Rescuing Kaye: A Special Forces Protector Romantic Suspense Novel, page 10
Whatever the reason, I need to pack up those memories and shove them in a deep dark hole in the farthest recesses of my mind.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to over share.” My molars grind together as I try to force the memories away. “But you inspire me because you want to help animals. Not hurt them, like I did.”
“Don’t be sorry. Thank you for sharing that with me.” She’s sincere in her words and what she says resonates powerfully with me.
“If you need any help, when it comes to Scott, if things go south with him, I’m here if you need someone to talk to, or someone to beat Scott to a bloody pulp.”
“Oh please…” A smile warms her face. “No beating anyone to a pulp, bloody or not, but thank you for offering. I just need to figure out how to deal with him, once and for all.”
And I’ll be right by your side.
At least, I’d like to think she might want me there.
Until she asks, or Scott forces my hand, I’ll wait for her to come to me.
She turns to face me and a million emotions swim through her troubled gaze. It feels like ages, that we stand together, as if time no longer exists.
The wind kicks up, sending waves of chilly air across the rooftop. The sun sets in a spectacular riot of colors. Dark blues merge with fiery oranges. Those blues drift to deep purples and eventually the inky blackness of night lays claim to the world below.
The city lights up, attempting to push back the darkness, and comes alive as people continue on with their lives.
A wave of warmth spreads over me when Kaye closes the gap between us until only inches remain. I almost think she’s about ready to lift on tiptoe and kiss me. There’s an invisible energy pulling us together.
That energy seems to waken something deeper than mere physical attraction and lust. It’s something far more ethereal…an emotional connection orchestrated by fate.
“Kaye…” My voice is barely above a whisper.
“Yes?” Her face tilts up. Those rosebud lips of hers are kissably close.
“Whatever happens with Scott—know that no matter which direction you choose, whatever decision you make—I’ll be there if you need me.”
The air between us crackles. My heart pounds in anticipation as we inch ever so close toward our first kiss. Our gazes lock, and like two magnets, they pull us together.
Her lips part ever so slightly as her breath hitches.
I take both her hands in mine, gently squeeze, then release them. I cup her chin, tenderly, and stroke my thumb along the curve of her jawline, enjoying the moment and soaking in every breath, every beat of my heart, and every sigh she whispers.
We remain in this suspended state for what seems forever, but is probably no more than mere moments.
Kaye breaks the trance with a sigh.
“Thank you. I appreciate it, and I can really use a friend right now.”
And just like that, I get relegated to the friend zone.
What the fuck just happened?
Disappointment and shock hit me like a ton of bricks. It’s a fight to keep my face impassive. I turn away, not wanting her to see the disappointment in my eyes. I allow myself one final moment before backing off completely, firmly claiming my role in the dreaded friend zone.
“Just call if you need me.” I shove my hands into my pockets and walk away.
If it weren’t for Douchebag Scott, I wouldn’t be forced to accept friendship in place of something more.
Just friends?
Forever?
I refuse to accept it. It’s not fair. Not where this night was meant to go. I want way more from Kaye, but she’s not ready, too twisted by Scott’s threats.
And I can’t beat him to a pulp. That’s not fair. It’s not right. The asshole deserves a thorough ass-beating.
This sucks.
It really sucks.
I swallow my disappointment, turn away, and force myself to retreat to where the others gather around the gas fire pit. Nothing prepares me for the hollow feeling growing inside of me.
So, I grab another beer and drink myself into oblivion.
ELEVEN
Zeb
Summer speeds by as the weeks pass. I find myself frustrated both on the home front and at work.
Mitzy’s technical team makes no inroads into Maximus Angelo’s human trafficking operation, except to confirm the bastard’s back at it. Until that’s put to rest, we continue the protective detail at the townhome.
Rafe and Hayes take the brunt of the shifts providing protection for the girls. Their shifts last 48-hours each, depending on what’s going on at work. That’s four days out of seven when I have no legitimate reason to be around Kaye.
