ETCH, page 16
She realised her father had never had that with his authority. He had less elves, and they all cowered from him. He was feared, not loved. There was so much love in this mountaintop oasis, and so much beauty under the canopy of rock, houses and shops lining every few paces with strait rows and walkways. Every shop owner greeted her with conversation rather than a sales pitch. Laughter could be heard echoing in every corner of the magnanimous space. She loved it.
As she walked through the tiny town, hidden from the rest of Zoriya, Ilva noticed all the warm earthy tones around her, there were spice coloured sheers draped back and forth across alleys like giant streamers. Light did occur in the deep cavernous refuge. It came from glowing stones above, small blazing bugs flying overhead, and lanterns adorning each doorway, they all reflected through the streets in various fiery colours. Copper and gold shone off of the walls of rock.
The homes in Evevale seemed to be carved out of the inside of the mountain, until she noticed the points where clay and rock met. Everything blended in to give the appearance of a termite colony on a mass scale. Spires of rock still met with the top of the mountain inside, the homes and streets were built around these obstacles. Brick coloured paths in perfect curving lines spiralled the innermost part of the city, connecting to smaller thinner paths in between each home.
This made navigation tricky, yet also gave multiple routes to wherever you needed to go. Ilva had an urge to see what the city would look like from above. Too bad there was nowhere scalable above her, for her to climb up and see the marvel.
Ilva was content. She told Bryn about her family, and what had happened with her mother. She told her most of the journeying with Vali, leaving out the details that occasionally reddened her cheeks. She continued from them meeting in the forest all the way through to the mountain they were in now. Bryn listened intently as Ilva loosed all the thoughts that threatened to break her from within. She felt lighter after talking about everything. It was hard, then it was easy.
Ilva opened up more, about how her mother was with her before, and the regret she felt after her loss. How she was confused about her father, and who or what he was to her. Everything came pouring out. She really felt she could talk to Bryn.
She was so used to elves with stern faces and firm expectations. This is why she was always grateful when Vali smiled for her, and now she was grateful again, when Bryn recognized her pain.
After a while Bryn spoke, “That’s enough. No more tears. Feel the good, accept the bad, and focus on the facts. What is in and outside of your realm of control here? That is the only advice I can give. You are strong, and I know you will take from these words what you need to. I have faith in your ability to heal your pain, Ilva.”
Ilva stared dumbfounded at Bryn. For a brief moment she was a bit thrown off by having genuine good advice so simply put. Then she thought about the many ways that Bryn had been respectful while listening. She may have been blunt, but she was comforting to talk to. She listened well, just like Vali. Ilva appreciated the consolation. She embraced Bryn.
Ilva thanked her, and Bryn told her that anytime she needed someone to talk to, she would always have ears for Ilva. They continued working until a couple figures started moving towards the entrance, it was Vali and Odys. They had returned.
Ilva was overjoyed to see Vali. She ran towards the front of the crowded cavern. She had to dodge a little elf toddling his way along next to his mom, she did not want to trip on the wee guy. Gosh he is a cute little one! Ilva gushed to herself. This was the first time she had ever felt fondness towards children, these elflings exuded such happiness and it was infectious.
She reached Vali panting and hugged her, “Vali! I am so glad.” Vali blushed a bit, she knew she was surrounded by other elves, she could feel their breath and hear their feet on the stony floors, it was awkward having their affections displayed with an audience present. She was glad Ilva was safe though. They embraced a moment longer, then Ilva released her and greeted Odys.
Vali listened to the conversation between Odys and Ilva, noting the easy wit and comfort level. She heard Ilva mention that Bryn was a wonderful hostess. She mentioned that he must be proud of this beautiful place. Vali was curious, but did not ask. She followed the sounds of their voices through the city as they talked, and after much greeting, everyone began to disperse again. Returning, each of them, to the chore or task they were doing before the excitement of a new face disrupted them.
