Shadow, page 7
“You have no idea what will happen when King knows you’ve seen my wife.”
I wave his statement away. “I know, I know. He’ll kill me, scatter my ashes to the four winds, and hold a celebration. Find your son.”
For the first time I see something besides resentment in Boot’s eyes. “Wait for me in my room,” he tells his wife.
She gives me an assessing glance with maybe a touch of guilt before she turns from the doorway and heads down the hallway.
“Follow me back to your room,” Boot commands.
He leads and I keep my mouth shut until he drops me with my babysitters, who are holding up the wall by my door. “Good luck,” I tell him. I close said door behind me and collapse onto the bed spread eagle on my back. Who would think standing on a ball would be this exhausting? I stare at the ceiling wondering about the Cuban woman. She was young, somewhere in her mid-twenties. She appeared more distraught about her son than my impending death or her husband’s. As it should be. She’ll get over the guilt of my death quickly if they manage to find her son alive. We don’t need more dead children.
I should be worried. I should be cowering in fear trying to find some place to hide. It’s so strange that my fear is all but gone. It could possibly be that I’m on an island with a group of men who helped save us. I just don’t think it’s the only reason. Maybe I’m facing death like a true military leader. It will be my only heroic act but that’s okay. Death will also keep me from standing on that ball again.
Somewhere in my thoughts of impending doom, I fall asleep.
***
The loud knock at the door wakes me much as it did this morning. No one enters this time, so I roll off the bed and throw open the door. “We need to get back to your training,” Boot says.
I glance at the guard before following Boot down the long corridor. He gives me a “keep your mouth shut” look. I’m not stupid. The guards will hear if I ask about his son and I figure I’m not to know he has a son either. We remain silent while we navigate the endless hallways and find our way to the training room.
“Your son?” I ask as soon as the door closes behind us.
“Fell asleep in the barn under some hay. He’s fine. The kid has no fear and endless curiosity.”
Relief swamps me. “Thank God.”
“Thank you for letting me look for him. My wife doesn’t understand what’s at stake. She’s also pregnant and her hormones are causing all kinds of problems.”
I guess a missing son breaks the ice. “Congratulations on the new baby. I’ve heard all about hormone problems when pregnant but never experienced it.”
“When you mate with one of our kind, they’re even worse. Her body is adjusting to the baby’s rapid growth.”
No, he shouldn’t be telling me this. I also have no plans to tell the Federation. They’ll start some diabolical child-making factory if I do.
“Your secret’s safe with me, promise.” The hard frown I receive for that statement shows exactly how Boot feels about it.
“We’ve heard those promises before.”
“Not from me.” I receive the required grunt. Boot walks toward the ball. “Please no,” I beg.
“You stayed on the ball when you weren’t thinking about your balance. I know how we can make this easier.” I follow him and use his shoulder and the wall again. “Tell me about your family,” he says as soon as I’m up.
“They’re dead,” I reply.
“Most humans are. Tell me about them when they were alive.”
This is mentally hard on me, but something is working because I’m no longer wobbling. “My mom was amazing. Her name was Dinah. My name rhymes with hers,” I add with a quick smile. “I take after her in height if not finesse. She would stand on this ball rock solid.”
“Talking helps you with balance.”
“She was in the military. It’s where she met my dad.”
“She was a warrior?”
I take a deep breath. “No, not really. She would have died for her country or for her family, but she had a gentle soul. The military was a way for her to get out of her home environment. She never talked about why.”
“Could she fight?”
I shrug and my feet shake a little. I regain my balance before replying. “I never really saw the fighting side of her. She had a mouth, though, and with her size no one challenged her. I had a teacher once who received the cutting edge of her temper. The teacher walked around me on eggshells after their confrontation.”
“Go to one foot.”
I do it without thinking. No one has asked me about my mom in years. It’s an unwritten rule in the department I work for that we rarely mention the dead. There are too many, and we all lost pretty much everyone. It’s actually nice to talk about her right now. “She loved books and collected them. She wanted to be a writer some day and I knew she would entertain the world with her stories.”
“Switch feet.”
“I can’t believe I’m doing this.”
“You worry about your height too much.”
“It’s driven me crazy my entire life. I was always tall for my age but the year I turned ten, I grew several inches. My dad took me trick or treating on Halloween and the adults answering the doors told me I was too old to be out with the children. I never went again. It sounds silly now, but I still believed in Santa back then and with their cruelty they took Halloween away from me at such a young age.” I shrug and wobble a little more. “People are mean and if we had Halloween now, I would allow costumed adults to come to my door for candy if they wanted to.”
I look down at my feet and lose my balance. Boot’s hand steadies me. “You know you’re not such a bad guy after all. Putting me in that hot room was not very nice of you, though.”
I see the first sign of guilt. “I’m sorry. My wife needed to lay down and I was entertaining Che.” He shrugs and his ears turn pink. “I forgot about you.”
I’ve never been one to hold grudges. “That’s okay. I’m forgettable or at least try to be.”
His expression changes. “Why?”
