Dark Swan Ebook, page 20
I barely succeeded in not rolling my eyes. Well, this was going to be so much fun.
Aurel gestured to a seat beside him. “Come and sit. I promise I won’t treat you like this unholy pig does. Honestly, have you thought more about staying in Summer with me?” He leaned forward, grinning like a bear. “Best part: It’s better than here.”
“Anywhere seems better than here right now.”
Aurel breathed in, opening his mouth as if to speak, but Setizar cut him off.
“Meris. I will be walking the grounds later. I wish for you to accompany me.”
Aurel scrunched his nose, his eyes darting between Setizar and me.
“I think we should spend some time alone, and clear things up.”
“Does this mean you’re finally going to tell me that thing you said you weren’t?”
Setizar’s laugh was dry and humorless, an airy thing woven from stars and sea foam. “No.”
I half wanted to jump up and knock him upside the head, the other half of me wanted to turn my heel and not look back.
“Let’s eat first. No one should make decisions before breakfast.” Aurel patted the seat beside him with a bit more passion than before. “Bad decisions are made on an empty stomach.”
“Shut up, Aurel,” Setizar barked through his teeth. “Why don’t you slither back to Summer and roast in the sun.”
“Why would I roast myself when you do it so well?”
Setizar was speechless.
“One for me.” Aurel looked at Cerie standing in the corner, her hooves crossed. “What does that make now?”
She shook her head. “I don’t keep count like you do.”
“Then start. I have one, Setizar has zero.”
36
The way my heels clicked against the floors sounded like shards of glass clattering against marble. The little stars were nowhere to be seen, and my nerves writhed along my skin. “So, are you going to tell me everything?”
“No. But I do wish to regain our friendship,” Setizar said in a voice coated with smoke and honey. “We’ve made too many strides… bonded too much to fall back to what we were when you first arrived.”
“You’re forgetting,” I ran my hands through my hair, loosening my braid, “I’m still your prisoner.”
“You’re not a prisoner, Meris. You have no chains, and you do not serve me. But you’re safer in my home. Here you need not fear the world. Yamira is dangerous—”
“So is my world!” I clenched my fists, wind peeling through the dark hallway. “The danger there may not be a hungry beast in the woods every twenty seconds, but the people are just as dangerous. They make you feel safe and then tear you apart. They make you wish they were a creature that peeled your skin off your bones.” I shook my head. “You don’t know.”
Silence rippled through the space forming between us. A mortal wound festering. If it were bleeding, I would feel better. But it wasn’t. It leaked from somewhere in my soul, killing me slowly.
“No, I don’t know.” Setizar stood inches away. “And I don’t expect you to ever tell me. I am still a stranger to you.” His voice dripped with an emotion I couldn’t quite place. “Remember I’m doing this for everyone. You can’t go home unless we figure this out, together.”
He didn’t know Tatum told me everything I needed to escape this world. The full moon was the night of the ball.
“Let’s try this again, then?” Setizar dipped his head, smiling. “I’m Setizar, welcome to my home. You’re my honored guest, and you’ll be treated as such.”
I couldn’t help the smile. He had that power lately… to make me smile even when I was angry at him. “You’re the absolute worst jinni I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting.”
“The worst jinni you’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting…” His chuckle was sultry and winsome, holding innocence and guile all at once. “Let’s hope I can hold that title then. I don’t wish for anyone to best me.”
I nodded. “I will admit…” It hurt to say. “I overreacted a bit. There was no reason to lash out like that with you when you really are trying to help.” Why did I feel like an emotional wreck?
“No. Don’t apologize. I have been a tad overbearing. I’m sorry.”
I smiled, allowing myself to take his arm. “Forgiven.” We began to walk down the halls.
“Want to go somewhere with me?”
“Where?”
He smiled, a lilting mystical thing spreading between us and tightening around my heart. “A secret.”
–– ☾ ––
The doors opened and the solarium’s peculiar magic washed over me. “Here?” I asked, testing the limits of the room. “Why did you bring me here?”
“Because it’s a very special place to me.” He shrugged off his coat and it turned to mist and starlight. “I’m sure you’ve come in here before.”
I nodded, allowing myself to explore the solarium more. My fingers grazed the soft leaves of the glowing willows. “I have. It was an…experience.”
“Why do you say that?”
“I went for a swim right in the middle of the magical pool.”
I expected a laugh, a mocking comment, or ridicule. Instead, he simply said, “Then let’s jump into the water.”
I laughed, looking around the trunk of the glowing willow. Setizar leaned against the tree, looking at me as if I was the only thing in this world. “You’re mad.”
That grin returned as he twined his fingers with my own. The touch sent shivers down my spine. “I can’t help that, Meris,” he whispered. “Madness is my sanity.”
I rolled my shoulders. If I jumped from a balcony, I could jump into a magical pool. “Fine. But I need proper swim clothes if you expect me to do this.”
He laughed, shaking his head. “Why worry? Why not just… jump?”
“I’m in a dress!”
“You’ll look like a mermaid.”
I glared.
“An angry mermaid.”
I slapped his arm, unable to withhold my smirk. “Fine. I’ll beat you into the water.”
