River, page 16
“Yes, and I’ll feel like it was my fault.” Flaxfoot rested his tail for a moment on Sunbeam’s shoulder. “It’s because I was careless that the stupid thing fell in there in the first place.”
“The Clan won’t starve for the loss of one pigeon,” Snowbird pointed out.
“I said I would do it,” Sunbeam hissed. She was desperate to do something, and she had no patience to wait for approval from her Clanmates.
Without any more delay, Sunbeam flattened herself onto her belly and crawled into the bramble thicket, trying to wriggle her way forward where the tendrils were thinnest. She could feel the thorns catching in her fur, but she kept going until she could grasp the pigeon’s wing in her jaws.
But when Sunbeam tried to retreat, creeping backward and dragging the pigeon with her, the thorns dug deeper, raking through her fur and over the flesh beneath.
Maybe the others were right, she thought. But it’s too late to change my mind. I just have to get out of here.
More determined than ever, she tugged harder at the pigeon, ignoring the countless stabs of pain from the thorns. The tendrils twined around her, almost as if they were alive and she were their prey. But finally she emerged, staggered to her paws, and turned to drop the pigeon in front of Flaxfoot.
“There you go,” she meowed. “You’re welcome.”
Her Clanmates simply stared at her in dismay, jaws gaping. Sunbeam realized that she must look as if she had bees in her brain. Her pelt was scraped the wrong way, she was covered in scratches, and she had left enough of her fur behind in the thicket to line a nest.
“What?” she asked.
When there was still no response, she turned and padded away.
Almost at once she realized that Snowbird and Gullswoop had followed her, and were escorting her, one on either side.
“You’re going straight back to camp,” Snowbird ordered, in a tone that defied argument. “You need the medicine cats to look at those scratches.”
“What about collecting our prey?” Sunbeam asked.
“Whorlpelt and the others will do that,” the white she-cat responded.
“Yes, you’ve got to take care of yourself, after what you’ve been through the last few days,” Gullswoop added, curling her tail around Sunbeam’s neck. “You know you’re only making things worse.”
Her unwanted sympathy shattered the last of Sunbeam’s patience. “Keep your tail to yourself!” she snapped.
“Sor-reeeee.” Gullswoop sprang backward, sounding not sorry at all. “I was only trying to help.”
Sunbeam ignored her. She stalked back into camp with her head held high. When she reached the medicine cats’ den, she quite enjoyed the startled look Shadowsight gave her as he looked up from the herb store.
“What happened?” he asked. “Did a fox attack you?”
“No, she attacked a bramble bush,” Snowbird told him, an edge to her voice. “She insisted on burrowing in to retrieve a pigeon that fell in there. Come on, Gullswoop. We’re done here.”
When her Clanmates left, Sunbeam sat down and waited while Shadowsight examined her, sniffing carefully at her scratches. By now they were really starting to hurt, and she could feel blood trickling through her pelt.
I wish I could have done something daring and reckless that didn’t sting so much, she thought ruefully.
“You know, this is the most mouse-brained thing I’ve seen in moons,” Shadowsight told her when he had finished examining her. “If you’re unlucky, these scratches could become infected, and the infection could kill you. Do you really want to die in such an awful, embarrassing way?”
Shadowsight was usually so gentle that Sunbeam was startled by his fierce tone. “I didn’t—” she began.
“Didn’t think?” Shadowsight interrupted, glaring at her. “No, I can see that. In the future, remember that medicine cats have enough to do treating wounds that weren’t deliberate, never mind sorting out mouse-brained cats who injure themselves for fun!”
Guilt swept over Sunbeam like a cold wind from the lake. “I’m sorry,” she mewed.
“I should think so!” Shadowsight snorted. More calmly, he went on, “I know you’re having a bad time, but injuring yourself is not the answer. Sit still, and I’ll put some damp moss on your back to soothe the pain. Then I’ll fetch some fresh marigold leaves and trickle the juice into those scratches. And for StarClan’s sake, Sunbeam, don’t ever do this again!”
