Succubi Are Forever, page 22
I scrambled to my feet. “Oh, crap. Hi.” I brushed off my clothes and glanced around, but the field was utterly quiet. “Uh. Where’s Camael? And the demon?”
He watched me with fathomless eyes, his expression neutral. “They have been returned from whence they came.”
That was good, right? “So… Azazel and Camael are back in Heaven? That means Mae has gone back to Hell?”
He inclined his head.
“Is… Camael okay with that?” Because judging from Gabriel’s expression, the other archangel was not coming back.
A hint of arrogance curved Gabriel’s hard mouth. “Camael has been reunited with the Host. He is quite content. For him, living in dirt and squalor amongst humans became wearying quite some time ago.”
Gee. “Well, that’s good, I guess.”
Gabriel then turned his back as if to walk away.
“Wait,” I said sharply. “What about our deal?”
He turned to look at me, his face hard. “Our deal?”
I raised my wrist and showed him the word etched on my skin. “You promised me. Two haloes for a boon. You can’t take that back. You gave me your word, remember?”
He turned back toward me, his eyes narrow and ice cold. He moved so quickly that I thought I’d imagined it and then he was looming over me again, the power blasting off him making my hair ruffle in a nonexistent breeze. “Your thoughtless pursuit of my ‘favor’ caused the destruction of half of the fallen, and you nearly let a demon take not one halo but both of the remaining ones. And you feel you should be rewarded?”
He was furious with me. Utterly, coldly furious as only an angel could be.
“That’s right,” I said, getting pissed off myself. “I fucked up and I fixed it. You didn’t say how I had to get the haloes back to you, just that they had to come back. Well guess what? They’re back.”
“And in the meantime, you let a demon kill countless humans—”
“I didn’t let her do anything,” I yelled. “She did that of her own free will. And I stopped her.”
“And yet you did not stop her before she wiped out the vampires.” A dangerous muscle clenched in his jaw.
Realization dawned on me. “You… You’re upset that they’re gone? Not at me?”
“Of course I am upset.” He sneered the word at me, his gaze blasting fury as he stared down at me. “Even if my brethren have chosen the wrong path, they are still part of the Host. Each of them is still one of mine. While they lived, there was a chance for redemption. There was hope. Now they are all destroyed, thanks to your ineptitude.”
Hope began to flare through me and I clamped my hands together tightly. “You may not want to give me my boon, but you should hear me out.”
A sneer cut his face, cold and marvelous in its beauty. “And what shall you ask for, little one? Freedom? Riches? You already have immortality and beauty.”
Yeah, I’m so damn lucky aren’t I? I had immortality without the man I loved. “I want them back. The vampires, the succubi who were destroyed when the vampires were killed—I want them all back. I want them restored. Here, on earth. Just like things were before I got involved and messed everything up.”
He regarded me with what might have been a hint of surprise, if Gabriel allowed himself to show human things like emotion. “You would wish back the fallen?”
“I would,” I said, my throat aching with the need of that. “Oh, I would. Please. Please give them back.” Give Zane back.
He was silent for a long moment. “What you ask for is impossible.”
Anguish rocked through me. “You said I could ask for anything. That’s what I want.”
The archangel’s jaw clenched. “The queen has been destroyed. She cannot be restored. What she was cannot be re-created—she was a perversion, an unholy union of a demon’s power and dark magic. I cannot bring that back, nor do I wish to.”
I refused to budge. “You promised.” I held my wrist up, practically shoving it under his nose. “You promised me I could have whatever I wanted if I got this for you. Well, I got it. Now bring back my vampire and skip that queen business.”
“You do not understand. As long as the queen lived, they lived. If she cannot come back, then neither can the vampires. They were tied, their haloes bound to her.”
No, no, no. I pressed my fists to my temples, thinking. It was either that, or start screaming. I didn’t go through all of this for nothing. Zane was the goal. I forced myself to remain calm. “There has to be something,” I said, my voice wobbling. “Please. I don’t want to live forever if I can’t live with Zane. I don’t want to live another day if I can’t have him back.”
