No Second Chances, page 19
part #4 of Goldsworth Series
“This time there won’t be a trial,” Serena told them. “He’ll plead guilty to the charges and the sentencing will be determined at his hearing. No more witnesses, no more juries.”
Tears brimmed in Aurora’s eyes and she hugged Serena to her. Serena patted her on the back and then released her, and Aurora hugged Clint. Clint smiled at Serena over Aurora’s shoulder, and she saw the relief in his eyes.
“I’ll give you two some privacy,” Serena told them. “I just wanted to give you the good news in person.”
“Thank you,” they both said.
Serena waved them off, unable to stop smiling as she left the hospital, relieved that she had been able to keep her promises to them and relieved that justice was finally being done.
* * *
Watching Serena disappear behind the curtain and draw it closed behind her, Clint held Aurora close to him. She smelt the same as she always did, the smell that he had missed so much since they had broken up.
When she let go of him and straightened up, he saw her wipe her eyes. They were happy tears, he knew, and he felt relieved by that.
“I can’t believe it,” she said, shaking her head. “He finally confessed to everything.”
Clint nodded, sharing her smile, and her disbelief. He knew that there was a catch, something that Serena had not shared with them. A deal, a negotiation for reduced time. At least the important thing was that he had finally told the truth and he would not evade justice a second time.
“He’s locked up,” Aurora sighed, sitting down in the chair. Her hand reached for Clint’s automatically, clasping it in hers. Clint smiled at the gesture. “He’s off the estate, and we’re finally safe again.”
Clint frowned.
“I’d have kept you safe,” he said, before he could help himself, unable to stop himself from sounding wounded. Aurora’s smile faltered. “I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. You or Angel. I never will, I promise.”
Aurora squeezed his hand.
“I mean it Aurora,” Clint said, not sure whether it was the relief of Troy’s confession or the painkillers that were making him so open with her. “I love you. I always have done, always will do.”
* * *
Aurora looked at Clint. She knew that he loved her, that he spoke the truth. His eyes were wide, imploring, and he did not look away from her.
She smiled tenderly at him, keeping his hand in hers.
“I know you do,” she said, hoping her voice was light.
He looked disappointed that she had not returned the words, but he tried to hide it, masking his sadness with a smile for her.
A nurse poked her head through the curtain, breaking the silence that had quickly descended over them.
“Is it okay if I check a few things?” she asked, and Clint nodded, turning from Aurora.
She watched as the nurse checked his IV lines and the monitors. As she fastened the blood pressure cuff around his upper arm, Aurora wondered if she still loved Clint.
There was no doubt in her mind that she did. She loved him, but that did not change the fact that there were things in the past that could not be undone, perhaps could not be forgiven. Though her anger with Clint had faded, she did not know whether it would return at some point. Her grief for Shaniqua came and went, the smallest thing could bring back the pain. When it did, could she be sure that she would not hate Clint again for his part in her death? Perhaps love was not enough, perhaps they would both be better off moving on.
The nurse finished her checks and left, and Clint looked at her, his eyes questioning her, but Aurora pretended not to notice as she took his hand in hers again, deep in thought.
* * *
Kojo had given up pacing his bedroom and when his parents had stopped arguing, he had quickly retreated from the flat and gone to visit Scarlett.
He had hoped he would at least be able to relax a little with her for company, but if anything, he felt more uncomfortable. She was sweet, and she cared about him so much, thought so highly of him, that he could hardly bring himself to look at her, fearing she would see at once in his eyes what he had to do to prove himself.
“What’s wrong?” she finally asked. They were in her room, him stretched out on her bed, and her sat on an oversized beanbag, her feet up against the wall. He knew she had been itching to ask him since he had arrived.
“Nothing,” Kojo insisted. Scarlett looked unconvinced. “Seriously, I’m fine. It’s just -”
He hesitated. She was so easy to talk to, and he so desperately wanted to confide in someone, for someone to give him advice, to confirm to him what was right and wrong. She would understand he had not been able to save the girl last time, there were too many guys, and it had been such a shock. She would know that he was not responsible, that he was a good person. The words hovered on the tip of his tongue, but he stopped himself. He could not tell her. Tell anyone. He could not take that risk. Instead, he shook his head.
