Nykur, page 2
“I see you’re late too then?” he said, getting to his feet. She shrugged.
“I overslept, couldn’t be bothered to rush.”
“Really? And what did your mum have to say about that?”
“She wasn’t happy obviously. But like I told her, it’s practically the holidays; no one’s going to care.” She looked at him, her blue eyes fixing him intently for a moment whilst he was looking at the floor. “Have you cheered up since the weekend?”
“Yeah sorry about that, I was having a bad day.”
“When don’t you have one of those Hugh?” she asked him, adjusting her hair.
“Hey,” he said, “Me and Kain are planning to go to Ben’s after school; you can join us if you want.” Liana paused whilst she spent a moment considering the offer.
“Thanks, but I’ve got stuff to do at home. I would like to see you someday though.”
“Another time,” he said, one side of his mouth turning up in effect of a smile.
Hugh sat cross-legged on the blue cover of Ben’s bed, watching as he retrieved a hidden stash of sweets and opened them to share. He’d spent the entire school day looking forward to this. The PlayStation fired up and Kain took his position with the controller. Ben lay next to Hugh, helping himself to handfuls of food. The room was soon quiet with the sound of FIFA and content chewing.
“Last day of school tomorrow then lads,” Kain said. “Going to be a good summer, I reckon.” Both Hugh and Ben made noises of agreement.
“I can’t wait,” Ben said, still chewing.
“You guys got much planned for the summer?” Hugh asked.
“Not really. I’ll just be trying to stay out the house.” Kain replied.
“I’ve got to go to Grimsby, we’ve got family up there.” Ben chipped in, sounding glum. Hugh thought it sounded nice to get the chance to go somewhere new. There was a knock at the door. Ben’s mum peered in at them.
“You’re not eating all that are you?” Ben swallowed what he had been enjoying and slipped both hands under his sizeable thighs. “Dinner will be ready in a minute.”
“Ok mum,” he replied. The door closed. “She never leaves me alone.” He sighed.
Time passed quickly and Hugh declined his invitation for dinner, wanting to get home and check on Dylan. It was a ten-minute walk to his house. Being summer, the early evening was mild and still bright, but the roads were empty. As he turned up onto the hill of his drive and looked up to the old farmhouse that he’d called home for most of his life, he could take no clue as to the activity of its occupants. All the windows were dark squares.
He let himself in and walked almost to the stairs before he found any evidence of life. Dylan rushed to greet him from the living room with outstretched arms, but to his dismay, Dylan wasn’t the only voice to meet him.
“Hugh? Is that you?” his mother spoke from the darkened space beyond the door, the curtains still drawn from the previous night.
“Yes.”
“Where have you been? You didn’t tell me you were going out,” she said. Hugh pushed open the door and switched on the light. His mother squinted in her seat.
“How can I tell you things when you’re always asleep?”
“Hugh, will you watch your attitude please? If I had known you wouldn’t be here, I’d have made sure I was up and watching Dylan.”
“You’re supposed to be awake and looking after him all the time. That’s what parents are supposed to do.”
“Stop shouting,” she said, and Hugh could tell by the crumpling of her face that tears were imminent. He hated nothing more.
“I should be able to see some friends if I want to,” he said, his chest feeling hot and tight. He turned to walk out of the room, stepping around Dylan who had been listening. “I’m going out again if you must know. Don’t forget to feed Dylan, by the looks of it you haven’t already,” he called over his shoulder.
Not having taken off his shoes, all he did as he passed through the kitchen was grab an apple from the counter. He stepped into the garden and already felt better than he did inside the gloomy, cluttered confines of the house. He cut a direct route through the long grass to slip under the shade of the woods. It was much quicker without having to check behind him in concern for his young brother. He held an apple by his side; he was sure horses were meant to like them. He’d find out if he found one.
