Four Silences Broken, page 18
“Maybe that’s the problem.” Rachel sighed. The anger that had been simmering away had suddenly subsided.
“What are you saying?”
Rachel shook her head. Her temples were throbbing. “I don’t know. I’m tired. I don’t want to talk any more tonight, but if you are serious about us having a future together, you need to find a way to make things right. I have to know that you understand how important my friends are to me and I’d really like them to be important to you too.”
She turned and headed towards the stairs, before stopping and looking back.
“By the way, we found out Joseph’s mystery woman was Caroline. Jo is their daughter.”
With that she trudged upstairs, tugged off her clothes and collapsed into bed. She listened for a moment, but it didn’t sound like Sarah was going to follow her. Rachel didn’t know who she was angrier with, Sarah or herself. Meera wasn’t the only one who was guilty of avoiding a confrontation. She had chosen not to deal with the simmering resentment Sarah felt towards Lucy. She closed her eyes with one of her mother’s many pieces of advice ringing in her ears: “Never go to sleep on an argument.”
*
When she woke up the next morning, there was no sign of Sarah. Quickly, she checked the wardrobe and gave a sigh of relief: her clothes were still hanging there. Downstairs she found a note. Gone to York. Back soon. Love you. Rachel’s first reaction was relief, then she felt a stab of irritation. Couldn’t she give work a miss for once? Not wanting to wait for Sarah to return, she went over to the farmhouse. After all the drama of the previous day, she hadn’t spoken to her mother properly. However, instead of Mary, she found Becky folding a pile of laundry.
“You’re optimistic if you think you’ll be wearing a bikini in Hartwell anytime soon,” she commented wryly.
“Soon I won’t be in Hartwell,” replied Becky without looking up.
“Why? Where are you going?”
“Goa.”
“Goa?”
“Yes. It’s in India.”
“I know, but why are you going?”
“Nish has got a job out there. He’s going to be running a bar on the beach and I’m going to help him. We’re leaving straight after his sister’s wedding.”
“You won’t be here for Christmas?”
“No.”
“What about Minty?”
“She’s coming with me of course. Nish’s contract is for two months at first, but if things work out, it could become permanent.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes, why shouldn’t I be? What do you want me to do? Stay here, where people will always wonder if I knew what Max was up to? Always that sense of suspicion, even from my own sister.”
Rachel opened her mouth to protest, but Becky was in full rant.
“I can’t live like that, and I don’t want Minty to either. It’s time for a fresh start for both of us.”
Rachel stared at her for a moment. The expression on Becky’s face was daring her to argue back, but instead she took a breath. Up until a few months ago, this was exactly what she’d wanted too, to leave Hartwell and travel somewhere exotic and escape her problems. How could she blame her sister for wanting to do the same?
“That sounds great. We’ll miss you, but I really hope everything works out for you.”
Becky looked momentarily stunned before mumbling, “Thanks,” then scooped the laundry into her arms and marched out of the room.
A few seconds later, Mary appeared. “Did you know about Becky going to India with Nish?”
“Yes, she told me a while ago. She wants a fresh start, and I can’t say I blame her. It’s going to be a real wrench saying goodbye to her and Minty, but it’s only for a few months, and I can always go and visit them, especially now all this business is over. I can relax more, and of course I won’t be running the farm.”
“I can’t believe you kept it to yourself. This and everything else.”
“We all thought it was for the best.”
“For who? You knew Jo was desperate to find her mother.”
“Knowing wouldn’t have made any difference to her health. Besides it wasn’t my secret to tell. We each tried to convince Caroline to say something when we realised who Jo was, but she refused. I think she was frightened of being rejected, so we stayed quiet out of loyalty to her.”
“There’s loyalty and there’s helping dispose of a dead body. You could have got into serious trouble, Mum.”
Mary gave her a knowing look. “As could you, but that didn’t stop you trying to hide what could have been a murder weapon. I hope you haven’t been too harsh on Sarah because she handed it over to the police.”
