Fated, page 5
Red’s slightly panicked voice cut through the silence. “Uh, this is probably a bad time to point this out, but the kids appear to have vanished.”
Everyone shouted at once: “What!?”
Lupa, Leveret, and Ashe, who had been huddled in the center of the circle for the group talk, weren’t there anymore.
Everyone freaked, including me. I was so frantic my brain was barely working. I ran towards Xander, about to ask him if he’d seen the kids when—
I skidded to a halt.
Xander—big, proud Xander—was sheepishly pressed up against the tree where we’d left him, looking both meek and affectionate. Sitting around him like a mini gang were the three kids.
“Guys, over here!” I called.
Remington, who was always ready to die fighting for a child’s sake, growled as he ran, “If that cat touched the kids I’m gonna—” Seeing the same scene that I did, he stumbled into me, his eyes wide in surprise. “Oh.”
The pack’s momentary panic dissipated when we saw what happened. The kids had secretly slipped away during our group argument, and curiously approached the exciting new stranger.
“Are you a lion?” Lupa demanded. She was sitting cross-legged in front of him, completely unafraid.
“Yes,” Xander replied.
“But you didn’t have big hair,” Lupa argued. “Are you a girl lion?”
“A mane,” Ashe said, proud that he knew a word she didn’t even though he was younger than her.
“N-no, I’m not a female lion,” Xander said. “I’m a mountain lion. We don’t have manes, in any gender.”
“Ooh! A mounty lion!” Lupa cried.
A smile graced Xander’s lips, lighting up his entire face. It was an expression I’d never seen on him before and it made my heart melt.
“If that’s too hard for you to say,” Xander went on, “you can also say cougar, or puma. They’re all the same thing.”
“Cougaw,” Leveret said, trying out the word.
Ashe and Lupa giggled. “Poo-ma.” After saying it, they giggled even harder.
“Maybe lion is the easiest,” Xander conceded, still smiling.
I could have stood there and watched them for an eternity. I was seeing a completely different side of Xander, one that didn’t fit his solitary-stoic-bad-boy image at all. Around kids, he was a total softie. He got called a poo-ma, for gods’ sake. If anyone else had called him that, he probably would’ve bit their head off.
But now, interacting with the kids, his eyes lit up despite the pain. There was a handsome and adorable smile on his face that never faded. He was… so gorgeous.
A twinge inside my ribs made me put a hand over my chest. It felt weird.
My brother’s voice pulled me from my thoughts.
“Well, pack?” Hugo asked with a smile. “What’s our final say about Xander?”
Everyone had seen Xander and the kids now. Xander’s kindness was undeniable. They had to know that now. Hope fluttered inside me.
“Please let him stay,” I blurted out.
Everyone exchanged a glance, one I couldn’t entirely read. I felt like they all knew something I didn’t.
I didn’t know if it was because I begged, or because the pack had seen that Xander was a good guy and the kids loved him, but the vote was unanimous, even from a grudging Remington.
Xander was staying.
6
Xander
Sage bounded over to me with a blinding grin on his face. “Xander, guess what!”
My expression was torn between a smile towards the kids and a frown at Sage. “What?”
“The pack’s letting you stay!”
I didn’t know how to respond to that, since I’d been in a tug-of-war since arriving. It made no difference to me either way. I knew I would survive on my own, albeit with difficulty, but I wasn’t some weakling who needed assistance. On the other hand, it was a relief that I’d have access to food, water and shelter during my recovery. And I had to admit, it was kind of the pack to offer.
But it came with a price—spending more time around Sage.
“Xander’s fun!” Lupa called out.
“Yeah, wanna play with him!” Ashe agreed.
Their respective parents came to scoop them up, ignoring the kids’ protests.
“Xander needs time to rest without little pups and hares bothering him,” Len said with an armful of twins.
“Aww!” they both complained.
Morgan lifted up Ashe and sat him around his shoulders. “You, too, little fawn.”
