Galactic Cyborg Heat Series Book Bundle 5-8, page 5
part #5 of Galactic Cyborg Heat Series
She was waiting now. She wasn’t worried, she’d been through a lot but wasn’t ill or anything. The door buzzed, and Mac came back in, Kate offered a slight smile in welcome, but Mac was all business and sat down next to her. Kate got the feeling Mac was concerned.
“The results are back.” She told her. “The tests indicate that you were malnourished and dehydrated for months when captive and then it started to improve significantly, over the last month. Before that, you were fairly healthy but your diet could have benefitted from more fresh food, but I guess you know that. A hazard of Space living. There are some supplements we can give you to get you back in shape and here, we have plenty of fresh food, make sure you use it. There are also a number of classes I need you to join.
“They will help you, they’re important ok. And we can work on your fitness, get your muscles density back up to strength.” Mac stopped talking. That didn’t sound so bad to Kate, but she felt a ‘but ‘ coming.
Mac looked uncomfortable. “Spit it out Doc.” Kate told her.
Mac reached over and held her hand tightly. Kate thought this can’t be good. “Internally you have some scaring the med bed with more precise scans can deal with. It will put you out to fix the damage and won’t prevent you from having sex when you’re ready in the future. I’m guessing you were raped, more than once.” Mac asked her gently. Kate stilled. She didn’t need reminding. They hadn’t asked, and she hadn’t told them about it. It was over, done. Mac nodded. “Your blood showed indicators of two sexually transmitted deceases.”
Kate couldn’t move. Was this happening? Was it real? “We can treat both of them. We have experience of that here. We can cure you of both, but one is aggressive Kate, it could have made you infertile. We won’t know until the three-month treatment is completed and we have a handle on it.”
It wasn’t over. She was damaged goods, she knew that but now, they had ruined her future too? She didn’t even know if she wanted kids, but to find out she might never be able to have them? Kate wanted to scream. It took away her choices, took away her future.
She closed her eyes. Did it matter? she asked herself. No man was going to want her with this history anyway, and she’d have to tell them, she couldn’t live with the lie. She couldn’t do that. Who’d be able to get passed this anyway? It would always be there. In her mind and his, a wedge between them.
“Kate.” Hearing Mac call her name brought her back from drowning. “We can treat this. It’s not a problem until it is ok.” She told her.
Kate frowned at this caring woman and thought that in any other universe they could have been fiends. But she too would always see her as she was. Damaged.
“It doesn’t matter Mac.” Kate told her, more devastated than she could have thought possible. “Treat me. I have a life out there and need to get back to it.” She pulled her hand from Mac’s. She needed to get this done and be gone.
“If you want to talk to Blaz about it, I can go and get him here for you, so you can talk.” Kate wondered why Mac would want her to talk to Blaz about something so personal. He’d done his job, he didn’t need to be burdened with this.
“I don’t think so Mac. I hardly know him, and he’s done his job.” Mac gazed at her for a moment. Kate wondered if she’d said something wrong.
Mac patted her hand and smiled. “I see. Ok, we can start the treatment now. And after, I’ll have you taken to your room. Try and get some rest.”
CHAPTER THREE
“She doesn’t know you’re her mate?” Admiral Rage asked him. They were sitting in his office in the Security building in the Gallerea. It was the main social area of the Station, on the top floor with a view of the stars. It had been transformed since the pirate raid that had attacked it. He now knew, it was the same raid that had captured Kate and her crew.
Blaz shook his head. “No. She wasn’t ready to hear that. Being close to her these weeks has been difficult. She needs time and I need to get off this Station and kill something.”
The Admiral glazed over as he communicated with the computer system over his neuro net. Blaz’s data pad pinged. The Admiral came back to him.
“Last known co-ordinates for the pirates. Find them.”
