Her Shadow: A Lesbian/Sapphic Apocalyptic Romance, page 11
Kara leaned back slightly and raised both hands in a nonthreatening gesture. “I’m not afraid of you. You’re delirious. You’re going to be okay now.”
Sam’s grip on the knife loosened as she met Kara’s gaze. But she couldn’t let go of the fear that she could turn any minute and kill Kara. She would have no control of herself once the infection reached her brain. “You don’t understand. I don’t know if I’m…if I’m still me.”
Kara shook her head and smiled. Sam could see the kindness in her eyes. Instead of comforting her, it only increased the sensation of panic in her chest. “You’re Sam. You’re here. And I’m not losing you.”
There was a brief pause, a tense silence hanging between them. To Sam, it felt as if it was the calm before the storm—the eye of the storm. But before Sam could react, Kara grabbed Sam’s arm and pulled her up into a tight embrace. The knife slipped out of her hand.
“I’m sorry,” Kara whispered against Sam’s hair. “I should never have doubted you. I should never have left. What the hell was I even thinking? I won’t blame you if you don’t, but please forgive me. I should’ve fought harder for you. I was scared.”
Sam’s heart pounded in her chest, and for a moment, she couldn’t breathe. The weight of everything she’d been carrying was too much—the fear, the loneliness, the heartbreak.
“You let me leave,” she choked out.
Kara pulled back just enough to look into Sam’s eyes. “You’ll never lose me again,” she said, her voice firm. “I’m here. I’m so sorry.”
For a moment, they stood there holding each other, the danger, the fear, the uncertainty—all of it forgotten.
Eventually, Kara pulled back, wiping the dirt and sweat from Sam’s face. “You’re not infected,” she said quietly. “Do you understand? You’re going to be just fine. Well, you may need stitching up, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. We need to get you to safety.”
Sam’s eyes flickered with relief, though she still felt the weight of everything that had happened. “I think you’re right. But can we be sure? I fought so many of them. I want to say fifty, but I’m prone to exaggeration, right? I reckon probably between five and ten,” she whispered.
“Listen, I know you,” Kara replied softly. “And I trust you. Do you hear me, Sam? I trust you.”
Sam’s chest tightened with emotion. She didn’t feel like she really had Kara’s trust, not after everything that had happened, but here she was, standing in front of her, offering it freely. “So, what comes next?” Sam asked. “I’m on my way to find my people. I don’t know where they are, exactly, but they were headed south on this road. I’ll catch up with them. But I don’t want to do it alone. Are you going to come with me?”
Kara smiled, brushing a stray lock of hair from Sam’s face. “I have to go back, Sam. You know that. But we can go back together. We’ll be safer there. And they’re taking on board what you’ve been saying.”
“They think I stole from them.”
“Well, they know you didn’t do it now. It was a couple of kids. I found the stash, and I exposed the little fuckers! They’re all sorry.”
“But will that even make any difference? I mean, so what? They accused me with zero evidence. What’s to stop it happening again? They don’t want me there.”
“We’ll go and see the captain together. I can explain everything.”
“I don’t think too much of your captain, Kara. I really don’t. And I don’t care anymore. About her. About them. I tried my hardest. Fuck them.”
“Please don’t say that. You care about me, Sam. Maybe we can go and join your people at some point, but I can’t manage it right now. I can’t. I’m not ready to stay out here in the wild. Not full time. Maybe later, down the line. What do you think?”
“I think I can’t go back. That place isn’t for me.”
But I’m for you, aren’t I?” Kara said with a faint smile on her face.
“You are. Yes. Or at least I thought you were.”
“Please,” Kara pleaded. “Please come back with me. I’ll take care of you, just like you took care of me. I can’t lose what we have. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, I’ve ever loved. You’re everything to me, Sam.”
As the two stood there, there was tension between them, but Sam couldn’t deny her feelings towards Kara.
“Yes, what we have is sacred, Kara. You’re right. But the first sign of trouble, and I’m out of there. I want to make it perfectly clear. We’ll try it your way, and if they fuck up again, we'll do it my way. That’s my condition. I want to love you unconditionally, but that’s my condition.”
Kara’s hand lingered on Sam’s cheek, and Sam allowed herself to lean into it. The rough calluses on Kara’s fingers felt strangely comforting.
