Don't Hate Me (Club Pétale), page 17
For the first time, I wasn’t afraid to admit it.
I liked Quinn. A lot. I wanted to see her all the time and have her sleep over every night if I could.
I didn’t care that she never invited me over to her place. Or that whatever “contractor job“ she had seemed to give her far more free time than I had.
Maybe she was just busy?
That would be logical. People had lives, including her. My situation was an anomaly, and I had to remember that there were people out there with family, friends, and people outside of the relationship other than just me.
Did Quinn have a family? Avery was obviously a friend… or something like that? But I hadn’t heard her talk about her family at all…
She could be doing whatever caused her to get blood in her hair in the first place. Maybe she was a serial killer, and I was her next victim—
“Oh my god, shut up,” I murmured to my racing thoughts.
But they just kept coming. I thought about texting her again. Maybe even calling her. Anything would be better than just sitting here with these crazy thoughts going through my head.
It was pathetic and almost scary that I was so crazy about her.
When my thumb hovered over her contact, a knock came at the door.
My heart skipped a beat, and my mouth went dry. Excitement burst through me, and before I knew it, I was bounding toward the door.
It had to be her. There was only one person who would show up at my door at this hour.
And true to my thoughts, when I flung the door open, she was there. But my smile dropped when I saw the look on her face.
Something was wrong. That cold mask she had on at the club was firmly back in place. Those piercing blue eyes of hers seemed to dull in the dim light of the hallway. There was an aura about her, one that warned me to stay away.
She took one step in, closing the door behind her. The sound of the lock clicking into place echoed throughout the room.
She closed the space between us in two large strides before grabbing the hair on the back of my neck and yanking my head back so that I was forced to look her in the eyes.
“Are you okay?” I asked, my voice just above a whisper.
She didn’t answer. Her eyes searched my face for… something, but from the look on her face, it was safe to say she didn’t find it.
“Are you okay?” I asked again, gripping the front of her shirt.
“Don’t ask me that.” Her words came out like a plea.
I brought my hand up to her cheek and pulled her lips to mine ever so gently. She lunged forward, meeting my kiss with a ferocity that made me gasp.
Her hands were at my waist, hoisting me up and wrapping my legs around her in seconds. Her hot tongue slid across mine, covering every inch of my mouth.
Her kiss burned. Caused my stomach to flip. She was speaking to me in a way she couldn’t with her words.
Pay attention to me, it told me. Take away whatever it is that is making me feel this way.
Of course, I obliged. There was nothing more in that moment that I wanted to do besides make her forget everything outside of this apartment.
We didn’t make it into my room. We made it as far as the couch before she deposited me on it, and we started shedding our clothing.
Once my pants were off, she gripped my thighs and pulled me to her. I let out a yelp, and the suddenness of it quickly turned into a moan when her lips found my clit.
“I want to touch you,” I whined as I bucked against her mouth. Two of her fingers pushed into my entrance. Neither of us were surprised that I was already wet. It was a given. As long as she was around, my body would react in ways even I didn’t comprehend.
“Me first,” she all but growled between my legs.
She pumped her fingers into me at an animalistic pace. At times her movements were still clumsy and needed guidance, but goddamn did this girl love to eat pussy. And she learned fast. Over the few times we had been together, she learned exactly what to do to make me come.
It wasn’t hard, and it never has been, but somehow it was different with her. Like she made it her mission to watch me fall apart.
I readied my legs for her and grinned against her mouth. She was causing a delicious heat to build up in me that was already threatening to burst. My stomach quivered as the orgasm neared, and my thighs shook. Wetness was trailing down my thighs and to the couch, but I didn’t care.
Neither did she. Like her kiss, Quinn was saying something with her touches. She was reminding me of what she could do to me. Reminding me who made me feel this way.
I came with a scream.
It hadn’t been too long since my last orgasm, but the one she forced from me ripped through me like none other. It seized my entire body and made my pussy clench around her fingers with no remorse.
Sweat broke out over my body as I rode wave after wave of it.
It was so addicting that I didn’t want it to stop. I greedily rode her face even after my orgasm subsided.
“Let me touch you,” I panted. “Please, I need to make you come.”
She chuckled against my wet cunt.
“So eager to taste, huh?” she asked, lifting her face to show me how much of my release was coated on her lips.
“Please,” I begged and brought my fingers down to play with my clit. “Sit on my face. Ride me until you can’t take it anymore.”
She paused before cursing under her breath.
“If it were anyone else, I would say no,” she said, then lifted herself. I watched as she unbuttoned her pants and pulled them down with her underwear. The tuft of hair between her legs caused my mouth to water.
“But you trust me,” I finished for her.
Her answer was crawling over me until her pussy sat right above me. She was so wet she began dripping on my mouth. I licked my lips, moaning at the taste of her.
“I don’t know how it happened,” she said, lowering herself. “But ye—oh fuck.”
