Spellbinding Love, page 9
CHAPTER TEN
But whether it was guilt or regret in his expression she couldn’t discern. She barely had time to register that fact when the doorbell rang, first once and then several times in a row, and she had to climb off of him and find her robe, throwing helpless looks over her shoulder at him. Micah sat up, his back to her, and she sprinted barefoot downstairs, clutching the front of her robe closed. The hardwood floors chilled her feet and the radiators rattled and hissed as they came to life.
She opened the door to find her vet standing there with Giroud straining at his leash. Despite everything, Katie let out a happy exclamation and sank to her knees. Giroud covered her face with licks and nuzzles and she wrapped her arms around his soft, warm neck, burying her face in his fur. “I thought you’d call me,” she said, abruptly remembering there was another human present.
Dr. Garcia gave her an indulgent smile. Her vet was only a few years older than her, but Katie felt young and vulnerable in front of her. “The Xiongs called about a goat and I figured if I was coming out this way, I’d bring him along so you didn’t have to wait for me to get back. I take it you’re doing okay? Molly said you were in rough shape.”
“I’m doing a lot better,” she said.
“Did I wake you?”
“Don’t worry about it,” Katie evaded. “Thank you for taking care of him and bringing him home.”
Dr. Garcia patted Giroud’s flank affectionately. “I’m just glad he’s okay, and both of you stay off ice for the rest of this winter, you hear?”
“Loud and clear,” Katie said with a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. She could hear the upstairs floorboards creaking and her heart sank. For one crazy second she considered running after Dr. Garcia and asking her to stay for just a little bit longer, if only to delay the inevitable, but her pickup was already trundling down the driveway
Micah came down the stairs, fully dressed. Giroud trotted over for attention and Micah crouched down to ruffle his ears without looking at Katie. “Good to see you, boy,” he crooned. “Don’t do that to me ever again, you hear?”
Katie knew that was at least partially directed towards her, but her throat was too tight to say anything. This morning already felt like a dream that was fading away.
Micah stood and faced her. “I should go,” he said, and the crack in his voice told her how much it hurt him to say that.
“I think we should talk,” she managed.
“I don’t,” he said, shattering her heart. “I don’t— I can’t, Katie. I can’t do this.”
“I thought this was what you wanted,” she protested. “I thought—“
“Yeah, I thought so too. But this— I can’t keep feeling like this, Katie. I need to know you’re in this, for real.”
“I am.” She had thought her heart might stop beating when Giroud went through the ice, but now it did. She was back in the water, numb and confused and terrified. “I wouldn’t have done that if I wasn’t sure. You know that.”
“No, I don’t,” he said, and she was wrong— she wasn’t numb. Her heart was breaking and it hurt more than words could say. She was sinking under the surface, fighting for breath, frozen to the bone. “But I do know that right now, I can’t keep going. I can’t be your safety net and I can’t be— I can’t be someone you won’t let go, just because you’re afraid of losing me. I want you to want me.”
I do, she wanted to scream. I want you so badly it hurts. That’s what this morning was about, wasn’t it? But the words died on her tongue. If he didn’t believe her after this morning, he might never believe her. Micah could be stubborn as a goat, and once he had an idea in his brain— good or bad— he stuck to it until overwhelming evidence proved otherwise. It was part of what she loved about him, but it made changing his mind nearly impossible. Katie swallowed hard and stepped aside. Micah strode out her front door and she crumpled against it as soon as he was out of sight. Giroud crowded against her, lapping at her chin and letting her bury her face in his warm fur. She cuddled him close and made a decision.
She’d have to figure out a way to win Micah back.
Jack raised his eyebrows in surprise when he opened the door. “I didn’t think there was a girls’ night scheduled,” he said, stepping back to let her into Linnea’s house. “Did I get my wires crossed?”
“Who is it?” Linnea yelled from upstairs.
“Katie!” he yelled back.
“Wait, Katie’s here?” Linnea hollered.
“Is this how you guys always are?” Katie asked and shrugged out of her coat.
