Broken Boys Despise Deceit: A Second Chance Romance, page 8
Zeke reaches over and clasps my shoulder in a firm grip, then squeezes.
We return to silence for the last few minutes of the drive, and Zeke’s comforting hand never leaves my shoulder.
“There’s no way a human can fit into this. It’s way too small,” I say, holding up a tiny suit thing with buttons in the crotch.
Zeke laughs and takes it from me. “You’ve seen a baby before, right?”
“Of course I have. But not, like…up close.”
“Oh, my God.” Zeke rubs his temples for a moment, then straightens. “Right. So, I’ve got two baby-making machines for sisters, okay.”
I nod, having no idea what his sisters have to do with these ridiculously tiny clothes.
He holds up the suit I was just looking at and points to it. “I’ve been buying baby clothes since I was fifteen. This one is for a newborn to say…around three months old.” Then he points to another. “That one would be for a six-month-old, probably. I mean, all babies are different—some are fat, some are little string beans—so some stay in certain sizes longer, and some outgrow them crazy fast.”
My brain is starting to hurt. “So how am I supposed to know which size is the right one, then? I haven’t met her yet. I don’t know if she’s fat or skinny.” And then I remember Carter sent me a photo this morning when they were getting her ready to put in their car to go home. I pull my cell out of my pocket and find the text.
“Here,” I say, shoving it in Zeke’s face. She looks like a cute little baby to me, and I have no idea what is considered fat or not for an infant.
I know nothing about babies. I’m going to be a terrible uncle.
Zeke snatches my cell and oohs and aahs over the picture. “Aww, look at that gorgeous little chunk of love.”
“So does that mean she’s chubby?” I ask.
He nods. “A little. I love squishy babies. Here, you’ll need something around this size,” he says, handing my cell back, then picking up another suit I’m sure is too small. He must read the skepticism on my face, because he rolls his eyes and says, “Just trust me.”
I take the outfit and cringe. “It’s kinda ugly.”
“So, pick what you want, and I’ll tell you if it’s okay.”
That I can do. I go through all the racks—and there’s a lot—holding up different ones that he either nods or shakes his head at. After fifteen minutes, he’s holding a pile that reaches his chin.
“I think you’re good, my man,” he says. “She can only wear one thing at a time, and she’ll grow fast.”
Shrugging, I explain my logic. “Babies crap and spew a lot. I don’t know how much time Carter and Chance had to get stuff for her with this all happening so suddenly.”
We head to the registers, and on our way, the tiniest pair of pink trainers I’ve ever seen catch my eye. I snag them too. Loading everything up on the counter, I smile at the chick behind the register as she rings it all up, then hand her my credit card because babies are fucking expensive.
Zeke and I both load up with bags and stroll out the exit. “I can’t believe you just dropped two hundred bucks on—”
I don’t hear anything else that comes out of his mouth after a tatted chick cradling a tiny baby to her chest walks past me, and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I freeze, then turn, my gaze following her across the parking lot toward the store.
Her head is down as she coos at the baby, long blonde locks cascading over her shoulder. I can’t tear my eyes away, trailing her until her steps falter, and slowly, she turns around. She lifts her face, and I get my first look at the woman I haven’t seen in over a year.
Scout.
My gaze drops to the baby in her arms.
I can’t breathe.
I can’t move.
I feel him before I see him.
Anxiety washes over me like floodwaters as I ever so slowly turn around, and there he is. Mase.
My knees wobble, and his face pales. He blinks sluggishly, the bags in his hands dropping to the ground before he takes a staggering step toward me. I swallow hard. My grip around Harley tightens on instinct, causing him to squirm, so I gently rock him. He prefers to be in constant motion.
I knew this moment was coming sooner than later, but I thought I’d have more time. I thought it would be on my terms. I’ve only been back in town a few hours.
Such an idiot. When has anything ever worked out the way you wanted it to?
Licking my lips, I know I must face this head on. I refuse to cower, despite the quivering of my insides. His gaze lifts to mine, and I move forward, meeting him halfway. “Mase,” I murmur.