Rachel shifted uncomfortably under her mother’s gaze. Although she hadn’t admitted so last night she knew she bore at least some of the responsibility for what Sarah had done. She’d known she had a problem with Lucy and had chosen to ignore it rather than have it out with her.
“She wanted to get Lucy into trouble. She thought she and Rob might have killed Rupert,” she replied, knowing she sounded like a petulant teenager.
“An easy conclusion to jump to and I think it’s obvious she’s always been jealous of Lucy, and I have to say you haven’t always helped the situation.” Rachel opened her mouth to protest, but Mary silenced her. “You know Sarah loves you very much, but underneath that confidence and all those qualifications, I think she is quite insecure. I don’t suppose it helps that you have been keeping secrets from her. Not that I’m one to talk.”
“Did Dad know what you did?”
“About Jo? No?” admitted Mary. “Caroline hid herself away at the Hall when her bump began to show—we couldn’t risk Alexander finding out. He was such a dreadful man.” Mary shuddered.
“Why didn’t Caroline leave him?”
“I think she was scared. She’d seen what Alexander was capable of and how he managed to get away with what he did. Besides, when she lost Joseph all the fight went out of her. I wish you could have known her before all this, when she first arrived here. She was so open and full of life. She really threw herself into village life, then Alexander began to show his true colours. Annabel had tried to warn her—she knew what he was like—but by the time Caroline found out herself, Rupert had arrived. She got a slight reprieve when he was posted abroad, then along came Joseph. He was handsome, kind, clever, but in a quiet way, not showy. He fell in love with her and the village. He even bought the Grange so they could stay in Hartwell and keep Rupert close to his family.
“Caroline absolutely blossomed when she was with him. After he died, she was never the same again—cold, distant even with us, but determined. She wanted to protect Rupert until she realised he needed protecting from himself more than anyone else. Then when Freddie came along her focus shifted to him.” She gave her head a little shake as if lost in her memories. “Going back to your dad. When the time came for Caroline to have the baby, Joan and I said we were going down to London for a few days to stay with Annabel. We made some excuse about there being a concert or a show we wanted to see. If your father or Bill did suspect anything they never mentioned it.”
“What about Rupert?”
Mary shook her head again. “It was late when Caroline called me. I snuck out after he’d fallen asleep and when I got back, he was still snoring.” She smiled. “You know what a heavy sleeper he was. Joan wasn’t so lucky with Bill. He wanted to know where she was going. She made up some excuse, but she hated lying to him. It’s been a burden we have all carried. Shirley was convinced Reverend Davenport had seen her leaving the pub, but he never said anything.”
A thought suddenly occurred to Rachel. “Is that why you decided to finish farming and are okay about Becky leaving? Did you think the rev might say something, now he’s getting more confused?”
“Not necessarily him, although he has started talking about Joseph a lot recently. You see he was the last person to talk to him. He was adamant that he couldn’t have taken his own life because he’d been so happy when they’d spoken. It really bothered him. Of course Alexander used his influence to get the verdict he wanted, but no it wasn’t only the rev we were worried about. None of us are getting any younger. It was only a few months ago that I was getting tested for dementia. I couldn’t shake the feeling that sooner or later, we would be found out, I even wondered if the guilt would be too much for Caroline as she became weaker. Despite the three of us pleading and Meera’s best efforts she’s still resisting any treatment. But to answer your question, yes, I thought slowly handing control of this place to you and encouraging Becky to make a new start would be best, in case anything did happen.”
“I wish you’d told me all this before.”
“I think we both need to be more honest with each other and everyone else.”
Rachel nodded, then another thought occurred to her. “Meera doesn’t know what happened yesterday. I should let her know. She’ll want to check on Jo.” Jumping up, she gave Mary a quick kiss, then headed back to the cottage.
*
The moment she put the phone down, she heard the sound of a car outside. A few minutes, later Sarah appeared in the kitchen holding a small cardboard box. Rachel didn’t know if she was still feeling emotional from speaking to a shocked Meera, but she felt tears well up in her eyes.
