Upside Down, page 10
“Do you want me to leave and come back?” he asked her, as Oscar lay on his back between them and went back to sleep. He seemed to have no objection to the new arrangement, as long as he could continue to sleep in her bed.
“No, let’s just get dressed and make it look like you came to work early. Besides, if you leave on the Harley, the whole neighborhood will hear you. I’m supposed to look like the grieving widow.”
“You weren’t married to him,” he reminded her.
“That’s a detail. People forget things like that.”
“Do you feel guilty?” he asked her, worried.
“No, I don’t.” She hadn’t told him before, but thought she should now. “We hadn’t had sex in over five years. He had prostate surgery, which made it impossible. And I stayed faithful to him.”
“You’re a saint,” Josh said with a look of amazement, as he got out of bed in his full naked glory and she admired the beauty of his perfectly toned body. Hers was nowhere near as remarkable, although she was still beautiful, and in great shape for her age. She got up and put on a robe. She would have liked to make love to him again before they got up, but she wanted to be in the kitchen with him when Benicia came to work, for now at least. They could break Benicia in to the new regime gradually. Ardith didn’t want to shock her. She’d been fond of Bill, and was a deeply religious woman.
Josh came back from the bathroom a minute later, put on his underwear he retrieved from the floor, and his jeans. He pulled his T-shirt on, while Ardith got her own clothes on hastily and then she looked at him and laughed.
“I think your shirt is on inside out, or backwards or something.” He checked and it was both. He fixed it and then hunted for his socks but couldn’t find them.
“Did you put my socks somewhere?”
“No. Don’t worry about it, she’s not going to check if you’re wearing socks, as long as you have your pants on.” Ardith was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt. She and Josh didn’t look fresh or well dressed, but they looked respectable enough. She made coffee for both of them, and they were at the kitchen table, looking casual, when Benicia unlocked the back door three minutes later. Ardith was reading the newspaper, and Josh was making notes and handing them to Ardith as though it was a work project. All the notes said “I love you.” And Benicia marched off to the laundry room to start her day.
“Do you think we passed?” Josh whispered to Ardith, and she laughed.
“With flying colors.”
“None of the women I’ve gone out with live with their parents, so I haven’t dealt with this walk of shame shit since college. We’ll have to break the news to her eventually. I wanted to make love to you when I woke up.”
“Me too,” she whispered back. Benicia had put a cramp in their style that morning. “We’ll make up for it later.”
After breakfast, Ardith went to put some of her papers in the desk Bill had used in her now-reclaimed study, and she found more of Bill’s notes and files. She boxed them up for the museum. Josh took the box out to the garage, and reorganized some of the tools in a utility closet. Before lunch, he went home to shower and change his clothes, and right before he left Benicia walked into the kitchen with a puzzled expression, holding up two black socks.
“I found these under your pillow,” she said to Ardith, as Josh struggled to keep a straight face.
“Oscar must have put them there. They’re Bill’s, they must have fallen out of one of the boxes.” They were sending Bill’s elegant wardrobe to the museum, and small basic items like underwear and socks were going to Goodwill. But the socks Benicia held up were Josh’s and Oscar must have taken them and hid them.
“I thought so,” Benicia said. “Poor Oscar, he must miss Mr. Bill.” Oscar seemed perfectly content with the new arrangement, which Ardith couldn’t say to her faithful housekeeper, at least not this soon.
“Lucky it wasn’t my underwear,” Josh whispered to her when Benicia left the room, and then left to go to his apartment. He was going to bring back some clothes so he could change in the morning, so he would look properly dressed when Benicia arrived. It had been a close call that morning. But it was all new to them, and a nice problem to have. Things were looking up.
Ardith spent the day feeling distracted and remorseful, not because of Bill, but because she thought that Josh was making a terrible mistake. He was infatuated with her, she told herself, and he needed to be with a much younger woman, not someone her age, who would rob him of his youth and the fun he could have with a girl even younger than he was. She was too old for him, and she intended to tell him that again after Benicia left that afternoon.
