Cherry on Top, page 23
Shea did as she was instructed and waited an extra five seconds before stopping the recording, leaving space to edit. “Nicely done. That was great.”
“You think?”
“Definitely.” Shea handed the phone back to her. “It’s a nice start to what I think is the exact right way to go. It felt like the real you, you know?” She picked up her mug and sipped her coffee, staring over the rim at Cherry for a full ten seconds before saying, “I’m proud of you, Cher.”
“Yeah?”
A nod. A smile. Then, “Do you think you’ll let her know?”
They both knew who Shea meant by her. Cherry inhaled a deep breath and blew it out through pursed lips. “I’m honestly torn.”
Shea sat on the chair in the corner and focused her full attention on Cherry. “Tell me why. What are you torn between? Talk to the most amazing person on the planet.”
“Please. You love that I called you that. Admit it.”
“Oh, I totally admit it. And it’s true.” They laughed together, then became serious again. “Talk to me.”
“I don’t want her to think I’m making any of these changes just to win her back,” Cherry blurted, then wrinkled her nose and groaned. “’Cause I’m not. I mean, she was definitely the catalyst, but this just feels right now. You know?”
“I do. I already told you I’m proud of you, and I am. I just think…” Shea frowned, then lifted one shoulder in a half shrug. “I just think she deserves to see this new you. This real you. The you I’ve known all along. Because she’s pretty wonderful.”
Her soft words brought tears to Cherry’s eyes, and she was about to playfully scold her for that when her phone pinged a text. “Ugh. Probably Amanda trying to give me work on my day off.” She grabbed her phone and her heart rate kicked up as she read the message.
From Ellis.
Hey, you. I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately and I was wondering if we could, you know, really talk. About everything. You up for it?
She must’ve made a face because Shea sat up straight and said, “What? What is it? Is everything okay?”
“It’s Ellis.”
“Oh my God, we conjured her!” Shea nearly shouted. “We are that good. What did she say?”
“She wants to talk.”
“Good. That’s good.” The expression on Cherry’s face must’ve been concerning because Shea’s eyes narrowed. “Isn’t it?”
She blinked a few times at the phone in her hand before looking back up at Shea, wide-eyed, she knew.
“Well? You up for it?”
“I really, really am, Shea. I really, really am.”
“I kinda thought so.” Shea tipped her head to one side and her smile was wide.
“What if she just wants to tell me off again?” It wasn’t likely, but it was also a possibility. “I mean, she pretty much blames the whole of social media for what happened to her sister.”
“Okay, tiny bit of an exaggeration there.” Shea held her thumb and forefinger a scant distance apart.
“Yeah, okay,” she admitted, her tone begrudging. “But she blames people like me.”
“She blames people like you who create goals and lives that are phony and unattainable.” When Cherry met her eyes, she added, “That’s not you anymore, is it?”
One determined head shake. “It’s not.”
“Do you miss her?”
“God, yes. More than I can even explain.”
“Then talk to the woman.”
“Okay. Yeah.” She texted one simple word. Absolutely.
The gray dots bounced, and the next message surprised her. What time are you out of work tonight?
“She wants to know when I get out of work.” Slight panic set in, and her heart began to pound in anticipation of what that meant.
Shea voiced it. “She wants to talk, like, now.”
A steadying breath. “Probably better that way. Maybe she just needs closure.” That thought made her sadder than she even expected.
“Or maybe she doesn’t, Little Miss Darkness and Gloom.”
With a scoff, Cherry texted back that she was off for the day and was free anytime. Ellis answered quickly. Cherry’s head snapped up and met Shea’s gaze. “Oh my God, you were right. Now. She wants to meet now. Oh my God.”
“That’s okay because you’re ready for that.” Shea’s voice was soft, her eyes kind.
A calm settled over her. She inhaled, exhaled slowly. “I am,” she said, not even having to think about it.
Their gazes held across the room, and Cherry felt suddenly energized. Suddenly confident. She could feel Shea’s love and her own confidence in the moment bolster her, and she sat up a little straighter. She texted Ellis back that she’d love to meet her, and they set up a place by the lake. With a glance down at herself, then a look back up, she asked, “How do I look?”
“Like the coolest, strongest, kindest woman I know.”
Again, Cherry felt her eyes well up, and her voice broke as she said, “Thanks, Shea.” She ran a finger under her eye. “Also, stop that. You’re gonna ruin my makeup.”
They stood together, and Shea held her arms open. Cherry walked into them, and they hugged fiercely. When the hug ended, Shea took Cherry’s face in both hands and looked her right in the eyes. “You got this?”
Cherry nodded, feeling astonishingly sure of herself. “I got this.”
“Yeah, you do. Now go get the girl.”
* * *
It hadn’t gotten any cooler, of course, as it was now midafternoon in the middle of July. The sun was blazing, and the humidity made Ellis feel like she was walking through water, her skin covered in a sheen of perspiration, her hair a frizztastic mess. Maybe she should’ve asked to meet Cherry someplace inside. That would’ve been smart.