A hesitation. Then, the archangel spoke. “Their lives are tethered to an anchor. When the queen existed, she was their anchor. There must be another anchor for their souls to be connected to. Another queen. Do you understand what it is I am saying?”
I did. I stared up into his blazing eyes, hope flaring. “You need an anchor. Let me do it.”
“What you ask is not an easy task,” he said, his tone contemplative. “The weight of their sins will weigh upon you. My brethren have not lived chaste lives since they fell. Some struggle for their humanity, and as they do so, it will affect your own.”
“I don’t care,” I said quickly, lest he change his mind. “I can handle it.”
“The tether would have to be… adjusted. I cannot replace the demonic bond they had with the queen, but I can construct one given by me. And I will expect you, little sister, to bring them back.”
“Bring them back?”
“Bring them back to the Host. To the light. So many are lost in darkness. They cannot continue as they are, not without losing all that they have been. They are my brothers. I do not want them to be damned eternally—not when there is still a chance for them to return.”
“I can lead them,” I said. “At least, I can try. It might take a while to bring anyone back from the dark side.”
“They are immortals,” he said, and I could have sworn I saw a hint of pleasure in his cold eyes. “You have time. This is what you want?”
“It is,” I told him. “I want them back—the vampires, the succubi, everyone who was destroyed. I’ll handle any repercussions.”
He grasped my wrist and turned it toward him. As I watched, the word written on my skin flared and burned bright, then disappeared.
Gabriel leaned in, cupped my chin, and kissed me.
My brain exploded. Lights swam through my head, and my thoughts became… a swirling cacophony of minds, a spider web of thoughts. A morass of blood, need, darkness, wings, and pain. Loss. I felt a hundred tethers hooking into my mind, felt a hundred souls suddenly tied to my own. My head felt like it weighed a thousand pounds.
The weight of it made me stagger.
“Good luck, little anchor,” Gabriel said in a kind voice.
When I opened my eyes, the Archangel was gone.
I was alone.
I was the anchor. I’d… won?
I sat for a minute, trying to compose my wild thoughts, but they were too crowded, too turbulent. Zane, I thought, but I couldn’t make him out from the chatter in my mind. Surely Gabriel wouldn’t have tethered the vampires to me and not returned the one I truly wanted?
Surely…?
I closed my eyes and searched through my mind, but it was like looking for a needle in a haystack of thoughts, thoughts that I was too untutored to sift through.
My phone rang and I blinked back to the present. While I’d been sitting in the field, the sun had set behind the horizon and night had arrived, the skies purple with twilight. Nearby, a cow chewed grass and looked at me placidly.
I took a wobbling step forward. How long had I been standing there? I didn’t even remember standing. My phone rang again, and I pulled it out of my coat, hissing at the graze of my hand over the holy water. The stakes, the crosses, the rosaries strapped to my waist… they made my head feel… wrong, even though they weren’t hurting me. It was my connection to the vampires. I dropped the weapons belt where I stood and stepped out of it. As I flipped open my phone, I caught sight of my reflection. My eyes were glowing red.
Well… holy crap. That one was going to be hard to explain. I picked up the phone.
“Jacks! Are you there?”
“I’m here,” I said weakly. “Come and get me.”
“You’re alive?”
“I am,” I said. “We did it.”
PART III
QUEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“Once you’ve hit that pinnacle, it’s time to reevaluate your goals. Fame isn’t everything. An endless supply of sex isn’t everything. The money doesn’t seem so great over time (though don’t get me wrong, it’s pretty great to get paid for having sex). After a while, it becomes just a lot of meat dangling in your face and too many expectations.”—Sometimes It’s Not Just About the Fucking, by Remy Summore
~*~
We caught a red-eye flight back to New City, Wyoming and then drove out of the city. We headed to a destination that I’d only been to once before, but it was engrained in my mind. No one had to tell me where to go to find the vampires. I knew. I knew it deep within my core, and as if to prove me right, the closer we got to that destination, the louder the voices in my head became.
