Going For It, page 20
“What?”
Jamie leaned forward, straining to hear, even though she knew it was none of her business. Marcy’s voice sounded so…odd.
“I wanted you to know that when I asked you out to dinner, it wasn’t as a friend.”
“No?”
“Uh-uh.”
“What did you ask me out for?”
“Damn. I’m sorry, I’m probably going to embarrass the hell out of you. I never dreamed I’d say anything like this, but my friend, she’s going through a lot right now because she doesn’t know the real story, and I don’t want to miss out on something that could be totally terrific because I was a chicken, so I’m just going to say it, and you don’t have to worry, if it’s no, I’ll under—”
Marcy’s voice stopped mid-word. But, if Jamie wasn’t mistaken, there were still signs of life coming from the other room. Kissing sounds. Scratch that. Major kissing sounds.
After an embarrassingly long time, she heard a deep intake of breath and a nervous cough.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Marcy asked.
“I wasn’t sure how you felt.”
“Me? Are you kidding?”
He shook his head. “I haven’t done this in a while. I wasn’t sure I was reading the signals correctly. I’ve been trying to get up my nerve to talk to you.”
“Oh.”
He laughed softly. “Thank you.”
“Me? For what?”
“For being so brave. Imagine all the time and misery we’ve saved because you were willing to put yourself out there. No wonder I’m crazy about you.”
“Really?”
Marcy’s voice was high-pitched, breathy, and so full of happiness that Jamie wanted to cry. For her friend. Okay, so some of it was jealousy, but the lion’s share wasn’t. She just kinda wished she couldn’t hear all the smooching. She loved Marcy, but not that much.
There was no way to sneak out. She’d have to wait until they finished. She might as well use the time to think. About Ted and Marcy. About bravery. About missed connections.
“IS IT TRUE?”
Jamie inhaled, closed her eyes and prayed for the right words. “It was true, Lorraine. It’s not true any longer.”
“You mean, you lost the bet?”
The bet? Who cared about that? She’d just admitted that she’d had no personal sexual experience while she was counseling on the air, and her listeners were concerned about the bet? “Dr. Jamie?”
“No, Lorraine. I didn’t lose. Because I walked into the situation with my eyes open. There was no seduction, no trickery. I’m fully responsible for my own actions.”
“Wow. So, uh, was he, you know, as good as he looks?”
Jamie felt as if she’d been punched. But she’d made the decision to answer any questions honestly. To speak only the truth, whatever the repercussions. “He was.”
“Man, that is so cool.”
“Are you telling me you’re not upset about my, uh, situation?”
“You mean the article?”
“Yes.”
“I can’t believe you got to be as old as you did without doing the deed, but, no, why should it bother me?”
“Because I’ve given you advice.”
“So has my priest. Your advice is better.”
“Oh.”
“You sound disappointed. Did you want me to be upset?”
“No,” she said, but she had to wonder if that was the absolute truth. “I just felt so guilty. Now, I’m feeling pretty foolish.”
“I have someone you can call,” Lorraine said. “Her name is Dr. Jamie, and she’s the best. She helped me see that I’m doing the best I can with what I’ve got, as long as I’m taking responsibility for my actions. That I need to be true to my heart, and that I need balance in my life.”
Jamie’s eyes burned with tears that she struggled to hold back. “Thank you,” she whispered. “More than you’ll ever know. This is Dr. Jamie, and we’re talking about life.”
Cujo took his cue, and Jamie leaned back in her chair, trying to figure out what had just happened. She’d been on the air for almost an hour with three different women. Not one had cared a whit about her virginity. They were curious about her reactions to her first time, and, despite her vow to be honest, she wasn’t able to talk about that. Not that she lied. She just explained that she wasn’t ready for the discussion yet.
The pain was so acute, maybe she’d never be ready. But then, how else could she turn this fiasco into something positive? There was a lesson here. She just wondered what it was.
At least she still had her show. Which was a bloody miracle. Marcy had clocked in a record number of calls, and Fred had been using the Post article to generate more publicity. So, was she nuts for feeling as if she’d been a fraud? That she owed everyone an apology?