“I wasn’t sure you were coming back,” she said, thinking how beautiful Sarah looked even with unwashed hair and dark shadows below her eyes.
“I left you a note to say I was going to York.”
“An emergency at work?” she asked, unable to keep the edge out of her voice.
“No, I called into the university, but it wasn’t really work. I thought about everything you said last night, and you were right. What I did was purely malicious. I didn’t sleep thinking how much trouble I could have got you all into.”
“Maybe I should have told you what happened that night,” conceded Rachel. “I certainly should have talked to you about Lucy. I knew you didn’t like me seeing her.”
“Maybe, but it doesn’t change the fact I have been jealous of all your friends, and I haven’t made enough of an effort to join in with the village, so I wanted to make amends. First, I collected up all the letters between Joseph and the woman we now know is Caroline and put them in the right order. Then rather than keep them, I dropped them off at Jo’s cottage. I thought it could be a way for her to learn about her dad, and perhaps she and Caroline could bond over them.”
“Don’t you need them for your research?” asked Rachel. Sarah hardly let anything come between her and her work, but she simply shrugged.
“I photocopied the important bits, but most of it is personal stuff. It should be with the woman he loved and his daughter.”
Rachel nodded silently. Sarah was obviously trying her hardest.
“Then, this morning,” she continued, “I went to see one of my colleagues. He’s an English professor and he collects early editions of the Brontë sisters. I persuaded him to sell me a rare volume of Charlotte’s poetry. I thought Meera would love it, and I know you’ve been struggling to find her a wedding present.”
Rachel picked up the delicate leather-bound book. She couldn’t have picked anything better. Sarah really did know her old university friend.
“She will absolutely love it. It must have cost a fortune.”
“It doesn’t matter,” said Sarah, who was now blushing furiously.
“Thank you. It’s perfect.”
“I’m also going to ask Meera to recommend a counsellor. Someone I can talk to about my insecurities and trust issues.”
Rachel reached over and gently placed her hand on Sarah’s shoulder. “Really? That would be even more perfect than the book.”
Sarah gave her a shy smile. “I’m not done yet. I’ve saved the best for last. My gift for Lucy. Will you come up to Hartwell Hall with me so I can give it to her?”
Rachel took her hand. “I’d love to.”
*
Sarah cleared her throat. Rachel knew she was feeling awkward and embarrassed, but Rob and Lucy were simply sitting with their arms around each other on the sofa, looking more loved up than ever and waiting expectantly to find out what this surprise visit was all about. Rachel was perched on the edge of the opposite sofa. She had no idea what Sarah was going to say.
“Recently,” began Sarah, “my team and I have been spending time studying the Hartwell nobles. Particularly the inscriptions. We want to create a central exhibition around them, you see—after all who doesn’t love a good legend?” She gave a weak smile and Lucy and Rob nodded politely. “We began translating the runic symbols in conjunction with the letters from Joseph Baxter Tarrant that Meera found in her attic. He believed the original translation, by a Victorian academic, was incorrect.”
She then produced a photo of one of the Hartwell nobles that had been enlarged.
“The symbol that has always been thought to mean ‘cursed’ is actually upside down when the noble is held with the hart upright, do you see?”
Lucy peered at the picture Sarah was holding up and squinted. “Not really. They just look like a bunch of squiggles to me.”
“It’s that symbol right there—you see it’s inverted.” Sarah beamed at Lucy’s blank face. “Inverted means the opposite. The same symbols are engraved around the edge of the well. Once we saw that, well, we knew for sure. Joseph’s hunch had been correct.”
Rachel could see she wasn’t getting through to Lucy. “It means the Hanleys are blessed not cursed, Luce.”
Lucy’s perplexed face finally broke into a smile. “Really? Freddie isn’t cursed? We had it wrong all this time? That’s wonderful! Thank you so much, Sarah! Honestly, you have no idea what a relief this is.”