“Pretty much, yeah,” Jack replied.
Linnea thundered down the stairs. “Did we have plans?” she asked.
Katie remembered a little belatedly that her friends had regular 9-5 jobs and probably didn’t just show up at each other’s houses randomly like she used to do with Micah. “No, um, I— need to talk. Well, I need help with a plan.” She had spent the last week trying to come up with a way to prove to Micah she was in it for real, but eventually had to concede that she probably needed reinforcements. And Linnea alone was worth half an army.
“Want me to make myself scarce?” Jack offered.
“Nah. The more brains I have working on this, the better.”
“Is this an emergency? Do you want Alison and Erik here too?” Linnea asked.
Katie chewed on her lower lip and then nodded. “Actually, yeah. I think we have to crowdsource this. Sorry, I should have waited until—“
“Don’t worry about it,” Linnea interrupted.
By the time Erik and Alison— and Jess, because Katie figured she should call in on hands on deck— arrived, Katie was settled on the couch with Linnea’s favorite cheap red wine and her black cat Harry purring on her lap. Jess stole Harry away and took the arm chair. “He’s the most spoiled cat in the entire cov— book club,” Jess cooed into Harry’s fur, realizing her mistake halfway through and attempting to cover.
“Oh, are we pretending Erik and I don’t know about the witch thing?” Jack asked, eyes dancing.
“Erik knows?” Linnea shrieked. “What? Since when?”
Erik twisted the cap off his beer. “Since forever. You had entire conversations with our dead grandpa, Linn. I’m not an idiot.”
“Mom said I couldn’t tell you!”
“And Dad said it was best to just play dumb,” Erik shrugged. “But come on. You’re terrible at secrets.”
“So our entire lives you’ve been lying to me?”
“You’ve been lying to me for just as long,” Erik bickered.
“I am so sorry everyone,” Jess deadpanned as the Peterson siblings swelled in annoyance with each other.
“Okay, everyone knows we’re witches, moving on,” Katie interjected. “This is about me, remember?”
“Can someone tell us why we’re here? Jack was infuriatingly cryptic in his text,” Alison asked, crossing her legs.
Katie took a deep breath. “I have to win Micah back.”
“Back? What did you do?” Jack asked, and the rest of the women shot him dirty looks. “I mean, what happened?” he amended.
“Unimportant. The point is, he thinks I don’t love him and I do, so I have to prove it to him.”
“And I assume just saying so is out of the question for some reason?” Erik asked.
“Yes. It’s gotta be big.”
“Big doesn’t really seem like your style,” Alison pointed out. “In fact, it seems the exact opposite of your style.”
“Yeah, like— I’m big,” Linnea said, gesturing to herself with both hands. “Me and Jack are like—“
“Over the top? Dramatic? Attention whores?” Erik supplied.
Linnea threw a pillow at her brother and he caught it easily. “Anyway, just like— what are you going for here? ‘I’m a totally new person’ or ‘This is huge for me so believe it?’”
“The latter,” Katie decided.
“And I assume we want something meaningful for you both, right? What do you guys do when it’s just you?”
“Argue about soccer and…um…I dunno,” Katie said. “We just are around each other, you know? We do everything together. Which is why I need help.”
Jess smiled softly. “Do you guys have any routines or traditions?”
“There’s a New Year’s Eve thing we’d do out at our place, but he’s definitely not going to come down for that.”
“How elaborate is it? And what is it?” Linnea pressed. She’d pulled a legal pad out of nowhere and was taking notes.
“It’s a firework thing. Look, it’s nothing, and it’s not like—“
“Fireworks we can work with,” Linnea interrupted. “Are we thinking at Witch Lake?”
“I don’t—“
“We’d probably have to get a permit,” Jack pointed out. “Unless we want to do the teenager ‘light shit on fire and then run’ thing, but remember, that’s much easier for you white kids than me.”
“Can we get a permit?” Linnea asked.
“His restaurant is in Northeast, right?” Erik asked. “Because I know a few cops who bring their cars into the garage. Let me handle that.”