Vali was glad they were not overwhelming her. She was worried when so many elves approached. They were an excitable bunch, but they were good fun to listen too. She heard many comical, lighthearted, and good-natured conversations going on around her as she wandered through the cave community. It made her feel, relaxed. There were no awkward silences when she passed, no one yelling “Thief” through the market square, no one calling out their prices or products. Was this even a town?
These elves were outrageously good natured. Vali was surprised that her grandfather held such authority with them. If he was indeed the leader of this underground establishment, then he should be praised, Vali thought. This elf, who has known hardship, loss, suffering, and burden, for him to be the one giving to others, and to this degree. His followers all seemed so peaceful. Vali’s eyes glistened. She smiled with silent contentment. So far, your story lines up, gramps. She was honoured to be related to someone who was so remarkable. Someone who fought for dragons and elves of every race. But am I worthy of such an honour?
When Vali fully realised the repercussions of all her mistakes her feelings attacked her, I don’t think I’m so great. I killed an ally dragon, stole an artifact for a tyrant, started a war for love. I cannot even protect myself in this war. Why am I even here? Ilva would be safer without me near right now. I have brought her nothing but misfortune. I know she told me that she did not mean what she said, but what if she did? Am I really the reason for her suffering? Is everything my fault? Vali’s conversation with her conscience was unknown to Ilva, who would have been sad to hear.
Vali kept slandering herself. Forgetting anything she had ever done with good intention. Painting herself the villain in everyone’s life. She imagined the sounds of war echoing in the caverns. She imagined Falil being burned to the ground and the citizens being enslaved. She imagined Ilva in chains, crying and hungry. All the most negative of thoughts, the worst of possibilities, played out in her mind like some horrifying reality to come.
Eventually her thoughts told her, Ilva is happy here. Why did I come? I was worried for nothing. I should just go. I can get the artifact back and end this war. I should do that. Since I am the one who started this whole thing. She took all the responsibility that was not hers to shoulder, and wore it heavily, allowing it to crush her into feelings of solitude and secrecy. She felt a sharp sting in her memories “Love has no secrets.” She shuddered, and then sharpened her ears to listen to what her gramps and Ilva were discussing now.
Chapter 49
Ilva was, in fact, talking about food. She was going on and on about the delicious stuff they had eaten in Karna; a hot meat and veggie pie with chicken, peas, potatoes and carrots. She was gushing amorously about this blueberry pie with meringue on top, and how fluffy it was, “Like biting into ginger beer foam! Only if it were a touch firmer and made of sugar!” she exclaimed in delighted tones.
Vali was enamoured with Ilva’s adoration of food. It was cute. Vali loved the sound of Ilva’s voice when she was happy. It was like music for her soul. Vali felt a sensation of eyes on her, then it was gone. Odys, Vali, Ilva, and Bryn walked up to a hut at the edge of the cavernous town, and Odys opened the door.
He was still beckoning them in when they walked through the threshold. Ilva was darting her vision excitedly over all the different pieces of art in the room, and the massive shelves of books. The leather spines went all the way up to the top rafters in the hut. A ladder was planted against one side of the shelves, a bit sloppily. It irked Odys, who went and rearranged it. Picking up a few heavy looking weapons that were in the middle of the floor, clearly belonging to Bryn, and put them outside the door on a rack. The kitchen was disastrous, and Odys looked appalled.
“Bryn!” he thundered, “This is absolute chaos! Gods and goddesses!” He whined as he picked up a bowl from the floor with tiny little flies sticking to it, and floating above it. He looked as if he may throw up in disgust.
Vali was smiling at the theatrical voices that escaped gramps as he whizzed around the room clearly overwhelmed and compelled to clean.
Bryn seemed unbothered by all the excitement gramps was having over the state of their home. She went and pulled chairs up to a small table in the dining area, which was really just a square table against the wall right next to the kitchen. It was a small hut, and it seemed like the bookshelves took up most of it. A large blackish brown pelt lay upon the floor in front of the centermost part of the shelves. A tiny table sat with three short legs on the pelt, and a small stack of tomes atop it. There was a window across from the door they had come in through, and a tiny cupboard was under it, with intricate wooden designs.