Watching the omega fathers and their kids made me feel a twinge of jealousy. I felt my smile slipping as they were ushered away for naptime. Unfortunately, I had no time to brood alone. Sage plopped himself down beside me.
“You like kids, huh?” Sage asked.
“Yes,” I grumbled.
“Cool.” He paused. “You got any?”
I turned very slowly to glare at him.
“Okay, sheesh, I’ll take that as a no,” Sage mumbled. He was never quiet for long, though. “Do you want some?”
“Is there a reason you’ve chosen to come and annoy me?”
Sage frowned but made no effort to leave. “I’m just keeping you company.”
“I don’t need it.”
“But do you want it?”
“Why do you keep asking me what I want?” I snapped suddenly. “What I want doesn’t matter.”
Sage wasn’t taken aback by my shouting. He blinked. “Of course it matters. Everyone has wants, right? Including you. I want to know what they are.” He grinned. “See what I did there?”
He was infuriatingly nice. I closed my eyes.
I don’t know what came over me, but I decided to answer him honestly. Maybe it would shut him up.
“Yes,” I said quietly. “I do want kids.” Sage opened his mouth, but I cut him off. “But it’s not in the cards for me.”
Sage scoffed. “What? How can you say something dumb like that?”
I raised a brow at him. “I’m dumb now?”
“No. You’re smart, but what you said is dumb.”
“Enlighten me,” I growled.
“You said it’s not in the cards, but how do you know? Are you a mind-reader? A psychic? Is there some kind of prophecy about you where you never have kids?”
He was being so ridiculous that I didn’t want to humor him with an answer, but as the moments passed, I realized he was seriously waiting for one.
“No,” I admitted, feeling foolish for playing along.
Sage brightened. “Exactly! Then you have no way of knowing. You can change stuff about your life if you don’t like it, y’know.”
A strange feeling took hold of me. I was both hopeful and afraid. Sage’s words were like a drug I desired, but one I couldn’t accept.
So I did the one thing I was good at doing: I lashed out, hoping to push him away.
“Okay,” I sneered, “let me go pick a baby off the baby-tree.”
“There you go, saying dumb things again,” Sage said, unbothered. Then he grinned. “That’d be cool, actually. Instead of dealing with all that annoying pregnancy stuff, just pick a baby off a tree.”
He laughed at the mental image. I didn’t think it was funny, but sitting next to him, his laughter felt contagious. I smiled, just a tiny bit, before smothering it. I didn’t think he saw.
“Have you… ever been pregnant?” I asked.
It was a ridiculous question, spurned on by Sage’s ridiculous aura, and I immediately felt stupid for asking. I already knew the answer. He only just had his first heat the other night. I blushed in utter embarrassment.
But Sage didn’t point it out, if he even noticed my blunder. “Nope!” he said cheerfully. “I’ve only seen Len and Morgan go through it. It looks difficult.” A soft smile lit up his face as he turned to me. “But if you get a baby at the end of it, then it can’t be so bad, right? It’s gotta be worth it.”
Our eyes met. I couldn’t look away. I didn’t want to. The bright, innocent kindness in his face drew me in like a lure, his hair like the glow of the sun. For a moment, he was the sun.
I broke first, forcing myself to look away.
If Sage was the sun, I was a shadow. We were opposites. We couldn’t be together.
And besides that, he was a wolf. I already knew how wolf and mountain lion pairings worked out. They didn’t.
Ugh, why am I even thinking about this like it’s an option?
“Earth to Xander,” Sage said, waving a hand in front of me.
“What?”
“You never answered me.” He smiled, oblivious and upbeat as usual. I didn’t know how people like him existed in the world. How could he be so happy?
Some primal feeling stirred inside me, like my inner mountain lion was prowling restlessly in his den. Maybe it was because I was older than him, or because I was an alpha, or because he was a meek little wolf and I was a powerful big cat—but undeniably, I wanted to protect him. I wanted to protect that ball of sunshine that existed inside of Sage.