Brady, Booker, Alec, and I split the rest of the 24-hr shifts, which means I get to see Kaye once a week at best; sometimes far less.
It’s been two weeks, and I hate it.
When not frustrated by work, I wrack my brain trying to figure out why Kaye seems so distant and remote. Something’s changed in her.
After walking the perimeter, I return to the living room and fall back on the couch with frustration.
“Hey, Sexy Guardian.” Barbi waves to me as I hang out in the living room. “Howzit hangin’?”
“A little to the left. How are the girls?”
“Plumped and ready for a night on the town.” She stops in the hall and does a little spin in a skintight cocktail dress. “How do I look?”
“Positively sinful.”
Barbi’s a hot mess, but a stunning woman. She’s got a great sense of humor. After hearing one of my exchanges with Mitzy, she adopted the Howzit hanging routine as her own. It’s now our official greeting.
“Where’s Kaye? Is she going out with you?” I hate that I have to ask. I should know, but Kaye’s in her own world these days. Whenever I see her, her expression is closed and distant. I barely get a smile.
“Ah, you poor, poor man.” Barbi shakes her head. “Trapped in the dreaded friend zone.”
“Don’t remind me.” I roll my eyes in an Oscar worthy performance.
“When are you going to get off your ass and tell her how you feel?” Barbi crosses her arms over her chest and stares down her nose at me.
“You know why I haven’t.”
Barbi’s become my confidant over the past few weeks, and a bit of a co-conspirator. Unlike Rafe and Hayes who’ve told me in no uncertain terms to stay away, Barbi wants me and Kaye to get together.
“Is Scott still bothering her?” It’s a question I ask myself a hundred times a day.
“Why don’t you ask her?” Barbi may be my confidant and co-conspirator, but she won’t do my job for me.
“Because she always seems so uncomfortable when I bring it up.”
“She’s not seeing him. If that’s what you’re worried about.” Barbi glides into the room and gracefully slides into the padded chair across from the couch I’ve appropriated as my own. “Not that you ever ask.”
“Not my business to know.”
“Yeah, but you want to know. As far as I’m aware, things have cooled off with him.”
“Meaning?”
“Well, no more packages of dog shit for one thing.” Her flippant attitude irritated me at first, but when I realized it’s how she jokes around, I got over myself. Barbi’s a solid friend; to me and to Kaye.
“She’s rarely around.” I sound like a grumpy teenager not getting his way. “How do you know she’s not back with him?”
I’m in a shit mood, because I’m pining for Kaye like a lovestruck puppy dog. I’m not a damn puppy dog. I’m more of a Doberman; a fiercely protective… Why the fuck am I comparing myself to dogs?
I know why.
News flash, I’m in my longest dry spell since I was a horny teen desperate for sex of any kind.
And I’m cranky because I’m not getting any sex. Haven’t since I met Kaye. Between work and guard duties at the townhouse, my social life—aka sex life—is on a definite downturn.
“Well, she hasn’t mentioned it to me, and she tells me everything.” Barbi yanks down the bottom of her dress. It barely covers her ass.
“There’s distance growing between us.” I grumble and mutter like a lovestruck fool.
“Do you think Kaye feels awkward after sharing so much?” Barbi’s well aware of what Kaye shared with me that night on the roof. She makes no bones about wanting things between me and Kaye to work out.
“I don’t know.” I drag my hand down my face and pull at my chin. “This friend zone stuff is for the birds. I’m about ready to pull out my hair.”
“Then make a point to talk to her.” Barbi flicks her lashes, exacerbated by my failure to act and rolls her eyes. “Better yet, go in there and kiss her already.” She makes a vague gesture with her hand. “I’m certainly not coming home tonight if things work out.” She flashes a mischievous grin. “You’ve got the room to yourselves.”
“I’m not going to go in there and molest her.”