When the medicine cat had left her with the cool moisture from the moss soaking into her fur, Sunbeam sat in silence, relaxing as the pain ebbed. Then, for the first time, she remembered that she wasn’t the only cat recovering in the medicine cats’ den.
Blazefire!
The white-and-ginger tom was watching her curiously from his nest at the far side of the den. Between the shadows in the den and concentrating on her own injuries, Sunbeam hadn’t noticed him before.
She stared at him, suddenly feeling stupid for having injured herself, not to mention how she must look with clumps of fur missing and moss sticking to her back.
“Those scratches must be really painful,” Blazefire remarked after a moment. “Whatever possessed you to go into the brambles?”
“I don’t owe you an explanation,” Sunbeam snapped at him, turning her head away. “I don’t owe you anything!”
“I know,” Blazefire mewed quietly.
Silence fell; after a few heartbeats, Sunbeam couldn’t resist glancing up at him again. “How is your leg?” she asked.
“It’s too soon to tell,” Blazefire replied with a sigh. “I can’t move it. Shadowsight gives me poppy seeds for the pain, but they make me sleepy.”
In spite of all that had happened between them, Sunbeam couldn’t help feeling worried for him. “What will you do if your leg doesn’t heal right?” She found it was hard to keep her voice steady. “You might have trouble walking for the rest of your life.”
Blazefire gave an uneasy shrug. “I suppose I’ll deal with that when and if it happens. But yes, when I’m awake, it does prey on my mind.”
Sunbeam fought off a surge of irritation mingled with compassion. I shouldn’t care so much, but I do. “Maybe you should have been a bit more careful,” she told him.
Blazefire gave her injuries a long, thoughtful look. “I could say the same to you,” he meowed.
Sunbeam almost let out a mrrow of amusement, until she remembered that things weren’t right between her and Blazefire. Instead she turned away.
“But you’re right about one thing,” Blazefire continued. “I could have been much more careful with you. I can tell you’re hurting, and you don’t deserve that.”
Once again, silence fell.
After a few heartbeats, Sunbeam summoned all her courage to ask, “Do you love Lightleap now?”
“No!” Blazefire sounded surprised. “There’s a lot I admire about Lightleap, but we’re just friends. I hope you and I can be friends, too, Sunbeam.”
Relief warmed Sunbeam to the tips of her claws, and the pain around her heart eased a little. Somehow she was better able to bear losing Blazefire if it wasn’t because he was padding after Lightleap. “Maybe we can,” she mewed.
After a while, Blazefire’s soft, rhythmic snores sounded throughout the den, and Sunbeam was able to relax. What would it be like to be Blazefire’s friend again? she wondered. Maybe if he’s just friends with Lightleap, there’s hope for us in the future.
Sunbeam was dozing when she was roused by the sound of another cat entering the den. She opened her eyes expecting to see Shadowsight, but the newcomer was her mother, Berryheart. Sunbeam braced herself for another scolding. To her mother, being a productive ShadowClan warrior was a very big deal. Her mother had left ShadowClan as a young cat to follow Darktail and his Kin, and she’d lost everything, including her kit, Needletail. It was only by chance that Tigerheart found Berryheart and Sparrowtail on his way back to the lake territories with Dovewing and their kits, and their family was folded back into ShadowClan when it revived under Tigerstar’s leadership. Sunbeam and her littermates had been born on that journey. Berryheart told them often how important it was to serve their Clan—to use good judgment, follow the rules, and contribute to the prey pile.
I failed on two out of three this time!
Berryheart paused for a moment, gazing across at Blazefire’s snoring form, then padded forward to sit at Sunbeam’s side. To Sunbeam’s surprise, her voice was gentle.
“I don’t blame you one bit for acting out like you did. That family—all of Tigerstar’s kin think they can do whatever they like.”
Sunbeam had never expected to hear that from her mother. To Berryheart, respect for their leader was part of being a good ShadowClan warrior. “What do you mean?” she asked.
“It’s not important,” Berryheart responded, obviously regretting that she had said so much. “Just something that’s been on my mind.”
But Sunbeam was desperate for something to distract her from the pain of her injuries and the whole mess with Blazefire and Lightleap. “Please, tell me,” she pleaded.