His eyes dart down to Harley again, then back to mine. “Is that—” He cuts himself off, scrubbing a hand over his mouth. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, then he asks, “Is that your baby?”
All I can do is nod as he puts two and two together. Tension radiates off him in waves, and I’m so damn nervous I could cry. I do that a lot these days.
He’s quiet for a long moment, staring at a dark curl sticking out from Harley’s little beanie. I know what comes next. The question I’ve been dreading since I found out I was pregnant.
In a low, hoarse voice he asks, “Is he mine?”
Tears prickle my eyes, and I blink them back. My lips quiver as I force the truth past them. “I don’t know.”
“Does that mean he could be mine?” another male voice asks, and I whip my head to the right where Kass stands, his hands buried deep in his pockets, hurt and confusion shining in his eyes. I was so focused on Mase I didn’t even notice Kass.
I can’t do this.
My heart pounds, and I can’t draw in a full breath. My chest rises and falls rapidly, and sparks shoot across my vision. Harley wails, and tears spill down my cheeks as I desperately try to gain control of myself.
I have to get out of here.
My knees quake, so I take a step back, but my wobbly legs can’t hold me anymore, and I start to go down. A shrill scream bursts from my lungs, and I wrap myself tighter around Harley. Strong arms curl around me, and I’m hauled into a broad chest.
Black spots take up most of my vision, and my starved lungs burn. I can’t breathe. The pounding of my thundering heartbeat fills my ears. I can’t hear anything beyond it. Panic bubbles in my veins…
Harley.
Chapter Ten
She goes limp in my arms.
The only thing stopping the baby from falling to the ground is how tightly I have her pressed against my chest.
“Fuck,” I growl, then Kass appears at my side. “Take the baby.”
He reaches between Scout and me.
“You got him?” I ask.
When he nods, I loosen my arms a little, giving him space to lift the baby out. His little face is wet with tears as he screams his tiny lungs out.
Kass looks at me with wide, panicked eyes. “What do I do with him?”
“I don’t fucking know. Cuddle him or something.”
“Jesus Christ, what the fuck are you two doing?” Zeke’s stern voice demands. “Give him here.” He takes the baby from Kass and cradles him against his chest, smoothing a big hand up and down his back and swaying in place.
Zeke looks ridiculous, but the baby begins to settle. My gaze drops to Scout. She’s pale and sagging against me. I scoop her legs up and carry her bridal style to my truck. I’m halfway there before I notice Kass isn’t following. I look over my shoulder, and he’s standing in the exact same spot, staring at the ground.
“Get your ass over here,” I call.
He lifts his eyes to mine, blinks, then nods and jogs over. “Sorry,” he murmurs, rubbing the side of his neck. “What’s going on, Mase?”
“I don’t know, but we’re going to find out,” I tell him. His question to Scout floats through my mind, and I narrow my gaze on him. “Why would you think the baby is yours?”
Kass straightens his shoulders and glowers at me. “Because we slept together before she left.”
Fuck. Me.
I take a threatening step toward him when Zeke moves between us, the baby now sleeping snuggled in a little ball against his chest.
“You’ve got bigger fish to fry right now,” he hisses. “Save the macho bullshit for when you’re not holding an unconscious woman in the middle of the Target parking lot.”
Fuuuck! I swallow and drop my gaze to Scout again. She looks tired, but her breathing has evened out, so that’s something. Kass opens the back door of my truck, and I lay her across the bench seat, then take a step back, and we all just stand there, watching her.
“Well, this day took a turn that I, for one, did not see coming,” Zeke says, swaying in place again.
I glance at him from the corner of my eye. His hand braced on the baby’s back is nearly the same size. My throat thickens as I stare at the baby. My baby?
Shaking my head, I shift my gaze to Kass. He’s looking at the baby too. I swallow. His baby? The thought sits heavy in my gut. I don’t like it—like, at. Fucking. All.