“How do you know that’s not exactly what she wants? And I didn’t mean that you should molest her. I meant talk to her. Why are men such thick-headed idiots?”
“Has she specifically told you she’s not seeing him?”
“No.” Barbi curls her fingers and flips her hand around to admire her impeccable manicure. “Her nose is always in her books and she has zero time for me, let alone you. At night, she goes to bed early, says she’s too tired to stay up. Maybe you should give her some slack?”
A studious individual, Kaye is trying to get a head start on her first semester at UC Davis’s world-renowned veterinary school.
“You’re right; she’s probably stressed.” I don’t like how defensive I sound, but I’m in unknown territory.
How do I get myself out of the dreaded friend zone?
“Have you wondered whether she’s waiting for you to make the first move?”
“How is asking her to watch a movie in the dark not making a move?”
“Oh my God, you’re hopeless. That’s exactly what a friend would do. Maybe you should stop doing that kind of shit and march in there, shove her against the wall, kiss her until her toes curl, and rip her shirt off.”
“That’s a bit over the top. Are we talking about me and Kaye or what you want Alec to do to you?”
She and Alec had a bit of a fling the first week we started the protective detail at the townhome. Something happened because the two of them started out strong then crashed and burned. Neither one will say what happened.
“Alec is a total tool.” Barbi dismisses my comment. “I’m talking about you. Specifically about your problem.”
“I’m driving myself insane. That’s what I’m doing, and you know why I can’t do any of that alpha-male stuff. Not after Scott…”
“Please, that douchebag is a Dom-wannabe. He’s nothing more than an asshole pretending to be a man. You’ve got the dominant, alpha vibe down pat. Kaye obviously likes that. You just need to close the gap. Seriously, why am I even bothering?”
“She specifically told me she didn’t like the way Scott treated her.”
“Because he’s an ass.” Barbi stands and smooths out the wrinkles in her dress. “And you’re an idiot. I’m telling you, get yourself back in the game. How about increasing the time you’re here? One day a week is no good.”
“I try to volunteer for more shifts, but Rafe and Hayes always seem to block me.”
“Well, they’re just being overly protective cockblockers. They know what will happen if you and Kaye spend any quality time together.”
“You’re right. I need more time, and I’m counting on you to give me that time.”
“Me? How am I…” She stares at me, then backs away. “Oh, no way. I am not doing that.”
“I haven’t even asked you to do anything.”
“You’re going to ask me to do something with Alec so you can take his shifts.”
“The two of you seemed to be having fun. He’ll give me his shifts. Rafe and Hayes can’t do shit about that.”
“Alec and I were having fun, until we weren’t. If you want Alec’s shifts, talk to him. Hell, talk to Brady or Booker if you have to. Those two haven’t ham-stringed you like Rafe and Hayes.”
“Why don’t you talk to Kaye? Do some recon for me.”
“I am not playing matchmaker between you and Kaye.” Barbi wanders to the hall, heading out. “She’s here for two more weeks before moving to Davis. Whatever you’re going to do, you better do it before she leaves. After that…” Barbi shrugs. “Don’t let that door close on your ass. You’re a good guy. Not my type, but definitely Kaye’s. Personally, I like the idea of you hanging around, but you’re not doing yourself any favors sitting on the couch, pining away, when you should be in her bed.”
“I’m not pining.”
“No. You’re sitting on the goddamn couch while Kaye’s in her room—alone.”
“She’s back?”
“Yeah, dude. Got back from the library about twenty minutes ago.”
“Then why didn’t you say something?”
“Because you’re sitting on the couch like all the other nights. Moping. Go talk to her.”
With that, Barbi departs. She’ll be out all night. The woman is insatiable. She’s just like Alec in that regard. Don’t see why things didn’t work out between them. They’re a match made in heaven.
As for me, I’ll stay up late into the night, patrolling the exterior and interior of the townhouse, while driving myself insane with the thought of getting Kaye alone and fixing this friend zone thing.