“I’m a lawyer,” Jack announced, as if that was news to anyone in the room. “I can get us a goddamn permit for a couple of fireworks, or else I’m going to ask them to disbar me.”
Katie took a fortifying gulp of wine. “Guys, this feels out of control. And like we’re way too fixated on the permit aspect.”
“Does it? Or are you just chickening out?” Jess asked, uncharacteristically blunt.
Katie pondered that. “Fuck it, full speed ahead,” she said.
New Year’s Eve was a busy night for Witch Lake Burgers, which meant someone had to be responsible for getting Micah out of the kitchen. Katie could have enlisted the sous chef Solveig, but it felt shitty to get an employee involved, so Jack volunteered instead. “He knows me and I’m charming as all hell,” Jack said when he offered. “Trust me. I’m really good at talking people into doing shit.”
But that left Katie standing outside in her parka on a cold New Year’s Eve, hands stuffed awkwardly in her pockets while Jess and Linnea argued with Erik about who was lighting the fireworks. “You have two Fire Witches here,” she heard Jess explain. “Seriously, just let us do the explosives.”
“Counterpoint: setting shit on fire is fun and I don’t want you guys to have all of it,” Erik retorted.
Alison nudged her with her elbow, her brown waves peeking out from under her bright knitted red hat. “You okay?” she asked.
Katie nodded, her stomach churning with nerves. But she had nothing left to lose at this point, and everything to gain, so what the hell.
Jack came hustling out of Witch Lake’s front entrance and waved his hands above his head. “That’s our cue,” Alison said, and she joined the rest of their friends back behind the bushes where the fireworks were laid out.
Jack had just skidded behind a tree when Micah left the restaurant, a familiar black silhouette against the warm light inside. It wasn’t quite midnight yet, but that was fine. It was the gesture, not the timing, that mattered.
Micah waited for a car to trundle past before crossing the road. “Katie?” he asked when he approached. “Jack said—“ he broke off and looked around. “There aren’t any cops out here ticketing all my customers, are there?” he asked drily.
“He was supposed to come up with a better lie than that,” Katie said in a stage whisper.
“It worked, though,” Jack’s voice called, breaking the tension. She laughed and Micah chuckled.
“How many of them are here?” Micah asked.
“All of them.”
He sighed, but not unhappily. “Figures.”
His half-smile warmed her to her toes and gave her the courage to go on. “I wanted to talk to you,” she said.
“And you had to resort to lies on New Year’s Eve?”
“I know you’re busy, but I wanted to make a statement, okay?” She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a heartbeat. “When you first told me you loved me, I freaked out. I don’t even have a good reason for it, I just— panicked. You’re my family, Micah, but you’re more than that. You’re my home. I don’t know who I am without you, and maybe that’s not the healthiest way to be but that’s who I am. And when you wanted more, I did too, but I couldn’t— I couldn’t stop seeing the what ifs. What if you wanted something I couldn’t give you, like if you wanted kids, because I don’t know if I do. What if you changed your mind, or wanted to live up here and I had to sell the farm, or—“
“I’d never ask that of you,” Micah interrupted. “The farm is my home too.”
“I know. I didn’t say these were rational fears,” she chided with a grin. He was looking at her with such warmth it was almost hard to continue, but she persevered. “But mostly I was scared I might lose you. I’ve lost my whole family, Micah, and you’re already so important to me, and I just— I was scared, and when I’m scared I shut down, and I thought I was protecting you. But I wasn’t. I was being a fucking coward, and I’m sorry.”
She waved her hand towards the bushes to signal the others. She heard rustling, a hiss, and then a quiet shriek as the first set of fireworks launched. “Because I’m in love with you, Micah Johnson.” Above them the fireworks popped and red sparks reflected in Micah’s eyes. “I want to spend every goddamn New Year’s Eve with you, just like we always have.” She pulled out the cheap beer from her pocket and handed it to him, opening one for herself. “I couldn’t bring the shed up here, so I had to improvise. But this is me, saying I want to do this. For real, and forever.” Her hands trembled slightly, and it wasn’t the cold.