The million-dollar question. “I’m only alive because of my father. He made sure I had a job that would keep me off the front lines. He knew I wouldn’t survive. King’s insistence that I train is really stupid.”
His mouth twists into the unfriendly expression I’m familiar with. “King knows what he’s doing.”
It’s my turn to grunt. “It will feel good to prove him wrong.”
“King is never wrong.”
Now I laugh. “He has you brainwashed. The man is only a man.”
“And Beast, never forget that. King has control, but when angered, he has no problem losing it.”
I find my balance again. “Is ‘beast’ the politically correct way to talk about your other side?”
He shakes his head slightly. “You mean our monster side?”
“You said it not me.” I lift my leg and stand on one foot without being told. This time I don’t look down.
“Your government said it.”
He isn’t wrong. “They did. Some believe it and some, like my father, did not. He respected you.”
“Yes, your father was a good human.” I see something else in his eyes, though I can’t decipher it.
“Did you know him?” I switch legs all on my own and don’t even use the wall to do it.
“I met him and shook his hand once. I only knew that he wasn’t afraid of us and he didn’t resent us. Your father dealt mostly with Greystone.”
Greystone and my father were friends. “He spoke highly of Greystone.”
“King’s a better leader, but never tell him I said that. Greystone had more resentment for humans than King does.”
That made no sense. Greystone dealt well with my father and King hates us. “If you say so,” I answer doubtfully.
“You ready to move on?” He waves to the floor.
“You mean get off the ball?” I ask hoping I understand correctly.
“You need to build muscle. The ball is the best way to do it.”
“Haha, you’re too funny.” He walks away and picks up two hand weights. They appear to be about five pounds.
“Keep both feet on the ball until you find your balance.”
I do as he asks, but I fall when he hands me the first weight. At least he’s catching me now. “This won’t work,” I tell him sincerely.
“Tell me about your father.”
We talk for another hour with me pumping weights up and down while balancing. If this even has a chance of working, I’ll be the mouthiest warrior anyone has ever heard.
Chapter Twelve
King
HUMANS RARELY TRIGGER my curiosity. Today is the exception, and I’ve had an internal war all afternoon with Beast. He doesn’t like Marinah, while my human side is intrigued. Being away from her has given me a chance to think about these strange, for lack of a better word, feelings. From Marinah’s scent to her tall, lithe body, she draws my focus while inciting Beast’s ire. I’m aware of her in a way no other woman holds my attention. She ignites something inside me and when near, I feel her on a different level than others. My biggest concern is the reason. The entire situation makes no sense.
The plan was to have an unobtrusive woman who would pontificate on behalf of the U.S. Federation while we grumbled and delayed. What we received is the daughter of a man I respect, and as soon as she fell at my feet outside the airplane, I knew nothing would go according to plan. And it hasn’t.
Beck and I arrive back at the Citadel, thus named by one of the men while we prepared for our human visitor and moved our headquarters here for now. I leave Beck and head straight for the small training room that I told Boot to use. I expected many things but not what I find.
Before I even entered the room, Beast shoves K-5 into my system at the sound of Boot and Marinah’s laughter. They’re sitting close against the wall, their postures that of friends having a good time and not the disgruntled pair I forced to train together. Beast’s energy flows through my veins, challenging me on all levels. It’s a painful internal battle that I’ve never had to fight quite like this. Beast directs two thoughts through my head… kill the man… kill the woman.
Boot’s focus is on Marinah, but Beast’s angry energy quickly fills the room and Boot looks to the door. He may not understand what’s happening, but he senses the danger and Beast’s rage. He slowly gains his feet, keeping his eyes down and his posture submissive, placing himself between me and Marinah. Does he really think he can save her if Beast charges?
“Out,” I hiss with as much restraint as I can manage.
Boot glances at Marinah, which only pisses off Beast more. Boot’s sharp eyes snap from her to me. Fear dances in their depths. Beast sees prey that he will gladly tear apart and sends a rumbling growl from deep in my chest to my throat that comes out as more of a roar.
Boot flees.
I’m remaining in human form, but it’s Beast’s eyes that take in the woman: black training pants, T-shirt, aggressive demeanor, arms not raised to defend, easy to kill. I blink and clench my jaws because the chemicals rocketing through my body are giving Beast the lead and I won’t allow it. Blood pulses through my veins, the air around me warms and I push back against the point of no return refusing to allow Beast to win this battle.
“That was rude,” Marinah says having no idea how close she is to death.
I manage to draw in a deep breath and expel it slowly, pushing the K-5 down and doing everything I can to calm Beast. Why does he have such strong reactions to Marinah? For a mate this would be normal, but Beast wants her dead, including everyone around her apparently, and that is decidedly not normal.
Once Greystone convinced me to accept Beast as a true part of myself, I gained the upper hand. I listen to his instincts, which are better than my human side can decipher under most circumstances and it’s kept me alive against the odds. Beast is always more in tune with our surroundings. Yes, Beast and I are one and the same, but he leads the animal side while I handle the human and control us both. Keeping them separate in my head helps, which is one of the most valuable lessons my uncle taught me.
