The Prediction, page 6
It was pointless to go over the what ifs, but she did anyway. She’d wished Thea visited more often, and now she knew the reason behind Thea’s distance. Ted knew about Anna’s loneliness, but they didn’t discuss the subject. Now she knew why.
CHAPTER 9
On Monday afternoon, Thea opened her office door for her last patient of the day to leave, and found Monroe standing in the hallway. “You know you shouldn’t do that,” she said after her patient had left with her parents.
“What?” he asked, puzzled by her remark.
“Stand in the hallway in a counseling area. People like their anonymity.” She walked into her office, and he followed, closing the door behind him. She tidied up the little table where her small patients drew pictures, and Monroe settled in the leather chair in front of her desk.
“You’re a child psychologist. What do they care?”
“Their parents care for privacy.”
“Oh.”
“You were an investigator too long searching out people’s secrets. Lots of people want to keep their secrets quiet.”
“Probably. And that’s what you want too.” He dared her to disagree.
She couldn’t.
“When are you going to see your father?” Monroe asked, changing the subject.
Thea pretended to page through a magazine on her desk. “You can leave my office any time.”
“I’ll stay until I visit Luke. I thought maybe you’d like to go with me.”
She wondered what Monroe thought about her, and it made her uncomfortable. Maybe because he knew she could sometimes predict the future. Something no one else knew about her, except her parents, and they weren’t comfortable with that knowledge. Or her dad wasn’t. She wasn’t sure about her mother yet.
“Or you could come with me and see your father while I see Luke.”
Did he have to watch her while she fought the internal battle that she’d been struggling with ever since her mother had called about her father’s surgery. If she were honest with herself, the battle had begun before her mother’s message. Everything had changed since her visions of her father.
“My father is going to die.” Honesty, she reminded herself. She’d finally stunned Monroe, she realized, when he didn’t say something insulting right away. She snapped the magazine closed.
His eyes glittered in that way he had that made her nervous. “You know this for a fact? Because I haven’t seen anything written in stone yet. You can fight this, Thea. Fight for your dad’s life.”
“You’re talking about his possible murder, not his heart attack. You’re right. My prediction showed his murder and since that hasn’t happened yet, he’s going to survive the heart surgery.” She gave him a wry smile. She was getting all mixed up. “I’m sure he was at home, not in the hospital when he was shot.”
“Didn’t you ever want to refine those feelings? Dig into them? Figure them out?” He sounded frustrated and angry, and she wondered why.
“I didn’t want to figure them out. I wanted them to go away. That way my dad would love me.” Her voice faded at the end, and she remembered the times her father yelled at her, and she cried. All because she said something that became true. The lesson she’d learned was that truth wasn’t good.
“Well, the predictions stuck with you anyway.” He reminded her, but he didn’t sound angry any longer.
“Why were you getting mad at me?” she asked, and watched his eyes darken to emerald.
“One day I’ll explain, but we don’t have time today.” He sighed.
She wanted to argue with him, but she didn’t. For a moment she despised her passive nature. If she continued meeting with Monroe, she’d need to develop a spine.
“Do your predictions always come true?” he asked.
“Always.” It was her turn to sigh. “The ones I let myself see.”
“When you’re not hiding away.”
“Are you judging me? What right do you have to do that?” She threw her magazine at him.
It missed him and fell to the floor.
“Don’t you think you’re overreacting?”
She tried to ignore him, and the silence stretched. “No. It’s been a stressful week.”
“We’re both stressed out.”
She thought of Luke in the hospital. She shouldn’t have made the prediction. That’s what came from being angry. “I’m sorry about Luke, too.”
“That’s not your fault. He had problems.”
“He looked happy at the party.” She thought about the pranks Luke pulled. Always joking, smiling.
“He likes you, and he’s good at hiding his feelings. He’s been depressed since we were teenagers. He tried to kill himself when he was fifteen, and I’m not sure he didn’t try again this weekend.”
“He did?” She began to question her intuition.
“He did, so don’t start blaming yourself for what he did yesterday. He played chicken. End of story.”
“But...” She started to object and stopped. She didn’t want to take the blame. Didn’t want the accident to be her fault. Didn’t want it to be a case of him trying to prove something to her.
Monroe changed the subject. “Are you coming with me to see your dad?”
“Yes. I have no choice.” Her cheeks flushed and anxiety mounted. If he died, she would never know why her visions upset him so much. Before his heart attack, she could have called him at any time and demanded answers. This could be her last chance, and she didn’t feel ready to take it. Somehow, she would dredge up her anger to replace the fear and face her parents. She was grateful that Monroe didn’t argue with her and tell her the old cliché that there was always a choice.
“How long does it take for your predictions to come true?” Monroe gazed at the floor. “You said you thought your father would be murdered. When?”
Hearing him say murder out loud made her father’s predicted death so real. She tried to concentrate on his question. “Usually within a month.”
“We don’t have much time, and unfortunately your father’s not going to be much help until he feels better.” He talked through the possibilities. “You hired me to help you stop anything from happening. Sam, one of my men, is still watching his house, making sure nothing happens, and watching for anyone who might be planning his death.”
