The Ryland Rules, page 7
Once back inside, sure that the ex and his date had left, I searched for Melody. Hoping she was ok. I figured Rylee was probably with her, but I felt a need to see if she was ok myself. There was something about seeing her so torn up about it and the way he talked about her that left me feeling protective. I wasn’t about to question it, but I was going to act on it. After about twenty minutes of searching around the house, I finally stumbled out the back door. Now feeling a bit panicked since I had seen Rylee alone in the house, talking with a few others. She said she didn’t know where Melody was, just that she wanted time alone. But low and behold, there she was, silently sitting on the steps of the back deck, her head in her hands. Her long blonde hair hung all disheveled around her shoulders. I sighed as I shut the door. Raking my fingers through my hair, pushing it off my face, relief flooded me.
“He was a dick, huh?” I joked to make light of it. Kind of an icebreaker of sorts, but she wasn’t all too amused.
Lifting her head, she looked at me from over her shoulder, her eyes swollen and painful looking as she glared at me. “Get lost Ryland. I’m in no mood for your shit.” She spat, her voice cracking. I deserved that. It wasn’t like I was her go to support system, actually I was more of a pest. But she practically asked for it by being my sister’s friend.
Putting up my hands in surrender, I exhaled deeply. “No shit. Just checking on you.”
She rolled her eyes before looking back out to the yard. The glow of the torchlight on the corner of the deck providing the only light we could see. The massive trees that grew in the backyard blocked even the moon and stars out. I wasn’t about to wait for an invitation, so I crossed the porch to where she was sitting and plopped down. The second my ass hit the wooden planks, I realized something. I have never really talked to this girl. I have seen her face in passing for as long as I can remember. Since we were all kids. She was over at our house almost every day, and a few times they had conned me into driving her somewhere, or teaching her something by my dad’s request. But we never talked. She was just there all the time. In the background.
“Seriously Ryland. What do you want?” She groaned, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. “Come to make fun of me? Pull a shitty prank? Whatever it is, just get it over with.” I probably deserve that, too. It was only yesterday I took a window marker to her jeep, drawing an enormous dick on her back plastic. Though I was drunk.
I cringed at her words. “Really Melody? Why do you hate me?”
She turned to look at me, and I felt my chest tighten. Eyes like pools of honey, blurred with tears, looked at me with astonishment. Her softly tanned skin glowing under the torchlight, an alluring contrast to the bright blonde hair that hung in loose curls around her. I swallowed hard, throat becoming strangely dry. She was way too young for me. I knew that. She was my sister’s age. Hell, this was her sixteenth birthday. She was just a girl. But I couldn’t help it. There was something so damn gorgeous about her, and I couldn’t help it as I reached out to touch her. Using the back of my knuckles, I brushed away a tear that had rolled down her high cheekbone.
“Why? Why do you hate me?” I asked her again. More so now than before, I desperately wanted to know. What had I done to her to make her hate me so much? Was it the pranks? My existence?
Brushing my hand away from her face with her own, I felt lightning shooting through my fingers. Causing me to pull it back far more abruptly than warranted. “You’re an asshole. You’re a player. A cheat. Come on? What do you expect us to be? Friends. Sorry but no. I’m not interested in associating myself with that.” She huffed, shaking her head. “I just rid myself of that. Spare me whatever it is you think you’re trying to do. I’m not a number.”
The sharpness of her words hit home. Piercing me right through the heart. I shifted in my seat nervously. Nodding slowly in recognition. “Well,” I cleared my throat awkwardly. “I’m sorry you feel that way.”
She soured further, an angry laugh bubbling out through the tears. “Come on, Ryland. I’ve seen it firsthand almost all my life. Don’t take it personal. How I feel about you doesn’t matter, anyway. Just get whatever you wanted to do done and leave.” And again, the sting of her words hit me hard.
