Once Upon a Rose, page 11
But Beatrice didn't feel the urge to go talk to Dietrich. She wanted to talk to Alexander.
After Guinevere left, she took a deep breath, made her way to the adjoining door, and knocked. She waited for his muffled “come in” before she opened the door and entered, suddenly shy, even though she’d done the same thing the night before.
“Are you well?” Alexander asked. He was already sitting in bed, the covers tucked around his waist.
“I was hoping to talk to you,” Beatrice said, looking away from his bare chest.
It was the first time she had ever entered a man’s bedroom for the express purpose of talking to him, and she wasn't sure what to say or what to do or where to go.
“Come sit,” Alexander said, patting the bed beside him.
Beatrice glanced sideways at the bed.
“We don’t have to fall asleep,” Alexander said with a grin. “I will help you stay awake, but it will be easier to talk if you’re not standing across the room.”
So Beatrice crossed the room and gingerly sat down on the bed next to her husband. He reached over to take the blanket placed on the table beside his bed and give it to her. Had he put it within reach in case she visited him?
The adjoining door snicked open, and an orange kitten padded through from Beatrice’s room, hopping up onto the bed and settling in Beatrice’s lap with a contented purr.
“Are you going to transform?” Beatrice asked her, “or do you prefer to purr as a kitten right now?”
Rose turned into a dragon in an instant but continued to purr.
“Was she a kitten or a dragon when you found her?” Beatrice asked.
“A dragon,” Alexander said. “She looked so tiny and pitiful and cold, surrounded by broken pieces of a green shell, and I knew I had to do something to help her. I had no idea what to do with a baby dragon, but thankfully, she transformed into a kitten before I got her into the house. I could only hope that her kitten insides were the same as her dragon parts and that she would be able to digest milk. Mrs. Jenkins was more than happy to oblige. I think she was happy to see me find a friend, even if it was only a kitten.”
“They seem to care for you very much,” Beatrice said.
Alexander reached over to pet Rose, and his fingers brushed against Beatrice’s. “They were the closest thing I had to parents after I lost mine,” he said. “I don’t know what I would have done without them, but I would not be the man that I am today.”
“I’m very thankful that you had them,” Beatrice said. “I happen to be partial to the man you are today.”
Alexander let out a sound that could maybe be described as a chuckle. “I should hope so, given that you married me.”
“Did I have a choice?” Beatrice asked, bumping his arm with her shoulder.
“Absolutely,” Alexander said, his voice turning completely serious. “You had the choice, and I would never have pressured you to change your mind if you had turned me down. I will admit, though, that I’m glad that you didn’t,” he added, his voice turning a little less serious. “It’s been lovely having someone who knows my secret, and it hasn’t even been a day. I can’t begin to tell you how much weight it has taken off me to know that I am not alone.”
“Well, you’ll never be alone again for the rest of your life.”
“However long it may be,” he said glumly.
Beatrice shook her head. “We are not thinking like that,” she said. “We are going to figure this out, and we will protect you from him.”
“I’m more concerned with protecting you,” Alexander said. “You didn't go into this with the full knowledge of what you were entering into, and I am not going to place importance on my life over yours.”
Beatrice looked at him with emotion warring on her face. “I would rather not be mistress of Eldenwilde without you,” she said after a moment, “but hopefully it won’t come to that. I am still hopeful that we will discover a way to break your curse so you can tell me anything else you might know. Then we will find a way to prevent him from hurting you for already being married.”
She sighed. “But I didn’t want to talk about that tonight. I wanted to talk about other things and pretend for a moment that we are not a couple who married not out of necessity, but because we actually like each other.”
“Not that I don’t like you,” she added hastily, her eyes widening. “But perhaps we could pretend to be a normal couple for an evening.”
What was she doing? She was bungling this terribly.
“What does a normal couple do?” Alexander asked.
“I was hoping you would know,” Beatrice admitted. “My mother left when I was only a baby, and my father has been gone more often than not ever since. I had a good example of a mother in Dietrich’s mother, but his father died not long after I moved in with them. So I’ve never really had a model of what marriage should look like.”
Alexander thought for a moment before he shrugged. “I know something we could try,” he said, “if you’re willing.”
Beatrice glanced at him, narrowing her eyes. “What exactly do I have to be willing to try?”
“We could play the game I used to play.”
“What kind of game?” Beatrice asked. “Do married couples really play games?”
Alexander shrugged again. “We’ve already established that neither of us knows what we’re doing, so we might as well do something fun. And I don’t know about you, but I could certainly use the distraction right about now.”
Beatrice admitted that a distraction sounded like a good plan. “What sort of game is it?” she asked.
Alexander sprang out of bed and made his way to the wardrobe. He opened a drawer and rummaged for a moment before pulling a wooden box from the bottom.
“It’s about running your own estate,” he explained as he came back to the bed.
“That sounds…fun,” Beatrice said, wincing a little bit. “This is what you did in your free time growing up?”