But he wasn’t my responsibility. He was a man I’d only just met. I had no obligation to him.
So why did I feel this way?
“Yes, it must be worth it,” I said distantly, finally answering him.
He let out a contented sound. “Yeah, I think so too. Len and Morgan, and Hugo and Dax too, they seem so fulfilled, y’know? Like having kids made them a better version of who they were.” He scratched the back of his neck. “I guess that sounds kinda sappy.”
“Not at all.”
He traced a finger along the grass. “Guess you need a mate first, though. Which is like, a whole other obstacle.” His smile faded slightly. “My brothers were lucky. They knew their fated mates at first glance.”
The mention of that phrase froze me. Fated mates.
“But it’s not real,” I said.
Sage stared at me like I’d said monkeys could fly. “What? Yes, it is.”
I shook my head, too bitter to play along with his naïve ideals this time. “It’s not. Shifters mate, and sometimes they use a fairy tale to justify their relationship. It doesn’t mean anything.”
This genuinely upset Sage. He puffed up and stood with a frown. “No, Xander, you’re wrong. Fated mates are real. And that’s the truth. My brothers both found theirs.”
A wave of anger, resentment and sadness crashed into me. I spat, “Then why haven’t you found yours?”
“Why haven’t you?” he shot back childishly.
“Because it’s not a real thing.”
I thought Sage would get upset at me and leave. That was what I was expecting. Instead, my defiance only seemed to pull him closer. He got right up in my face and said, “What if it is and you’re just too stubborn to see it?”
His proximity brought with it the lingering scent of his heat. It clung to his smooth skin, more fragrant than any flower. I swallowed thickly.
“Please,” I said, trying to sound sarcastic but it failed as my voice hitched embarrassingly. “I have more life experience than you. I’ve seen things you haven’t.”
Sage smirked. “And I’ve seen things you haven’t.”
I growled as that build-up of emotion surged.
“You’re naïve,” I spat.
“You’re jaded.”
We stared off. Sage wouldn’t back down. His eyes blazed up at me with innocent rebellion.
“You’re practically a child,” I hissed. “What do you know?”
It wasn’t even an argument anymore—it was an insult. One I didn’t even believe. But Sage wasn’t put off. His smirk turned into a grin, like he knew he was winning. He bounced up on his toes.
“Actually, I’m twenty-one, so you’re factually wrong as hell.”
He was close to me, unbearably close. With each motion, more of his scent wafted around me, undeniably delicious.
My heart began to race. I didn’t get anxious or nervous. I didn’t experience fear. But I felt all of those now. Sage was doing something to me, some fucking magic I didn’t understand. He was just an omega wolf. I shouldn’t have been so attracted to him—
Upon admitting that to myself, I stopped. This had gone too far. I needed to get away from here. From Sage.
“Ha!” Sage cried, crossing his arms triumphantly. “Nothing to say, Xander? That means I win!”
I noticed something in the corner of my vision. A black-haired young man—Remington—watching us from behind a tree. He didn’t trust me and was probably wary about leaving Sage alone with me, but I didn’t care. It was a boon to me right now.
“Remington,” I called out.
He seemed surprised I noticed him, but my cat eyes were sharp even in human form. “What?” he asked gruffly.
“Is there a water source around here? Somewhere I can wash my wounds?”
Remington looked like he wanted to make a sly remark but sighed and said, “Just past those trees. There’s a stream.”
“Thanks.”
I lumbered off in the direction he’d pointed, ignoring the pain in my side. If it meant getting away from Sage, I could deal with the physical hurt, but I couldn’t take the flurry of emotions anymore. They were impossibly confusing and utterly ridiculous.
“Huh?” Sage piped up as I walked away. “Hey, where’re you going?”
“To wash. Alone.”
He had been following me but now stumbled to a halt, frowning. “Are you sure you’ll be okay by yourself? What if you fall? What if you drown in the stream? What if—”
He stopped talking by himself with a soft gasp, barely audible. I didn’t look back at him to see why he’d cut short. If I looked back, I might have stayed against my better judgment. Better I leave and return when my head was on straight.
