Just Calamarried, page 3
“Excluding present company, gods don’t usually make a habit of possessing the dead,” Merrick said dryly.
Sloane wandered out of the bathroom into the master bedroom. He was drawn to one of the crowded bookshelves. The books here were older and thicker than the ones he’d glimpsed downstairs, and Sloane recognized them as Sagittarian grimoires.
These would have been a family’s collection of spells and rituals, and it made Sloane’s heart ache to see so many abandoned. After all, if they were here in this guy’s bedroom, he could only assume the families who had once kept them had died or lost their faith.
Before he even knew it was happening, Sloane was crying.
“My sweet mate?” Loch was alarmed and beside him in an instant, hugging him close. “What is wrong?”
“All these books… the families that owned them… they’re all dead.” Sloane sniffled. “Like my parents. My grandparents. My whole family. They are all gone.”
Loch cradled Sloane against his chest. “I’m so sorry, my love. I didn’t know this would upset you.”
“I didn’t know either!” Sloane rubbed at his face and tried to will the tears to stop. The sudden surge of emotions was overwhelming, and he was nauseated again. “Ugh. What is wrong with me?”
“Baby blues?” Chase asked kindly. “When my sister-in-law was pregnant, anything and fuckin’ everything made her cry. Hormones are a bitch.”
“I assume you’ve called for your mother?” Merrick frowned at Loch.
“I spoke to Galgareth.” Loch rubbed Sloane’s back. “She should be waking Mother soon.”
“Sorry, guys.” Sloane hurriedly wiped away his tears. The wave of sadness subsided, and he was embarrassed now. “I didn’t mean for all of that to spill out.”
“It’s all right, my sweet Starkiller,” Loch soothed.
“Thank you.” Sloane gently pushed Loch away and took a deep breath. “Okay. Lemme think. Protection wards weren’t broken, which means no one forced their way in here. Doors were locked from the inside and there was no one else here, which means no one got out, so Ziol was alone.”
“Quite a feat to get murdered by yourself,” Loch mused.
“Portals are still a possibility,” Sloane suggested. “Jeff the crazy Salgumel cultist can teleport, and that wouldn’t have broken these wards.”
“It’s been hours,” Chase said. “If anybody ported in or out of here, there wouldn’t be any fuckin’ trace left by now. No way to tell.”
“Was there any sign of godly goo at the deacon’s house?” Sloane asked.
“Nope. His back door was busted, wards broken, and he was strangled with some kind of magical piece of rope. Couldn’t find it.”
“Damn. Two killers.”
“Two?” Loch frowned.
“There’s two completely different murder weapons, one magical and one not, and two different methods of entry, one that broke wards and one that didn’t,” Sloane explained. “What’s really weird is whoever used a magical murder weapon didn’t use magic to sneak in, but the magic-type entry used a gun. This means there could be two killers.”
“Ah. I knew that. I was merely testing you.”
“Now you see why we called you.” Chase held up his hands. “Even without the godly goo, it’s real fuckin’ weird.”
“Very.” Sloane looked over the books, and he felt his eyes well up again. “Ah, so, what are you thinking? Nathaniel Ware came here, found Ziol dead, and he killed the deacon?”
“It’s thin, but we do got him on camera leaving the deacon’s place. Definitely interested in asking some very murder-themed questions.”
“We’ll let you know what the sister says. Maybe she has some ideas where he might be.”
“Keep your eyeballs out for more goo,” Chase cautioned. “I mean, Loch kinda has a point. It is weird she waited this long to call you if she really thought her brother was missing.”
Loch beamed.
“Yeah. Let me check it out real quick.” Sloane headed back toward the bathroom. “You said there was some over here, right?”
“Yes,” Merrick replied. “On the knob.”
Sloane walked over to the bathroom door and held up his hands for a perception spell.
There on the knob was the prismatic glimmer of something immortal. It shimmered like no other substance Sloane had ever seen, but it seemed… broken.
“Huh.”
“The fractures,” Merrick said knowingly. “Unusual, are they not?”