Before I could move, he caught my hand. Mist and air exploded around me, as did Setizar’s mischievous laugh. We dropped a few feet, and the water rushed over my body.
“Jerk!” I shouted, regaining my bearings.
Water slicked his dark hair to his face, framing gleaming amethyst and emerald eyes. “I believe we tied. Both hit the water at the same time.”
“You cheated.” I laughed, leaning my head into the water. Prismatic ripples swirled around my arms and fingers, licking my skin with forgotten memories of carnival treats and red roses. “I shouldn’t trust you.”
“Why would I cheat to tie?”
A laugh bubbled out of my mouth, uninhibited by anything. “You’d prefer tying rather than losing, I believe.” I lifted my head again, catching him staring. “What?”
“I was just thinking…” He swam nearer, so close I could almost touch him. “You really do look like an angry mermaid.”
I splashed the water toward him, laughing as he turned. His face scrunched up as he failed to avoid the projectile droplets. “You really wish to play dirty?”
“No, but your face was priceless,” I said as I struggled to stay afloat.
He laughed, looping his arm around my waist. His eyes were limned with starlight, emanating pure rays of memory and life. “Tell me something, Meris?” he whispered, pulling me closer. “Tell me this isn’t going to end in disaster. Tell me this will work out and that it isn’t pointless. I don’t care if it’s a lie. I don’t care if you don’t mean a single word. Just tell me that we will fix what’s been broken.” His voice simmered with pain as tears rolled down his cheeks.
And, despite the happiness and peace I felt then, tears were falling down mine.
The magic of the pool. The happiness which breaks your heart.
I pressed my forehead against his, our tears reflecting the light of the glowing willows. “We will win, Setizar.” My heart shuddered, cracking against my bones. This was the second time I’ve been this vulnerable around him. “This isn’t pointless.” It took everything in me to add, “We aren’t pointless.”
His eyes locked with mine, gleaming with tears and magic. They were the blue of sorrow, and the gold of promise. His copper-hued skin, wet from the water, was contoured by shadows and turquoise light.
“Tell me something, Setizar?” I closed my eyes, gripping tighter to his neck as I pressed my forehead harder against his. “Please tell me you didn’t make a mistake. Tell me I’m not a gamble, or a random roll of the dice. That I won’t break my own heart?”
Something warm pressed against my cheek; the fluttering softness of a kiss that set my body alight. “You aren’t a mistake, Meris. This isn’t a gamble. You’re much, much more than a random roll of the dice.” I opened my eyes. His brows were furrowed, and his voice dripped with sincerity. “And I’m not lying when I say it. I believe every word. You were born to do great things. You were born to free the universe and tame the fiery mountains.”
I breathed in. He smelled of autumn and spices, the scent of a creature who could break my heart and walk away without a hint of regret. But I would let him. If he chose to take my heart and toss it into a fire, I would let him.
I would let him make promises and break them.
I would return to him; love him even if he loved someone else. I would do that, from afar if needed. Because, here in this pool, I realized it. I realized how much I belonged to him, how much my heart yearned to be tangled with his.
Our breath mingled together, twining in the air and tangling like the threads of fated yarn. Our lips were inches away, a small tilt of our heads could bring them crashing together. Temptation gripped me around the throat. I wanted to fall into him and devour the warmth he ignited within me.
“We should get out.” I pressed against his chest, pushing myself away from him and gripping the ledge.
The tears didn’t stop. They continued to drip slowly, assuredly, down into the water.
But this time, it wasn’t prompted by the magic of the room.Because these tears are coiled with the pain in my heart, the ache in my chest.
I loved Setizar.
37
The rain dripped down my bedroom window pane like small beings conjured from dreams. My breath fogged the glass, blurring my view, mirroring my hazy memories.
“Come on!” A female voice, so similar to my own, said. It was ghostly, like the memory of a voice. “Hurry, Setizar, or you’ll miss it!”
“Darling, what am I going to miss? You haven’t filled me in yet.”
The female’s laugh was all I heard, and Setizar was all I saw. He was so happy, so at ease. There was a smile on his face, and a glimmer of love in his eyes.
This was frustrating. I was seeing things that weren’t even real. This place was messing with me. I needed to leave before I didn’t know what was up and what was down. A shadowy veil draped over my emotions and reality.
Could I leave Setizar, though?
“I’m so confused!” I dropped to my knees, pressing my back against the mute-gray wall. “I don’t understand.”
Rogue hands wrapped around my waist, jarring me. I opened my eyes, but no one was there. Aether. What was happening to me?
Just a few more days, I reminded myself. Just a few more days.
Just a few more days.
I pushed off the floor, my back burning. Why couldn’t I make heads or tails of this whole situation? My room was coated in a dull blue light, like a clouded winter sky.
Three taps at my door jarred me once more. “Yes?”
Aurel’s head popped into the room. His smile glittered like diamonds, washing the chamber in warmth. He was a summer day entering a chilly autumn evening, dispersing the cinnamon aroma with the scent of sea breeze and sun.
“Meris. How’re you doing?” He shoved his hands into his pockets, his expression turning from jovial to concerned.
“I’m fine.”
