Trust Me II, page 22
“Eryn is the flight attendant and you have nothing to worry about. I’m not interested in her.”
“I don’t want her there. Why do we need her anyway?”
“Because she keeps things running for us, makes sure we have meals and drinks available and she’s there in case of emergencies. She’s a trained flight attendant; it’s her job.”
“I don’t want her there,” she said again, though slightly under her breath. Creighton sighed, wrapping his arms around her a bit tighter.
“I have a confession to make,” he said, his mouth against her ear. “I saw you go into the bathroom that night and I waited for you to come out. I used Eryn to make you jealous. I sort of encouraged her affection because I knew you would see it.” Sandra narrowed her eyes and turned to look at him again.
“Why would you do that?” she asked in a threatening tone.
“Because I wanted to play with you; I thought it would be fun to have you jealous. I like how it feels when your green eyes come into the picture. I just wasn’t counting on it backfiring and was not considering the consequences. I’m sorry and I promise I won’t do it again. If you don’t want her there, I’ll tell Davies to leave her in England, but it wasn’t her fault.”
“Did she know you were using her?”
“She picked up on it when I laughed at your reaction and you slammed the bedroom door. I can guarantee she won’t allow me to use her again.”
“Neither will I,” she warned. “If you even think of doing anything like that again…”
“I won’t. I don’t like sleeping alone on the sofa while you’re crying in the next room. That’s why I started drinking; I couldn’t bear the thought of what I had done causing you such grief.”
“Do you always like pushing your limits?” she asked with a soft growl, turning back into his arms and propping her feet up on the end of the tub’s rim.
Creighton was silent for several minutes, his hands caressing her torso. He let out a heavy sigh and leaned his head back against the wall behind the tub. Now was as good a time as any to come clean with her, he thought.
“Why do I have a feeling you’re hiding something from me?” She turned her head up to look over her shoulder at him and frowned. He held a haunted look in his eyes, his jaw clenched and there was a brief moment of tense regret pulling at his mouth.
“When I told you I don’t like hurting women, it wasn’t exactly the truth,” he said with a frown. “Many years ago, while I was still in school, I made a mistake that nearly cost my sanity.” He closed his eyes as the memories began to wash over him.
“You asked me once why I liked to play the way I do. It started with Miriam’s visit to me, but the truth is, I explored the depths of her teachings much further than she could have taught me. I eventually found a level I was comfortable with, but it wasn’t an easy journey.
“There are many underground clubs in London where people like me go to explore their sexual fantasies. I found one that I particularly liked. It had several rooms upstairs that were soundproof and equipped for exploration, sort of a miniature version of Miriam’s place. I had begun to explore the female body, learned how to make women come, how to make them have deeper orgasms then even they knew was possible. I went on a lot of dates that all ended the same way; in bed with her screaming her release. I was very popular in school, all the girls were talking about how great of a lover I was, yet I felt I never truly understood the restraints I had on my own control.
“One weekend I went to the club and found a very beautiful Iranian woman, a few years old than I was, who loved to have hard sex. The harder the better, the stranger the better; she loved to be beaten and wanted to know how far she could push a man until he lost control. She was darker than even Miriam could have handled. She paid men to rape and beat her; not an unusual request in that type of establishment. It seemed like the perfect match; I wanted to lose control and she wanted to push me past my breaking point.” He drew a deep breath and raised his head, staring down at her shoulder as he relived the past.
“We met on several occasions and each time she would push me further, making my control slip each time. It was fascinating; erotic, dark. I couldn’t resist it, she was like an aphrodisiac. I went crawling back to that club night after night to the point I nearly failed two of my classes because I was so consumed with sex and orgasms.
“I couldn’t concentrate, I could barely sleep. One night she told me we weren’t going to stop; she wanted to see me out of control and she wanted to fall to my mercy. We met the next day around noon, it was a Sunday and the club was open only to specific clientele. By then I was making some pretty decent money and could afford the place. We chose a room that had a multitude of machines; I mean real machines, like those you’d find in a torture chamber. There were chains on the walls, a table where your partner was tethered by the hands and feet, spread eagle as a drill type vibrator penetrated the body.
“It was darker than anything I had ever done up to that point. She liked the table, but she liked the restraints on the wall better. There were straps that wrapped around the neck and stomach and held the person so tight they could move nothing more than their fingers or toes. We used the table and a chair that had no seat, just a vibrator below it that moved in and out of the body on a remote control. I was afraid of the wall; it looked far beyond anything I could stomach, but she kept begging me until I broke and chained her to it.
“She wanted me to whip her with a flogger, much larger and much meaner than the one you have. I used it for a few minutes, but it wasn’t hard enough to satisfy her. She begged me to hit her, with my hands and to not stop. She knew what buttons to push; she called me names, criticized my family, anything she could do to make me angry and it worked. One sting after another and I quickly lost all control.