Thoughtfully, Berryheart licked a forepaw, then drew it over her ear. “It’s all this talk of changing the code,” she mewed at last, “when it’s cats like Tigerstar and Dovewing who will benefit the most. Obviously, I’m not Ashfur,” she continued. “He went much too far in his obsession with the code. But sometimes I think too many cats aren’t all that trustworthy, and when that happens, the code is there to help them do the right thing.” She broke off suddenly. “I’m sorry—I’m rambling,” she finished.
“I think I understand,” Sunbeam told her, giving her mother an affectionate lick around her ear.
Her mother’s sympathy felt nice. And Berryheart had given her plenty to think about. Lightleap hadn’t betrayed her by becoming mates with Blazefire, in the way she had assumed at first, but it had still been a betrayal to convince Blazefire to take such a risk for no reason. And it was a betrayal of the whole Clan to weaken it by encouraging a warrior to risk injury. Could Lightleap still be called a trustworthy cat?
Sunbeam heaved a deep sigh. Should I have been a better friend to Lightleap? Should I have made her understand how important the warrior code is? She seems ready to set her paws on a dark path. Was there anything I could have done to make a difference?
Chapter 19
As Flamepaw leaped from the end of the tree-bridge and trudged up the slope toward the center of the Gathering island, he could feel every hair on his pelt bristling with a mixture of rage and misery. He wasn’t sure he wanted to be around his own Clanmates, let alone cats from all the other Clans.
When he had been chosen to come to the Gathering, his first thought had been to refuse. But Sparkpelt and Lilyheart wouldn’t take no for an answer, so all Flamepaw could do was grit his teeth and hope it would be over quickly. Bile rose in his belly and a bitter taste filled his mouth as he remembered his second failed assessment and how he would be ridiculed yet again for not having his warrior name.
I’ll keep my eyes open for those apprentices from last time. I’m not sitting anywhere near them!
He cast a hopeful glance up at the sky, but the clouds that had covered it earlier had cleared away, and the moon floated serenely above the trees. There was no sign that StarClan might be angry and draw the Gathering to an early close.
All Flamepaw wanted was to go off by himself and brood about how unfairly his Clan was treating him. The sooner the Gathering was over, the sooner he could do that.
He pushed his way through the bushes in the paw steps of his Clanmates and flopped down in a shadowy spot as far away from the others as he could get. He didn’t want to join them in greeting friends from other Clans and settling down to exchange gossip.
I don’t have any friends.
Tigerstar, Harestar, and Leafstar were already perched on branches in the Great Oak; Bramblestar swiftly crossed the clearing and leaped up to take his own place. Only the RiverClan cats were missing.
Time dragged on; several cats were beginning to shift uneasily and cast glances in the direction of the tree-bridge. The leaders in the Great Oak were obviously consulting one another. Finally, as Harestar rose to his paws to begin the Gathering without them, a waft of RiverClan scent came from the lake, and the first of their cats began to appear from the bushes.
“About time!” some cat exclaimed loudly.
But as the RiverClan cats found places for themselves in the clearing, Flamepaw noticed that Mistystar wasn’t with them. Their deputy, Reedwhisker, was missing, too; the cat who leaped up into the Great Oak to join the leaders was Mothwing.
Weird, Flamepaw thought, and so not fair! If a Clan leader can’t be bothered to show up to a Gathering, why do I have to be here? I’m not even a warrior yet.
At least, Flamepaw reflected, Mothwing didn’t seem any happier to be there than he was himself.
“Mistystar and Reedwhisker can’t be here tonight,” she announced with a nervous nod to the Clan leaders. “RiverClan is dealing with an outbreak of whitecough.” An anxious rumble greeted her words from the cats in the clearing, and Mothwing hastened to add to what she had said. “We have it under control, and everything will be fine. There’s nothing to worry about.”
Alderheart rose from where he was sitting with the other medicine cats. “Do you need any help, Mothwing?” he asked. “I could come over and bring some extra catmint with me.”