Alexander laughed. “Yes. My version of free time is probably not much like yours, but I think it’s fun, and I think you might also. It seems like the sort of thing you would enjoy.”
“If that’s what you would like to do, I don’t have a problem with that. But you’ll have to teach me how to play.”
“I can do that,” Alexander said with a grin. It was the most excited Beatrice had ever seen him, like he had reverted to childhood again, and it was adorable to watch. He dumped out the game pieces and opened up a piece of fabric with a pattern stitched into it.
“How exactly do you play?” she asked.
“It’s simple,” he said, before launching into one of the most convoluted descriptions Beatrice had ever heard. She stared at him blankly as he began putting pieces in front of her. “It’s easier to play than it is to understand,” he admitted. “You’ll figure it out, and I’ll help you, although I might beat you.”
“I’m sure you will,” Beatrice said with a laugh. “In fact, if you don’t, I will be incredibly surprised and maybe a little disappointed in your skills as lord of the estate.”
“If you win, it will be luck,” Alexander said confidently as he continued to lay out pieces in front of her.
Beatrice leaned forward to inspect the pattern stitched into the fabric—it clearly had something to do with the game—and Rose squirmed out of her lap and settled on the bed in front of her instead. “I’m sorry,” Beatrice said, shaking her head at the dragon, “did you not like being squished?”
The dragon let out a disgruntled chirp and Beatrice chuckled. “Terribly sorry, I’ll pet you more when we’re done.”
The candles were beginning to burn low by the time they finished their game, and surprisingly, Beatrice was the winner.
“How did you do that?” Alexander asked, staring at the board incredulously. “I didn’t think you would beat me.”
“I didn’t either,” Beatrice admitted with a giddy laugh, “but it feels great.”
Alexander was a little put out, staring at the game with a grumpy expression. “I can’t believe you beat me,” he said. “Please don’t tell Jenkins. He will never let me hear the end of it. He had to play me more than once, and I always beat him.”
“Then I shall be sure to tell him first thing in the morning,” Beatrice teased.
Alexander groaned and pushed his extra pieces off his lap with a huff. “You must have cheated somehow,” he said. “I’m going to look at the rules again.”
He reached for the book inside the wooden box and began flipping through it.
“I’ve never even heard of this game before—how could I have cheated?” Beatrice said with a grin. “You don’t actually think I cheated.”
“No,” he said with a sigh. “One of the reasons I chose you is because I knew that you would always do the right thing.”
Alexander had paid enough attention to her to notice that? She didn’t realize he’d been so aware of her. “How do you know that?” she asked.
“Because I was willing to give you more pay when I first started the library, and you told me to use that money to pay for schoolbooks for the school instead.”
Beatrice smiled at the memory. She remembered that, though she was surprised he did. “And that’s the reason you chose to marry me?” she teased. “Because I wouldn’t let you pay me enough money?”
Rose noticed that they were done playing and climbed back into Beatrice’s lap, rubbing her head under Beatrice’s wrist.
“Did you need more?” he asked.
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “I didn’t need more. I already had more than enough.”
“I still think I should have paid you more.” Alexander shrugged. “But I wasn’t going to lose you by insisting on paying you more than you would take.”
Beatrice smiled. “I wonder how the library is getting on without me,” she said.
“Well, you told me who to put in charge of it,” he said. “So I did that, and I’m sure it’s getting along well. Besides, even if it wasn’t, you don’t have to worry about it anymore.”
“If you think I’m going to stop worrying about my library simply because I married you,” she said, “you’re wrong. It will always be my library. In fact, it may be even more my library now than it was before.”
“I could agree with that statement,” he said, “but I’m afraid you’ll have to give it up for now. Perhaps someday we’ll find a way for you to take it over again.”
“I hope so,” Beatrice said with a smile, thinking back to cool winter evenings snuggled up near the fire with a book in her lap. “Although your library here is a pretty good substitute.”
“I should hope so,” Alexander said.
Rose purred from Beatrice’s lap as Alexander picked up the game pieces and put them back in the wooden box. Beatrice studied her husband’s face, noting the worry lines etched near his eyes and the way he had suddenly deflated. “We will figure it out, Alexander,” she said quietly. “I promise.”
She impulsively reached for his hand, catching it in hers and giving it a squeeze. When she went to let go, Alexander didn’t. “Thank you,” he said, and those words meant more than any words she’d heard before.
Chapter seventeen
Alexander
As Alexander stood in the foyer and waited for his wife to come down the stairs, he took a deep breath.
Her father should be home from his travels by now. So while he was bringing Beatrice home to get her things, he was also potentially meeting his father-in-law for the first time.
The thought should not have rattled him. He was a lord, and Beatrice's father was merely a trader, but the idea of meeting his wife's father made him twitchy and he wasn't sure what to do with that.