“I was so scared,” Sam admitted, her voice trembling with the weight of emotions she had kept buried. “Not just of turning into one of them, but of losing you, too.”
“You’re not going to lose me. I’m here, Sam. I’ll always be here.”
Sam closed her eyes. She felt as if she’d been pulled back from the edge she had been teetering on since she’d left Fort Haven.
For a moment, there was nothing but the sound of their breathing. The world had quieted.
Sam opened her eyes, her gaze meeting Kara’s. “I’m glad we’re not fighting,” she mumbled. “Look at the state of me. I’m covered in blood and guts. In your shoes, I’d have turned around and run back to the settlement as soon as I laid eyes on me.”
“I know,” Kara giggled. “I thought about it.”
Sam realized just how close she had come to losing the one person who mattered.
“If we get back to the settlement, at least I can keep away from the infected for a while,” Sam said, her voice cracking. “I didn’t know what to do. I panicked. Jesus, it’s awful out here. I need to rest up. This wound is fucking stinging like crazy.”
“Things are going to be different. I promise you that,” Kara reached out to Sam’s hand, leading the way back.
“You know, the whole time I’ve been away from you, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Meeting you changed everything, and I was truly heartbroken when I thought I’d lost you.” Sam wiped her eyes.
“I understand, because I love you so much, Sam. I always will, and I promise from now on, I won’t let anything, or anyone, tear us apart.”
Sam smiled, squeezing her hand before pulling her closer to kiss Kara.
“I love you, too. Please don’t ever break that promise.”
And with that, they made their way back to Fort Haven, ready to fight their way back to happiness one step at a time.
The End.
EPILOGUE
ONE YEAR LATER
Kara stepped into the shower, feeling the rush of hot water cascade over her skin.
The heat hit her body, loosening the knots of tension in her muscles. Steam swirled in the air around her, thick and heavy. She sighed in relief. She stood still for a moment, letting the water drench her hair and run down her body in rivulets, washing away that day’s grime. Her fingers massaged her scalp as her thoughts drifted inevitably to Sam.
Her heart fluttered, almost skipping a beat, as she pictured Sam's strong, protective hands and the way they held her close at night, her fingers tracing the lines of her body. It always felt as though Sam was mapping out the curves and planes of her skin, learning her all over again every time they touched. Kara held her breath as she felt her own hands slide down her stomach, the slickness of her wet skin guiding her motions. Her fingers dipped lower, teasing herself, imagining that it was Sam there with her instead. It started the same way it always did between the two of them—the deep pull of desire and the undeniable attraction they felt for each other even after a year of shared life in Fort Haven.
The sensations heightened with every stroke, her body responding to the vivid image in her mind of Sam’s lips on hers, the soft moan of pleasure that Sam always let slip when their mouths met. Kara bit her lip, her hand moving with more urgency now, the pressure building as she remembered the feel of Sam’s mouth traveling down her neck, biting, teasing. It wasn’t just desire; it was love, deep and all-encompassing. Kara exhaled a trembling breath, her fingers moving faster, imagining Sam’s touch—rougher now, insistent, the way Sam always was when she was desperate to feel every inch of her.
Her body arched, her free hand pressing against the cool wall for support as her legs weakened under the pressure of her own touch. She gasped, the sound soft but desperate, muffled by falling water, her fingers circling her clit and driving her wild. Her mind was consumed by Sam—by the way, Sam would whisper her name, in that low voice that sent shivers down her spine, by the way, she would push her body against hers, hard.
With a final, sharp intake of breath, Kara’s body tensed, her climax crashing over her like a wave. Her knees shook as the pleasure traveled upwards through her belly, leaving her breathless and dizzy. The water now felt soothing against her flushed skin. Slowly, her hand fell away, and she leaned her forehead against the shower wall, letting the water continue to pour over her as her breathing steadied.
Sam. It’ll always be you, Sam.
As the sensations faded, Kara let her thoughts drift beyond her relationship. Fort Haven had changed so much since Sam had arrived. What had started as a rigid, distrustful community led by the captain who ruled with an iron fist had now transformed into something so different, it was beyond belief. Kara felt that she and Sam had definitely had something to do with that change. Sam had really pushed for new ideas, and Kara had followed her lead. They were living in a world that seemed determined to destroy them, and so survival strategies, new plans, and shared experiences made life more bearable.