Why would she sleep with him? When did she sleep with him? We were together the night before she left… My eyes sharpen on Kass, and I hiss, “What the fuck did you do to her? Did you do something to make her leave?” I take a step toward him, but again, Zeke inserts himself between us.
“Simmer down. Now is not the time. How about you go get some water for when she wakes up,” he says to Kass. “And you…you can take the baby. I’ve got a phone call to make.”
Kass stalks off, and I frown at Zeke, palms out in front of my body. “I can’t hold him. I don’t know how.”
Zeke rolls his eyes and extends the scrunched-up baby to me. He presses him against my chest, and I’m forced to wrap an arm around him. “Make sure you support his neck,” Zeke instructs as he pulls his cell from his pocket and touches the screen a few times. “See, you’re a natural.” He holds his phone to his cheek and turns away.
Christ, I’ve never held a baby before. My heart squeezes painfully as I peer down at his perfect little face. He’s freakin’ cute. And he might be mine… I stroke my fingertip down his soft cheek to his pursed rosebud lips. He shifts in my arms, and his little eyelids flutter as he wakes.
Blue. His eyes are blue. He blinks up at me, and we just stare at each other. He squirms, then his tiny arms stretch up, his hands clenching into fists as he arches his back, and a huge yawn opens his mouth in a perfect O.
Oh fuck, that’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.
I’m startled out of my baby daze by Scout’s husky voice, and I step back within view of the open door to the truck. She’s sitting up, her eyes wide. She’s white as a ghost. When her gaze finds me, it shoots right to the baby, and her shoulders instantly relax. She extends her arms for him, and I tighten mine.
“Are you sure you’re okay to hold him? You just had a massive panic attack and passed out,” I say, eyeing her trembling hands.
She swallows, wrings her hands together in her lap, and murmurs, “I don’t know.”
“There’s a lot you don’t seem to know these days,” I say. Fuck, the words are out of my mouth before I have time to process them, and she flinches. Double fuck. I grit my teeth, but I won’t take it back. I can’t.
“I’m sorry, Mase,” she whispers. “I didn’t know what to do.”
“How about talk to me. That would have been a great start instead of running away. Did you know you were pregnant when you left? Is that why you left?” I have so many questions I have to bite my tongue to stop myself from asking them all at once.
Footsteps crunch across the graveled parking lot, and I glance over, finding Kass approaching with a bottle of cold water. He hands it to Scout when he’s close enough, then steps back, sliding his hands into his pockets.
She drinks the water greedily at first, and I’m about to tell her to slow down when she lowers the bottle from her lips, her gaze shifting from me, to Kass, then down to the baby I’m still holding. “Is he okay? I didn’t drop him, did I?”
I shake my head. “You held him real tight.”
A flash of relief crosses her face, then she closes her eyes and rests her head against the backseat. “I’m sorry,” she repeats, probably so Kass can hear it this time.
Zeke returns, smiling as he looks at me. “Looks good on you, bruh,” he says, clapping my shoulder. “Okay, let’s get this show on the road. Milo’s at home; he’s going to check Momma out.”
“What?” Scout asks. “Who’s Milo?”
“My boyfriend,” Zeke says. “He’s a nurse, and he just got off a long shift, so let’s not keep him waiting.”
Right, of course. Scout should get checked out after passing out like that.
The baby squirms and makes a cute-as-fuck little sound, so I smile down at him and realize I don’t know his name. “Before we go anywhere, what’s his name?”
“Harley,” Scout murmurs, her eyes locked on him as he wriggles in my arms. “I can take him now.” She extends her arms.
I don’t want to hand him over.
I like the slight weight of him against my chest.
I feel sluggish and woozy, but I need to hold my baby.
Mase shifts on his feet, looking down into Harley’s adorable face. It’s a sight I wasn’t sure I’d ever see. My heart swells, and my lips lift in a small smile, but then the crushing weight of my decisions comes crashing down over me.
I never wanted to have children. I never wanted a man in my life.