By the time we made it back to Wyoming, the low murmur of confusing thoughts had become a muted roar, and it took everything I had to sit still and be patient.
I was almost with Zane again. Only distance separated us this time.
“Jackie, honey, I’m not sure this is wise,” Remy said for the hundredth time. Her gaze kept flicking to my newly-red eyes. “I worry about you.”
“I’ll be fine,” I told her and forced a light smile to my face. And it was true. Once I saw Zane again, I’d be great. My fingers itched to touch him. To see his beautiful wings, feel his body against mine.
I could deal with a little bit of crazy in my head if it brought him back to me.
Remy pulled up to a long, circular driveway, the grounds achingly familiar. To my right, a stately pale mansion loomed before us. I knew that high, gabled roof. I knew those artful white columns that dotted the oversized porch. I knew the dozens of windows and even more than that, I knew what that enormous house contained.
She put the car in park and then turned to me. “You sure you don’t want us to go in with you?”
“I’m sure,” I said and then reached out and squeezed her hand. “This is where I belong now. You and Ethan need to have your life. Turn in that book. Go on tour.”
She frowned at me. “Are you ditching us? Is this good-bye?”
“It’s not,” I told her, and that was the truth. “It means we meet for cocktails and girl talk instead of being roomies.”
She beamed at me. “Now that sounds like a good idea to me. You sure they’re going to want you in this house?”
“I’m sure,” I said and knew it with every fiber of my being. It was mine now.
I got out of the car. To my surprise, Remy and Ethan got out as well, and Remy grabbed me in a hug, patting my back. Ethan wrapped his arms around both of us.
Tears pricked my eyes. Through thick and thin, they’d been at my side. I didn’t deserve friends as good as these two. “You guys are amazing. You know that, right?”
Remy was weeping, too. “I love you, Jacks. I know the last while has been hard on you, but you never once gave up. I hope you find everything you want in that house.”
I hugged her again. “I’ll call you. I promise.”
“You’d better,” she said, wagging a finger at me, her eyes wet. Then she turned and smiled up at Ethan. “Come on, babycakes. Let’s go see our kitty cat. I bet Angelbait misses us.”
“Of course, my divine flower of beauty.”
“If you’re good, I’ll even let you massage my feet before you start transcribing my memoirs into the computer,” she said as they shut the doors to the rental car. As it pulled down the driveway, Remy turned and waved back to me, then made a “call me” motion with her thumb and pinky.
I repeated the motion, indicating that I would definitely call her. I waited until they drove away, then turned to the house. I stood outside of it, staring at the front door. I hesitated a moment longer, almost terrified of what I’d find inside. What if it… wasn’t what I’d wanted? What if Gabriel was playing a cruel joke on me and I’d find the house abandoned, the thoughts in my head only the lingering aspects of the vampires?
What if I was crazy and this was just a psychotic break and Zane wasn’t coming back? I wanted it so badly I didn’t even trust myself anymore.
I put my hand on the doorknob, took a deep breath, and stepped inside.
I was in the foyer. It was clean and spare as I remembered it. A small end table near the door was covered in a wealth of dust, and my throat knotted at the sight. I looked around as I walked in. Everything was covered in dust, cobwebs dotting the fixtures overhead. It was as silent and unlived-in as a mausoleum. My heart tripped painfully in my chest.
Had the Archangel made a mistake?
My pulse began to pound at the thought, anxiety clenching my jaw tight. Please don’t be a mistake. The murmurs in my head continued, as wild and loud as ever. Don’t be a mistake, I repeated, and the voices in my head seemed to respond to my panic, muting and turning soothing. Encouraging me.