Maybe I should take Barbi’s advice?
Fuck it.
I force myself to get off the couch and wander down the hall leading to Kaye and Barbi’s room. At the door, I knock gently.
“Who is it?” Kaye sounds off, like she’s been crying.
“Is everything okay?” I ask cautiously and slowly push open the door.
When I see her, she tenses and looks away. Shoulders hunched, she looks sad, and did she just wipe a tear from her face?
“Kaye? Are you okay?” I cautiously walk into her room.
My heart clenches and I want nothing more than to wrap her in a big hug and make her feel safe, but that’s not what she needs right now.
“I’m fine.” When she looks at me, her gaze is distant, her expression defeated. A heavy sigh leaves her lips and she mumbles something so softly I can’t hear what she says.
“You don’t look fine.” My natural instinct is to comfort her, but there’s an odd distance between us.
Things have definitely cooled off from that initial flash of heat when we met.
“I am.” She turns away from me, giving me her back. “I’m perfectly fine.” Her tone is resolute, yet broken at the same time; an empty shell of her normal vibrant self.
Discolorations around her wrists, and again at her neck, catch my eye and stop me dead in my tracks.
Something is very wrong.
“Kaye, if you need any help. Any help at all. I’m here. All you have to do is ask.”
“I said I was fine. Now if you could please leave me alone? I’m tired and just want to go to bed.”
My stomach clenches and it takes everything in me not to rush to her side, but Kaye’s made it very clear she will handle things on her own. All I can do is wait for her to come back to me, but I know ligature marks when I see them.
And I know exactly what’s got Kaye down.
“You’re back with Scott.” I see it in the way she moves, how distant she is, and the fear simmering beneath the surface.
“What? No!” Kaye’s emphatic in her denial. “I’m not.”
She turns away and takes a deep breath before facing me again. Her gaze hardens into one of determination instead of sadness.
It’s weird, and very out of character, as if her emotions just flipped on their head.
“You’re definitely back with him.” Maybe I shouldn’t press, but Scott’s a dangerous man. I take a step toward Kaye.
I could end this for her. Fight her battle and free her from an abusive man. I have the skills. I know what it takes to bring down a monster, but this isn’t my fight.
At least, not directly.
Ultimately, Kaye needs to battle this herself, but I can help her along the way.
“You can tell me. No judgment. I’m here. Here for anything you need. From a shoulder to cry on to a knight riding in on a white horse.”
My attempt at humor opens her up by a crack. There’s the faintest hint of a smile, but it’s wiped clean before it can take root. Kaye’s definitely hurting.
I move into the room, until I stand beside her, far closer than a friend would stand.
Fuck the friend zone. I’m in full Protector mode now.
I reach out and slowly place my hand on her shoulder. She flinches at first, but then her body relaxes. I say nothing. Not yet. I let the silence between us speak the words I want to say.
I’m here.
I’ll protect you.
You can count on me.
You can lean on me.
Through little movements, I reassure her that I’m here for her.
She lets out a long sigh, as if resigning herself to the fact I see the truth and her lie is exposed. I take that as a sign to close the distance and sit beside her on her bed.
She says nothing but leans against me. I lift my arm up and over her shoulder and pull her into a side hug. How long we sit there, I don’t know, but she seems to relax.
“Kaye, I want to help you.” My voice wavers with uncertainty. I desperately want to help.
No, that’s not it.
I want to march out the front door guns blazing, find Asshat-Scott, string him up, and draw and quarter him for fun. But I don’t do that. I’m too fearful going off on Scott will push the wrong buttons with Kaye and result in massive fallout that could ruin any chance I have at her.
“Can you…” Her voice catches, and this time she does wipe a tear from her face. “Do you think you could hold me?”
I glance down at the bruising on her wrists and the marks on her throat. Rage boils up within me, and all I see is red. All I want is to make Scott pay for destroying my Kaye.