Micah looked at her and shook his head. “You realize it sounds like you’re proposing, don’t you?” he teased.
Honestly, that was never part of the plan. But the moment he said it, she knew in her heart it was right. She smiled. “And if I am?”
Micah’s eyes widened and the peanut gallery gasped audibly. “Wait, hear me out,” Katie said, her mouth moving faster than her brain. Her heart was leading this time, and she let it. “We know each other better than anyone else on this planet. I love you, and if you still love me— even after I was shitty to you, and let’s face it, you were a little shitty to me— then fuck it, yeah, I am asking you to marry me. So will you marry me?”
Micah blinked. Two more fireworks exploded. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”
“I am.” Her heart was pounding and she had to set down her beer because she was about to spill it. Katie knelt, snow melting into her jeans. “I’ve never been more sure about anyone or anything in my life, and if you need time, I get that, but I’m in this. Forever.”
Micah dropped his beer and caught her face in his icy-cold hands, dragging her up. He kissed her hard and this time, she didn’t need to rush or stop herself from thinking, she just luxuriated in the fact that he was hers and she was his. Fireworks popped and fizzed above them and inside her ribcage, and she wrapped her arms around his neck to kiss him back while their friends whooped in excitement.
And behind them, the bushes burst into bloom.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“Everyone’s gonna think your pregnant, you know,” Linnea said as Katie dropped down on the hay bale next to her.
Katie fussed with the hem of her knee-length white dress and shrugged. “Eventually they’ll figure it out, when no baby appears in nine months.”
“My mom thinks you’ll be giving birth in six,” Linnea corrected. “Pretty sure she’s got money riding on it.”
“I bet Karen’s got seven months, that traitor,” Katie said without any real heat.
She moved over as Alison approached. “The food is to die for,” Alison said, reaching to straighten Katie’s veil. “But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, with you two.”
“Micah spent all last night prepping,” Katie admitted. Out in front of them, Barb and Tom Peterson danced to a slow, jazzy song, lit from above by the old-fashioned string of lights Linnea had insisted on hanging up yesterday afternoon. It really did make the barn look like a Pinterest board, just like Linnea and Alison promised, and it felt right.
Micah materialized in front of her and held out his hand. “There you are,” he chided. “Been looking everywhere for you.”
“There’s only like, thirty people here,” she countered.
Micah sighed exasperatedly. “Are you going to dance with your husband, or no?”
Katie grinned— she hadn’t stopped since New Year’s, it felt like— and took his hand, letting him pull her up. His arm circled her waist and she rested her forehead against his shoulder. “Everything is perfect,” she murmured. “The food is a hit.”
“Thanks,” he said, his lips pressed to her temple. Just an hour ago they had stood in this very barn and promised— in the presence of all their friends, Katie’s coven, and under the watchful eyes of Linnea and Barb Peterson— to be each other’s family forever. He already was, in truth, but it felt good to make it official. “You’re having fun?” he asked.
“Of course. I would have married you in a basement, but yeah, this is pretty good,” she said, smiling to herself. Micah had moved in to the farm within a week of New Year’s, and his apartment was currently sublet to John, Erik’s old roommate. Katie was worried he’d hate the commute to the restaurant, but Micah said it had given him some much needed separation and let the staff run things a little more independently, which felt more sustainable. Spring planting was the easiest it had ever been, largely because she knew Micah was there with her. It was inexplicably wonderful to have him there at all times, and even though people— mostly Barb— raised their eyebrows at news of the quick engagement and ceremony, she never had a second thought. This was right.
Around them, their friends slowly drifted onto the dance floor, Linnea and Jack twirling and grinning and Alison and Erik slowly swaying. Jess had her arm wrapped around Dr. Garcia’s waist, the taller woman’s hair hiding Jess’s face. Katie tipped her head up to look at Micah and found him smiling down at her, fond and happy, and she went onto her tiptoes to kiss him, just because she could.
