our house and have a cup of tea,’ he suggested.
‘No, I have to get back home and I don’t want Jerry to hear what I have to say. I won’t keep you long.’
‘Is it about Tommy?’
She nodded. ‘Pete’s mother thinks one of us should visit him in prison, seeing as how it’s almost Christmas. Families coming together, and all that.’
‘You’re worked up about this, aren’t you?’ said Marty, putting an arm about her shoulders and hugging her. ‘And you’re cold. Change your mind and come back to ours and I’ll run you home in the van afterwards.’
‘No, Irene will be wanting to get your dinner on the table. Just tell me what you think? Do we carry on being completely fed up with him for being a selfish sod, upsetting Mam, dumping his child on you and embarrassing the life out of us all, or what? After all, he saved that little boy’s life and bought Mam chocolates and the kids sweets, so we know there’s some good in him?’
‘I’m prepared to forgive him, and Mam has probably already forgiven him, even if our Lily will never do so,’ said Marty. ‘And if you remember, I did try to see him but he didn’t want to see me. He even refused to see Father Francis.’
‘I know but—’
‘I’ll tell you what I’ll do … I’ll write to him.’
Peggy sagged against Marty. ‘Thanks. What’ll you say?’
‘I’ll tell him that we’re thinking of him and that Jerry is getting on all right at school. That I’d like to visit him as I think there’s matters we need to discuss.’
‘Such as that garage of his,’ said Peggy. ‘What’s happening to it? Are all his tools still there?’
Marty frowned. ‘I don’t know, but I suppose I should find out. Anything else?’
‘What about putting a photo of Jerry in the envelope, with a Christmas card from Jerry. He mightn’t be able to write much, but you could help him with his name and he can put some kisses on it.’
‘You think that’s a good idea? He doesn’t know Tommy’s in prison.’
‘But he knows he’s somewhere trying to make his fortune, and surely would be made up to be in touch with him. Besides, it might make Tommy think more about what you’ve taken on – being a father to his son again.’ She clutched his arm. ‘You could also suggest that he sends Jerry a Christmas message.’ She hesitated. ‘I suppose you’ll have to tell Irene what you’re doing?’