“I was transported into a very dark, very evil place that I wasn’t sure if I could ever come out of. I hit her over and over, ignoring her when she begged me to stop; she told me to not stop and I listened, it was about the only thing I remembered at the time. I felt like I was a different person; like a schizophrenic and I was watching all that was happening from somewhere outside my own body. When I finally realized what I was doing and stopped, she was unconscious.”
Creighton drew another deep breath and closed his eyes, swallowing hard as he tried to fight off the visions that were surrounding him. When he opened his eyes again, there were tears brimming the dark blue depths and he looked out the window above the sinks, staring at the empty sky.
“The club had a strict gag-policy; whatever happened there stayed there. The bouncers took her back to her flat and called the paramedics. She spent two weeks in hospital. When she recovered I was told she went back to her home in Iran. The last time I went to the club to see if they had heard anything more from her, I was told she had been killed in the crossfire of an enemy attack.”
Creighton sighed, closing his eyes as the tears slid down his cheeks. When he opened them again, the regret and remorse shone in the dark depths like clouded ghosts. Sandra could see how deeply this had affected him and the depth of the scars it had left on him. When he looked at her it was with a sadness that made her heart ache and she had no choice but to reach up and touch his cheek.
“I have never forgiven myself for that and I have never allowed myself to be taunted into losing control again. I realized how stupid I acted that night on the plane and how close I had come to pushing you past your limits. I won’t do it again. I will not make you feel like you are beyond control of your emotions, not like that. That’s why when I tell you, you are in control of when and how much you can handle, I mean it. If you say no, then it’s no; if you say stop, I’ll stop. No questions asked. I will go beyond my own safety to protect you no matter the cost.”
“I trust you Creighton and I know you will never hurt me,” she whispered. “What happened was a long time ago and it’s over, you can’t blame yourself for her death.”
“It’s because of me she left the safety of England,” he said, the sorrow gripping his words. “I didn’t stop even when she begged me to.”
“But you’re not like that,” Sandra insisted. “When I’ve asked you to stop, you have, immediately. I don’t fear you and I never will.” Creighton suddenly lifted her into his arms, turning her to face him and sitting her astride his legs.
“I will never give you reason to mistrust me,” he promised. “You are my soul; because of you I can move forward past my nightmares. With you I have a future and hope for a normal life. I’ve allowed my money and my looks to get me whatever I wanted and because of that I cost a woman her life. There is no forgiveness for something like that.”
“Now you listen to me,” she said sternly. “You are a good man, you do good things and people love you. She was the one who told you to beat her; you didn’t want to do it. Maybe the reason she left was because she knew she had done something unspeakably evil to another person, that she had caused what happened to her and created the situation that put you in the position of uncontrollable limits. You can’t continue to blame yourself for what happened; there were two of you there and she was just as responsible for what happened as you were.” Creighton sighed again, pulling her against his chest and kissing her lips.
“You are my savior,” he whispered. “You are my reason and my conscious and I will never let you forget how desperately I need you, or how deeply I love you.” His lips fell across hers again; his kiss becoming more passionate as she raised her hips and allowed him to slide into her body. It was like a soul searing, soul healing act and he took advantage of her gift, thrusting into her until his soul was cleansed. In her arms he was safe, in her heart he was loved; in her eyes he was perfect. He would never do anything to alter that opinion or to let her regret her decision to join her life with his.
CHAPTER TEN
“Davies will have the plane here by ten,” he told her later that day as they lay embraced on the sofa, a book of wallpaper and window treatment open on her lap. The afternoon had been spent discussing their designs for the house. Creighton told her about Andrew’s email and that they could move in when they returned to Yorkshire. They had emailed Maxine, the designer who was working on the house and assured her they would decide on what colors, schemes and furniture they wanted for the rooms and let her know by the time they reached Kansas.
Sandra had spent nearly forty-five minutes on the phone with her grandparents, informing them they would be coming back to discuss business and go through her belongings. They would spend several days, even a week or two depending on quickly Creighton could arrange the beginning of what he jokingly called project Kansas Kandy.
The details of the plans had been submitted to the town’s planning committee and the mayor was already planning a press release to inform everyone that New Hope Technologies, with the aide of Hoisington’s former head librarian, would be arriving to settle the final details for the plant that would prove beneficial to the town. In another breath, he was also planning on suggesting that he was running for a third term as mayor. It would prove to be equally beneficial for all parties involved.
So far, they had chosen the colors for the bedrooms, each with their own unique design; the romantic Victorian theme for the master suite and told Maxine to leave the bedroom closest to the master alone, they would decide on what to do with it when the time came. The truth was, the decided it would make a perfect nursery, but they weren’t ready to make the decision of how to decorate it just yet.
The living room already had the furniture they bought the last time they were in Paris and the kitchen had been stocked with all eco-friendly appliances. Creighton’s uncle Fenton had given them the dining set from Emma’s mother and it was ready to be placed in the room once the painting and fireplace was repaired and finished. It looked like they would indeed have a home to move into once they were ready for it.