“Yeah. It’s like looking at a crystal. There’s all these different facets to it.” Sloane scratched the back of his neck. “It’s not as bright as the others I’ve seen either. It’s sort of muted.”
“What are you thinking?”
“I don’t know. Something about it is just off. I can’t figure it out.” Sloane grinned sheepishly. “Maybe it’s pregnancy brain.”
“It looks like that dreaded little Asra’s aura,” Loch sneered. “Ugh.”
“That’s what it is!” Sloane gasped. “It looks like Asta!”
“Asta the Asra, the prince of Xenon?” Merrick frowned.
“Well, not exactly him, but the way it’s sort of faded reminds me of him. Godly auras like what you and Loch have are super bright, and this one is like Asta’s. Like the color got turned down a bit.”
“Like a bad filter?” Chase suggested.
“Yeah,” Sloane confirmed. “I don’t know what the weird little fractures are, though. Maybe it’s not a god at all, but some other member of the everlasting races, like a Vulgora or something.”
“Explain for the class, please.” Chase raised his hand. “Are those the fish guys or the kitty-cat monsters?”
“The Vulgora are an aquatic race of serpentine fish-worms,” Merrick replied. “The Asra were the first of the everlasting races, and yes, they are large feline beasts.”
“So, our mystery goo might be a giant kitty cat?”
“Possible, but doubtful. All of the everlasting people either perished or fled to Xenon, where the Asra have ruled for thousands of years. They have no reason to travel here, and there should not be any left here in Aeon.”
“Knock-knock!” Milo Evans called out cheerfully from the bedroom door. “Everyone put their tentacles and godly bits away! Innocent mortal eyes coming in!”
“Hey, Milo!” Sloane grinned.
Milo was round and bearded, and he and Sloane had been best friends since college. He was a forensic tech and a new Sage, having converted after Loch revealed his true godly nature to him last year.
“You cannot say things like that,” Merrick scolded. “Someone could hear you, and they may actually believe you.”
“Sorry, your godliness.” Milo bowed his head respectfully and pulled Sloane into a hug. “How’s my favorite daddy-to-be, huh?”
“Emotional and puking.” Sloane sighed. “Not a great combo.”
“Aw yeah, Lynnette watched one of those commercials about saving little baby animals and sobbed for, like, twenty minutes last night.” Milo patted Sloane’s shoulder. “Sorry, dude. You should try ginger for the spewing. Helped Lynn a bunch when we figured out Urilith’s blessing doesn’t cover all sickness vanishing away.”
“Thanks, man.”
“No greeting for me?” Loch crossed his arms. “Your favorite and most important god?”
“Right, sorry, Your Most Holy Tentacle-ness!” Milo made sure to bow extra low. “It’s really good to see you too!” He grinned. “Merrick and Chase get you guys up to speed?”
“Yeah.” Sloane nodded. “We know as much as you guys do, and I’m just as confused.”
“I’m not.” Loch snorted. “It’s obviously the perp’s sister. She committed these crimes and framed her brother!”
“Huh?” Milo blinked.
“Nathaniel Ware,” Sloane explained. “The guy seen on the security footage leaving the deacon’s house? His sister called me yesterday to ask for help finding him, claimed he’s been missing for two weeks.”
“Which is real funny, ’cause we know he’s been at the tree protests, and no missing person’s report has been filed,” Chase chimed in.
“Weird.” Milo frowned. “Maybe the sister didn’t know what he was up to? Did she try calling the cops?”
“She said she had, and she told me the cops weren’t really doing anything. Which, of course, after talking to Chase and Merrick, is a lie.”
“Did you find anything useful downstairs, Mr. Evans?” Merrick asked sternly.
“Nothing except this guy’s book collection is worth a fortune.” Milo gestured to the cases. “Some of these are the only known copies in existence. Super rare Sagittarian texts, antique grimoires, the works.”
“And none are missing?” Chase whistled. “This has gotta be personal. For someone to figure out how to sneak on in here and not snatch even one book?”
“It is strange,” Merrick agreed.
“Well, shit.” Milo shrugged helplessly. “What now?”