A spark of hope flared, then fizzled. “I’ve never managed to stop anything from happening.”
“You didn’t have my help.” He lifted his head and winked at her.
She smiled. She couldn’t believe she smiled. “Were you always this sure of yourself?” She watched his eyes dim, before he recovered. She knew he was going to lie.
“Always.”
CHAPTER 10
The walk through the hospital to the patient rooms passed in silence. Thea assumed Monroe thought about Luke, but her own thoughts centered on her parents. She wanted them to acknowledge her as normal. Like anybody else. Except that as their daughter, they should think she was better than everyone else. Perfect. Too bad she could make predictions. Now her father was ill, and she and Monroe might not be able to save him. Her guilt annoyed her. It wasn’t her fault.
“It’s not going to be that bad,” Monroe said.
She wondered what specifically he meant.
“Your thoughts. You were miles away.”
“That’s where I want to stay.”
“No, you don’t. Time to face the music, Thea.” He stopped walking and stood in front of her. She tried to walk around him, but he grabbed her arm.
“You’re hurting me,” she said, yanking her arm away, although his grip didn’t hurt.
He let go, though he stayed in her way.
She glared at him. “What?”
“You know what. You can’t run forever.” He stared back, and she refused to be intimidated. Although she knew his fierce look and above average height would scare some people, she realized she wasn’t afraid of him. Today she’d seen the gentleness beneath the surface veneer.
“Do I look like I’m running, you big jerk? I’m here, aren’t I?” She knew he was referring to her predictions and not her parents. “I’m going to see him. Them. I feel responsible, and I don’t know if I can save him, and you don’t need to make the situation worse. Now leave me alone.” This time he let her pass him, although he followed her. Her gratefulness didn’t extend to letting him know that his presence reassured her. He probably already knew, the big lump of granite. She promised herself she wouldn’t cry.
Monroe’s presence comforted her as she walked down the hallway toward the elevator. The elevator chimed, and the door opened. A man carrying a baby held the door for his wife. Monroe and Thea stepped inside, and when the doors closed them inside, they weren’t alone. A frail older woman clutched her purse to her chest.
Thea pushed the button for the third floor and smiled politely at the woman. “Which floor?”
“Third,” the woman said, but didn’t return the smile.
Maybe she’s in pain, Thea thought. The elevator doors pinged open, and they let the older lady go out first before they exited.
“Which room is Luke in?” she finally thought to ask as they walked down the hall.
“3133.”
“Thank you,” she said to Monroe.
“For what?”
“You know. Letting me get mad at you and not getting upset.”
“I was upset.” But his eyes gleamed.
“Thanks anyway.” They walked down the hall toward the nurses’ station.
He looked at her, and she shook her head. “I’ll go alone. I have to.” He nodded, as if he’d known all along that’s what she would say.
“I’m here to see Luke Gage,” he told the woman behind the desk.
“Sure, Dr. Carter, you can go in,” the woman said with a pleasant smile.
Grateful for the time Monroe spent chatting with the woman, Thea took a deep breath, needing to calm down.
With a final word to the unit secretary, Monroe turned back to her. “Chin up.”
Like she was an-eight-year-old. But she lifted her chin and put her nose in the air, only to lower it when she saw her mom coming down the hallway behind Monroe.
“That’s my girl,” Monroe said, but she ignored him.
Her mom hurried down the hallway toward them. Thea stepped around Monroe. Her mother’s hug seemed to last forever, but it wasn’t long enough.
“Darling. Baby,” her mom said as she pulled away to get a better look at her, before pulling her closer for another hug. She was crying. “It’s so good to see you. It’s been a long day.”
“I know. I had a lot of patients, Mom.” She turned around to take a breath and introduce Monroe if her mother hadn’t already met him at the hospital, but he was walking down the hall in the opposite direction.
“Is he a boyfriend?” her mom asked.
“Just a friend.” Her tone prohibited further questions. “Did I tell you he used to be a private investigator?”
“Yes, on the phone. We can talk about him later.”
Thea didn’t tell her mom that Monroe already had a guard on their house. This didn’t seem like a good time, and it could wait.
“Your father’s doing okay.”
“But you’re worried anyway. Tell me what happened today, and then we’ll go see him.” Thea could put off the moment a little longer.
“Let’s go into the waiting room.” Her mom glanced at the nurses’ station.
Thea saw two nurses pretending to work but listening to their conversation. She knew they were a matter of speculation to the staff. “Okay.”
CHAPTER 11
A low-pile burgundy carpet covered the floor in the ICU waiting room. Flecks of gray and black gave some contrast. Eight burgundy-cushioned chairs were positioned in a simple U-shape and finished with end tables on each corner. Anna and Thea settled into the rough cloth chairs.
Neither one said anything as they stared at each other, and Anna drank in the sight of her daughter. “I was wrong,” she said, filled with regret over the lost years. “I should have begged you years ago to talk to me.”
“I can’t see you begging,” Thea said. “And I should have made an effort to tell you. Dad was so insistent, and I’m afraid I let my hurt feelings get in the way.”
“I should have talked to you.”