The curse that fell from her lips as I wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her down to me was sinful. I couldn’t wait to hear more of it.
I ate Quinn’s cunt like I was starved. I made sure to show her how good she was to have trusted me. I sucked on her clit hard enough to make her back bow before teasing her entrance with my tongue.
When her hips jerked, I tried to pull her back down so she could do it on my face, but she was barely putting any weight on me.
“Sit on me,” I commanded. “Fuck my face like you want to. I can feel you holding back.”
She leaned forward, putting her hands on the arm of the sofa behind me. I looked up to catch her gaze.
“I don’t want to…” She frowned.
“Hurt me?” I supplied for her. She gave me a tense nod. I laughed and turned my head to the side to bite into her thigh. Her gasp went straight to my core. “You won’t. But if you’re so worried, three taps means pull back, okay?”
She nodded before lowering herself onto me.
This time I hooked her, though, and threaded my hands together in front of her waist making it damn near impossible for her to move away from me.
“Blake be—ah.”
Her complaints died when I brought her clit back into my mouth. She stayed still, letting me do the work on her clit. But when I faltered my tongue and teased it from her sopping entrance to her clit, she began to buck against me.
I hummed against her, and she took it as a sign to go even harder.
If I hadn’t been falling for the woman before then, I certainly had been after.
For the first time, I saw her truly unrestrained. Her head was thrown back, showing off her strong, elongated neck. The buckles in it tightened as her hands gripped onto the arms of the couch for dear life.
Her small tits bounced with her movements, and her stomach contracted as the pleasure she was chasing finally came to a head.
Beautiful. She was beautiful in the most unrelenting and cruel ways. The image of her riding my face until she came with the most enchanting cry was something I would never forget.
“Okay, okay,” she panted above me. “I came. My turn, now let me—”
She let out a groan when I tightened my hold on her and fused my mouth back to her clit.
Just like her, I couldn’t get enough. I loved pussy. I loved eating it. Loved fucking it. But most of all, I was starting to realize it was her that I loved the most.
How someone so cold and mysterious sunk their claws into me was beyond me, but for the first time I couldn’t help but feel happy she found me in the arcade when she did.
I wanted to learn more about her. Learn what made her tick. Learn where she came from. Learn who she wanted to be.
It was small, but it was a start. A start that, for the longest time, I never thought I would have.
Quinn
Something changed.
I don’t know when it happened, or why, but something between Blake and me changed.
I should have realized it sooner because every time I thought about her, I had this sinking feeling in my gut that threatened to poison me. Every time I was around her, that same feeling filled the air, invading my lungs like a toxic fume.
But it was that same toxic fume that made me feel so warm on the inside. The same fume that made me pull Blake into my arms as she slept and inhale her scent like I may never smell it again.
I sighed against her, letting the warmth of her body take over me.
I had never felt a warmth like I did when I was with her. The world has always been so cold. So unforgiving. But her warmth somehow sank past the harsh walls I had erected during my life.
Even if it was just for a few moments, I wanted to relish in what we had.
Even if it was fake.
And it was going to end soon. Even just the thought caused my stomach to twist and bile to rise in my throat.
Two weeks. That was the timeline Rolf had forced on me. He knew what it would force me to do.
He didn’t want me to linger any longer. What would have been an easy, humane way to pry information and end the target was starting to turn ugly.
He wanted to force my move.
But I didn’t want to hurt her. That much was true. I couldn’t finish saying it then because it felt like a lie. But deep down, we both knew it wasn’t.
I didn’t want to hurt her. Even if Rolf was forcing my hand. I wanted to do this my way.
It was that thought that spurred me.
I gently unwrapped myself from Blake before slipping out of bed. I wasn’t sure the next time I would be able to sneak into her place with all the eyes watching, so I had to take whatever chance I could.
She didn’t stir as I left her room.
Most of the house was bare, save for a few decorations. The bookshelf was the first place I searched, pulling out book after book and checking to see if anything was hiding inside.
I came across a few books about the arcade game she seemed to love so much. A bitter smile spread across my face that I forced down.
I didn’t like that my first thought after seeing those books was to visit again with her one day.
Because that one day won’t happen. Something I needed to keep reminding myself of.
With a frustrated sigh, I put the books back and moved on to my next area.
But there was nothing. After searching the kitchen, living room, and guest bathroom, I was left with no other place to look than the bedroom.
I tiptoed inside, checking to see if Blake was still asleep. I could just make out the heap of blankets she had covered herself with in my absence. The sound of her deep breathing filled the room.
Every time I slept over, I was always on the left side. There was nothing in that nightstand, I had already checked, so the last place to look was hers.
I was silent as I walked across the room. When I kneeled down, the boards creaked beneath my feet and caused me to freeze. I listened to see if the sound startled the little agent, but she didn’t so much as stir.
I didn’t want to find anything in the nightstand. I was praying that I wouldn’t.