Exhaling hard, I held my breath, my hand now laying right next to hers on the deck. Slowly, I inched my hand over to hers, then sliding it over. Her skin so soft under my own. “I was just going to see if you were ok.” Nervously I rubbed the back of my neck, the tension that was lingering in the space between us becoming suffocating. “And you’re too good for him. You can do a million times better.”
I wasn’t sure what I said, but the way she looked at me as her golden brown eyes returned to mine was awe striking. A softness returned as she searched my face for a clarity my words had not given.
“You think so?” She sniffled.
I nodded once. Lifting my hand from hers, that she surprisingly allowed to stay, I beckoned her closer. With a brief hesitation, she scooted closer, her hip pressed to mine. Her leg and knee pressed to mine as well, as though she fused herself to my side. A peppering of tears returned to her eyes. Without a question, I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and held her close as the dam finally broke.
Soon, a blubbering mess of a list came spewing from her. A haphazardly list of all the things she thought she had failed in her life. Despite being so early into it. The way she sobbed about the way people looked upon her career dreams, to losing all of her friends in school except Rylee. Her father never being there, and now this most recent betrayal. My heart was breaking for her.
Before I knew what I was doing, I had pulled her into my chest. Her arms now wrapped around my torso as she sobbed into my shirt. Pressing my lips to her forehead for only a moment to comfort her, I felt a wave of uncertainty fill me. I swallowed hard. Quickly pulling back to place my chin on the top of her head, my throat felt raw. This was wrong. I should have let go, I should have backed off. But every bit of the woman she was becoming clouded the mind of the man I was. I wanted to stay. Keep her close, pull her closer.
“You deserve so much better than a guy who would cheat on you. You were too good for him. Too good for any guy in this stupid town.” Even me. “You deserve a man who respects you, takes care of you. Challenges you to be the best you can be and supports your dreams. One who realizes you are more than worth the wait, instead of calling you uptight. And one day you will find him. I promise you that.” I closed my eyes, inhaling the sweet smell of orchids coming from her hair. “And remember. Nothing that makes you happy, writing or whatever is a waste of time. Just as long as it makes you happy.”
The memory of that night filled my mind. The guilt and disappointment that I had felt towards myself, all too real. As though it was only yesterday. Now compounded with the guilt from the last time in the cabin, I made my way back to the fridge. Popping open the door, I just stared at the illuminated cans. Glimmering like a poison in the white light, calling to me. It would only take a few of them to wipe these feelings away. But what after? When clarity returned, would it be worth it?
With a huff, I closed the fridge and made my way to the living room where Melody and Rylee were talking. Both of them tucked up on their feet as they chattered. Giggling about whatever gossip they had occupied themselves with. Immediately upon entering, Rylee peaked up to give me a smile, while Melly dropped her eyes to the floor like magnets pulled them. Does she remember those times like I did? Did she hate me more for it? Out of the two of us, I should have known better. I was the adult, the responsible one. Or at least I was supposed to be. A lump caught in my throat. I guess no matter how much time, or how many times I try to get on her level. She still can’t stomach the sight of me.
“Hey Ry. How was the lake? We were going to head down there.” Rylee chirped enthusiastically.
I couldn’t help it. I glued my eyes to Melly and the uncomfortable body language she had. Just as always when I was around. For a moment yesterday, when we were in town, I thought we had bridged the gap. Covered the festering wound that came when she arrived here. But it was clear that it was an off day. I was a means to an end for her, and she tolerated me while she had to. But now we were back in my home, and she was with Rylee. There was no reason to be kind anymore. I felt pathetic, but somehow I grew to adore that as well. After six years, you’d think it would leave my mind. But no, it didn’t. It stayed burned there, aching for more at every turn. It was exhausting.
“Cold.” I shrugged. I mean, that was an obvious answer. It’s a lake in November, it wasn’t exactly the beaches of Miami.
Rylee nodded enthusiastically, nudging Melody with her elbow. “I say we do a repeat of last time. What do you say?”
