Men of Honor Eric, page 8
“Tyler, why, why didn’t you come to me with any of this? Why did you take this on by yourself? She’s still your mother, are you sure you won’t regret this somewhere down the road?” I couldn’t read the look he gave me, but when he smiled like the little boy I raised, I felt the constriction around my heart ease. “She shouldn’t have gone after the people I love.”
I nodded my head and realized that until today, I would’ve had no doubt that he was talking about me. Now, I’m not so sure.
TYLER
Dammit, I didn’t want him to know about this. I should’ve been more careful. I had to leave my room because it was too close to her, and lately, that’s been a problem. Stop, Tyler, just fucking stop. I buried my head in my hand as Paul and Janine carried on their conversation.
I feel like a creep. Like a fucking neckbeard who creeps on unsuspecting females in the dark, but lately, I can’t seem to help myself. I would never touch her, I know better than to cross that line, but twice now, I found myself opening her door to watch her sleep. Just for a few seconds, but each time I walked away feeling like scum.
I have no idea how this happened, how she went from the girl my dad brought home with his new wife to this being that consumes my every thought. I thought I had it in control; in fact, I know I did until I realized she was in danger from my own mother.
I don’t think dad grasps just how toxic Janine really is, or the lengths she’s willing to go to to get what she wants. I used to wish to have her in my life, even years after she left us, and for a little while after the incident with the car in the rain. But she’s burnt too many bridges since then, done too much damage for me to look back. And the fact that she was willing to go after an innocent young girl who’d done her no wrong was just the last fucking straw.
Eric
I went back to bed, feeling like a complete failure. I held it together in front of my son, but he could have no idea what all of this was doing to me. I felt like the last ten years I’d only been fooling myself, like everything I’d tried to shield him from had already been heaped onto his precious little head without me knowing, and I’ve never been closer to taking out someone in my life.
I’ve never wanted to strangle Janine as much as I do right now. Why was she doing this shit? Why go to these lengths? Could it be that even though I’d set her straight all those years ago, she really still believed that I was hung up on her? None of this is making any damn sense. Or is she really nuts like Tyler’s been saying?
I used to think he was just saying that shit to say it the way kids exaggerate everything these days, but maybe there’s some truth to it since this is all nuts. How the fuck did I drop the ball like this? And now I’ve brought Justine and Lora into the mix, more targets for her sick ass when I didn’t even protect the one I should’ve been protecting from her all along.
I couldn’t even lie down next to my wife; I didn’t feel like I had the right, or like I was worthy of that honor after being such a monumental fuck up. She and our daughter’s lives were in danger, and I didn’t have a clue; my son had to be the one to see the truth about his mom and make moves to protect this family, something he should never have been responsible for at his age.
My mind went to Grey and what he’d said, but I was sure that this wasn’t even on his radar. I’m almost certain that he’d been referencing her bringing Sam and his wife here to start trouble because if he knew about this other thing, he would’ve told me right off the bat.
I paced the sitting room off the master suite for the better part of an hour as I tried to come up with some kind of plan to deal with Janine once and for all. Tyler was right, her husband would move heaven and earth to make sure she never saw the inside of a courtroom, and though I could use my money to overpower him, I wasn’t in the mood to deal with that shit anyway, seeing as how ninety-nine percent of the time the victim gets screwed. So Ty had a point there; this has to be handled in-house.
JUSTINE
Something’s up with those two, I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there’s something in the air hovering between the two of them. Something they’re both trying very hard to keep hidden. I was still reeling from what I’d overheard the night before and figured there had been more said between them and left it at that.
By the time everyone left for the day, and I headed to my craft room where I spend most of my days, I was thinking of ways to deal with the messiness that was my life. As far as I can tell, Janine had been pretty much out of the picture before I came along. For whatever reason, once she got wind that Eric and I were seeing each other, she went completely psycho.
I thought for sure that after the wedding and me moving in here, things would’ve calmed down, but after yesterday, I’m not so sure. I’m kind of guessing from snippets of the conversation I overheard last night before Tyler dropped his bombshell that Janine is the one responsible for bringing Sam and Kristen here.
Eric has told me from day one that I have no need to worry about her, and until last night I may have kept myself as far away from her as possible, but knowing what she’d done to her own little boy had shifted something inside me. No matter how horrible life had become, I would never have subjected Lora to something like that.
As a mother, her despicable act has touched off something in me that had long lain dormant. Tyler is, in essence, my son now, isn’t he? Though we aren’t overly close, mainly because I came into his life when he was too old to need a replacement for his mother, and I have no experience with teenage boys, he’s still my responsibility as his dad’s wife.
And though what he described had happened years ago, I know for a fact that she’s still bothering Tyler since I married his dad. I played the doormat with Kristen and Sam for so long that it has become second nature, but when I look at my little girl and imagine what she sees when she looks at me, it breaks my heart.
I’d told myself I was doing it for her. That I was suffering the humiliation and degradation for her sake, holding onto that last little bit of hope that Sam would come to his senses one day, and even though he and I were through, he might still want to have a place in his child’s life. I was wrong.