When he got back in a fresh collared shirt and clean jeans, he handed her a thick envelope.
“Look what came.” He beamed at her.
“What is it?”
“It’s the script they said they’d send me.” He looked pleased and excited.
“Can I read it?” she asked him.
“Of course. I want to know what you think of it. We can share it.” He trusted her advice implicitly. What better mentor could he have than a two-time Oscar winner?
“We’ll read it tonight,” she promised. She couldn’t wait to see it and find out if the part they were offering was worth his time, or just another junk movie. She still wanted to introduce Josh to her agent. She had mentioned him to Joe Ricci, and on her recommendation, her agent said he was happy to meet him. He usually represented more established actors, who had several big movies behind them, but he was willing to consider Josh if Ardith said he was good and had talent.
They puttered around the house that day, passing time. After packing up all of Bill’s possessions, and with the funeral over, they had no big projects at the moment. Josh took Oscar for a walk, and Ardith answered a stack of condolence letters, and finally, after leaving Ardith some food in the refrigerator, Benicia left. Josh gave a whoop of glee when she did and raced into Ardith’s bedroom looking for her. He found her in her study, and she looked up with a grin when she saw him.
“Is she gone?” she asked him, standing up and walking toward him. They had both been waiting for the housekeeper to leave, so they could pursue what they had wanted to do that morning, and couldn’t because she was due to arrive any minute.
Josh followed Ardith to her bedroom, unbuttoned her shirt and jeans, and slipped his hand inside them as she moaned. She pulled his shirt off and pulled down his jeans and released him in all his splendor. Their clothes were in a heap on the floor in minutes and they were on her bed, discovering the wonders of the night before all over again, from every angle, in every way, as starved as they had been for each other only hours before. He had thought to close the bedroom door so Oscar didn’t walk off with his socks or underwear again.
Ardith had never had a partner like Josh, and he had never been as hungry for any woman as he was for her. They were insatiable, until they had made love so many times that Ardith thought it wasn’t possible, and they could hardly move as they lay on her bed.
“Oh my God, Josh, this is insane. I was going to tell you again that you need to be with someone your age or ten years younger, but I don’t think I could give this up now. I’m addicted.”
“Me too. I think you might kill me. I’ve never made love that many times in my entire life.”
“I’ve been saving myself for you.” She grinned at him, and he laughed, rolled over and kissed her.
“If I’d known it would be like this, I would have put a move on you immediately. I wanted to, but it was pure fantasy,” and they both knew this couldn’t have happened if Bill hadn’t died unexpectedly. She would never have cheated on him, and Josh loved that about her. She was someone you could trust to do the right thing. Everything about this felt right to both of them, except for their age difference, which bothered Ardith but not him. He didn’t care if she was a hundred, he loved her just as she was, and she was the sexiest woman he had ever been with. She was a wonderful lover because she loved him. He could tell with everything she did, and he felt the same way about her. It was a precious gift.
“I hope you like watching TV,” she said when they got out of bed and went to take a shower together.
“Why?”
“Because if we don’t find something else to do for a few hours, I won’t be able to sit down for a week.”
They showered and then ate the cold chicken Benicia had left for her. There was enough for both, and Ardith wondered if the housekeeper suspected something, but she doubted it. Benicia was just a generous cook.