His quick step broke into a steady jog, a sense of urgency taking hold. He hopped over the tree roots that had freed themselves from the ground and encroached on the path, spotting the side trail just as he was about to pass it. He slowed to a walk, trying to steady his breathing and concentrate on his surroundings. The clearing was quiet, still; he studied it for a moment before stepping into the open space. The river was calm, the water tranquil and emitting only the faintest sound where it hit against the grey protrusions of rock. He stopped less than a metre from the edge, seeing nothing except the trees and the dark spaces in between. The low setting sun cast long shadows on the ground, making the trunks appear black. The last light filtering through the oak’s vast spread of leaves like a child’s finger painting made with every shade of green.
He turned from the river and wandered to the left, looking for anything out of place. Movement caught his eye. In the treeline closest to him, a pale shape moved through the foliage with slow, heavy steps. Hugh watched as it came closer, not daring to move. The horse didn’t seem to have noticed him. It stood among the low tangle of ivy with its head lowered to the ground, its thick mass of mane trailing in the dirt. Its coat was smooth and shiny as though wet. Now that he was so near, he could make out the slight dapples of grey that speckled her shoulder and spread across her rump. She was female.
The creature raised her head and looked straight at him. He found himself met with eyes black as obsidian, which appraised him with a surprising sharpness. Her pink nostrils flared to take in his scent, every muscle taut with tension. They faced each other, each trying to discern the other’s intention. He remembered the apple he had brought from the house and held it out in front of him, offering it to the animal that pricked her ears with interest. Feeling encouraged, he approached her slowly, letting his feet ease onto the ground with each step to mute any noise underfoot. He was close enough for her to take the fruit in his outstretched hand. The horse reached her muzzle forward to take in the apple's smell whilst keeping a watchful eye on the boy. He began to relax, but then the horse tossed her head violently skyward and sent him stumbling back beneath the sight of her wild, rolling eyes. The apple fell to the ground with a dull thud and the horse began to calm again, although he could tell she was ready to run.
The horse’s gaze once again morphed from cautious to curious, and feeling brave, Hugh reached a shaky hand to the mid-air that stood in between them. She dropped her head to meet it and the feel of her whiskers surprised him, wiry and coarse. He was also shocked by the icy cool of her breath, that she exhaled in deep huffs as she took in his smell. He pulled his hand back to his side, still watching to see her reaction. Her ears pricked to follow his hand and he smiled as he felt the previous tension dispel.
Close to her now, he placed his palm against her wither, feeling her flinch at his touch. Her coat was cool and had a damp, sticking quality to it. It felt unpleasant, like the outer of an empty dead thing rather than the living, breathing body of such a large animal. Deciding she must be cold, he thought he’d fetch a towel to dry her and so backed away to return to the house. She watched him leave like a quiet omen. He stumbled on the rutted ground as he left the clearing behind, the sun’s reach diminishing now. Once out of the woodland and in the wilderness of his back garden, he sprinted to the back door.
Inside, Dylan was still up. He had eaten but was not in bed. By the time Hugh had taken care of his brother and cleared enough kitchen space to make an adequate snack to sleep on, the sun had fully set. The horse would probably be gone by now, and so with the prospect of hunting around a dark woods not appealing to him, he opted to kick off his trainers in his room and get some rest.
Chapter 4
Hugh stood amongst the moving crowd of excited teenagers, streaming out of their classrooms to leave school for the holidays. He waited, taking the hits of stray, passing elbows until he had space to move. He crossed the corridor and took the single flight of stairs to the top floor. He was just in time; The first door on his right sprung open and released its occupants. When Liana appeared, he took her arm and pulled her to the side.
“Oh, it’s you. What’s up?” she asked with a surprised smile, dismissing her friends.
“Come round mine, there’s something I want to show you.”
“Sure, can I go home and get changed first?”
“Fine,” Hugh replied. “Just text me when you’re there.”