“We’re gonna start tracking down members of Ziol’s coven,” Chase said. “Find out if they’re really Salgumel crazy or not, see if anybody knows somethin’ about Ware.”
“The protests at the Tree of Light are still ongoing.” Merrick cringed. “Once the deaths of Mr. Ziol and the deacon make the news, we must expect the situation there to escalate between the two groups.”
“We’ll go talk to Ware’s sister.” Sloane rubbed his stomach. He was absolutely starving. “Ugh. After I get something to eat.”
“Check back in tonight? Compare notes?” Chase clapped. “Yeah, I think that’s a pretty solid plan.”
“Excellent.” Loch held his head high. “I will feed my husband a nutritious meal, provide him additional relief by mating with him thoroughly, and then I will confront this treacherous sibling.”
“Take care.” Merrick cracked a smile as Sloane blushed. “I wish you both well.”
“Thanks, guys.” Sloane hugged Milo farewell while his face burned. “We’ll see you guys later, okay? Tell Lynette we said hey.”
“Have fun mating!” Chase teased.
“Goodbye, Chase!” Loch waved. “Goodbye, my beloved uncle, Gordoth the Slut!”
Merrick gaped. “Gordoth the what?”
“Bye, guys!” Sloane scrambled to leave the house, not stopping until he and Loch were back in the car. He let out a big sigh of relief, groaning, “Wow.”
“Double homicide, two killers, mysterious goo.” Loch was positively giddy. “A religious feud over a tree? This is very exciting.”
“This is stressful,” Sloane corrected. “I was hoping for a simple missing persons case, but nooo.”
“My sweet husband, we are not obligated to help them.” Loch frowned, and he reached for Sloane’s hand. “If this is going to be too much for you, we need not continue. It can’t be good for you and the baby.”
“That’s very sweet of you, and I want what’s best for our baby too.” Sloane started the car and headed to his office. There were a few fast-food places on the way, and he wanted something disgusting and greasy. “But….”
“But?”
“But when I think about it, I have to help them. This is all my fault.”
“That is ridiculous.”
“When I found my parents dead and called to my gods, it was my prayer that woke up Tollmathan. He woke up Gronoch and who knows who else.” Sloane squeezed Loch’s hand. “All of this shit is because of me, what I did.”
“My sweet mate,” Loch soothed, “you can’t think that way. If it had not been you, my brothers would have woken up by some other means, and their plans to awaken our father and end the world would be the same. You are not the one who put hate in their hearts.”
“Yeah, I’m just the one who pulled them out of the dreaming,” Sloane grumbled. “Even that damn tree. If it really is a Xenish Sprig, I might have brought it here. I could have torn the veil.”
“You cannot hold yourself responsible for others’ actions,” Loch insisted. “You’re no more at fault for me pilfering Chase’s badge—”
“You took it again?”
“—than you are for anything my brothers do. And yes, I took it. It’s shiny, and I like it.”
Sloane laughed. He couldn’t help it. Loch was smiling so earnestly, and the heaviness in his chest eased.
“He’s gonna know it was you,” Sloane warned.
“I’m not giving it back.” Loch kissed Sloane’s hand.
“I love you. Thank you for making me feel better.”
“Do you?”
“What?”
“Feel better?” Loch frowned. “I’m serious about not taking the case if you believe it would put you and our child at risk in any way.”
“I feel like… I feel like this is what I need to do.” Sloane struggled for the right words. “I want to help fix this. I can handle it.”
“If at any moment I feel you or our child are in immediate danger, I will use all of my godly powers to stop you.”
“I wouldn’t expect anything less.”
They went through the drive-through of a burger joint despite Loch’s protests, and Sloane got three double-cheeseburgers and a large vanilla milkshake. He only had part of a burger left by the time they arrived at the office, and he really was feeling better.
He would do what he could to assist with the case, and if it became too overwhelming, he would take a step back. He had a responsibility now as a father to see to his child first.
Mystery goo be damned.
Sloane’s office was a bit cluttered with files from previous cases he needed to tidy, and he lit some incense to help him focus. Loch had stolen this incense bowl from a museum because it had reminded Sloane of one his mother once used.