After they ate, Josh had an idea. He told her to get her purse and refused to tell her where he was taking her. They went in the Range Rover this time, and he drove her to West Hollywood, to a bar where he used to hang out, adjacent to a bowling alley. She laughed when she saw it, and they had fun playing. She wasn’t good at it, but she enjoyed it thoroughly, and a few people came over and asked for her autograph, so Ardith and Josh knew they had been seen. But Ardith said she didn’t care. She wasn’t going to hide with him. They wanted to stay discreet for a while, but she was recognized almost everywhere, so sooner or later their secret would come out, if they stayed together and this wasn’t just a fling, which it didn’t seem to be. It felt like the real thing. The owner of the bar took a picture of them bowling and laughing, while Josh taught her how to get a firm grip on the ball. They weren’t doing anything shocking, so if it wound up in the press, it wouldn’t hurt anyone. They left soon after the owner took the picture, just to be sure no one had called the paparazzi. And they went home in good spirits. She had fun with him. Every day was a new adventure with Josh.
When they got home, she went to take a shower and let Josh get a head start reading the script. And she picked up the first pages when she joined him after her shower. An hour later, she put down what she’d read so far and looked at him seriously. Neither of them had finished it yet, but she had read enough to know that it was good, and that the part they were offering him would be a game changer for him. It would put him on the map as a serious actor, and she thought he could do it, with some coaching by a pro to refine his skills.
“You’ve got to do this,” she said in a determined tone. “It’s a great part for you. You need to change agents now, before you sign anything, accept the part, and get a coach, and your career will take off like lightning after this.”
“You really think I can do it?” He looked scared for a minute, but he loved what he had read too. He sensed that this could be the beginning of the big leagues for him. It was a huge leap, but so was being in love with Ardith Law. He felt as though he could do anything now, with her support and faith in him.
“I know you can. Trust me on this. You’ve got to take this part. Call your agent tomorrow. And I want you to go and see Joe Ricci. They’ll work out the commission if you want to switch.”
“I will. I promise.” He looked like a little kid as he said it, and she smiled at him.
“I’m so proud of you. And thank God someone finally sent you a decent script.” It had only taken ten years for that to happen.
“You’re next,” Josh said to her.
“Joe thinks he might have a good one for me. He’s talking to the producer now. He wants to make sure it’s an all-star cast before he sends me the script.”
“Wouldn’t that be cool if we’re both working on movies,” Josh said, grinning, and she laughed.
“Yes, my love, that’s the whole idea. That’s what we’re going to do. We’re both actors.”
“I hate to give up being your errand boy,” he said wistfully, “the perks have gotten pretty good lately.” He kissed her.
“Behave yourself. I want to finish reading the script.” They both went on reading after that and loved the ending. “This is great,” she confirmed to him. “It’s a go, green light all the way. This is just the beginning,” she said, excited for him, and he held her in his arms and kissed her, wondering how it had all happened, and how everything had aligned at the same time. He had the woman of his dreams and the doors to his acting career were slowly opening with quality work, after ten years of crap sci-fi and horror movies. He felt like he had won the lottery, and he lay in bed next to Ardith, smiling broadly.
“What are you looking so happy about?” she asked him. It felt as though they had always shared a bed, he was totally at home next to her, and so was she. And Oscar was sound asleep with his head on Ardith’s pillow where he liked to be, snoring softly.
“I’m the luckiest man in the world,” Josh said to her. There had been a lot of fast changes in their life in the past few weeks, but all of them for the better. Every time he looked at her he felt as though he had been catapulted through time and landed on a cloud.
“I hope you always feel that way,” she said seriously. She wanted to wait and see how he felt about it a year from now, and if he regretted being with a woman her age, instead of someone his own. But even if he did, this was sweet for now, and she wanted to cherish it for as long as it lasted. She knew it was a time she would treasure forever, however it turned out. They were taking a leap of faith and hoping it would turn out well for them both. They knew it would never be sweeter than it was right now.
* * *
—
Even a call from Morgan two weeks later didn’t spoil it for them. She called her mother in a fury one morning, when they had just gotten out of bed on a Saturday, and were having breakfast naked in the kitchen since Benicia was off on the weekends, and they had come straight from bed, starving after making love.
“You’re going bowling with him now?” were her opening words, and Ardith laughed. Even Morgan couldn’t ruin how happy she was.
