Finding Him: Second Chance Billionaire Romance (Finding Love Book 1), page 27
“I think he should stay here.”
In my heart, I know it’s the right thing to do. Logan is close with his uncle and if it wasn’t for me, he wouldn’t hesitate to bring him here.
“You want my uncle to stay here, with us?”
I go quiet. This is where my predicament lies. I’m pretty sure Logan won’t agree to this if it means me moving out, but on the other hand, I’m not sure I could handle being under the same roof as that man.
“This arrangement was never permanent.”
“What does that even mean, Brooke?” he asks, frowning. “Are you breaking up with me?”
“What? No. I love you,” I say, resting the palm of my hand on his cheek.
“I love you too, but if having him here means I’ll lose you, then the answer is a definite no.”
“I had a feeling you’d say that, but we always knew that I’d move out eventually.”
“I don’t want that; I need you here. My home is nothing without you in it.”
I sigh. “Well, I’ll just need to find a way to deal with having him around, then.”
“I don’t want that either. If it’s going to make you feel uncomfortable, then again, the answer is no.”
“He’s your uncle. He needs you.”
“I know, but you are my life. You’ll always come first.”
His sweet words bring a lump to my throat. “He’s family and has nowhere else to go.”
By family, I mean his family, not mine. He may technically be my father, but I can’t ever imagine myself looking at him that way.
“You have the kindest heart. You always put other people’s wants and needs before your own.”
“I had a good teacher,” I say. “That’s exactly how my mother was with everyone.”
“I wish I could’ve met her.”
“Me too.” A sadness washes over me just thinking about it. “She would’ve loved you.”
“I’ll let my uncle come here on one condition.”
“What’s that?” I ask.
“If at any stage it gets too hard for you, you need to tell me. This is your home, and I don’t want you feeling uncomfortable.”
“Okay.”
“I mean it, Brooke.”
“I know.”
“I’ll call past the hospital on my way to work and discuss it with him.” Lifting his head, he looks at the time on the clock. “Speaking of work, I don’t have to get up for another half hour.”
Logan effortlessly drags my body over his, and I can already feel him hardening under my weight. “I wonder how we can pass the time?”
Flipping me back down onto the mattress, he settles between my legs. His mouth moves to my jawline, as he trails kisses down my neck.
Blindly reaching for the drawer beside the bed, he retrieves a condom. “I plan on spending it inside you.”
He uses his big strong arms to push himself into a kneeling position. My eyes follow his every move as he rolls the condom down his impressive length. Although we’ve been intimate more times than I can count, my body still vibrates with anticipation as I await his next move.
Cupping his hands behind my knees, he pushes my legs toward my chest and spreads me wide. “Here with you, is, and always will be, my favourite place to be.”
For some reason, his words fill me with dread. I’ve never felt as close to anyone as I do with him, but I know how cruel life can be, and how fast things can change. My marriage to Jake is the perfect example.
“I hope what we share never changes.”
“Never,” he says with such conviction I feel tears sting my eyes.
My hands reach up to cup his face. “Promise me.” I know it’s unfair to even ask, but the insecure side of me needs to hear it.
“I promise I’ll love you until I take my last breath. Even then, I won’t stop.”
“What I feel for you, it scares me at times,” I admit.
“I feel the exact same way.” He shifts his body until he’s completely covering mine, and I anchor my legs around his waist. Grasping my wrists, he drags my arms above my head and laces our fingers together. His eyes never leave mine as he slowly sinks himself inside me. “You consume my every thought … my every breath, and that will never change.”
My eyelids flutter close as he withdraws slightly before rocking his hips forward, filling me completely.
A part of me wishes we could stay like this, lost in the moment forever. “I love you,” I whisper.
“I love you too … so damn much, sometimes it hurts.”
Butterflies churn in my stomach as I sit in front of the television, trying to distract myself. Logan texted me half an hour ago to say he was on his way back here with his uncle. Although I was trying to do the right thing by suggesting he come and stay here until he’s fully recovered, I’m now having second thoughts.
Just thinking about being in this house with him, with nowhere to escape, makes me incredibly anxious.
“I’m heading off now,” Jill says, coming into my view. “Is there anything I can get you before I go?”
Take me with you. “No, but thank you.”
“Dinner is ready to be dished up when Mr. Cavanagh and Mr. Sanders arrive.”
“I appreciate that, Jill.”
“I’ve made up Mr. Sanders’s room. I’ve put him at the end of the hall to give you and Mr. Cavanagh some privacy.” I nod. “I’m looking forward to having him stay. He’s such a nice man.”
“So I’ve been told.”
I place the remote down beside me. Everybody seems to forget all the awful things he said, and how poorly he treated my mother. There was nothing nice about that.
Lowering her bag to the floor, she takes a seat beside me. “I know this isn’t easy for you, dear,” she says, placing her hand on my leg. “But I think spending some time together will do you both some good. A chance to get to know each other better.” I shrug my shoulders because it’s easier than voicing my true feelings. “Just give him a chance.” I give her a half-hearted smile. What chance did he give my mother, or me, for that matter? She sits there silently for a moment before standing. “I’ll see you in the morning then.”