But then Harley came along and turned everything upside down, opening a part of me I didn’t know was there. I never knew I could love something as much as I do my son. And now I know what it is to need someone, because I need him as much as he needs me.
I reach for him, and Mase lifts his gaze, nods, then places Harley in my arms before he fingers the dark curl sitting on his forehead. “He has curls,” he says, breathing out.
I know what he’s implying. Harley has curls just like Mase does. But then my eyes flick to where Kass is standing, a silent observer in the background. He’s not just an observer, though. He’s a part of this, and I need him to know I’m sorry for how I behaved.
Zeke speaks up again, drawing everyone’s attention. “You got a car here?” he asks me.
Nodding, I point across the lot. “Over there, the silver Nissan Rogue.”
He follows my finger, then extends his hand to me, palm up. “Keys,” he says. “I’ll move it closer, then drive you.”
“I can take them,” Mase says.
“No can do, dude. The rugrat needs a car seat,” Zeke explains.
I dig my keys out of my pocket and drop them into his hand, then he’s off. Roughly two minutes later, he pulls in three spots over from Mase’s truck, then comes over to us. “I’ll get the little love nugget strapped in,” he says, taking Harley from me.
I’m still half out of it from the panic attack, so I let him. I do know him—he was around long before I left—but everyone feels like strangers to me now. I kept such a huge secret from my friends and, in doing so, put a wedge between us all.
He returns a couple of minutes later, extending a hand to me. “My lady,” he croons.
Zeke has always been one to try to lighten the mood. And I’m glad for it. I take his hand and scoot across the seat. I’m still unsteady on my feet, so he wraps an arm around my back and guides me over to my car. He opens the door, and I climb in, then drop my head to the headrest. “Thank you,” I whisper as he fastens my seatbelt for me.
I could have done it, but it feels reassuring being taken care of.
He cups my cheek in his big palm and grins down at me. “Girl, things were getting dull around here. I’m glad you’re here to put some life back into this place.”
Tears prickle my eyes again, and I grit my teeth. No more tears. I’m so sick of crying.
Zeke drives us to his place, Mase following in his truck, Kass behind him. When we pull into the driveway, Zeke gets out, retrieves Harley, then ushers me inside. Mase lets himself in a minute or so later, then Kass knocks before entering.
I’m situated in the middle of a big, comfortable, gray couch with Harley on my lap and one guy seated on either side of me. A tall dude I don’t recognize strolls through the entry in a pair of purple scrubs, and that’s the moment it hits me—Zeke said he has a boyfriend.
I frown as Zeke approaches the guy, his cheeks pink, a huge smile on his face. He sweeps the guy’s bangs from his eyes, cups his cheek, then kisses him softly. My eyes widen as I take it in.
I guess I’m not the only one who’s changed since I left…
Milo checked my blood pressure, pulse, oxygen levels, and a few other things. Then, he gave me the all-clear under the condition that I’m not alone for the next twenty-four hours.
I’m sitting in the front passenger seat of my car in Milo and Zeke’s driveway while Mase and Kass argue about who is going to stay with me tonight. I’m seriously tempted to climb into the driver’s seat and leave them to each other. But I caused this mess, so I need to let them handle it however they want right now.
I hit the button on my door to roll down my window, then suggest, “We all need to talk, so how about you both come to my place?” Unsurprisingly, they continue glaring at each other. Harley lets out a little wail, and I check the time. “Figure it out, guys. Harley’s getting hungry, and I need to feed him.”
“Fine,” they say in unison, and it’s super creepy.
“I’ll leave my truck here and pick it up tomorrow,” Mase says, then rounds the hood of my car and gets in. He’s squished in behind the wheel like a pretzel, and I snort. He glares at me, then reaches down to the side of the seat and starts pressing buttons. “How do you move this thing back?” he grunts.
“The lever on the side moves the seat up and down, the one at the front, down between your legs, moves it forward and back,” I tell him.
He adjusts the seat, then extends his hand to me. “Keys.”
“You don’t need them. As long as they’re in the car, it will start.”