“But you didn’t.”
Anna heard the accusation in her daughter’s voice and tried to keep the sting from hurting too much. She stared steadily at Thea, although she wanted to avoid her daughter’s stormy gaze. “I’m sorry. Nothing I say can make up for those years. I can only repeat that I was wrong and hope somehow you can forgive me.”
“I can’t be what you want me to be.” Thea said.
Anna regretted every time she hadn’t spoken up in Thea’s defense, and as much as she wanted to blame Ted, she had been responsible too. No way could she erase Thea’s distrust, but she would do what she could from now on to ease the pain of her daughter’s insecurity and let her know she loved her. “You’re exactly what I want. You’ve always been my beloved daughter.” She put every ounce of sincerity and love that she could into her tone.
“Why didn’t you ask me?” Fear and doubt filled the question.
“I thought you didn’t want to talk to me. You were so angry, and I thought that you’d get over your anger and talk to me. That’s what your father said.” Her shoulders slumped. “He was wrong. You never did, and I thought you hated us, so I left you alone.”
“I never hated you,” Thea said. “Okay, so I did hate you for a while. That’s normal for any person.”
“You don’t anymore?” She couldn’t keep the intense hope from her words.
“I don’t hate you.”
Anna held back from giving Thea another hug, telling herself to take it slow. Don’t scare her away. But she couldn’t keep the words from escaping. “I love you.”
“I love you too, Mom.” Tears shone in Thea’s eyes, and she pulled out a tissue from her pocket and wiped her nose. “We need to talk about this now. For Dad.”
“And for you,” Anna said. She tried to project all the love and acceptance she felt for Thea into her words and her gaze.
“Seeing the future. That’s a wonderful gift, Thea,” she said.
“You might not think so after awhile.” Thea’s face showed a hint of annoyance.
“Time isn’t going to change my feelings. Because of you, Ted has a chance.” How could she explain the past to Thea? Ted’s fear for his daughter had infected Anna, and so she’d succumbed to his feelings. Ted, who helped everyone else, became so strict and unbending when it came to their daughter. Why hadn’t she asked herself why only Thea received that treatment? She’d hid from the truth. “I guess I’ve always known. Your father...” She hesitated.
“Dad was afraid.”
The conviction in those words opened Anna’s mind to a possibility she hadn’t considered. Or had she considered it but avoided the truth? Ted. His dreams. The mammogram. No. She looked down at her breasts and stopped her hand from touching them only because Thea brought her back to the moment.
“You took Dad’s side,” Thea accused.
Years of hurt were built up in Thea. It would take time for her and her daughter to heal. That realization plus her suspicion of the meaning of Ted’s dreams unsettled Anna to the point she thought she’d faint. “I’m sorry.” She shook her head to clear it, and the waiting room came back into focus.
#
Thea realized two things. Her mother loved her, and she had aged. The last thought scared her. Ten years with her mother had slipped away, and she wasn’t going to lose any more time. And her father? Had she missed the opportunity to tell him she loved him and say goodbye? He hadn’t accepted her ability to predict the future, but she loved him anyway, and believed he loved her. “Can I see Dad?”
“Yes. He’s sedated and not very aware of what’s going on, but if you say something to him, he’ll know you’re in the room.”
“I want to go in alone,” Thea said. She didn’t know whether she’d wake him.
“But I...”
A white-coated, wild man interrupted them. Or so Dr. Mark Gray seemed to Thea, with his thick tawny hair like a bush on top of his head. She placed him at about forty years old.
Dr. Gray hugged her mother. “Anna! I’m sorry to hear about Ted. How’s he doing?”
“He was restless earlier, but physically is doing okay.” Her mom moved out of his embrace and stood on tiptoe to pat at his hair. Although he wasn’t very tall, maybe five foot eight, her mother stood tiny in comparison. “Thea, meet Dr. Mark Gray. Mark, this is my daughter.”
“Hi, Thea.” He smiled at her, a real smile, as if he were truly glad to meet her and not fulfilling the obligatory expectation. He held out his hand, and she shook it, warmth radiating along her arm. “You look like your mother. I’ve noticed that when I see you in the halls.”
She blushed and let go of his hand. Her mother laughed. “He’s full of blarney, so watch out.”
Thea forced down the blush and asked, “Are you Irish, Dr Gray?”
“Not at all.” He put his hand to his chest. “Everything I say is in all seriousness.” Then he spoiled the words by winking at her. “Please call me Mark. Dr. Gray makes me feel dull and old.”
Her mom said, “You know you’re anything but dull and old. Thea, he’s a scoundrel. Remember that.”
Thea thought there might be a note of warning in her mother’s voice.
“As much as I’m enjoying our talk, I need to speak to Anna for a few minutes.” His smile stayed the same, but she sensed a new note in his voice. One she didn’t want to decipher.
“About Dad?” she asked, wondering what the internist had to do with her father.
“No. Another patient. I need to consult with Anna.” He winked again, and her mom swatted at him.
“Quit flirting with my daughter. We’ll be back in a minute, Thea.” She tugged him away as he smiled at Thea over his shoulder.