There were too many of her friends around to stay with her. His priority was getting away from the school grounds. At home, he found Dylan dressed and getting creative with his pens. His mother was in bed. He changed out of his uniform and heard his phone go off. Dylan followed him as he raced back down the stairs, wanting to go with him, but Hugh instructed him to stay, reassuring him they would play his choice of board game when he was back.
He met her at the top of the drive where behind the house it opened up to a small concrete space lined with rusting junk and dilapidated outbuildings that stored the shells of equipment long forgotten. She had changed into frayed denim shorts and a pale, bohemian style vest. Her long, honey coloured hair hung free by her shoulders.
He led her through the narrow passage that took them past the back door and into the grassland beyond.
“We’re heading out back?” she asked.
“Yeah, to the woods.”
“Oh, right,” she said, trying to keep up with him. “How’s your mum? And your brother, he was so small when I last saw him, he must be grown big now.”
“Yeah, he’s growing fast.” He had no intention of inviting her in to the house. He was concentrating on the route through the grass.’
“So I guess I’ll see for myself whatever it is you want to show me.”
“Hopefully,” he said. “If she’s there.”
He led her to the clearing, both having to watch where they put their feet. Liana watched as Hugh paced first to one side, then the other. He listened. She watched him go to the river’s edge, the toe of his sneaker almost contacting the water as he seemed to study the opposite bank. The thick growth of trees made it hard to get a clear view of any distance. After a minute he turned back to her and sat on the ground. She joined him, trying not to think about getting dirt on her new shorts.
“She’s not here,” he stated. Liana’s brow furrowed.
“Who’s not here?”
“There was a white horse here. I saw her the other day when I came with Dylan. Last night she was here again, I touched her.”
“That’s weird; you don’t get wild horses round here. Maybe it’s escaped or something. It’s got to belong to someone.”
“You know about horses?” he asked.
“Yeah, I used to ride.”
“Do you know if they like apples?” Liana looked bemused.
“Yes, of course.” Hugh was quiet for a moment, pulling at a stray patch of grass by his shoe. He remembered the horse’s reaction to the apple he’d offered the previous night. “Maybe it’ll show up if we wait a while.” Hugh squinted at the bank, the dirt bare and undisturbed.
“I don’t think so. I don’t think it’s coming back. ”
They sat in companionable silence for a few minutes, both mulling over the day and waiting to see if anything would join them.
“Have you heard about the party next Friday?” Liana said. “You should come, it’ll be good. I know Kain’s going.”
“Maybe.” He shrugged. “If I’m free, then I’ll consider it.”
“Come on, you never come out to anything. You’d probably enjoy getting out and socialising for once.” He looked at her.
“It’s not a priority of mine to get flat wasted in the company of strangers.”
“I’ll be there,” she said. He got to his feet, easing the cramp from his legs.
“Remind me nearer the time. I can’t promise.”
Back at the house, they came through the alleyway and paused by the door. She paused as if waiting for something, and he realised that social norms would expect him to invite her in. He stepped towards the drive, his hands deep in his pockets.
“I’ll see you around then,” he said. Liana took his cue and left, pulling out her phone as she set out to walk back to her own home.
He met Dylan inside, and after some food he made good on his promise to play board games. He let him stay up for an extra hour then both boys went to bed, although it was another three before Hugh resigned to sleep.
The first week of the holidays passed with the exact monotony expected by Hugh, because really it was the same as any other time the law didn’t require him to be out of the house. At least in the initial first days there was some novelty in getting to sleep in and take his time to dress in the morning. Dylan loved nothing more than having Hugh’s company in sitting through the day’s entire cartoon showings in their pyjamas, shielded from the ever brightening sun outside by the drawn curtains of the living room. The dimness hid the mess they sat in.