Beatrice hadn’t said much about her father, but she’d hinted that he wasn’t a particularly kind man, and something in Alexander wanted to grind him to a pulp for even potentially mistreating Beatrice.
What kind of man could have a daughter like Beatrice and not make her the center of his entire world?
And from what he'd gathered, the man had been leaving her alone for most of her life. He probably should have asked Beatrice for more details instead of snooping, but he’d discussed it with Dietrich. He’d found out just how often Beatrice had been with Dietrich and his mother while her father continued working and pretending she didn’t exist.
Alexander had never particularly considered having children, but if he ever had a daughter with a smile like Beatrice's, there was no way in the world that he would be able to leave her for that long.
His thoughts were interrupted by a noise at the top of the stairs as his wife began to descend. The corner of Alexander's mouth started to turn up at the sight of her. She was wearing one of his mother's simpler gray dresses, probably in an attempt to appear less grand in front of her father and the folks in town. Knowing her, she wouldn't want to appear as if she was lording her new status over them, and he admired her for it.
But even in a simple dress, she looked stunning.
“Are you ready, my lady?” he asked her as she reached the ground. He held out an arm to steady her, just in case she fell. For some reason, she was prone to falling around him.
“I am ready,” she said, with one of her smiles that instantly made him want to give her anything in the world.
Why did she have such an effect on him? It blew his mind that he could be so enamored of her when they had only just gotten married.
This wasn't normal, was it? It couldn't be.
But as Jenkins opened the door and ushered Beatrice out to the waiting carriage, he couldn't help wondering if maybe it was like this for everyone. If these feelings were the reason why so many people loved being married.
His parents had had a good marriage. Not that he'd particularly cared to notice when he was a young man, but he had never seen them speak harshly to one another, much like Mr. and Mrs. Jenkins. It seemed as if he’d had two good examples of being married, but that didn't mean he wanted to fall in love with his wife.
On the contrary, the thought of opening up to Beatrice the way his parents had been in love with each other was terrifying. Surely he could have a more neutral marriage, one in which they respected each other and cared for each other, but not one where his wife would be willing to die for him.
That seemed a step too far, and yet, it was dangerously close to his reality.
He settled into the carriage next to Beatrice, their shoulders brushing. Perhaps he should have sat across from her, but sharing warmth was a good reason to sit next to her.
It wasn’t as if he was looking for reasons to be close to his wife…but maybe, just maybe, he was.
He could pretend that he wasn’t, but if he was being honest with himself, he knew that there was nothing he wanted more than to sit next to Beatrice and hold her hand.
But holding her hand seemed like reaching too far.
What if she tried to hold his, though?
The drive to town seemed to take far less time than it usually did. Not that he went to town often; he knew what the rumors were—that he was standoffish and didn’t like people—but he had never had much reason to go to town.
The nobility didn’t spend much time there except for the festivals, and a big bonfire didn’t hold any appeal for him for obvious reasons.
But going to town with his wife felt different. It felt like he was a part of something because she was a part of something there, and he was looking forward to meeting all the people who were important to her in her life.
Except her father.
“I thought we could start at your home and collect your things,” Alexander said.
Beatrice smiled up at him. “That sounds like a plan,” she said. “I would love to introduce you to my father. He should meet you.”
“Yes,” Alexander muttered. He would not love to meet her father, but he had no choice.
It would probably be good to meet him though, even if only to cement the fact that he didn’t like him and to put a face to the name he knew too much about. There was something to be said for knowing the person you didn’t like.
The corner of Alexander's mouth tilted up in a smirk. Perhaps it was wrong of him to be so prejudiced against his father-in-law before he’d even met him, but he had never been one to think the best of everyone. Gerald Montgomery had never had his good opinion and most likely never would.
But he would tolerate the man for Beatrice’s sake, if that’s what she wanted.
As they hit the northern edge of town, Alexander tried to think about the last time he had been into town himself. He didn't go often—in fact, he hadn't been in years. The idea of being around so many people did not seem appealing when he had no idea what their intentions were.
A lovely side effect of your parents being murdered.
No, he had no reason to be around others.
There was a lump in his throat as he watched the houses roll by. Maybe he shouldn't have come. Perhaps it would have been better for Beatrice if he hadn’t come.
He was starting to feel nauseated, and they hadn't even gotten out of the carriage yet.
What would happen if he threw up in front of everyone in town? The last thing he wanted, in addition to freaking out, was to be humiliated.
He could always stay in the carriage and let Beatrice go alone.
But no, that was cowardly.
He had come with his wife for a reason. At some point, he would have to join the townsfolk again. He couldn't remain a hermit for the rest of his life. Even if he wanted to, it was not an option—especially not now that he was married and had a wife who was from the town.
She deserved to have a husband who was able to meet her friends without having a panic attack. Even if he wasn't sure he could be that husband for her.
He started breathing a little harder as they rode past the mayor's home and toward the center of town. He still recognized it, which surprised him. Things hadn’t changed much.