“It’s just nothing,” he said.
Scarlett raised a disbelieving eyebrow, lips pursing.
“You really expect me to believe that?” she asked. “We haven’t known each other very long, but believe it or not, I can tell when -”
Kojo’s phone rang and he inwardly groaned. It was Kent. Scarlett was silent as Kojo answered, sitting up straight on the bed now, body tensing.
“Everything’s ready now mate,” Kent said. “It’s time.”
* * *
Tyrese watched his mother scrubbing the kitchen counters and wanted to snatch the cloth from her hand and throw it out of the window. He understood that she was grieving for Trent, but they had to plan the funeral, not clean the kitchen for the hundredth time that day.
“Mum, will you sit down?” Tyrese asked, unable to keep the frustration out of his voice.
Keskia did not even look over her shoulder at him.
“I can’t right now,” she said, her tone clipped. Perhaps if she stopped cleaning, if she sat and did nothing then her tears would come back, Tyrese thought.
“This is important,” Tyrese insisted. “We need to make some decisions.”
Keskia stopped, her back tensing but she did not turn around to look at him. He wondered if she was still angry. He had told her about Troy’s arrest when he had received the call from his brother, and it was as if this was the final straw for her. She had been cleaning ever since, not stopping to face her feelings or deal with anything.
“Not right now,” Keskia insisted. Her voice shook with emotion.
Perhaps it was the realisation that it was just the two of them now.
“Fine, I’ll make the arrangements myself,” Tyrese snapped, losing his patience. She was not the only one grieving. She was not the only one who had lost someone.
His phone began to vibrate in his pocket and he pulled it out, eyes narrowing when he saw the caller ID.
It was Jayden Healy.
* * *
Kojo walked quickly across the playing fields back towards the Goldsworth, even though he wanted to turn and run in the opposite direction. He did not want to keep Kent and the others waiting. They would think he was scared, a pussy, even more so than they probably already did.
He tried to keep his mind blank, free from thoughts about what would happen this afternoon. What if he refused to do it? Would they beat him? Or would they laugh and mock him? He would surely lose their respect, that much he knew to be fact.
Reaching the end of the playing fields, he saw a familiar figure walking toward him, and Kojo groaned. This was the last person he wanted to see. He knew there was no way to avoid her, to slip past her unseen. Clint waved, slowing to approach her.
“Where have you been hiding?” Aurora asked. She sounded reproachful, and Kojo wondered if he would get another lecture about not visiting his niece or Clint. “I’ve just been over to your mum to tell her the good news. Clint is doing much better.”
“I was out,” Kojo said, shifting impatiently on his feet, aware that Kent and the others were waiting for him.
“What have you been up to?” Aurora asked. It was a simple enough question, but Kojo sensed an underlying suspicion beneath it. He scowled. The last thing he needed was a lecture from her on Clint’s behalf. Aurora smiled. “Your brother would love it if you visited.”
“It’s none of your business,” Kojo snapped. His anxiety was making him edgy, and that in turn made him feel frustrated. “I’m off to see some mates, that’s all. I’ll visit him when I’m free, but right now I’ve got stuff to do.”
“Mates?” Aurora asked. “You think they’re really your mates?”
The question hit home, and Kojo felt angry with her for that.
“More like brothers,” Kojo said, knowing it would hurt Clint if she told him.
Aurora shook his head, hands in her pockets, looking saddened.
“No, they’re not,” she said softly. “Your brother is in hospital, recovering from being stabbed, anxious for you to show your face if you weren’t such a selfish little brat.”
Kojo felt ashamed for a moment, for his cruel words and for shunning his brother, when he was perhaps one of the only people who would listen to him, help him, if he told him what was expected of him.