Sometimes his thieving ways were downright thoughtful.
Once Sloane finished eating, he clapped his hands to sort the paperwork into neat stacks. “Okay, we’ve got some time before Daphne gets here, and I need to put this stuff in the right folders.”
“May I be of assistance?” Loch asked, peering over the papers.
“It’s okay. It’s my notes from the cultists and the paintings Ollie helped us translate.”
“Mmm.” Loch stood behind Sloane, and one of his tentacles crept down the front of Sloane’s shirt.
Sloane saw it was one of the slitted ones, and his breath caught.
Loch had three tentacles for copulation; two slitted ones that gave the most amazing blowjobs and felt great inside of him, and the tentacock, a massive knotted phallus that had no right fitting inside a mere mortal body.
Oh, but when it did, wow.
“What are you doing?”
“Well, I was not able to provide you with a nutritious meal because you elected to eat garbage,” Loch replied. “The least I can do is provide the relief I promised.”
Sloane’s pants magically unzipped, and the slitted tentacle wiggled its way inside.
“B-but I’m working!” Sloane protested. He groaned when the tentacle mouthed around his soft cock, and he quickly hardened.
“Come along, my sweet Starkiller.” Loch kissed Sloane’s neck. “Let me take care of you.”
“Mmm….” Sloane closed his eyes, and he groaned as the tentacle began to suck on the head of his cock.
It had been a very stressful morning, after all.
Maybe just a quick—
The office door suddenly opened, and a young woman with a hooded cloak walked inside. “Hello? Mr. Beaumont? I know I’m early—oh!” She gasped and turned around. “I’m so sorry!”
“Shit!” Sloane jerked and quickly smacked Loch’s tentacle away.
Loch grumbled in annoyance.
Sloane clapped to right his clothes, praying Daphne hadn’t seen what had just slipped out of his pants. “Hi! Miss Ware! I’m so sorry!”
“I, I should have knocked!” Daphne was still turned, and she pulled her hood around her face tighter. “I’m sorry!”
“Mating is perfectly natural,” Loch said. “There is no shame in exploring the body of a loved one—”
“We’re decent now. Please.” Sloane sat at his desk and waved at the chair in front of him. “Have a seat. Tell me how I can help you. Trying to find your brother, right?”
“Right. Yes, I’m Daphne Ware.” She hovered by the chair, hesitating to take it. “You are a Sage, right? You follow the old ways?”
“Yes. My family has been Sagittarian for many generations.” Sloane subtly raised his hand.
Her aura: glowing, prismatic, air, fractured.
As Daphne sat, she swept a large thick tail up into her lap. She dropped her hood, revealing a very normal face—save for the greenish-yellow skin and tusks peeking out between her lips from her lower jaw.
“As you can see, I’m not exactly… human.”
Chapter 3.
“AN ABSOLA,” Loch whispered, “but… not?”
Sloane had seen drawings of the Absola people. They were big troll creatures with large snouts, sharp tusks, and long pointed tails. This young woman still looked very human in most aspects, but the tusks and tail definitely indicated she was something more.
“Yes,” Daphne replied nervously. “I’m part Absola and, well, we think Faedra too. It’s kinda complicated.” She fidgeted. “This is why I wanted to make sure you were actually a Sage and wouldn’t freak out.”
“Uh….” Sloane was tempted to freak out. “Is it okay if I ask you… some questions?”
“Of course.”
“When you say ‘part’ Absola, what do you mean? Are you not from Xenon?”
“Xenon?” Daphne laughed. “No! I’m from Ohio originally. Me and my whole family.”
“Do they….”
“Do they look like me?” She smiled, her big tusks gleaming. “No. Not for a long time, from what I understand. You know the story about the gods all going into the dreaming and what happened to the everlasting people who were left behind?”
“Some went to Xenon, where the Asra rule, and the others—” Sloane glanced sympathetically to a mournful Loch. “—perished on Aeon.”
“But not all of them.” Daphne smiled brightly.