The boy I knew and loved when I was little more than a child myself was no more. I no longer recognize the man he’s become. I guess I can be grateful that he and his wife didn’t want anything to do with my daughter, something Kristen thought would hurt me, but I’m now thankful for. I can only imagine how she would’ve abused my poor little girl, who was the only innocent in this, just like Tyler.
For some reason, I can’t get the image of the soaked little boy running to his mama’s car and the callous way in which she’d driven off out of my head. My phone rang just as I fitted the mat into my Cricut machine, and I answered without first checking to see who was calling.
“Justine, it’s me, don’t hang up, please.”
“Sam? What do you want?” His voice sounded strange, nothing at all like it had the day before or the last few times when he called with threats.
“Listen, I’m sorry we came there to cause trouble, I never wanted to do that. But look, I think you need to be careful.”
“Are you threatening me? We’ve been all through this…”
“No-no, you’ve got it all wrong. It’s not me; it’s that Janine woman. I overheard her talking to Kristen. I think she’s planning something; I think she wants to hurt you bad.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I don’t know all the details. I just heard the tail end of the conversation. Look, just be careful, okay, and take care of Lora, and look…I’m sorry. I’m really sorry about all this.” He hung up the phone, leaving me stymied and wondering if I should take anything he said seriously.
But as much as he’s changed over the years, I know that voice, I know when he’s lying and when he’s trying to get one over on me. This didn’t sound like either of those things. I left the craft room and made my way up to the master suite. Even though the household staff was in the house, I hadn’t seen anyone. That’s Eric’s doing; he always tells them not to bother me when I’m in there. But the way I feel now, some human contact would be good.
I dropped down on the side of our bed, feeling listless. Sam had sounded terrified. What exactly had he heard? I knew Janine hated me, but to hurt me? Just the mention of Kristen’s name gave me shivers. She’s been after me for years, even though she was the one who’d taken my husband and stolen my life.
She’s hated my guts since day one because I think she resented the fact that I was Sam’s first love and that we shared a child, a child that she hated almost as much as she hated me. In fact, the only interest she ever showed in Lora was when Eric and I were getting married.
Once she realized that I would be in a better position than her, she’d flipped and gone on a tear, trying to get Sam to fight me for custody, because she knew that I would’ve done anything to hold onto Lora. But she’d never come after me physically, maybe because the young teenage Lora had threatened her once that if she ever came near me, she’d knock her into next week.
Even my own daughter had more grit than I did. I’m such a loser. I felt myself wanting to go back to the old fallback plan. Just bury my head in the sand until it all passed. I could feel myself drift close to the comfort and numbness I used to feel when I did that in the past, feel it calling to me.
As my head hit the pillow and I reached for the covers to pull them up over my face, my eyes fell on the larger than life portrait that Eric insisted on keeping over the fireplace in our master bedroom. It’s one of him and me on our wedding day with the kids, Lora at his side and Tyler at mine.
We all look so happy there. I remember that day and all the promises he’d made to me then, and it was as if a light went off in my head. I’m no longer the beaten, downtrodden ex-wife of a mechanic. My husband is worth millions; in fact, last I heard, he’s worth more than Janine’s these days.
To an ordinary person, something like that wouldn’t matter, but to her, it would. I can use that. I have to do something, but what? I can’t just sit back while she comes after my children and me, and they are both mine now. Good, I can go upside her head for what she did to Tyler all those years ago, just let her give me the excuse I need.
I jumped out of bed, mad at myself for almost giving in to that weakness. But I was still looking around the room at a loss as to what to do next. Where would it hurt her most? A shower, I do some of my best thinking when I’m in there the way some people do their best singing.
It took five minutes of me standing under the spray of warm water to come up with an idea. By the time I flicked the water off, I was smiling like a hyena. I had to do some research first, though, so as much as it pained me, I went online and looked up Janine’s social media posts. Why people love to tell the world their every move is beyond me, but hey, to each his own.
Next, I made a phone call and got the response I was expecting. “Please tell me we’re gonna beat her ass in an alley. We don’t have to kill her or anything, but a good work over is just what old girl needs to set her dumb ass straight.”
“Janelle!”
“Okay-okay, come pick me up. I’m not even going to make you pay me by letting me drive that car of yours. This, I will do for free. Wait, does Eric…”
“No, he doesn’t know, and you can’t say anything to him either.”
“Oh shit, I’m putting this out there right now. If shit goes left, you take the fall. Your husband has bitch teeth in his mouth when it comes to tattling to my husband and that one’s on some other shit about nursing mothers shouldn’t do this, and nursing mothers shouldn’t do that.”
“Oh…shoot, I forgot about the baby, maybe you shouldn’t…”
“Girl, kill that noise. This Vaseline, in my bag, has been waiting for the day. Oooh-wheee.” She hung up the phone and left me wondering if I’d made a mistake calling her.