“Now’s a good time to think of that,” she muttered to herself as she shook her head and walked along the lakeshore. But then the sun gods smiled on her, and she noticed an empty bench in the shade of a large oak tree, set back from the beach area, closer to the playground. Picking up her pace, she hurried to it before anybody else could snag it, and she sighed with relief as she sat down, the temperature noticeably cooler out of the sun. She sent Cherry a quick text letting her know exactly where along the lake she was, then slid her phone away and focused on breathing.
She was nervous.
There was no denying that. No way around it. She smoothed a hand over her hair and tried to focus on the kids that were shrieking with childhood joy on the nearby playground, swinging or sliding or spinning. And then there were the kids running into and out of the water, the gentle waves from the small lake teasing and chasing them as they squealed with delight. She flashed back to when she and Michaela were young, and their parents took them to a cottage in the Thousand Islands for a week one steamy summer. It was a hell of a long drive, but totally worth it. They’d played every single day in the water, having races and daring each other with handstands and flips off the floating raft that was anchored far below. Ah, to have that innocence again, no worries, no dread, no anxiety or stress about what was to come. She exhaled on a sigh.
“Well, that’s an ominous sound.”
Cherry’s voice tickled her from behind, and then she was there in front of her, the sun behind her as she looked down at Ellis through her sunglasses and grinned, and somehow—Ellis couldn’t explain it, or even begin to explain it—her world was suddenly righted. Like it had been slightly tilted, crooked, and when Cherry arrived, it straightened out, everything balanced and perfect once again. How the hell did she do that?
Pulling herself together quickly, she gave a small laugh. “I was just remembering what it was like to be that.” She pointed at two little girls in matching pink flowered bathing suits—clearly sisters—picking up shells from the edge of the water and showing them to each other.
Cherry sat on the bench next to her. “I always wanted a sister to play with. People say only children are spoiled, but they forget about the lonely part.”
“That’s sad,” Ellis said.
“Eh.” Cherry shrugged it off, and they both laughed softly. Then Cherry pushed her sunglasses up onto her head, met her eyes, held her gaze for a beat, and said quietly, “Hi.”
“Hey, you. How are you?”
“I’m hanging in there. You?” Cherry looked beautiful, despite the simple denim shorts and black tank top. Her skin was creamy, her lips sparkled with gloss, and she smelled like coconut, so perfectly apropos for the weather. Ellis inhaled quietly, taking in the scent.
“Same. How are things with Lila?” She was careful not to refer to the woman as Cherry’s mother until she was told that was okay.
“She’s been…honestly, pretty amazing. And I can’t even believe I’m saying that.” Cherry’s shoulders lifted and dropped. “I’m still not sure what to do with it.”
“That’s fantastic. I’m so glad to hear it.” And she was. “And you don’t have to do anything at all with it right now. Maybe just breathe, you know?”
“Yeah, that’s been my course of action.” It was clear by the expression on her face that Cherry wanted to say more, but even though Ellis would’ve been happy to go down that path with her, it wasn’t the path they were there to travel, and they both knew it.
Ellis cleared her throat the same time Cherry turned to face her.
“So—”
“I—”
They stopped. Laughed. Cherry nodded at her. “You first.”
Here we go.
“I’ve been following Cherry on Top.”
“You—” Cherry blinked at her, opened her mouth, closed it again. It was kind of adorable and made Ellis smile. “Really?”
“Really.”
“But why?”
“Well…” Ellis gazed off at the water, her eyes tracking the little sisters in pink again as she rolled different responses around in her head. Finally, she settled on the best one. The only one. The truth. “I missed you. That’s the main reason.”
“You did?” Cherry stared at her, clearly surprised.
“Yes, I did. And I decided I wanted to see what kind of content you posted.”
“Even though you were mad?”
“Even though I was mad.” She glanced down at her hands before saying, “I was shocked when I saw your post where you came clean about the fake girlfriend and everything.”
Cherry’s nod was subtle. She wet her lips. “Yeah,” was all she said as she looked Ellis in the eye.
“I didn’t tell you I was looking because I wanted to see what happened. Wow, you got decimated.”
Cherry’s stare broke and her face was half grin, half grimace. She gave a chuckle that sounded nothing but rueful. “Understatement of the year, right there. And I lost half my followers. Also fun.” The look she shot Ellis then was sheepish. “My own fault.”
Ellis grimaced and tipped her head one way, then the other. Cherry was right, but it didn’t make it any easier to know how bad the consequences had been. “Think you’ll get them back?”
Seeming to ponder the question, Cherry gazed out at the water for a moment before saying, “I don’t know that I’ll get old followers back, but I think maybe I might get some new ones.”
“Funny, I though the same thing. Especially after watching the one you posted today.”
Cherry’s head snapped around so fast, Ellis was surprised it didn’t make a whipping sound. “You watched that one?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Cherry clenched her teeth and made a face, which made Ellis laugh.
“What? It was great. I love this new angle, this new path.” She waited until Cherry looked at her. “The real life of a real lesbian.” Her air quotes were not sarcastic. At all. “It’s unique.”