“Did that wind up in the tabloids?” Ardith asked casually, refusing to get sucked into an argument with Morgan, who was enraged.
“Front page of the Enquirer,” Morgan confirmed.
“They must be low on real dirt at the moment. Yes, I went bowling with Josh.”
“I can see that for myself. You look ridiculous. Doesn’t that bother you? Going bowling with your assistant, and Bill barely cold in his grave.” It was an added dig to make her mother feel guilty, since Morgan had never cared much about Bill either way.
“I think Bill would understand. He didn’t believe in mourning anything for long. He believed that life was for the living and that it’s better to go on.”
“You can’t find something more dignified to do?”
“I had a good time,” Ardith said without apology. “And I can’t be dignified all the time, Morgan. It would bore me to tears. Josh is single, so am I. We weren’t hurting anyone. Maybe you should go bowling sometime too. It might relax you.”
“I don’t understand you, Mother,” Morgan said sharply. “You’re the biggest star in the world, the epitome of glamour, and you want to be seen going bowling?”
“I’ll do it in a ballgown next time, if that makes you feel better. You need to lighten up. You work too hard. Don’t lose your sense of humor or your sense of the ridiculous.” It was good advice.
“Well, clearly you haven’t, if ridiculous is the goal here. In that case, you achieved the desired effect flawlessly.” For an instant, Ardith was tempted to tell her that she was in love with Josh, but this wasn’t how she wanted to tell her, nor the time. She wanted to pick her moment carefully, if it finally came to that, and if she and Josh stayed together, it would.
“Thanks for the heads-up,” Ardith said pleasantly. “Have a nice weekend, lots of love, darling, talk to you soon.” She hung up before Morgan could think of anything else unpleasant to say.
“What was that about?” Josh asked Ardith as he set a plate of scrambled eggs down in front of her. He liked cooking for her, and he was a better cook.
“It was Morgan. We made the front page of the Enquirer going bowling. I figured the owner of the bar would sell the picture.” She didn’t look bothered by it and Josh looked at her seriously.
“Are you upset?”
“Not in the least,” she said, and he believed her. She didn’t look it. She looked blissfully happy and so did he. They had made love as soon as they woke up.
“Did you tell her we were having breakfast naked?”
“I didn’t get around to it. I’ll tell her next time.”
“Good.” Even Morgan couldn’t spoil the fun they were having, or their joyful days, and waving the specter of Bill hadn’t worked either. Ardith was sure that wherever he was now, he was happy for her. She had been a perfect companion to him for a dozen years, but now it was her turn, and she was enjoying it to the fullest with Josh. She had no excuses to make to anyone, and certainly not to her daughter, who had criticized every move she made for the past twenty years. It was time for Morgan to get a life of her own. It was Ardith’s time with Josh now, and nothing was going to spoil it for them. Ardith wouldn’t let that happen, and neither would Josh. They had both waited a long time for what had come to them now so unexpectedly, and despite the years between them, neither of them wanted to give it up. They wanted to do all they could to protect it. It was beginning to seem real. And Ardith hoped it was.
Chapter 8
When Morgan got back to New York on Monday night after Bill’s funeral, she sent Ben a brief text, just to let him know she was home. She got no response, and assumed he was already asleep, since she didn’t get back to her apartment till two in the morning. But he didn’t respond on Tuesday morning either, which was atypical of her experience with him in the short time since they’d met. He had responded to all her texts immediately until then.
She had back-to-back surgeries on Tuesday, a heavy appointment schedule in the office in the afternoon, and postsurgical patients to check before she went home that night. And she had dinner plans with Ben on Wednesday night. He had been enthusiastic about making plans with her, and exquisitely prompt each time she’d seen him. He wasn’t a flake like so many of the men of her own generation whom she’d gone out with. It was hard to take younger men seriously, and she eventually stopped seeing them because they had so little understanding of her demanding schedule and dedication to her work.