Fort Haven was more than surviving these days. It had come to life. They had devised innovative ways to grow food—vertical farming that utilized every square inch of space and hydroponic systems that meant they could cultivate vegetables and herbs year-round. The once-barren soil within the walls was now full of plants, tended by the community in shifts. They had tomatoes, beans, and leafy greens.
Over the last few months, new families and solo survivors have been welcomed, each bringing with them new knowledge and skills.
Sam had led the efforts to build a new and improved solar power system that now provided Fort Haven with electricity. The panels were scavenged from abandoned towns and cities, carefully transported on foot in teams, and installed piece by piece until the entire community could rely on the sun for warmth and light. No more dim, flickering candles or sputtering fires, the energy they generated powered their cabins, their communal kitchen, and even their water filtration system, which had once seemed like an impossible dream.
Kara turned the shower handle, the cascade of water slowing to a final, reluctant drip. The sensation of steam clung to her skin, still warm and flushed from the heat, and the scent of Sam’s homemade lavender soap lingered in the air. She stepped out onto the cool, unforgiving concrete floor. Reaching for a towel hanging nearby, she pressed the soft fabric to her damp skin, starting at her arms, then across her breasts, her nipples hard as she savored the simple ritual of drying off. Each movement was slow and deliberate as if trying to hold onto the fleeting warmth a little longer.
As she left the room and closed the door behind her, her eyes landed on Sam, who was standing by the window, her back to Kara, her broad shoulders framed by the light filtering in through the glass. Sam turned at the sound of Kara’s footsteps, her face breaking into a broad smile, her eyes dark with the same longing that Kara had only a few minutes earlier felt in the shower.
“You think of me? That’s your post-orgasm face right there,” Sam teased affectionately. She stepped forward, her arms slipping around Kara’s waist, pulling her close.
Kara smiled, pressing her body against Sam’s, feeling the heat of her skin through the thin fabric of her robe. “Always,” Kara whispered, her lips brushing against Sam’s ear.
Sam’s hands moved to the small of Kara’s back, fingers tracing the curve of her spine. “Good,” Sam murmured, her voice deep and rough with desire. “Because I’ve been thinking about you… and your post shower look really does something to me.”
Kara laughed softly, her heart swelling with love for this woman who had become everything to her—her partner, her lover, her protector. “Really? Well, come over here. Let’s rectify that.”
They stood there for a moment, holding each other, the quiet beat of their hearts in sync. Kara tilted her head up, her lips finding Sam’s in a slow, tender kiss. The kiss deepened as Sam’s hand slid under her robe, and her fingers splayed across the bare skin of Kara’s hips.
Kara moaned softly into Sam’s mouth, her body already responding to the familiarity of Sam’s touch. It didn’t take much—just a look, a word, a brush of skin—and the fire between them would ignite all over again, as strong as it had been the first time.
But there was something different about their sex these days. Lust was still a significant factor, but it was so much more than that. It was about everything they’d been through—the battles, the fear, the loss—and how they’d come out the other side almost unscathed.
“I love you,” Kara whispered against Sam’s lips, her hand sliding up to cup Sam’s face.
Sam’s eyes softened, her expression full of the same unspoken emotion that Kara felt every time she looked at her. “I love you too,” Sam replied, her voice barely more than a breath. “Always.”
They kissed again, slower this time, savoring the moment and the taste of each other. Kara’s hands roamed across Sam’s body as she continued to commit to memory every line, every muscle, every scar—a map of their shared journey etched into her skin.
Kara murmured between kisses, her voice laced with playful mischief, “I’m pretty sure I could spend the rest of my life exploring you… and still find new places to get lost in.”
Sam chuckled. “Good thing we’re in this for life, then,” she teased, pulling Kara even closer. “Because I’m not going anywhere.”
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This book is a stand alone read in The Lost World Series. The next book is up for pre-order here https://mybook.to/tlw4
When Rosa’s community captures Elise, a former enemy soldier, she’s forced to confront her growing attraction to the fierce, independent woman. Tensions rise as Elise’s escape attempts threaten their fragile peace, but it’s during a life-threatening attack that the two women are forced to work together.
As they fight side by side, the heat between them grows undeniable. Trusting each other becomes their only hope for survival, but can love bloom in a broken world?
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Grace Parkes, Her Shadow: A Lesbian/Sapphic Apocalyptic Romance