Lucy sprang up and threw her arms around the blushing archaeologist. Then Rob stood up and shook her hand.
“Cheers, Sarah, this means a lot.”
“That’s all right,” she mumbled. “I wanted to put Lucy’s mind at rest. I know it has been bothering her.”
“Will you both stay for a glass of champagne? After the last twenty-four hours we’ve all had, I feel ready to celebrate.”
Rachel remained silent and raised her eyebrows at Sarah, who smiled and nodded.
“Yes, Lucy. Thank you. We would love to.”
Rob rose to his feet. “You get the glasses, Luce. I’ll get the fizz.”
When Rachel and Sarah were left alone. Rachel went over to Sarah, wrapped her arms around her and softly placed a kiss on her lips.
“You were right—that was the perfect gift. From now on, I think you should be in charge of present buying for the two of us.”
“That sounds good to me,” replied Sarah with a smile. “I really am very sorry for the way I behaved.”
“I’m sorry too. I should have been more supportive, knowing how you felt about Lucy.”
Rachel kissed her again and pulled her down on to the large squishy sofa, then turned to look at her. Sarah’s expression was inscrutable.
Rachel lowered her voice. “Is what you told Lucy true? Because we both know she and Rob, or probably anyone else in the village, are never going to read any academic papers you write.”
Sarah didn’t quite meet her gaze. “I know,” she replied as out in the hallway came the sound of a champagne cork popping.
Chapter Twenty
Meera had missed Joan’s birthday party. Half an hour before she was due to leave Agnes had turned up unexpectedly and four days early. She had declared that the train companies charged more the closer they got to Christmas, and she wouldn’t pay their inflated prices. Following her plan to give her future mother-in-law a second chance and see the best in people, Meera phoned Lucy to apologise then prepared something for them to eat. Remembering Agnes preferred simple food she made vegetable soup and served it with French bread. However, Agnes still complained that it tasted too spicy and the bread too crunchy. Then she took herself off to bed at seven o’clock, leaving Meera wishing she was with her friends instead.
The next day her own parents arrived to stay for the wedding too. Her mother wanted to give herself plenty of time to prepare the food and her father needed no excuse to spend time with his daughter and grandson. It was the first time both parents had met. Meera had made lunch for the four of them. Ben was out on call, covering for his colleagues, so he could take time off after the wedding, and Krish was in bed with a cold.
Things were not going well. Her mother, wearing a tight smile, kept trying to start new topics of conversation only to be met with monosyllabic answers from Agnes. Her father had given up speaking all together and kept his head down, eating quickly, clearly wanting the meal to be over with as soon as possible. Meera was avoiding making eye contact with her mother, knowing she was cross with her for not confronting Agnes.
As they finished their main course in silence, the telephone out in the hall rang, and it was with some relief that Meera excused herself and went to answer it. It was Rachel. Meera knew straightaway something was wrong. Her normally unflappable friend sounded stressed and almost tearful as her words came tumbling down the line.
Almost ten minutes later, Meera put down the receiver and took a deep breath as she tried to process everything Rachel had told her. Rob being arrested, then released, Caroline admitting to being Jo’s mother. Then Jo fainting again. She felt quite dizzy trying to make sense of it all. Instinctively, she placed her hand over her stomach. She hadn’t allowed herself to get excited yet. Unlike Jo, she had a very regular cycle that she monitored religiously. She was late only by a few days and like Lucy had said she’d been under a lot of stress recently. It could be a false alarm.
“Meera! Are you serving dessert?” Agnes’s shrill voice came through from the dining room. Meera didn’t respond. What if it wasn’t a false alarm? She thought about the colonel, who would have loved to have a family, but instead had chosen those he felt closest to, to bestow his beloved wife’s jewellery on. Then she thought about what Rachel had just told her about Caroline, who had made impossible choices to protect those she loved. Finally, she thought about Jo, who must have been so scared to be so close to creating the family she’d never had only to almost see it snatched away from her. There was seeing the best in people and there was being a fool. She walked briskly back into the dining room.