Instead of acknowledging that Aurora’s words had hit home, he stepped around her, ignoring the disappointment on her face, heading into the heart of the Goldsworth.
He half-expected Aurora to call after him, but she did not. Kojo resisted the urge to turn around, kept himself moving forward, trying to keep his nerve. His palms were sweaty in his pockets, his heart hammering in his chest, his body seeming to shake with trepidation as he rounded the corner to his mates.
“There you are,” Kent said, looking relieved at the sight of Kojo. “Thought you weren’t going to show up.”
“I bumped into someone,” Kojo sighed, approaching them. He hoped his nerves weren’t showing too much.
“Come on,” Kent said, nudging him, “Let’s get going. We saw her brother leave, but we don’t know how long he’ll be gone for.”
“What if he comes back?” Kojo asked, alarmed.
“We’ll take care of him,” Mickey reassured him, leading the way up a set of stairs. “Don’t worry, man, it’ll be fine.”
Kojo nodded, following them, Kent at his side, his throat dry so he could hardly speak now. His breathing was getting fast, shallow. Was he having a fit? A panic attack? The thought of what the lads would say if he did was distressing.
“Relax,” Kent said quietly beside him, so Leon and Mickey up ahead could not hear. “You’ll do great, man, then we’ll all have a drink and a smoke and celebrate.”
“Yeah,” Kojo said, unable to manage any more words.
They stopped outside one of the doors and Leon knocked, gently at first, then louder. Kojo hoped that nobody would answer, that she had gone out and would not be back. Just as he was starting to believe she was not home, the chain slid back, and the door opened a crack.
The blonde girl peered out, suspicious. Her face still bore the marks from their last encounter.
“Who are you?” she demanded, suspicious.
Kojo couldn’t blame her.
“Visitors,” Leon said, pushing the door open wider, catching her by surprise. She let out a protest, confused, as he barged into the flat, closely followed by Mickey. Kojo hung back, but Kent gave him an encouraging look and then nudged him inside after them.
“Get the fuck out,” the girl said, voice rising, panicking. “Who the fuck do you think you are?”
“Friends of Trent’s,” Leon snapped, shoving her hard, pushing her down the corridor. “He sends his regards.”
“He’s dead,” she stammered, frightened now, realisation beginning to dawn on her.
“His friends aren’t,” Leon said.
He pushed her hard and she hit the wall, letting out a yelp. She raised her hand and slapped him hard, and Leon and Mickey grabbed her and wrestled her through an open door. It was a bedroom, clearly hers. Make-up and perfume cluttered the surfaces, a long mirror hanging on the back of the wardrobe door.
“Please,” she begged, almost crying as she struggled against them. “Please, please.”
Leon shoved her hard onto the bed.
Kojo watched, detached but unable to look away.
“Come on, mate,” Kent urged him. “This is your time.”
Kojo felt the pressure, as if all eyes were on him, though only Kent’s were, the girl too preoccupied with fear to even notice him, Leon and Mickey watching her.
Kent nudged him towards her. The girl seemed to notice him then, her eyes pleading.
“You don’t have to do this,” she begged. “You don’t have to -”
Leon back-handed her across the face and she let out a cry.
“Come on, try it,” Leon turned to Kojo. “This bitch deserves it. Remember that.”
Kojo stepped forward, raising his hand.
“You’re not this kind of person,” the girl said, sensing his weakness. “You’re better than them, you don’t need to -”
Kojo felt a flash of anger and slapped her across the face. The noise rang out, silencing even the girl, who had clearly not been expecting him to do it anymore than Kojo had himself.
Something had snapped.
He was sick of being told what to do, what kind of person he was. By Clint, Aurora, his parents, Scarlett, these lads, this stupid blonde girl who didn’t even know him.
She had seen his weakness, and he would prove her wrong. Prove to his mates that he was not scared, not the weak creature they thought he was.
Leon smiled, Mickey nodding in approval. Leon grabbed at the girl’s dressing gown and pulled it open, exposing her body beneath. Kojo had never seen a girl naked before, only in porn movies, in the privacy of his own bedroom.