Both Rylee and I stared at her intently as she gave a sheepish shrug. “Sure.” She muttered, barely loud enough to be heard. If I didn’t know better, I swore that a faint flush had creeped up over her cheeks. Like something embarrassed her. I couldn’t see that anything embarrassing happened, so it must have been something she was thinking of. Damn what I wouldn’t give to get into her mind for even just a moment. To know what she was thinking.
“Ry, why don’t you join us.” Rylee then added, looking back to me, unaware of the tension that flowed through the room. From the way she acted, it left me to believe Melody said nothing to her about the last time we were here. I half expected her to spill the beans and tell my sister all about what a jackass her brother is. Tell her I forced myself on her or was a creep or something. But Rylee just went on as normal. Had Melody told her, I was sure Rylee would be up in my face with threats.
I shrugged again, trying to remain cool. Shoving my hands into the front pockets of my jeans to keep myself from fidgeting, I sighed. “Hard pass. I’m not going anywhere near that cold water again.”
Rylee let out a laugh. “Suit yourself. Come on Melly. Let’s grab our bikinis and take a dip before dinner.”
My eyes widened—my whole body went tense. Even the faintest imaginative thought of Melody in a bikini, triggering a slew of thoughts I knew better than to be having. Picturing her jumping into that icy cold water, only to resurface dripping wet, nipples hard and poking out of the fabric, made my body heat. Swallowing hard, I nodded to them before making a quick exit. Getting as far away from that sight as I could. Lying to her about what she tried to do drunk was one thing. Pretending that I didn’t want that and so much more from her, especially when images of her that way flooded my mind, was definitely another.
Stepping back into the trap that was the kitchen, I still couldn’t get my mind to quiet. I wanted to go down there with them. I wanted to see her hair wet, clinging to her skin, covered in goosebumps. I wanted to see her trembling, nipples hard, lips parted and quivering. Only so I could warm her back up myself—lick and kiss the small areas that the bikini didn’t expose. Right there on the bank, I would gladly touch and kiss and bite until she was feverish, forgetting the cold entirely. Out there where the only ones could hear her were the birds and me. I shook the thought from my head, opened the fridge, thought better of it, then closed it. She was just as bad as the beer now.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Icy
Melody ~
All dressed up, or rather, down in my favorite black bikini with a rose embroidered on one side of the top, I followed Rylee down to the lake. My chest felt tight already. I remembered all too well how damn cold this water was at this time of the year. But that was why it was so exciting. Sure, hypothermia was a risk, but it was a refreshing plunge. It woke you up for sure. There was nothing so freeing as taking the deadly plunge into the lake, only to resurface, thrilled to be breathing.
Walking side by side on the thin trail that snaked through the trees, towels wrapped around us, Rylee and I strolled and talked, enjoying the forest that surrounded us on all sides. The thin path through the trees like a red carpet through the dense wilderness. “So, you’re sure taking this breakup well.” Rylee giggled, bumping her hip into mine. Causing me to stumble off the deer trail we were following. She reached out to catch me, but missed, her towel dropping into the crisp leaves and brown needles, exposing her bright pink bikini with the yellow stripes.
Regaining my footing, I rolled my eyes at her. Giving a dismissive shrug as she snatched the towel back up and wrapped it around her. “Yeah. I guess my mind is elsewhere, anyway. Ditching him was a relief, really. We were too different.”
That was true mostly, but really, I couldn’t think about Liam when my mind was twisted around Ryland and all the memories that accompanied him. There was no comparison, and I knew it. Hell, the fact that Liam was a polar opposite from Ryland was the whole reason I gave it a go. I needed to find some attraction to the good, rather than the bad. Surely it did me no good, but I tried and that was all that mattered. Thought that counts and all.
“That’s for sure.” She laughed so hard she snorted. “You need some burly mountain man, a bad boy or something. That’s the only man who could handle you. Not some polo wearing lawyer. You’re way too backwoods for that.”