“Thank you, Alderheart,” Mothwing responded with a polite dip of her head, “but it isn’t necessary. We’d rather cope with it on our own, and we have plenty of catmint from the gardens in the Twolegplace.”
Alderheart dipped his head in return and sat down again.
Flamepaw thought that Mothwing looked grateful when Harestar stepped forward on his branch and announced that the Gathering would begin.
“Bramblestar,” the WindClan leader meowed, “would you like to start us off with news from ThunderClan?”
Gazing upward, Flamepaw saw his Clan leader give a start, as if his mind had been somewhere else altogether. His eyes were unfocused as he rose, and a few heartbeats passed before he spoke.
“Everything is fine in ThunderClan.”
Harestar tilted his head to one side. “Maybe it’s because of that tasty shrew WindClan sent over,” he suggested.
Crowfeather, who was sitting on the roots of the Great Oak with the other Clan deputies, let out a mrrow of laughter, echoed by more of the WindClan cats. Bramblestar simply blinked in confusion; clearly he had no idea what all that was about.
Flamepaw cast a curious look at Squirrelflight. Has she still not told Bramblestar about our trip to WindClan to remind them about the rules over borders?
From the filthy look Squirrelflight gave Crowfeather, he guessed that she had not. Now she jumped to her paws and announced clearly, “Prey is running well in ThunderClan. We have all we need to eat.”
Harestar narrowed his eyes at Squirrelflight with a curious tilt of his head. He seemed to realize that she was covering for her Clan leader, drawing attention away from his bewilderment. Turning to Bramblestar, he asked, “Is there any other news from ThunderClan?”
Flamepaw was aware of cats from the other Clans turning to look at him. This was the moment he had dreaded, because if he had been made a warrior, this was when his leader would announce it. But Bramblestar just shook his head and stepped back.
Fixing his gaze on the ground, Flamepaw dug his claws into the earth. He wanted to lash out at some cat, to screech at Bramblestar or Squirrelflight about the unfairness of it all. But even in his tumult of emotions, he knew that would only make things worse.
Is this why Squirrelflight made me come? he asked himself. Maybe she thinks I need a good shaming, as if I failed because I didn’t work hard enough.
Then he heard Squirrelflight clear her throat. “ThunderClan has no more news to report,” she meowed, “but I’m sure we will soon.”
Flamepaw bared his teeth in a snarl. Yeah, Squirrelflight—that’s so helpful!
Tigerstar spoke next, launching into some complicated story about a new kittypet in the Twoleg den on ShadowClan territory, and Flamepaw was no longer the center of attention. But he could still sense that some cats were casting him pitying looks. His embarrassment and shame swelled within him until he thought it would consume him completely, but just when he thought he couldn’t bear it anymore, Harestar raised his voice to make his own announcement.
“At the last half-moon, all our medicine cats went to the Moonpool and walked in dreams with StarClan, to present them our ideas about changes to the code. I’m sure each medicine cat has reported to their own Clan, but I have been chosen to make the announcement here at the Gathering.”
He paused, letting his gaze travel around the clearing; every cat’s attention was firmly focused on him. Even Flamepaw looked up and pricked his ears to listen.
“As you probably realize,” the WindClan leader went on, “StarClan has approved our ideas, and so now I announce that from this moment, these changes will be added to the warrior code.”
A murmur of many voices rose from the crowd of cats in the clearing. Flamepaw half expected protests, especially from the warriors who had argued against the changes, but every cat seemed to realize that the time for protest was past.
“Because of this, I have another announcement to make,” Harestar continued. “The WindClan warrior Fernstripe has decided to leave our Clan, and join ThunderClan to be with Shellfur. I’m not happy about the thought of losing one of our warriors, but we all agreed to this change in the code about relationships between different Clans, so I can’t deny her request. They will face the challenges that the Clans have agreed to, and let that decide the outcome.”
Once more a murmur rose from the cats in the clearing, part shock, part approval, but almost at once Leafstar’s voice cut through it.
“I have also received a request, from Fringewhisker,” the SkyClan leader announced. “She has asked to leave SkyClan and join ShadowClan because she wants to be with Spireclaw.”