Blaz smiled at his Admiral. This he could do. Giving a sharp nod, he left his office and walked out of Security into the Gallerea. The air seemed fresher here. He wondered how they did that. It almost seemed land based. He turned and glanced at Medical. Kate was in there. She didn’t need him. They would look after her now, he told himself, turning and walking away. Kate might not need him, but his people did. Despondent, Blaz headed for his ship.
***
“Tai Chi and Meditation?” Kate queried, she wasn’t sure what either of those things had to do with getting better. It wasn’t her thing at all. Mac nodded at her, she’d come back with lunch and some information on the programmes they were running, programmes they expected her to attend.
“Yes, every day at 9am. There are other things too, including self-defence, sessions with the Monks on a regular basis and working with me. They are all geared towards women and have a proven track record here. Along with working with the Monks on relaxation techniques, contemplation, anger management and body and mind therapy, this has gone a long way to helping a lot of women come to terms with what has happened to them. I want you to try the programme. Give it a month, then we can review it ok?”
Kate stood, “look Mac I know you’re trying to be helpful but I can’t afford to not be working for a month. I‘ve already lost several months. I’ll lose my contracts and then, all have to start from scratch. I’ve lost my crew, I need to talk to the Admiral about getting my ship back and need to fund a crew who’s willing to take me on, after what happened to the last one. Not a great recommendation now is it?” She started to pace.
“You don’t need to worry about the money. The Cyborg Empire will cover all your expenses. They have already made reparations to your crew’s families and secured your contracts. They will run them until you are ready to decide.” Mac told her like it was nothing. Kate stared at her. The costs involved in doing that had to be huge. She couldn’t afford any of that.
She started to panic. “I need to contact the Admiral. I need the costs levied against me so far and my ship back. I need to find work and quick. I can’t let this get out of control, I’ll lose everything I’ve ever worked for.” She started to struggle to breath.
“Kate you need to calm down. Your hyper-ventilating, you’re going to pass out….” Kate heard Mac, but her reactions were out of control. She didn’t cope well when not in control. She couldn’t catch her breath, things started to get dizzy, the last thing she remember, was falling.
Kate woke on her bed with Mac leaning over her. “Feeling better?” Kate took a couple of breaths, she did feel better. Breathing was easier. That was twice now that had happened. Kate frowned, she’d got over this problem when she was a child. Now it was back.
“Yes,” she told her feeling an idiot. Her worry over costs had got the better of her, she used to be better at dealing with this, she recalled. Dealing with stress, then the hyper-ventilation and blacking out, had been long behind her. Kate sighed, guess that had changed too, she realised. She was a liability not a strength right now. Those that were weak didn’t last in space, she’d seen it plenty of times. Nice move Kate.
“The hyper-ventilating, that been happening long?” Mac asked.
Kate shook her head. “Was a problem as a child, I kinda grew out of it, now,” she sighed, “I guess it’s back.” Mac nodded.
“It’s a stress and lack of control trigger but I’m sure you know that.” Mac told her. Kate nodded.
“You have a visitor, you up for that?” Mac indicated behind her. Kate looked over and Blaz stood in the doorway. The relief at seeing him just when she needed him, was overwhelming. Smiling she realised he looked worried for a second and then it was gone, and he looked as he always did. Quietly confident. She wondered if she would ever feel that again. Then realised they were both waiting for her answer.
“Sure, I’m good.” She sat up with Mac’s help, who passed her some water, then left them. Blaz took a seat by her bed.
“Thanks for coming but I’m ok.” She told him quickly.
Blaz just looked over at her. He had that knack of seeing things without saying anything. It was really annoying, thought Kate.
“Ok,” she blurted, “I got worried ok, the Empire is taking a lot on for me and it stressed me out and I passed out. No big deal.” She told him sulkily. She wasn’t proud of it, it just came out like that.
“Why?” He asked.
Kate tried not to fidget. It was a legitimate question, she got that. So why was she stalling in answering him?