The commercials were almost over, and for that she was grateful. Too much time to think led her straight down the tubes. She’d heard so many good things about Chase from people who’d known him for years. How could that be? Was it possible Marcy was right?
Four, three, two… “We’re back.” She scooted closer to the mike. “Our next caller is—”
“Dr. Jamie?”
At Marcy’s voice, Jamie looked up at the window. Her producer rarely interrupted her show, especially not seconds after a commercial break. “Yes?”
“Why don’t we talk to our next caller after we visit with our guest?”
Even before the door to her booth opened, Jamie knew it was Chase. She stood, wanting to run and hide, but there was only the one door. How could Marcy betray her, too?
Astonishingly, it wasn’t Chase who walked in. Her old nemesis Darlene Whittaker had come back to the scene of the crime. Oh, perfect. Jamie would have given just about anything to disappear from the face of the earth right now. Her anger felt like a burning coal in her stomach, and if she’d known the first thing about martial arts, Whittaker would be on her butt by now.
“Jamie?”
Marcy’s voice reminded her she was on the air. “Our guest is none other than Darlene Whittaker. Normally, Darlene writes magazine articles, but lately she’s been moonlighting for the New York Post. How nice to see you, Darlene.”
The woman of the moment didn’t seem very happy to be there. Where Jamie had expected gloating, she saw only discomfort. Jamie felt no sympathy.
“I’m, uh, sorry about all this.”
“Right. So, tell me, did you and Chase have this all planned out before you came to the station that night? Or was it an impromptu deal?”
“Chase didn’t know.”
“Uh-huh.”
Whittaker, pale in another black dress, this one boxier than the last, her hair pulled back in a tortoiseshell clip, swallowed, then turned for a quick glance at the door behind her. “He didn’t.”
“Want to tell me how you got this little tidbit of a headline?”
“I had someone planted in the coffee shop across the street.”
“Someone?”
She nodded miserably. “He was there in case anyone from the station came in. He was supposed to eavesdrop. See if he could get any dirt.”
“He must have gotten pretty sick of their apple pie.”
“He wasn’t there all the time. He knew when anyone from your show had a break. He timed it well, and he had one of the waitresses call. One of those times, he hit pay dirt.”
“All for little ol’ me?”
“Look, I’m sorry, okay?”
“Why?”
She didn’t answer for a long while. Jamie just sat still and waited.
“You want the truth?”
Jamie nodded.
“Not because I ran the story, but because it backfired. No one cares. The paper has gotten hundreds of calls. Vanity Fair wants to pull me and assign another writer to do the article on you.”
“I see.”
“Can I go now?”
“No. Why are you here, Darlene? You don’t want to be.”
“You know.”
“Tell me.”
“Chase. He brought me down here. He wanted you to know he didn’t spill the beans intentionally.”
Jamie’s relief should have been complete, but there was still one piece missing. She looked at Marcy. “Send him in, okay?” Marcy nodded.
“You can go,” Jamie told Whittaker.
The woman didn’t need a second invitation. The door swung open, she dashed out, and Chase walked in. God, her heart went crazy, beating as if it wanted to hop out of her chest. She could hardly gather a breath, and dammit if she didn’t start crying again. He hadn’t told, at least not directly.
He held out his arms to her, but she stepped back. “Wait.”
He let his arms drop. “What is it?”
“I need to know. Someone overheard you in the coffee shop. Who were you talking to, and why on earth would my virginity be part of the discussion?”
Chase stole a glance at Marcy, then his gaze came back to Jamie. “I was talking to your producer,” he said. “And, even though it was a confidence, I needed her to know all the facts before I made my final decision.”
“What decision?”
“In a minute. Marcy and I talked a lot that afternoon, and all either of us wanted was your happiness. My God, you have to believe that.”
“I’d like to.” He stepped closer, and this time she didn’t back away. His dark, soulful eyes made her want to run to his arms. But she couldn’t, not until this was all cleared up.
“Marcy was helping me decide whether I should stay or go. Leaving was pretty much the only option I could see. I never meant to care for you.”
“Remarkably, this isn’t making me feel better.”
“Give it another minute. See, there was something I hadn’t told you, something big.”