“Only allow your beast to rule when you need a body count. At all other times keep a close reign on him,” he would lecture when Beast inadvertently slipped into my consciousness and I did something destructive.
Now I’m dealing with a human who tests my control of Beast at every turn. I should just kill her. Beast knows something I’m unaware of and this is no time to stop listening to him. The Shadow Warriors understand what we face when fighting the hellhounds and we know it will take working with humans to stop our own annihilation. I cannot kill her.
“I guess you just plan on being rude…” she says but her voice trails off, her expression changing, and I can only guess it’s because of something she sees when looking at me. As a human, she wouldn’t be able to detect the energy in the room, though she might feel the rise in temperature if she paid close attention.
“Stay where you are,” I tell her as she takes a small step back. Another growl releases from Beast. The internal battle is causing physical pain, and Beast shreds my insides refusing to back down. My vision goes red around the edges. Marinah Church is a threat, and Beast knows she needs to be eliminated.
“King,” Beck says from behind me. His tone in that one word means he understands I’m at a crossroads.
“I’ve got this,” I assure him through clenched teeth even though I’m not sure I do.
“Marinah, step around him slowly. No sudden movements.”
“No,” I growl and almost lose myself to Beast’s violence.
Marinah freezes before she can step in his direction. It’s all that saves her. Beast bellows inside me and bones crack. Rage floods my system along with more Kedorine 5. I’ve never brought Beast back from this point of transformation, but I know I must. The pain almost takes me to my knees. The red band around my vision increases in size until there’s only a small clear place left and it holds Marinah. Thick energy pushes against my bones exerting Beast’s will over my own. No, I almost shout out loud. I hold my ground and mentally force Beast back. More bones crack, the pain excruciating. “No.” My shout fills the room this time.
“What’s happening?” Marinah asks.
“Don’t move at all,” Beck tells her.
Pain explodes at their voices and Beast gains another inch of my control. With unwavering concentration, I force my bones to reknit, the K-5 to recede, and my eyesight to readjust. Minute by minute the pain lessens and my human side gains ground. Beast gives a last internal grumble and pulls back. My teenage struggles with Beast were never this difficult.
After what seems like an eternity, I’m able to draw oxygen into my lungs and think clearly.
“See her back to her room,” I grind out as soon as I can speak with some semblance of control.
Beck hurriedly steps out of my path as I head for the door. I don’t look back, needing to place as much distance between myself and the woman as possible. Why the hell does she challenge Beast? Something about Marinah is dangerous and the animal knows it.
I head to the larger gym used by the men. I’m not there to exercise, I’m there to destroy. Two warriors are working out and they flee as quickly as Boot did. I grab five-hundred pounds of barbells and heft them across the room. The stand they rested on is next, followed by the treadmill. When I’ve tossed everything I can find, I attack the barbell bar again and bend it almost in half. I have no idea how long my rampage lasts, but it’s Beck’s voice that finally brings my sanity back.
“You’re losing control, King. Maybe you need a break.”
“Screw you,” I say between gasps for breath. Exhausted, I walk to the wall, turn, and slide down until I land on my butt. I rub the scar on my cheek while melatonin floods my brain in reaction to more K-5 subsiding. Within a few minutes, I can evenly draw air into my lungs and human, post-shift laziness takes over. Finally, something easy to fight. I don’t have time for sleep right now.
Beck steps slowly in my direction. “How bad is it?” he asks. What he means is should he call Axel. When teens or newly mated warriors have trouble, they can’t readily handle, we have a drug that knocks them out. Axel is the only one with access to our supply and he and I are the only two who know its chemical makeup, though we have the ingredient list hidden safely away in case something happened to both of us. The drug knocks us out for hours. The problem is it doesn’t help in the long run. We must each learn to control our beast. The lessons from our ancestors are not easily forgotten. We fought on the home planet until we wiped out most of our population, which was in the millions. Only a long journey for the lucky few saved our kind and in turn we learned to control ourselves. Mostly.
“You need to return her to her people.”
I raise my hand because just his words give Beast permission to grumble inside me. “She can’t go back,” I say evenly. “There’s something wrong with her and Beast knows it. What vibes do you get when she’s around?” I ask because Beck is grumpy, but he has excellent control of his monster, and when he stops grumbling long enough, his council is usually the best.
Beck stares across the room. “Fear usually, but just now anger minus the fear.” He takes a seat on the floor beside me so Beast won’t feel threatened. We’ve done this hundreds of times with the younger warriors.
I place my legs in front of me, bending my knees slightly, willing myself to stay calm. “Something isn’t right. We need time to discover what is going on. Beast wants her dead. It wouldn’t be as strange if it stopped there. He acts jealous when anyone else is around her and he in turn wants that person dead. It’s not mating, but I don’t know what the hell it is.”
Beck breathes steadily allowing me to match my breaths to his as we slow our heartrates even more. “Has this happened before?” he asks after a few minutes.
“No and it shouldn’t be happening now.”
“Then kill her.”