The door had matching designs, and the kitchen was no contrast either. It was even more notably ornate being that there were so many of the tiny cupboards. Odys reasoned with Ilva that many small cupboards made more sense, with the two of them they only had two of each thing, so dishes needed little space. Also, the variety of kitchen items they had was vast, and none of the items would fit comfortably next to each other in large cupboards. Ilva only began to see the logic in this when Odys went clean crazy for the next couple hours, he straightened and dusted everywhere around the bookshelves and entry point. There was mud to be cleaned, and clothes to be picked up.
Bryn appeared to be a rather untidy elf, Ilva wondered why either of them needed so much stuff, she thought the question rude the moment she considered it. Who am I to judge? a voice in her mind sassed her.
Bryn had a barrel resting in the corner of the room, on the other side of the table from the kitchen. She walked over to it with a dirty cup and filled it with the contents that escaped a tiny spout. She snapped a flap back down over the spout, and pulled her drink to her lips. She took a big swig, and then walked back to the table. “Want some wine? We can share this cup while Odys cleans.”
Ilva was good on the cup, she saw the horrors around the room. Vali did not and seemed to care little about the smell coming from the kitchen behind them. She took a gulp from the cup, and seemed happy for the gesture to share the wine with Bryn. Ilva tried not to be too grossed out over the cup, it was just a dirty cup. Odys, however, was thoroughly grossed out, and took it as a cue to begin cleaning dishes. He pumped what looked to be steaming hot water into a basin on the counter. Ilva was curious and came to assist him while Bryn and Vali drank their wine.
Vali was now fully aware that Odys and Bryn lived together. She wondered what her grandfather was to Bryn. Maybe they are a couple? It does sound that way. It was an enchanting thought, a break from her negative spiraling, Vali was pleased that Odys had others in his life, her guilt still nagging quietly at her about the death of Europeas. She went back to the dreary spiral.
Why, why did I kill him? Why did I not try to get Ilva to run away instead? Why did I slay him? She was racked with pain over it now that the picture in her mind was bigger. The wine seemed to be having the wrong effect on her. Her problems were being magnified. She was panicking, and she was overwhelmed.
Bryn seemed to sense this, and put a hand on Vali’s. This pulled Vali back into the room, dragging her out of the mountain pass memories. She was smelling the wine again, and feeling the warmth from Bryn’s hand on hers was bracing her somehow. It rooted her.
Bryn spoke to Vali, “Do not drink if you're hurting inside. It will make you hurt outside too, and then you will have something else to overthink about in the morning.”
Gramps has a good friend, she thought before quiet words tumbled over her trembling lips. “I feel guilty about killing Europeas, and like I’m always making wrong choices,” Vali confided quietly.
Bryn took that in. When it was clear Vali was still self sabotaging, she told her, “Everyone makes the wrong choices, and often more than once. That’s life. Make a plan, and the gods and goddesses laugh.” Bryn chuckled. Vali did not.
Bryn sighed. “Every choice you make affects something. Your choices can shape the world, the lay of the land, the air we breathe, the water we drink. Everything in this world has the power to be affected. Everything in this world also has the power to affect. We are all capable of making ripples, and sometimes we make waves. Wrong or not, choices will be made, and you will have to keep making them.”
Vali considered all that Bryn had just given her to think on. She thought it was the most impactful thing she had ever heard in her life.
Chapter 50
When Ilva came up behind Odys he was so focused on his task he nearly turned and bumped right into her on his way to grab a dish rag and towel. She jumped back a step, and his eyes went wide at the almost collision.
“I was just wondering, well, would you like a hand?” Ilva chimed.
Odys beamed at the offer for help. “Absolutely! If you do not mind that is? I would really appreciate it. Do you want to wash or dry?”
Ilva thought on it, “Wash I guess?”
Odys was even more surprised, “Sure! The water gets pretty hot, so if it gets too steamy, we can wait a bit or add some of the water in the jug on the floor over there.” He pointed at the end of the cupboards to a large glass jar that went up to Ilva’s thighs.