His eyes narrowed. “You say that, but you don’t mean it.”
I crossed my arms. “And you think you know what I do and don’t mean?”
“I’m just concerned for you—”
“Why?” I felt myself unraveling. “Why are you concerned? We only spoke briefly. We spent barely enough time to become acquainted. Why would you be concerned about a stranger?”
The muscles in his jaw feathered, his eyes solidifying into a terrifying shade of iron-gray. “At least one thing remains the same.”
His words tore my anger in two, leaving only a bleeding mess of confusion. “What?”
Aurel turned away from me. In the low light of the room, I could see his tense muscles. He was… retreating.
“Aurel—”
“Rest, Meris.” He turned his head and smiled at me. It was so…familiar. As if this very scene had played in my mind before. Before I could question it further, the door clicked closed, and I was alone.
–– ☾ ––
One more day and I’d be attending a ball.
“Meris,” Setizar said. I forgot he was here. He was leaning casually against the windowsill, looking out into the rainy autumn evening. I’d not seen him that casual—as if he had prepared to go to bed and changed his mind last minute and slipped on a velvety green dressing robe. “You’ve been awful quiet. Something amiss?”
Should I tell him of all the odd things happening? The strange feeling I get when I’m near him—as if I’ve known him all my life and yet he’s a complete stranger? “No.” I released a sigh laden with my suppressed feelings. “I’m just tired.”
A slither of emotion crept over his features but vanished just as quick as it came. He nodded. “I’ll ask Cerie to help you to bed tonight. After everything, I’m sure you could use the company of another female.”
I tried not to laugh. He had an interesting way of speaking and communicating. “Alright, thank you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
A subtle smirk lifted his lips. What was he thinking? What was running though his mind to make him smile like that?
A shrill cold fluttered over my spine, wrapping around my body like a frozen blanket before a fluttering warmth spread through my veins. “Setizar.” I breathed in, trying to find a smidgen of courage. “I think something was wrong with Aurel today.”
“Something is always wrong with Aurel, actually he is wrong. He’s been wrong ever since—” He stopped himself, as if processing what I said. “What happened?”
“He came in my room.”
“He what?” Setizar’s eyes shivered a hue darker. “If he—”
“Aurel just wanted to check on me!” I couldn’t let him keep talking. I needed to make sure he knew what happened. “But it was strange. Like we both knew more than we were saying to one another, but neither of us were actually saying it. It’s like he knows me better than he’s letting on.”
Setizar leaned back against the wall, his body relaxing. “Why do you think that?”
“I don’t know.” My fingers trembled. My wings wanted to pop back out. Maybe I was just overthinking.
Setizar pushed himself off the wall, shoving his hands into the deep pockets on either side of his robe. His slippered feet shuffled against the marble floors as he mumbled something under his breath. The silence that took over the room was agonizing. “Well, perhaps a good night’s sleep will do you good.”
I nodded, looking out into the hall. “Alright.” I took a few steps, catching sight of Cerie outside the sitting room. Her sun-bright eyes smiled as she extended her hand to me.
I took it, and we began our walk.
“He seems concerned,” Cerie said, her voice trailing off. “Did something happen?”
I released a breath, shrugging. “I’m not sure.” Everything was so foggy, so uncertain. I came into this world wanting one thing and one thing alone. Now I didn’t know what I really wanted…
38
My wings tore through my shirt and woke me with a start.
Great.
I struggled, sitting up and trying to readjust myself. Every bone burned. My back was a series of stressed knots. Why did everything hurt so much?
Sighing, I shucked off my torn shirt and the rest of my clothes, readying to climb into the tub and wash the ache of my joints away.
“Morning, Meris—”
Seeing Setizar standing by the door, I screeched. “Get out of my room!”
“My house.”
My wings curled around me, covering whatever skin I could. “Excuse me for wanting privacy!”
Setizar chuckled.
What a menace.
“Well, I came here to tell you breakfast is ready.”
“You could have knocked.”
“Like you are ever doing anything remotely interesting.” He snapped his fingers, and a new outfit appeared on the foot of the bed. “An early birthday present.”
I glared.
He raised his hands, backing up. “Fine, fine. I’m leaving. Will I see you at breakfast?”
“Yes.”
A bright smile erupted on his face. It wasn’t like Aurel’s smile, warm and scorching like a summer afternoon, but gentle and calm, sparking joy in my heart like an autumn morning. “Thank you.” Then he was gone, encased in a purple mist.
I exhaled a long breath and grabbing the clothes he put down. It was similar to the first outfit I wore when I arrived, but different. Slimming and beautiful, yet somehow it showed a bit less skin.
Two, long sheer pleats of red fabric fell from the waist, nearly kissing the floor. Under the skirt the trousers, skin-tight and black, shimmered with diamond dust.
I pulled on my shirt. The back was open for my wings. The sleeves were similar the sheets of sheer fabric on my pants, sewn into the black tunic. The outfit was stunning. I quickly combed through my hair, braiding it off to the side.
Finally, I slid into the black slippers, brushed my teeth, and began my trek to the dining hall. Why was Setizar seemingly so excited about me joining him for breakfast?