“Is Eryn going to be there?” Sandra asked, flipping through the pages of baby designs, pretending to not be interested.
“No. I explained to Davies that we didn’t want to be overseen and there was no need for her to join us this time. It will give her a chance to be with her boyfriend anyway. They’ve been having problems and could use the time to work on their relationship.”
“I’m not surprised they are having problems; she was too eager that night you were flirting with her, even if you were using her. She’s probably getting bored, or she’s been straying.”
“What makes you think she’s the one straying?” he looked at her with an amused smile. “Quite often it’s the man who looks at other women.”
“Not the way she was looking at you. You would have thought you were on the discount rack and she was eager to snatch you up.” Creighton laughed softly, but chose it was probably best to drop the subject.
“I read on the internet that Miriam has returned to America to finish her book tour,” Sandra said a few minutes later.
“Andrew said they questioned her and she even agreed to a lie detector. She came clean and they took her off their suspect list.”
“I’ve been thinking about her father,” she said quietly. “I don’t think he did the murders, at least not all of them. I can see where he had the opportunity and possibly even a motive for Lynette Stone.”
“He had every opportunity to do the crimes. He was ex-military in the German Army, which meant he had the skills and knowledge of how to kill. Look what he did to me; what’s to say he didn’t do the same to innocent, weaker women. Sometimes people have a dark side, and I’m talking about a much darker side than the one I have.”
“I think your emotions are too involved to think straight on this,” she said softly, pushing past the thought of him having an alter ego. “I think you want him to be guilty so you can find some sense of justice for the pain he inflicted on you.”
“You think I’m out for revenge?” he asked with a frown, watching her shrug her shoulders.
“It wouldn’t be the first time a victim wanted to see their attacker found guilty of a heinous act.” Before Creighton had the chance to answer, his phone began to buzz, putting an end to the subject; at least temporarily.
Creighton pressed the button on his phone and listened to the message, an excited smile curving the corners of his lips. He sat up on his elbow and listened intently, then hung up the phone and tossed it to the coffee table.
“Bachmeier has been caught,” he said cheerfully watching the shocked expression cross his wife’s beautiful face.
“How?”
“Clark has been watching Miriam’s clinic through the security system and saw an intruder last night. The person wore dark clothing and had come in through a basement window, stumbling around as though he was unfamiliar with the place. With Miriam and Juliet out of the country there was no need for anyone to be there. Clark called the security team and the police got there a couple of hours later. They found him asleep in the medieval room.”
“But Miriam wasn’t there?”
“No, but she was informed of the events and who was found in her clinic. She pressed charges against him, with that, as well as leaving the country while on probation, breaking and entering at my parents’ place, carrying a weapon and the assault on the waiter, he’ll be going back to jail for a long time to come.” Creighton collapsed on the sofa beside her again, sighing contently.
“Well, your parents will be happy,” she said. “At least now your mom won’t have to worry about setting the alarm or triggering it accidentally.” Creighton sighed, relief shinning on his face.
“I think everyone will be able to sleep better now, including the neighbors. Mum said it was the first time they started locking their doors. Most of them didn’t have keys and locked themselves out of their own homes.”
“I’m glad it’s over. Now things can settle down and we’ll be able to find a pace to call normal.”
“We should definitely find some sense of normality from here on out; a typical British family is what we’re going to be.” Sandra sighed into him as he wrapped her closer to his chest. This was as typical as she wanted to be; in his arms, making love on a whim and relishing each other’s body. Yep, this was to be the Ashford’s new normal.
Sandra’s ears popped as the elevation increased and the jetliner ripped through the morning skies. Creighton was once again busy on his computer, finishing a number of projects and reviewing the details of the final designs of their farm.
The garage was underway, the barn had been built during the time it took for the forensic team to finish up their investigation and the house was finished, save the décor and furnishings. The wedding presents had been delivered to the house and the news of Bachmeier’s arrest had filled the front pages of the local newspapers. Things were finally looking up for the young couple.
Sandra was feeling much better and had not had another experience of nausea or dizziness since yesterday morning. It was a relief though she was concerned; Creighton said the nausea was a good sign, what did it mean when it stopped?
“You look about five thousand miles away,” he said sitting down next to her on the large sofa. Sandra closed the pregnancy book she had been reading and set it aside, smiling up at him. For the first time in her life, she was getting tired of reading.
“I was just thinking about the future and what it held in store for us. I’ve never been consumed by so many subjects all at once before; marriage, pregnancy, wife of a perverted stalker. I just keep wondering what else will happen before I can hang my coat in the closet for good.”
“The lunatic has been caught, the project in Kansas is about to be completed and we’ll be back in England in a few weeks, securely tucked away and preparing for our next step. Once we get home you can start your writing career and I’ll return to my husband lessons. Life will find a new path for us and we’ll walk down it together.”
“So long as I can have a rocking chair on the front porch to watch the sunset, I’ll live happily ever after.” Creighton smiled, kissing her temple.