Ilva walked up to the sink and put her hands into the basin. It was so soothing, having her hands in the warm water, her bones didn’t seem to ache as badly, and her muscles felt looser. Soaking her sore hands and tired arms was immeasurably pleasant.
Odys saw and offered, “We do have a tub shed out back if you and Vali want to rest yourselves in the bath after?”
Ilva was positively glowing at the idea, “Oh that would be amazing! I do love a good bath.”
“Wonderful!” Odys grinned.
Ilva was now in an inquisitive mood, “Where does the water come from? Why is it so boiling hot?”
Odys was impressed with Ilva’s curiosity. He loved a wondering mind. “It comes from under the mountain. There are hot rivers and springs all underneath us here. We have found ways to take advantage, and provide the town with running hot water, when we release the water it goes into a different stream which leads to the sea. It is pretty creative, one of the sylvite elves here came up with the idea!”
Ilva registered what he said with thrill. “There are sylvite elves here?”
Odys laughed, “Of course! We try our best to all be equal here. Even my wife, Bryn, is a sylvite.”
How many coincidences could there be in the world? Apparently, a lot. Ilva looked over to see Vali and Bryn having their heart to heart. Bryn’s hand supported Vali’s as she spoke. Ilva was glad to see Vali talking with her.
Bryn watched Vali, gauging how to react, and had given her the cut and dry approach to her worries. Which was nice and easy, for that was also how she got through to Odys most times. Especially on days when his compulsory need to clean overwhelmed him. Rationalising, and pointing out the things that were sometimes forgotten in moments of stubbornness or pain, this was Bryn’s specialty.
Vali was suffering before Bryn simplified the concept of choice. The realisation that the world was bigger than her, yet still needed her, that she wasn’t alone in her mistake making, was the most comforting thing in the world. All she could do was her best.
Vali understood well now that all of her actions would impact something, and she had to pick her battles carefully. She knew that someone would always get hurt, no matter which side of a fight you picked. That was becoming clearer. Choosing, often means to deny one course, which may have its own set of consequences. Sometimes she would lack the knowledge. Sometimes she would lack the skill. Life will not make way for those things. It will not give you another chance. Most of the time, when life demands you act, you get one opportunity to pick the action you go with. Then the conditions or situations change. All creatures are bound to make errors in judgement. Vali was no different.
Vali took a long moment to accept herself. To believe that she might be allowed forgiveness. Then the bars of guilt slammed her back into her fear.
Bryn knew what happened, she felt Vali tense again. She knew it wasn’t going to be a lasting sensation, yet it was still important to have Vali feel it. It takes practice to believe in yourself. Vali would get there, she was smart, and had already felt the forgiveness settling into her heart. Bryn thought she was an incredible individual. She saw so much of Odys in her.
Odys and Ilva were finishing up the last few dishes, Ilva watched him placing each item in its own little spot in the cupboard. It was organized down to the last angle, everything the same distance apart, it was as if all the everyday items had suddenly come together to create a home that looked like art. Ilva was so impressed with Odys and all his fine attention to detail. The place was immaculate. It was only more impressive after seeing all the stuff that had been strewn everywhere beforehand. With it all tucked away now, the place looked cozy and inviting.
Odys mentioned the bath now again in front of Vali and Bryn. Vali seemed equally grateful to the offer, and followed Odys and Ilva out back to a tiny bathhouse.
When they walked in there was an immense amount of steam in the room. It was damp and warm and sweat began beading upon each of their brows. Odys explained how to start and stop the water pump. It involved a series of laborious looking actions, but was much easier in practice to do. Ilva ran the water and Vali gathered any of their belongings that weren’t their clothes to give to gramps. He took them and said they could soak out here for as long as they liked. Before leaving he pointed at a couple of tasselled ropes on the wall. “If you want to change the scenery just pull the ropes.” And with a small wrinkly wink he headed back inside.