His thoughts rarely touched upon his encounter with the strange horse in the woods. He just assumed she’d left after her absence when he’d waited with Liana, and he’d been spending an increased amount of time thinking about the upcoming party in the quiet moments he had to himself. It surprised him to entertain the idea, but after a week of days that merged into one another, confined within the house or its immediate area, the prospect of going out and spending time with people his own age became more and more tempting. His mother had been at a low ebb of functioning since the break from school. Most days he only saw her in the evenings when she’d take an hour to drink a single cup of tea and form a coherent word let alone function on any practical level. Despite this, she had made a few shopping trips and the house had food, so they had avoided any arguments.
Friday came and Hugh read over and re-read the details Liana had sent him via text. The clock told him it was just past nine which gave him forty minutes to get changed and walk to the house in the estate where it was happening. He held his phone in his right hand, his finger hovering over the reply button. She had messaged him yesterday after he told her he’d come along, but he’d heard nothing from her since. He threw open the doors of his wardrobe, all his regular clothes were in various states of disarray around his room but he was looking for an item of clothing he hadn’t worn since his aunt’s wedding two years previous. It was on a lone hanger on the far left side of the rail. He picked out the light blue shirt and tried it on. It was tighter than he would prefer but he thought it passable. It was the only thing clean and ironed at any rate. He swapped his joggers for the least worn pair of jeans on his floor and thought he looked suitable as long as nobody paid too close attention.
He crossed the landing to his mother’s room, throwing open the door to find her wrapped up with the duvet that had tangled around her legs like an oversized, beige cocoon.
“Mum,” he said. “Mum wake up. I’m going out.” His mother didn’t move from her position, although his voice reached her ears from the rectangle of light at the doorway. Hugh resigned himself to the fact that she wasn’t going to get up. He had not the energy or inclination to try to change the fact. He turned and left, leaving the door open to allow a better chance of her hearing Dylan if he needed her.
Downstairs his younger brother was full of questions when he noticed Hugh’s change of clothes. He told him he’d be out seeing friends for a bit and put on Dylan’s favourite Spy Dogs DVD to keep him entertained. With one last check of his phone he could leave the house, stepping outside into the mild but breezy evening with a fresh wave of excitement. At least he thought it was excitement at first. Within a moment’s pause for consideration, the wind had turned biting and the sky seemed turbulent. He thought of the drinking, the girls, the banter and the loud, pulsing music that would beat so loud that it seemed to vibrate through your very blood. His lungs compressed and his heart shifted up a gear. He knew that if he did not set out to the party now, he would not go. If he was honest with himself, he didn’t want to; but the door was shut behind him and he wanted less to go back inside. He needed time for himself.
He got moving, and once the house was out of sight behind him and his arms were swinging free at his sides as he passed through the dark, empty streets, he didn’t feel half bad. He guessed it was exhilaration that made his heart race and emboldened him, although when he got near to the house and saw the crowd of youths his age and older spilling out of the door and milling around the entrance, it exited down and through his feet, dissipating into the night and taking all his confidence with it.
His phone went off in his hand and the sudden noise made him jump. It was a text from Liana asking if he was still coming. He read it without opening it and then locked his screen, keeping it in his hand. A sudden painful self-awareness struck as a multitude of eyes locked on him. They all looked the same stood in the dim glow from the house’s windows. It was a small semi; the garden was a scruff of land and the path was hazardous, but he crossed it without tripping and found himself at the doorway with no other option but to push past the black-clad people who had left only a slip of space for him to gain entry.
He paused, wondering if he should instead perhaps ask them to move, but his voice was still hidden away beyond retrieval. He turned side on and squeezed through the small gap, brushing against someone’s shoulder as he did.
“Hey. Watch it.” He heard a deep voice say in his right ear and what seemed to be a great cloud of acrid cigarette smoke washed over him, scorching the top of his throat in his next two breaths. He shuffled away, looking around for anyone he knew, but the house was disorienting and full of unfriendly faces. He heard a commotion coming from the large room to his left. He was looking for Liana and to his relief he saw her. She had been gazing in the door's direction as he entered. Her face lit up, and she rushed toward him.