My throat went dry. I knew damn well she didn’t mean her brother. But that’s immediately who I pictured. He was big and admittedly more burly now than he used to be. He was a bad boy, well used to be, and was every bit homegrown man from the mountains. Shaking the image of him standing next to me like a prospective boyfriend from my head, I scoffed. After our ride yesterday, I needed some mental cleansing from this man before I got myself into trouble. “Is that an insult? I can’t tell.” I chortled, covering my mouth with hand, preventing from snorting too.
“Hell no! You need to be.” Waving her hand over the narrow path and trees, she giggled. “You see where we come from. If you weren’t I’d be ashamed.” We laughed in unison for a bit as we continued down the path.
Soon we were on the edge of the lake. Water and trees as far as the eye could see. The soon to be setting sun glowed off the rippling water, looking like a Bob Ross painting with happy little trees. It was beyond beautiful and I couldn’t wait to jump in. Dropping my pink striped beach towel onto the rocks, I kicked my flip-flops off and ran for it. The chilly air was sharp on my skin as I dashed to the bank and jumped in. As soon as my head was above water, I was wiped out by the splash surrounding Rylee’s cannonball. The water felt like knives on my skin as I started treading in place amongst the soggy fall leaves that floated around us. It didn’t take long for the burn to go away as a comfortable numbness set in. Swimming around felt so exhilarating as we continued our talk. Bobbing up and down in the icy water.
“So this new book?” Rylee questioned, practicing her backstroke around me. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me! BUT TOLD MY MOM! What the hell!” She giggled. “I’ve been listening to your elves and kingdoms dribble for years, but you didn’t tell me this?!” She feigned disappointment.
“It’s just a thought. I don’t have the details worked out yet.” Lie, Lie, lie. I had definitely figured out what I was going to write. But it for sure wasn’t something I could tell her about.
The name, “The Rules., spun around my mind since the first night here. Call me a glutton for punishment, but I was debating writing about Ryland. Our time here in the cabin. Only this time. We would have some happy ending. Hoping that maybe it could be a way to process how I was feeling without the risk of a shattered heart.
“Bullshit, I’ve seen the gears turning.” She called me out, stopping in place. “You know exactly what you are going to write. Just tell me.”
I shrugged playfully. “It’ll be a surprise I guess.”
She rolled her eyes, splashing me. “That’s so unfair. I’d tell you what I’m working on.” She pouted as I wiped the water from my face.
“I can’t even begin to understand what you’re working on, anyway.”
“Touche” She giggled before a wave of shivers hit her. She grabbed her upper arms and rubbed them. “Ugh. I’m frozen now.”
I giggled. She was far more slender than me. I was more average compared to her gangly build. It took a lot more to chill my chunky butt down. I’d be a perfect candidate for winter athletics. It took quite a bit to chill me to the bone. “I’m going to hang back, if that’s cool.” I called out to her as she began swimming to shore.
“So you can think about your secret book?” She raised a brow.
“You know me too well.”
“If you aren’t at the cabin in an hour, though, I’m going to come get you. I don’t need an icicle as a friend.” She warned with a laugh. “The hugs would be shit.”
“Noted.”
Losing track of the time, I swam. Enjoying the building tingle on my skin, covered in goosebumps as I floated on my back. With my eyes closed, I just focused on the surrounding sounds. The animals, the sway of trees and their rustling leaves. Immersing myself into the moment completely as my mind wandered to my book. I could tell the numbness was trickling up my toes, but I couldn’t be bothered to get out. This was the first moment since arriving at the cabin where I felt completely at peace. I was going to take advantage of it. What better place and time to plan out the finer details of this upcoming book.
I may have given us different names, but I knew with all of me, it was Ryland and I. I knew it when I closed my eyes and saw it play out the way I wished. How I could have handled that night. Where it could have gone. Reliving his touch, his kiss—— just like a fiend. Never in my life had I wanted to relive a moment like I did this one. It was sick and hopeless, but I couldn’t help myself.