“Okay.”
She leans down and places a soft kiss on the top of my head. “It’ll all work out. Just have faith.”
Her words do nothing to calm me. If anything, they only increase my uneasiness. I don’t want this to come between me and Logan, so I’ll be polite, but having a relationship with that man is the furthest thing from my mind.
Standing, I head into the kitchen and pour myself a glass of wine. I’m not much of a drinker, but I manage to consume the entire contents of my glass in two large gulps before pouring myself a second one. I need something to take the edge off.
I’m busy setting the table when they finally arrive. “Hey, babe,” Logan says, crossing the room to plant a chaste kiss on my lips. He has a suitcase in his hand, which I presume is John’s.
“Hey. Dinner is prepared, I’m just setting the table.”
My eyes remain on Logan. I can’t bring myself to look in John’s direction.
“Hi, Brooke,” John finally says, and my gaze briefly darts to him.
He looks much better than the last time I saw him. In his hands, he’s holding a wooden box about the size of a shoebox. The sweet smile on his face has my stomach in knots. I’m in two minds; for Logan’s sake I’m glad he’s here, but I feel like I’m doing an injustice to my mother.
My eyes move back to the table before I answer. “Hi, John.”
“I appreciate you letting me stay here until I can make other arrangements.”
I force a smile and nod. I don’t trust myself to speak.
“Jill made up the room at the top of the stairs,” I say as my attention moves back to Logan. “I’ll get dinner dished up, while you take John’s things to his room.”
I don’t even wait for a reply before turning and heading towards the kitchen.
I busy myself placing the prepared food onto plates. I’m so lost in thought that I don’t hear Logan enter. He startles me when his arms slide around my waist from behind.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I lie, glancing at him over my shoulder.
“Remember our deal?”
“Yes. Honestly, stop worrying. I’m good.”
“Okay.” I can hear the uncertainty in his voice, but I’m grateful he doesn’t push further. Instead, he places a soft kiss on my cheek. “Let me help you with these.”
“That one is John’s,” I say, pointing to one of the plates. The less I have to interact with him, the better. “And this one is yours.”
He picks them both up and heads towards the dining room. I take in a few deep breaths, preparing myself to sit down for a meal with a man I have absolutely no respect for. I usually love this time of night when Logan and I get to unwind as we share stories of our day. The way I’m feeling right now, I’ll be lucky if I can keep my food down.
“How was your day, babe?” Logan asks the minute I’m seated.
“Good. Busy.” I shrug.
I’m usually more detailed, but tonight I feel awkward talking about myself in front of John. I don’t want him to know anything about my life.
My eyes move to Logan, and I find him watching me intently. I’m not good at stuff like this. I thought I’d be able to fake it through the next week or so, but now I’m not so sure.
“How are the plans for the concert coming along?”
“Good,” I say. “It’s chaotic, but an organised chaos, if that makes sense.” I force out a smile. “How was your day?”
My eyes quickly dart to John as I await a reply from Logan, and I find him staring at me. I wish he’d stop.
“My day was pretty uneventful.”
“Your sister called me this morning; she wants to do lunch one day this week.”
“That’s nice,” Logan says, his face lighting up. “I’m glad you two are getting along.”
“She’s a good egg, that one,” John adds, trying to insert himself into our conversation. I begin eating, hoping that they both follow suit. “This is delicious, by the way. Did you cook this, Brooke?”
“No, Jill did,” I reply with my eyes still focusing on my food.
It’s funny; when I was a little girl, before I knew the depths of betrayal this man bestowed upon my mother, I would’ve given anything to sit and have a meal with him. Anything.
“Brooke’s a great cook, though,” Logan says. “You might get to taste some of her cooking while you’re here.”
I clear my throat before shoving a fork full of food into my mouth.
“I’d like that. Your mum was a great cook too. It must run in the family.”
My head snaps in his direction, and I’m thankful that I’m still chewing because my response to that statement wouldn’t be a pleasant one. I’m pretty sure the look on my face says it all. How dare he bring her up like that. He has no right to reminisce about my mother.
Logan’s hand moves below the table, coming to rest on my leg. He gives me a sympathetic look before focusing his attention on John.
“After dinner, we can head into my home office and discuss what we’re going to do about Kathleen.”
“Sure,” he replies as a look of sadness washes over him.
When I see it, I instantly feel bad. My emotions are giving me whiplash. I’m all over the place. The last thing he deserves is my compassion, but my traitorous psyche doesn’t seem to comprehend that notion.
Thankfully, the rest of the meal is eaten in silence.
“I’ll clean up here,” I say once everyone is done.
“Let me help,” Logan replies, standing.
“No, I’m fine. You two go and do whatever it is you need to do.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
He leans over the table and places a kiss on my forehead. “We won’t be long.”
“Take your time.” I’m hoping by then I’ll be in the safety of my bedroom.