“The cost.” She blurted out again. He didn’t answer so the rest just fell out her mouth. “I’m good at what I do but I can’t repay you for the transportation of fresh produce, the meds and all this,” she waved her hand around, “and now the Admiral is taking care of my crew and contracts. I can’t cover it. I don’t like being beholden or decisions being made for me,” she told him. “It tends to come at too high a price.”
Blaz sat forward. He was angry someone had upset her. “Who said your beholden?”
Kate looked incredibly at him. “I have to pay someone back Blaz. I’m going to own the Empire a lot of credits.”
He sat back. “No, you don’t. Any debt has been paid. You are a part of the Cyborg Empire now. You owe us nothing.” He told her honestly.
Kate frowned and shook her head. “That can’t be right Blaz.” She found that hard to believe. It was too much money. Blaz reached out and touched her hand.
She froze at the contact, then relaxed, he wouldn’t hurt her, she knew that. It was a light touch, just his fingers laying on the back of her hand. So big against her own. Incredibly gentle. Kate turned her hand under his and he gave a slight squeeze. Kate smiled.
“There is no debt. Not to me, not to the Empire. It’s not how it is here Kate.” He told her calmly, then let go of her hand and stood. Kate looked up. “I’m leaving soon with my crew. We have a job to do. Be gone for a few weeks. I hope to see you better when I return.” He really did hope for that, with every essence of his being.
Was he leaving her? Apprehension struck her hard. He’d be gone, and she would be alone again. She nearly reached out to grab him but held the impulse back and swallowed. It wasn’t the first time someone had left her, she told herself and she didn’t expect it to be the last. Maybe it was better this way, she reasoned. She was becoming dependent on him and that was never a good sign.
“Be safe.” She managed with a slight smile and a nod, glad her voice sounded strong. She didn’t feel it one little bit, her anxiety hitting her again. Blaz gave her a nod, turned and walked away from her. Was it selfish to want him to stop him?
Blaz turned while he still could and walked out the door. He’d instinctively taken her hand to sooth her and in doing so, battled his own demons. She’d looked so brave in that bed. Worrying over things, that did not matter to Cyborgs. They had more credits than they could ever spend. As his female, she could have everything that was his. He’d been so close to telling her that, but had held it back. He didn’t think she would take the news well. Kate liked to be independent. Liked being in control of her own life and decisions, he could see that. Doing things herself seemed important to her. It made little sense to him and was another reminder, he just didn’t know how to reach her.
Everything piled on again. It was too much, she couldn’t deal with this too. Kate rang for the nurse. She needed a sedative, needed to sleep. To shut off her mind. Find some peace in the chaos of her life. Blaz going seemed the last straw. She needed a time out and held back from screaming at the injustice of it all, knowing it would only bring Blaz back, when he needed to go. She pressed the buzzer again. A nurse came rushing in.
“I need a sedative now.” She told her shakily.
***
Blaz looked at the vid feed, then up at his crew. He voiced their mission for those whose neuro nets were compromised. “We have a job. There are at least a dozen pirate ships out there in our space. Our job, is to track and tag, take them down and kill if needed and bring the goods back for the Empire to use. Make sure we are ready to leave in 4 hours.”
His crew moved out. They knew the score. They had been his team for a very long time. Blaz’s mind drifted to Kate. She was safe here and in good hands. She needed time, there was no way around that. He’d have to give it to her, which meant he needed to be out of here. Seeing her daily would be too much and eventually, he would act on his instincts and that would cause her more pain. He needed to do something, be busy. Taking out some of the pirates in this sector, would make her safer and he needed to be busy. It was a job he relished. He’d get some payback for her, some justice. This, he could do for her.
***
“Your awake, good.” Kate looked over at the voice of Mac.
“No more sedatives Kate. I understand it was a tough day and Blaz leaving, hit you hard,” Kate went to protest and Mac have her the look. Kate kept her mouth shut. “It interferes with the medications for your other treatments, that can’t happen. You have a problem? You need to deal with it and work the programme ok?” Kate gave her a nod. “Good, we start now. Up.”