“Shea said the same thing.” Cherry swallowed—Ellis saw it. Then she watched her face, watched her clearly debate whether to tell Ellis what was on her mind, and saw exactly when she decided she would. “I think this could be good. I have a lot of ideas.”
“Yeah? Like what? Tell me.” Ellis turned on the bench, bent one knee and rested it near Cherry’s thigh as she faced her, and in that moment, it hit her. Like a two-by-four to the head. She wanted this. She wanted to sit and listen to Cherry talk, listen to Cherry tell her what her ideas were, listen to Cherry give her opinions on life. She couldn’t stop smiling.
“Why are you grinning at me like that?”
A laugh burst out of her. “Sorry. I was just enjoying the moment.”
Cherry seemed to like that, to hold it and roll it around a little bit before getting back to the subject. “It’s the real life of a real lesbian, right? So I want to do recipes. Real recipes, even if they don’t work. I want to not only test makeup and clothes, but be honest about it, tell the truth. I want to go places and see how they treat LGBTQ folks. I want to mix drinks and bake cookies and go to Pride and document it all, but truly document it. No filters. No convenient edits.”
“I think that’s fantastic.” And she did. Plus, the excited light in Cherry’s eyes was contagious.
“Do you think…” Cherry nibbled at her bottom lip for a moment, as if debating whether to continue. “I think you have a unique angle, given what you and your sister went through. Would you be willing to sort of…help me? Review things before I post them? Let me know if I’m veering offtrack?”
The request took her by surprise, but her brain apparently needed no time to even think about it because it made her answer immediately. “I’d love to.”
“Yeah?” Cherry’s smile grew.
“Absolutely. Love to.”
“I think we would make a good team.”
“I think we do make a good team.” She held out her hand, palm up.
Cherry didn’t even hesitate. She laid her palm against Ellis’s and intertwined their fingers, and it honestly felt like their hands were made to be linked together, they fit that perfectly. “Thank you,” Cherry said softly.
“For what?”
“For showing me there’s a better way.”
She took the words to heart as they sat quietly, holding hands and watching summer life around the lake, and Ellis knew one thing for certain—nothing had felt so very right in a really long time.
Chapter Twenty-six
Cherry was bummed that it was already mid-August because that meant September was just around the corner, and then they would be headed toward fall. She liked fall just fine, but fall meant winter and winter meant cold and she hated to be cold. Couldn’t summer stick around for just a bit longer?
She sat in the diner at her usual corner table working on the latest claims she’d received. She only had another half hour before she’d have to head off to her first appointment. Until then, though, she was perfectly happy to nibble on the deliciously warm biscuit in front of her, the one that had been brought to her by the very sexy fill-in waitress with the blond hair and fabulous legs. She drizzled some honey over the butter she’d spread on it and took a bite, watching as Ellis topped off somebody’s coffee and then laughed at a joke one of the old gentlemen at the table must’ve told. When those blue eyes met hers across the diner, everything south of Cherry’s stomach tightened pleasantly.
Ellis had that effect.
They’d been moving very slowly and doing a ton of talking. On the phone. Over text. Face-to-face. Slow and steady wins the race, she’d said to herself more than once. And at this point, it wasn’t even a strategy. It just was. They were learning and growing, and they were doing it together. What more could she ask for?
Ellis approached her table. “Warm that coffee up for you, ma’am?”
“Please,” Cherry said, holding up her cup. “And if you call me ma’am one more time, we are over.”
“Liar,” Ellis said with a wink. She glanced around at the remaining customers and, seeming satisfied, sat down next to her. “It’s Friday.”
“All day.”
“Wanna come over for dinner?”
Cherry blinked at her. They’d spent the past month talking and meeting, but they hadn’t been to each other’s homes again yet. So this felt like a step. A big one. “I very much want to, yes.”
Ellis’s smile was soft and gorgeous. “Good. I’ll cook. You bring wine.”
“You’re bossy.”
“You love it.”
She wasn’t wrong, and Cherry watched as Ellis stood and walked away, the gentle sway of her hips doing delightful things to Cherry’s lower body.
God, was it time for dinner yet?
* * *
Dinner had been pretty amazing, if Ellis said so herself. Bolognese wasn’t complicated at all, but it tasted like it was, and if the sounds Cherry had made while eating her pasta were any indication, she’d knocked it out of the park.
“Oh my God, I’m so full,” Cherry said as they carried glasses of wine to the couch. Nugget lay sprawled on the back of it, and when they sat down, he put one paw on Ellis’s shoulder.
“Look at him, owning you,” Cherry said, reaching to stroke the cat’s soft back.
“He does this every time. He’s not big on me picking him up, and he doesn’t cuddle because I want him to. He cuddles when he wants to.”
“A cuddler on his own terms.”
“Exactly. I admit, I kinda love that about him.”
“Me, too.”
“But when I sit on the couch, he likes to put a paw on me.”
Silence fell for a moment, and then Cherry said softly, “It’s really nice to be back here.”