The sunken staircase lay ahead. I put a trembling hand on the railing and walked forward, down the steps. Once upon a time, I’d descended these steps and they’d led to a ballroom filled with excited women and handsome, dangerous vampires. I closed my eyes and took a step down, hand clenched on the railing. I was almost afraid to look. After a few slow, careful steps, I squeezed one eye open, scarcely daring to breathe.
Afraid of what I’d find.
Someone was standing at the foot of the stairs. I looked into the red eyes of a vampire I didn’t recognize, dressed in a tuxedo, the back of the jacket modified to let his wings hang freely. His gaze met mine, and as I took another wobbling step forward, he knelt in deference, bowing his head.
My queen, he said, and I heard it in my mind.
Hope. A wonderful burst of hope bloomed in my chest, and I nearly wept with exquisite, sweet emotion. A vampire. They were not all gone.
I took another step forward, and then more vampires came into sight, emerging from the shadows of the room. Dozens of them. All men. Beautiful, gorgeous men with red eyes and dark wings. And I could feel each of them in my mind, a shining thread of thought that would drive me crazy if I listened in. And I felt hope and joy at the sight of each face.
As one, they went to one knee and bowed in deference. My queen.
A hint of a smile before bowing. My queen.
Stiff anger and resentment. My queen.
The cacophony of thoughts threatened to overwhelm, and I forced my mind to absorb them—all their emotions overlapping. Hate, anger, distrust, amusement, and even affection whirled in my brain as they continued to approach and bow. Their salutes echoed in my mind as I stepped forward, wobbling. They were back. All of them were back, their minds linked to my own. There was Caleb, with the wicked tattoo around his eye. I felt his thoughts in my mind.
Well well, lovely. You are unexpected.
When my gaze focused on him, he bowed, a smile edging his hard mouth. Welcome, but unexpected… my queen.
I turned, staring at the men in the room, clutching my worn leather duster to my body. Where was he? Where was the one I wanted more than anyone else?
Where was Zane?
Princess.
A pure bolt of thought soared through the jumble of my mind. Yes! I’m here, I replied, a sob catching in my throat. I pushed my fist to my mouth, biting down on my knuckle to keep from breaking down into tears. I’m here.
My thoughts crashed through the others. I saw a few flinch away and I quieted my own mind, seeking that one soft word. Had it been my imagination? I needed to see. Needed to touch. Needed to know.
Princess, came the thought again, stronger. I pushed past two of the vampires who were straightening, their darker, mixed thoughts cluttering my mind. They weren’t sure what to make of a new queen. They’d never served anyone but Nitocris, but angels had been created to serve, and—
I put my hands to my forehead, unable to shut out the thoughts that began to crowd me. I wanted them to leave me alone. I wanted them out of my head.
But I had asked for this. Had known the consequences. I dropped my hands and dug my fingers into my palms, determined to ignore the rumbling in my mind. I willed my gaze to focus. I stepped forward in the room, and suddenly the vampires were parting before me, stepping back to clear the room, as if realizing that I needed space.
One man stood alone at the far end of the floor in front of the vacant throne.
I started forward, then stumbled at the sight of him, a sob breaking in my throat. “Zane.”
For months, I’d dreamed of seeing him again. Wanted to hold him in my arms so badly that my soul had ached. He moved forward as if in a dream, his steps slow and sure. He wore a duster identical to my own, one of his favorite black T-shirts on his chest. His wings swept the floor behind him, glorious in their inky depths. His eyes were bright red, his hair rakish over his brow. And he was smiling, a hint of fang gleaming.
I rushed forward, pushing into his arms. “Zane!”
“Princess,” he said, and I heard it echoed in my mind.
If this was a dream, I never wanted to wake up ever again. My gaze caressed him. He looked whole, uninjured. His wings were beautiful and sleek, unlike the trashed feather that I still carried in my pocket. My hands trembled, went to his cheeks. I felt the barest hint of unshaven scruff on his jaw. My fingers brushed his lips, warm and soft.
Tears spilled down my face. “You’re real. You’re here.”