Kent nudged him closer, and Kojo felt himself stirring, despite his nerves, his anger.
“Come on,” Kent encouraged him.
Kent again nudged Kojo forward.
“Do it, man,” he said, an order this time.
Kojo stepped forward, his feet feeling like lead. He fumbled with his belt and zipper, his hands were shaking so much. As he slid down his boxers, Leon gave out a laugh.
“He can’t even get hard,” he sniggered, nodding at him. Kojo felt embarrassed. “You reckon he’s gay or something?”
“Eugh, and he’s seen our bits,” Mickey laughed.
Kojo felt sweat pool in his armpits, dampen his forehead.
Unable to turn back now, all eyes on him, he pressed against her. He smelt her sweat, her fear, saw the way she looked at him. Her wide eyes were fearful. He closed his eyes.
He put his hands on her hips.
“Say cheese,” Kent said, and Kojo turned, saw Kent directing his phone at him, recording it all. Kojo felt nervous, on edge, but he bit his lower lip and did as was expected of him, closing his eyes once more, ashamed of his actions, still fearful, but his nerves now being soothed by the fact that he was proving himself.
He shuddered hard inside of her, letting out a noise he had not heard himself make before, and Leon and Mickey cheered, Kent grinning widely, camera still filming. Kojo pulled out of her, his shame and horror flooding back now that the arousal had faded.
“Well done, boy,” Leon said.
The girl’s eyes were closed, her face turned away, her eyes red from the tears.
Kojo turned away, pulling up his boxers and jeans, his hands still shaking as he did up his belt, but less than before. Kent put away his phone and clapped him on the back.
“You did it,” he said. “You proved yourself, mate. Let’s get fucked up.”
The boys all cheered, and they made their way out of the bedroom, out of the flat, without a backwards look at the girl still lying defeated and helpless, exposed on her bed.
Kojo felt nauseous, bile churning in his stomach, threatening to erupt.
He could not believe what he had done, could hardly fathom that he could do something like that. There was no turning back now, no changing things. His actions were done, there was no second chance to do the right thing.
Outside the flat, as Leon closed the front door behind them and lit a cigarette, Kojo swallowed down the vomit that threatened to erupt.
“Let’s get you a beer,” Kent said, smiling, arm draped round his shoulder, clearly ecstatic that his mate had proved himself. “I always knew you weren’t a faggot, don’t worry.”
Kojo managed to nod, not daring to open his mouth and speak, as he allowed himself to be led down the stairwell.
* * *
Tyrese walked briskly across the playing fields, the sky getting dark, lights flickering on in the tower blocks that surrounded the grass.
He caught sight of Jayden, but he felt no nerves, no hesitation this time. He no longer cared what he had to say, or whether a truce could be made between them.
“Sorry for your loss,” Jayden said, when they shook hands. “Trent was a good guy. He -”
“Save it,” Tyrese cut him off. He knew that Jayden had never liked his brother and the condolences sounded false in his ears coming from him. He looked at him, squaring his shoulders. “What did you want to discuss?”
“I heard about Troy,” Jayden told him. “He got himself nicked, right?”
Tyrese did not answer, but he was no expected to. Jayden already knew it was true. Tyrese realised what this was all about. When they had last spoken, Jayden had told him that Troy needed to be out of the picture before they agreed to anything. Now Troy was locked up, but Tyrese could not think about striking a deal.
He did not want any part of this life any more.
“I know what you’re going to say,” Tyrese sighed. “Whatever deal you want, I’m not interested. You want the Goldsworth Estate? You can have it. You don’t want it? Someone else can take over.”
Jayden scrutinised him, remaining silent, weighing up whether he was being honest.
“I don’t want to be involved in any of this no more,” Tyrese sighed. “What’s all the fighting for? Some rundown, shithole estate and a couple of tower blocks? We’re all killing each other so we can shift some gear and get nicked for our trouble? That isn’t the life I want now.”