Mac hadn’t been kidding. She’d helped her up, got her into the shower, had breakfast waiting on her when she got out and as she sat down, handed her her timetable. It had a whole timetable worked out for her, 7 days a week. She’d put in her run each night after dinner and some muscle building exercises in the morning. Then there were classes. Breaks for lunch and drinks and that was it. No time to be idle.
Those first few days, Kate had struggled. The days seemed long and arduous. All her emotions raged. Anger, frustration, betrayal, shame, grief and denial, slowly led to acceptance. She worked the programme as Mac had insisted and quickly, the days became weeks, as she lost herself in it.
She was a reluctant talker at the best of times. Slowly she came to accept then appreciate, her time with Mac and Liu, the contemplative Monk, twice a week. It was hard for her. She couldn’t hide from what had happened. The process had been slow. Each session having its setbacks, angry outbursts, swearing and blame, but in the end, her frustration and anger became less, so did the swearing and blame, the tears started and she couldn’t stop, Mac told her it was a breakthrough.
Kate wasn’t so sure, then her emotions started to stabilise, she became subdued, thought more rationally through the discussions. She realised that everything that had happened, would have happened just because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time, just like all the others. Kate slowly accepted that. She still had days where she rejected the reality of things but they became less, acceptance and a wonderful sense of relief took over. They understood, didn’t judge, supported her to work through what she needed too, it helped to free her, to bring her some peace.
Mac poked her head around her door. “Hay, it’s your eight-week anniversary. You up for some company?” Kate smiled. Had she been here that long? The days had flown by, and she’d been worried about staying for a month! That initial cooped up feeling had slowly become a safe haven. Her thoughts turned to Blaz. They did that a lot lately, she realised. She hadn’t seen him in weeks and missed him. He’d only been by a few times between trips on his ship. He must be back and going off Station again, thought Kate warmly, he never left without saying goodbye.
“Sure.” But Blaz didn’t come around the corner, a small pixy of a woman came in behind Mac.
“This is Kim she is mated to the Admiral, Rage.”
Kate got up and held out her hand. She was an old-fashioned girl and habits were hard to break, even out here. “Kate, formally Captain Cassidy of the Scorpan Merchant ship.”
Kim took it and shook giving her a huge grin.
“I am so glad to meet you. I’ve been trying for weeks but Mac wanted to keep you all to herself for a bit longer. Can’t tell you how great it is to add another female to our group. As Mac said I’m Kate, Rage is my man. A delicious pain in my ass.” She told her giving her a knowing look. Kate wasn’t sure how to take that.
“I didn’t know the Station was short of females?” Kate told her.
“It is sadly following the pirate raid here a while back but, we are actively searching out females to join us at the Station. In the meantime, the mated are a select breed.”
Kate put her hands in her pockets. She didn’t know how long she would be here but joining any groups didn’t seem like a good idea. Her time would be up, and she had nothing to keep her on this Station. Her work was out there, working contracts. She’d never even had a contract to this Station before the raid. She’d heard of it sure, but that was it.
“So, we’re going for our usual girl’s dinner. We do it once a week and wondered if you wanted to join us?” Kim had been the one to ask. Kate looked between both of them. There was no pity in either of their faces. Kate breathed easier.
“I’m not sure I’m up to being in a crowd just now.” Kate told them honestly.
“No crowd just us.” Mac told her. They both looked at her expectantly.
She could eat. Kate mulled it over for a few seconds. “Ok, yeah sounds good.”
“Right I’ll come by and pick you up about 7.” Mac told her. Kate nodded. “We’ll see you later. They both walked out, and Kate wondered if she’d done the right thing. She didn’t want to get involved with these people. It could cause problems, getting too friendly was never good. Then she remembered she had more pressing problems, she had nothing to wear. Shit.