I heard soft voices behind me, Sage and Remington, but I couldn’t make out their conversation. I kept on going. A few moments later I heard someone running up beside me.
“I’ll go with you,” Remington said. When he saw my sour expression, he added, “I won’t bother you.”
“You’re here to babysit me, then.”
“I’m here to make sure you don’t pass out from pain and drown in the stream, like Sage said,” Remington retorted.
It sounded less ridiculous coming from Remington. Maybe it was that serious, anger-tinged face of his. He was young, but I could tell he’d been through a lot. Aside from the difference in our years, we had that in common.
I grunted in affirmation. “Fine.”
He nodded, then didn’t say another word. After Sage’s conversational assault, it was a relief. Or at least, that’s how I wanted to feel.
I found the stream and began washing. Remington sat a healthy distance away, indifferent to me.
“Is Sage older than you?” I said.
I didn’t know what compelled me to ask. Maybe it was the silence that felt uncomfortable after Sage’s non-stop talk.
“Yes,” Remington said. “Why?”
A one-note laugh left me. “Nothing.”
“He doesn’t seem like it, right?” Remington offered. “I know. I felt the same way when I met him.” He rolled his eyes. “He’s something.”
As the cool water ran over my fresh wounds, it stung. I held back a hiss. Talking was a good distraction as I worked.
“What is this pack, anyway?” I asked. “A bunch of love-struck couples?”
Remington shot me a slow glance. “Why do you say it like it’s a bad thing?”
I snorted. “Don’t tell me you believe in fated mates, too. Sage wouldn’t shut up about it.”
When Remington went quiet and serious, I knew my suspicion was correct.
“I wouldn’t believe it if I didn’t see it for myself,” Remington said. “Twice. Both Hugo and Len, and Dax and Morgan are perfect together. It’s like they were made for each other.”
He spoke wistfully. It made me wonder if the young omega wanted the same thing. But just like before, the concept sounded more credible when Remington spoke about it.
But it couldn’t be true. It was all too perfect.
“You know,” Remington began, “I’m not your biggest fan, Xander.”
That was no surprise to me. I smirked, appreciating his honesty. He wasn’t a pal of mine either but I was gaining respect for him fast.
He went on. “But Sage is. I know he can be annoying, but would it kill you to be a little nicer to him?”
I paused. The water continued running around my legs and dripping off my skin.
“I can’t,” I muttered.
“Why?”
With a growl, I poured water over my hottest, angriest wound, a deep one in my side. I had to grit my teeth to stop a grunt of pain.
“Because I don’t want him to get attached.”
Remington huffed. “Little late for that, don’t you think?”
“I can’t fake him out again, or the whole pack will have my pelt,” I snapped at Remington. Regretting my outburst, I mumbled, “And it didn’t work anyway. He wasn’t afraid of me.”
“Are you afraid of him?” Remington asked.
The question made me freeze. Were my thoughts so obvious or was Remington just observant?
“Not physically,” I muttered.
“You know that’s not what I meant.”
I felt weak—not because of the wounds ailing me, but because of the cottony emotions stuffing my head. Remington had aimed at my weak point and fired, and now it spilled out into reality. I couldn’t contain it anymore. I punched the water in frustration and it splashed back down.
“He’s doing something to me,” I growled. “And I don’t like it.”
I expected the wolf to laugh at me, but he didn’t. There was a mature look on his young face.
“I guess I should let you know,” Remington said quietly, “a few minutes ago, Sage said he felt another cramp coming on. I don’t know why his first time is so erratic, but it’s Sage after all. I guess it suits him.”
“Why are you telling me this?” I asked.
Remington faced me. “Because his heat is flaring up again.”
The words were like a weight dropped on me. I was too shocked to react.
“We already know you aren’t some creep, so no one’s going to chase you away,” Remington said, “but I just thought you’d want to know.”