“Do I really need to hear this?”
“Yeah, you do. Jamie, my father died at thirty-five. My grandfather, my great-grandfather, they all died around that age.”
“Is it a medical syndrome?”
“Not that they’re aware of. But my mother, she called it the Newman curse. She’s always been pretty convinced I would go the way of the rest of the men in my family.”
“And?”
“And I’d seen what happened to her, to me, when my father died. I didn’t want to put you through it.”
“Is it a sure thing? No question, you’re gonna go in three years?”
He shook his head. “But it’s a damn strong possibility.”
“And you weren’t sure I’d want you under the circumstances.”
“That’s about right.”
“You should have asked me.”
“I know.”
She made the move this time. Right up to him, so she had to lean her head back to make eye contact. “Chase, I love you.”
“I know.”
“And I think you feel the same way about me.”
“I do.”
“So what the hell is the problem? If I lose you, it’ll be horrible, but infinitely better than if I’d never had you at all.”
“Are you sure?”
She sighed. “You love me, right?”
He nodded.
“So reverse the situation. If I were the one with the supposed curse, would you want me to leave today?”
His arms went around her back and he pulled her close. “Not on your life.”
“Yours, either.”
“It might really happen, you know. This isn’t a joke.”
“I’ll deal with it, either way, any way. But I’m still not sure why you told Marcy—”
“I told her because I wasn’t sure of the right thing to do. Marcy is your closest friend. I trusted her judgment. And I wanted her to look out for you.”
“What did she say?”
“She said I should stop being a damn fool. That if we love each other, that’s all that matters.”
“Smart cookie, that Marcy.”
He nodded. “I wonder if she’s smart enough to find a replacement for you.”
“What?”
“Because I’m stealing you right here and right now. You’re coming with me, and I’ll tell you what we’re gonna do.”
“Yes?”
“We’re gonna talk about love.”
“Okay.”
“And then we’re gonna do something about sex.”
“Okay.”
“And then—”
“Wait,” she said, putting her finger to his lips. “Let’s save the rest for just us.”
“Deal.” Then he leaned down and kissed her. The man who’d lied for her, fought for her honor, been so concerned about her well-being that he was willing to walk away, kissed her.
She kissed him back with all her heart and all her happiness. Just as she’d known in some deep, secret place that he was going to be the one, she also knew she’d have him for a long, long time.
Forever, no matter what.
He pulled back, took her hand and tugged her toward the door. She just had enough time to toss her headphones to Ted before she was swept down the hall and into the elevator. When the doors hissed shut, Chase did something very naughty and very wonderful.
She was the one to press the emergency stop.
Epilogue
Seven years later…
“HELLO, EVERYONE. Good morning. It’s Dr. Jamie, and we’re talking about life. My first guest this morning is none other than my incredible husband, Chase. Are you there?”
“Yep.”
“Happy birthday, sweetie. For those who don’t know, today is Chase’s thirty-eighth birthday.”
“Thanks.”
“Why don’t you tell the listeners what we did to celebrate?”
He laughed and, as always, even after all these years, it made her stomach do flip-flops. “We went to the doctor.”
“And?”
“We got me a complete physical.”
“Right. And what was the outcome?”
“I’m healthy as a horse.”
She grinned. “Now I’ll tell you about your other present.”
“What would that be?”
“Tonight, Marcy and Ted are going to pick up the kids for dinner, and they’re going to watch them all night long.”
“Oh?”
“And I’m going to…”
“What?”
She laughed. “Sorry. I’ll just have to show you. But I will give you a hint. The last time you saw me do this thing, you couldn’t stop laughing.”
He was quiet for several seconds. “Oh, really?”
“This time, I don’t think you’ll be laughing so hard.”
“Jamie, have you had lessons?”
“You’ll have to find out. And, my dear listeners, I just want you to know that while sex is wonderful, healthy, normal and exciting, it’s love that makes the world go around. This is Dr. Jamie, encouraging you all to go for it…”
ISBN: 978-1-4592-0013-5
GOING FOR IT
Copyright © 2001 by Jolie Kramer.
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Jo Leigh, Going For It