Justine
I got over my angst about Janelle. It was no surprise that she wanted in on whatever I had planned for Janine even without being told what I had in mind. I’d learned when filling in for her at Eric's office that she had a strong dislike for my husband’s ex and made no bones about it.
The fact that she genuinely seemed to like me is what gave me the push to make the call, and reservations aside, I’m glad I did. In the almost year I’ve known her, she’s become someone I consider a friend, something I haven’t had since high school since most of our mutual friends had sided with Sam and Kristen in the divorce.
And if I’m honest, it was her no-nonsense tell it like it is attitude that had helped squelch some of my earlier reservations about Eric. I guess I figured back then that if someone as straightforward and bluntly honest as she could love and trust him, then there must be something there to like. Not to mention the stories she told of how he’d been there for her since her early teens.
She was also the one who’d filled me in on a lot of Janine’s past shenanigans before the other woman turned her attention on me. All in all, I can’t fault my decision to get her involved. Not that I was going to let her do much of anything; she was going as purely ballast. It’s time I stand up for myself, way past time in fact, and today felt like the day.
I paid especially close attention to my clothing and even did a little bit more with my makeup. It was shallow and stupid, but these are the things Janine puts much stock in. Not that I don’t make myself presentable for my husband, it’s just that I think who a person is on the inside carries more weight than any color scheme they can find in a makeup palette.
The winter white pantsuit that I remember Eric buying for me because he said it would look good with my coloring really did highlight the soft tan undertones of my skin, and my dark hair shone around my shoulders, standing out even more against the brightness of my jacket.
I wore the simple diamond studs Eric had bought me just because and smiled at the fact that he’d bought some for Lora as well, even though her two-carat stones were two carats less than mine. It still warms my heart the way he looks after my girl, picking up where her dad had left off so long ago. Is it any wonder I’m crazy about him?
Thinking about how good he is with the children also brought to mind our morning lovemaking session. Although I could tell that there was something bothering him when I woke up this morning to find him staring at me in bed without uttering a single word, when he pulled me into and then under him, the flash of worry I’d felt had dissipated right away.
The way he’d touched me, all soft and gentle, had made my heart race as much as it does when he puts on the caveman act, and in fact, I’d be hard-pressed to choose which I prefer. Him pounding into me as he tells me he wants me to have his child or the gentle, tender way he’d looked into my eyes this morning as he came inside me, just before lowering his lips to my ear to tell me just how much he wants to share his seed with me.
I had to shake myself out of it, or I’d have soaked my panty shield for sure. After months of marriage and with two teenagers in the house, I’m amazed that he can still do this to me. After years of keeping myself off the market, I think I’d been convinced that these days were long past. The truth is, I feel better now in this relationship with my sexy domineering husband than I had as an inexperienced teen with my first.
I spritzed on some of my new favorite scent and grabbed my designer clutch on my way out of the room. I wasn’t worried about being too overdressed for Janelle because she never leaves the house looking anything less than a ten, and I also knew if I didn’t bring my A-game, as she calls it that she’d probably drag me back here to change.
I eyed Eric’s custom Hummer and really gave some serious thought to driving that instead of my nifty little Maserati, but in the end, I figured I better not risk it. Janelle was already way too focused on getting her hands on Janine literally when all I was interested in was putting her in her place for now if I drove that who knows what she’d try talking me into.
ERIC
Wait, that sounds like Justine out there; what’s she doing here? Not that I mind. Anytime my wife drops in on me, I’m good, but why wasn’t she coming in? I got even more confused when she just put her head around the door and didn’t come into the office like she usually does. I hadn’t thought about it until I saw her pretty face, but a little distraction is just what I need right now to help me escape my thoughts.
“Hi, hubby!”
“Hey, babe, what’re you doing? Get in here.” I pushed my chair back from the desk and started to get up to go to her, but she stopped me in my tracks.
“Can’t Janelle and I have an appointment.”
“Janelle?”
Just then, she called out from her desk, “Hey boss, I’m taking a long lunch man the phones.”
“Isn’t that what I pay you for?” I got up and went to stand in the doorway.
“Not today, you ain’t. Come on, Justine, he has that look in his eye again. Nasty. If lunch goes over, I just might go home right after. We don’t have anything doing anyway.”
It wasn’t even eleven just where the heck was these two off to that she thought it was going to take the better part of a day? Before I could open my mouth to ask, Janelle was dragging my poor wife to the elevator, and Justine was grinning back at me with a wave.
Damn, I didn’t even get to feel her in that suit. I knew she would look good as hell in it, though, and I was right. But wasn’t that shit showing her ass off a bit too much? I grumbled my displeasure all the way back to my desk while I tried to figure out what the heck was going on and why the people in my life were hell-bent on making me crazy.
I’d tried getting Tyler to tell me what had happened last night after I left him alone, but all he’d tell me was that everything was going to plan and not to worry. No matter how I tried to tell him that maybe I should be the one dealing with this mess, he wouldn’t hear of it. Claiming in the end that since Janine was his mother and since he was the reason I’d kept her around, that it was his duty. I regret telling him that shit.