As I collect the plates, Logan moves around to where John is sitting and helps him stand. Again, I’m filled with empathy. It’s like an internal battle raging inside me; I want to hate this man, but a part of me won’t allow it.
“Morning, beautiful,” Logan says, nuzzling his face into my neck. My back is plastered to his front, and I’m wrapped tightly in his arms. It’s a place where I feel safe.
“Morning, Hot Stuff.”
He grilled me last night when he finally came to bed, but I remained strong and tried my best to reassure him that I’m okay with John being here. It’s not like it’s permanent, and I’ll be working extra hours over the coming weeks, so that’s going to make things easier.
“Don’t make any plans for tonight,” he says, running his tongue along my skin.
“Why?”
“I’m taking you out?”
“Really? Where?”
“It’s a surprise,” he says, sucking my earlobe into his mouth. “And you’ll finally be able to wear one of those dresses I bought you.”
“So, we’re going somewhere fancy?”
Excitement bubbles inside me. It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to dress up, and I’ve been dying to wear one of my new dresses. However, my enthusiasm dies the moment John enters my mind. Chances are, he’ll probably be going with us, and that definitely puts a damper on things.
“Yes, just the two of us. I’ve organised for Jill to work late so my uncle won’t be alone.”
A huge smile breaks out over my face, and my eagerness returns. “Are you at least going to give me a hint?”
“Nope,” he says, throwing back the covers and rising. “Like I said, it’s a surprise.”
“But I don’t like surprises,” I retort, pouting.
“You’ll like this one.”
I sit up the moment he disappears into the en suite and leap from the bed, dashing towards the walk-in robe. I wish I had more of an idea of where we were going. It would make my decision regarding which dress to wear a little easier.
Pulling the baby blue dress out first, I hold it in front of me in the mirror. “Wear the black one,” Logan says, startling me.
Swinging around I find him in all his naked glory, leaning up against the architrave. My eyes drink him in. This man is flawless.
“And you need to wear something that shows off this,” I reply, closing the distance between us to run my fingertip down his sternum and over his abs.
“Is that so?”
“Ah huh,” I say, looking up at him through my eyelashes.
“Keep looking at me like that,” he replies, pulling my body into his, “and I’m going to be late for work again.”
“You’re the boss, so it’s not like you have anyone to answer to.”
He chuckles. “Actually, today I have to be in court, so I’ll have the presiding judge to answer to.”
“Ugh.”
Bringing his face forward, he captures my bottom lip between his teeth. “I promise to make it up to you tonight.”
“I’ll hold you to that.”
“I don’t doubt it,” he says, slapping my arse.
“What time do I need to be ready?”
“I’m hoping to be home around five, so I can have a quick shower and change. I’d like to leave here by six at the latest.”
I wish I knew where he was taking me, but I trust him when he says I’ll like my surprise. He hasn’t disappointed me yet, and always goes above and beyond.
Chapter 43
Brooke
Butterflies churn in my stomach as I descend the stairs that lead into the great room. I’m secretly praying that John is still in bed. I noticed his bedroom door was closed when I passed.
“Shit,” I mumble under my breath when I reach the bottom and see him seated at the dining room table. His head is bowed as he flips through today’s paper.
Lifting his coffee to his mouth, he raises his head and his gaze moves straight to me. The smile that bursts across his face hits me right in the chest.
“Morning, sweetheart,” he says.
“Good morning.” I’m not sure how I feel about him calling me sweetheart. “I hope you slept well.”
“I did. It was great to be back in a real bed, and no longer hooked up to those machines.”
I force out a smile as a wave of guilt flows through me. Despite everything I feel towards him, this man took a bullet for us.
“I bet,” I say, moving past him into the kitchen.
“Morning, dear,” Jill greets as I enter.
“Good morning, Jill.”
“How are you this morning?” she asks, running her hand affectionately down my arm. “You were on my mind all night.”
“To be honest, I’m struggling.”
“Poor thing,” she says. “You’re not running this morning?”
“No, I have a big day at work. Our end of year concert is coming up, so I have routines to finalise.”
“Can I get you a coffee?”
“Please.”
“Do you want muesli and yogurt for breakfast?”
“Thanks.”
I stand there stalling for a moment until Jill eventually shoos me out of the kitchen. “Go sit, I’ll bring it out to you.”
As much as it pains me, I have no choice but to join John at the table. He closes the paper and puts it to the side the second I sit down and gives me his full attention.
“Do you have any plans today?” he asks, and I hate the hopeful look I see in his eyes.
“Just work.”
“Oh, I was hoping we’d have a chance to spend some time together.”
“I’ll be gone most of the day,” I say, trying my best to remain polite.
I’m surprised when John reaches out to place his hand on top of mine.
“Sweetheart.” My gaze darts back to him and I have the urge to pull my hand out from underneath his, but I don’t. “I know this isn’t easy for you, but if you could find it in your heart, I’d like the chance to explain.”
“Explain what, exactly?” That you’re a cheater, a liar, a baby killer?
“My marriage to Kathleen was purely one of convenience, you could say. We had a mutual admiration between us, but never love.”