I pulled it open slowly, noticing the all-black notebook at the front. I pulled that out first, flipping through the pages.
It’s a diary.
For some reason, I wasn’t surprised that someone like Blake had a diary. What I was surprised to find was just how long it had been going on for.
It dated back about eight years. So even before she went into the Secret Service.
I shouldn’t have been wasting time going through it, but the urge was too strong to ignore.
I never thought I’d be writing my last will and testament, but it’s becoming clearer and clearer that I may not make it here any longer.
He’s getting angrier. The times between are becoming shorter and shorter.
Mom, I’m sorry I’m leaving you so soon.
Burn my body. Leave no trace of me on this earth. If anyone wanted to do just a single thing nice for me please listen to this: when I die, erase my pitiful existence from this earth.
Her words caused my chest to squeeze painfully. They were so raw, so hopeless… and almost word for word what I had filled out for my contract with Rolf. There was a certain way they disposed of our bodies in order to keep their secrets intact, but many times the assassin would say what they wanted and it was up to the agency to decide whether it should be granted or not.
I too wanted to be burned. I wanted the entire world to forget about what I had done. I wanted my ashes to float up into the sky and, for once, give my soul a taste of the freedom I would never get.
But then, the quieter, sadder part of me always hated the idea of being burned. The same part was crying and screaming at Rolf to save me. At me to save myself.
My mind went back to the conversation we had in her bed while we looked up at the stars.
The secret we whispered. One that we knew would never come true.
A bit of a sign that someone came before you.
And that maybe someone will remember that I came before as well.
The memory hurt more now that I realized that it was I who would be taking her from this earth. Was her inner child also crying out with their arms wide open, their face covered in tears, their voice hoarse from screaming for too long as well? Or had it quieted over the years when she realized no one was coming to save her?
I flipped through a few pages. Each entry was longer than the last.
He brought me to a party last night but it was… different from before.
His friends were looking at me in that way. A way that only he has looked at me.
When his hands trailed my thighs when they were looking, I didn’t know how to react.
He got mad when I pushed him away.
I still was unable to discern who he was in this scenario, but maybe the friends were a part of Alec’s crew?
I flipped forward a few.
I did it. I ran. I’m sitting on a bus on the way across the country to meet J.
He saved me.
I owe him my life. He will come after me until I’m dead. I know too much.
But I couldn’t stand it. I’d rather be on the run for the rest of my life than have them—
The words were crossed out as if she couldn’t bear to look at them written on the page.
I closed the diary with a sinking feeling in my stomach. My mind was painting a picture. A disgusting one that I didn’t want to think about. One that made my blood boil.
I slipped the diary back in before shifting through the papers in the drawer. Many were newspaper clippings. I pulled out a few, my eyes lingering on the headlines.
Missing Women Still Not Found.
Mother and Father Plead for Their Daughter’s Safe Return.
Unease twisted my stomach, especially when I caught sight of a teary-eyed older couple, holding each other and speaking to an audience.
I put them back. There was nothing else in there save for a few empty paper bags. Then, at the very back, my fingers brushed across something small. A rectangular object that was mostly plastic save for a square at the top.
The USB. My stomach filled with lead. No. My thoughts were loud in my head. Screaming at me to forget my mission entirely and just put the USB back where I had found it.
It was here the entire time. Unguarded and all but thrown away in the bedside table.
A part of me wanted to take it out only to smash it on the ground, but the bigger part of me knew I should take it and report back to Rolf immediately.
But then… this would be over, wouldn’t it? I would have to dispose of Blake and move on to the next target.
This is your job, I reminded myself. You got far too involved, and now it was your chance to pull back.
Gripping the USB, I pulled it out. My heart stopped in my chest when I finally caught sight of it.
What was on here that made someone as powerful as my client come down on someone as harshly as they did Blake?
The cold barrel of the gun pushed against the back of my head, causing me to freeze.
I hadn’t heard her move. Hadn’t even heard the hitch of her breath as she woke up.
How long had she been watching me?
The fact that she snuck up on me caused a powerful heat to run through me.
Looks like the little agent still has some surprises to show me.
I took a deep, steadying breath, trying to calm down the excitement that was bubbling up inside of me.
A normal human would have been scared to find themselves with a gun pointed at their head, but I had been dreaming about this day. Dreaming about when she would finally shed that innocent mask of hers and show me the bloodthirsty, violent person she was below the surface.
I paused, dropping the USB back into the drawer, to turn around and look at her.
Her face was hard. Lips smooshed into a thin line, eyebrows pushed together. She was angry. So angry that the hand that had once been so steady when pointing a gun to someone’s face now shook.
Those brilliant green eyes showed the betrayal she didn’t allow to show on her face.
I shouldn’t have felt the thrill go through me like it did. Or allow myself to take her in like I did. But I couldn’t help myself. From the moment I saw her on stage, I had been sucked so deeply into the pools that there was no way possible to pull myself out.
